2 weeks clean from heroin

2 weeks clean from heroin.

AMA

can you count on two hands how many times you used?

I used on and off for 3 years. I've shot up 5 or 6 times just to see what it's like. Mostly smoked from foils or bongs sometimes, doing dabs and shit.

So no, I can't count, because it's been at least 1000 times.

Are you using kratom or methadone to deal with the withdrawals?
Attending N.A. meetings or anything like that?

No. I locked myself in my house voluntarily. Besides a few packs of smokes and a few subs the first few days.

But yeah, I got respect for anyone who can do it cold turkey. THe problem with cold turkey is that it lingers for a week after even the first 5 horrible days, the pains, mild pains, and it's unbearable.

So if you wean down with anything like a sub or kratom to ease the pain, it'll help a lot.

Drinking can help too but usually it'll just give you a headache and you'll just shit it out 20 minutes later.

Even with subs though you'll still deal with pain, and it's mentally tough just as it is physically.

So now I'm totally clean. No drugs in my system.

When you say you shot up 5 or 6 times just to see what it's like what do you mean? What were the reasons for the other 1000 times? That small of a number seems significant

Right on, man. I'm proud of you!

When do you think you'll relapse, what do you think the odds are that you'll get HIV, and how long do you think until you're dead?

I wanted to see why so many people can't quit the needle, just how much better it is. It's about 4 to 5 times more intense than smoking from foil and about 2 or 3 times stronger than smoking from a bong.

You literally feel like you're walking on clouds. No worry in the world, it's like the coziest blanket on you times 100, no problems bother you.

Dangerous stuff. Super easy to fall in love with it for life, and it sneaks up on you, first you like it, a month or 2 later you're physically hooked and you're fucked. Some people never leave that comfort zone.

What were the circumstances in which you first tried H? Why'd it seem like a good idea at the time?

Also, what were the slang terms for it wherever you are? I've heard it called horse, dog food, and heather where I live. (Southern US)

Why do you fuckheads, who aren't smart enough to stay the hell away from heroin, always thinking anyone gives two shits about you getting the monkey off yer back.

How does a sub help ease you off heroin? I mean, yeah, they're delicious, but at the end of the day, it's just a glorified cold cut sandwich.

Can you hook me up with some heroin

are you going to go for 3?

Good shit. Dealing with alcoholism atm. Hate being drunk so I don't drink at all during the day. But at 11 I drink probably 6 shots at once just to be able to sleep. Hate myself in the morning. Not because hungover, but because I can do better.

There are no odds I'll get HIV because the needles are used were packaged and new, and I would never share a needle...

I've quit 3 or 4 times before and relapsed. This time it's different, but there's still a small chance I might relapse.

The thing is, I just got tired of not having any money, not any kind of lifestyle, all I'd do is get heroin and sell everything I own to get more. That's no life to live my friend. You lose the will to live. Heroin breaks you. Never try it.

If you're curious what it feels like try a xanax, it's kind of similar, but more relaxing. Never touch the stuff. I curse the day I tried it. But I stopped drinking when I started using H sooo yeah, but it's super dangerous stuff. It can eat your soul in no time.

When are you going to relapse, because you know you will, you weak junkie fuck..

No one likes a quitter.

Learn to drug properly you retard.

You sleeping through the night yet? Lots of using dreams? Getting your boners back? Still get emotional when songs come on?
Stay with it, the rest of your life starts soon

Kek

I think OP's talking about buprenorphine. It's a opioid medication used to help with withdrawal symptoms.

I met a girl I liked, we hooked up, she was cute, hot, short haircut, and did H. I had money, she had H. I've always researched about drugs and been wanting to try it for years. Worst mistake ever.

But I was surprised when I first tried it how simple it was. It's not intense, it's subtle. This feeling of relaxation just sneaks up on you and it just feels like a strong pain pill...but nothing crazy like super intense.

But that feeling man, that feeling will kill you. Many people chase it till their last days. Not for me. If you have values and value family, have goals, and believe in having a meaningful life you can jump off. But if you ruin your life so bad that there's a really long way to try to fix it all then you might be stuck forever.

Slang? Over here on the West coast it's called dark, black, smack, H, down, just typical stuff you can think off. I hear many dealers call it steak too...but i don't hear much of it, must be an east coast think. Chicken is coke and steak is black.

I just wanna answer some questions for people who are curious. I dont give a fuck, don't need no pity, just taking a break from work and bored.

So, like a meatball sub then?

Suboxone or Subutex, it binds to the H receptors and helps your body wean down. It makes the difference between not sleeping for 120 hours withdrawaling going insane to actually getting a few hours of sleep and being able to function.

Without the suboxone you will shit yourself, throw up, cramp, and feel like you're dying. Especially people quitting from needle they can feel like killing themselves to avoid the pain and many have.

Can't shoot up when you're too busy scarfing one of the these bad boys down!

Cold cuts! The anti-drug!

Can you hook me up with some heroin

No I will never buy heroin for anyone again, and I rarely did that. I just shared for free sometimes.

That stuff is Satan incarnate.

I drank half a budweiser today and couldn't finish it. I used to drink a 6 pack and a few shots every night man.

Right now.

sorry the opiates got you dude. those phrama :( but also good luck on your heroin treatment. I hope the best for you

So, do you prefer Subway or Quiznos?

Yeah I get 6 hours of sleep most nights now. I'm 90% back to normal. Food tastes better, appetite came back, boners are raging, music sounds so much better....got very emotional a few times listening to songs about mom and stuff, cried my eyes out and moved on. Gotta keep fighting.

Thanks for the positive comment bud.

Is Blimpy still around? Those were the shit!

What the fuck is this guy doing? Why would you start eating from the middle? He's gonna make a mess.

There's no treatment. You just quit, delete all numbers to do with heroin and move on with your life. It's the only way. You can be addicted to suboxone too, you can keep using it cause it gets you somewhat high, and then once you have enough money saved up you'll go buy again.

Hope I'm there one day

I've done this before. Sometimes I only want half a sub, but I don't have a knife, so I just mow through the middle of that cocksucker and wrap one half up.

Hope I'm there one day. How did you do it

Can u atleast hook me up with some weed

Bro the only way is to sabotage your friendships that have anytihng to do with H. Cut off all your sources, lock yourself up in your house for a week, take many hot baths, have anti diarrhea medication, vitamins, at least 5 suboxones, or go to a clinic and get a whole bunch of them for free with insurance.

Leave that life behind brother. Your decaying and heroin got you trapped. I've wasted 4 years to that dark pit of hell all because I wanted to see what it was like and liked the girl that was using it. Typical and stupid.

Why can't you quit? what's the hardest for you?

It's called will power you fucking drunk faggot.

You, sir, are a monster.

>2 weeks clean from heroin.

Cmon man just a little taste. Just a little bit. Just a little taste.

>This time it's different
How?

Tomorrow.

Because it's not the last 3 times he's fucked up. This is a brand new time to fuck up!

I'm just done. I'm exhausted of the lifestyle, the shitty people that sell and use heroin, selfish, ruthless, scummy, just not good people.

I'm done. I don't want it in my life anymore. I'll just change to drinking beer a few nights a week just like I used to and that's enough for me.

I don't like drug dealers, most are not good people. You can do 100 things for them and they wouldn't do one back for you. That's how many of them are.

Honestly it's more about people than H...I just don't want to be dependent on those type of people anymore. So I'm done.

>Without the suboxone you will shit yourself, throw up, cramp, and feel like you're dying.

Meh - this is what some people need to remind them of how bad it gets. I've seen people on suboxone or methadone for years - still junkies as far as I'm concerned.

why not just keep using it and die happy?

Seriously.

What are you doing differently this time to ensure you're "done?"

literal licensed addiction therapist here, CAADC ant IDDT certified.

Yep, if you're using methadone or suboxone for more than 2 weeks you're just using another version of heroin. It's another addiction. Only way is to wean the heavy pain that's in the first 4 to 5 days, and then be done with it.

And heroin doesn't really make you happy, it makes you just content and fine with being just whatever. You can be sleeping in a shit stained toilet and you'll be Ok with it. You're just decaying.

Heroin just decays your mind, body, and soul.

I've purposely sabotaged my friendship with my main dealer that had the best stuff. I'm not talking to anyone else and deleted their number. When they message me I don't talk to them, and from now on if I get anyone calling or messaging me I'm gonna say unless they're clean I can't even talk to them and definitely not see them.

I'm working out since day one. Jogging is amazing. It clears your mind so much and give you motivation. The natural high from working out is so much more subtle and relaxing than any heroin could be.

It actually feels good to be healthy. And I'm not thinking about H so much anymore because I'm constantly keeping myself busy, eating healthy, tanning, and taking care of myself.

What would you recommend?

How can i get some heroin

Suck some dick and you'll get some.

Handle it. I slammed for 3 years, been clean for 4. My friend i used around is now using, just spoke with him yesterday. Lived out of my car, been to prison, after a couple short years clean i had a kid and got married, left the state. I have a car now but i live in a house, no more moving from starbucks to jack in the box bathrooms just to feel normal.
You sound like youve got the conviction to do what it takes this time. The urge to use will go away over time. Anyone who can quit has a lot to be proud of.

All of that is good, but you won't get anywhere without a solid suport system.

People. Good people who care about you and your sobriety. That's what you need. AA or NA are good places to start. Fuck god and fuck the steps - you can do them if you want, but it's the people supporting you that make the difference. Or you can see if your area has SMART recovery meetings, which is secular and not based on the 12 steps.

People who understand what you're going through and support you. Find them.

SOBER people, mind you. Other people in recovery ideally.

Right on brother. I'm just at the point where I'm sick and disgusted with myself about how much I hurt my family and myself, and I can't stand heroin dealers, I despise them, most of them aren't good people.

I just want those types of people out of my life. Cutting everyone off. And I understand it's business...

But one heroin dealer told me how people would come sick and he'd enjoy watching them be sick for 2 or 3 hours before giving them their stuff because it makes him feel powerful and in control.

I wanted to dislocate his jaw right there on the spot. But I didn't. But that's the type of people that succeed in selling, people with no soul.

I've always been lonely and not had many friends. I'll eventually go to AA classes 'cause I'm curious what it's like, but I've always done everything by myself.

My values in life state that life is way more than just feeling good all the time, it's about something bigger than yourself. Helping others, being a good person, helping those in need, taking care of family, and not being selfish.

I'll keep thinking about the bigger picture and I'll stay strong.

Plenty of people have quit on their own though, in prison, outside of prison, and so forth. How did they do it?

I know, theyre piles of shit, most of them lagged on purpose, but there will come a day when youre so far removed that youll look back and laugh. Remember how bad you feel now, thats crucial. The guilt will fade as well. I dont know you, but im so fucking proud, you have no idea what good things life has in store for you.

I've never met an addict who quit by themselves. Being lonely is the hole that heroin once filled - you need to fill it with something. Good people who care about you help fill that hole - then if you stick with AA or NA you can help others in turn.

12 step programs get a bad rap for being "cults" and overly religious. There are some people in there who are like that, but they should be ignored. The overall purpose is to help each other. As a therapist I continue to recommend them because they're free and easily accessible. Walk into a room and you will instantly find people willing to help you. You can't get that anywhere else. If you find it's not for you, at least try to find a therapist or someone who knows what you're going through to help you through the rough times - because they are most likely coming. The most common times for relapse are one month, three months, six months, and one year. You're on a "high" right now because being clean is new and exciting. It will fade, and you will need help getting through it. But push through that, and it can get better than you'd ever imagine.

They didn't. Talk to any one of them and they will tell you that they had at least someone help them along the way. A lover, friend, family member, etc.

Thank you bro, I really appreciate it. Can't wait until I'm a month clean. Two weeks away.

Thanks for the support.

All right. I have bad social anxiety though but I'll try to go to some meetings.

I've been kind of looking for new people to hang out with now 'cause it sucks being alone all the time, but yeah. I'm pretty lonely. Need some good people in my life. Definitely one of the reasons I did H is loneliness and anxiety, for sure.

God bless. And if you ever run into nick from salinas tell him i love him

I'm from Washington, what are the odds I will hehe?

things continue getting so much better, keep at it boss.

I could barely walk outside my apartment and get the mail the first week I was clean due to anxiety. It gets better - and people in recovery will understand.

Do this if you want: make a list of the things you want out of sobriety right now. When you've beat this thing, after a couple of years being clean, look back at it. You'll see that you've short changed yourself. It's pretty amazing.

I'd say good luck but it's not luck. It's hard work, but it's work anyone is capable of doing. You got this.