Yo Sup Forums, I'm 100% positive my mom just walked in on me beating my meat and I had no fucking clue...

Yo Sup Forums, I'm 100% positive my mom just walked in on me beating my meat and I had no fucking clue. Act like it just never happened or what? pic related

How is pic related?

Pretend it didn't happen

I was watching Gianna getting slammed with headphones on, so I didn't hear her open my door to let the dog in.

Yeah I figure if she doesn't say anything, neither will I. Good talk, bud.

Walk out of your room naked and pretend you didn't know your mom was home. Maybe she'll give you a quick suck.

see if she acts like nothing happened.
then play along.
then take it further, masturbating with your door open, leaving cum on the bathroom tiles, walking around with a rock hard erection, wanking in the kitchen, in the living room. soon you will be king of your house, dethrone your father and have your pick of the women.

but that's just one mans opinion.

Try to do it again, but be more aware from now on. Ask her to help

I guess I should fill you all in since you've given some advice, it's almost 3AM so i figured she would be asleep but didn't expect the dog to bark at the door and she would have to get up since my headphones were on.

I feel like if she had any inkling of that though she probably would've taken her chances then?

Is she hot?

Be sure you're clearly watching MILF porn next time

any pics??

Average face, big tits. Good enough to hit if she wasn't my mom.
Good idea, to really give off the vibe that she'd be welcome.

how big are we talking here

Does she look good in a bikini?

OMG you sick fucks stop telling him to commit incest

Your mom knows men jerk off.

Don't look too much into it.

Just ignore it. Maybe it'll make her more cautious about your privacy and not barge in. Everyone jerk off. Itll be fine

> All stories
> Works of fiction
> Blah blah
> Profit

OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

this

You should sleep with your sister. I know you've always wanted to.

You guys are sick perverts. You disgust me!
Have a try at the dog instead. What race is he?

R u real?

>implying your mom's gianna micheals

Leave your home as soon as possible, and then return as little as possible, completely distance yourself from your entire family so you never have to re live the embarrassment again.

totally this

She knew. She is happy you aren't knocking someone up. Act like it never happened.

nigga every single person in my family has walked in on me, at this point idgaf anymore

Akitas are the hottest. They like taking in the ass. It's all exposed naturally while walking with his tail curled upwards. Like it's teasing you to put a dick in it.

>gianna
>she's probably relieved you're not a faggot

well we are obviously dealing with a cocktail wiener situation here

Your mom has given birth seeing u jack off aint shit

Stand up for yourself. Its normal for a man to masturbate and thats what you tell your mom. Maybe ask her to respect your privacy a bit more in the future.

Its kinda hard to say that when I did it in the living room...

did you finish?

Just mind your own business and hope that one day your dad comes up to you and says "So I hear you are bigger than me down there."

Boy was that the most uncomfortable ego boost I ever had.

can your dad fit his penis inside your penis?

well you I didn't know she had seen it, was just fapping

>did it in the living room

Damn, son, what is wrong with your bedroom?

oh right
you should try to cum on her tits if she's hot
get into mutual mother-son fwb relationship
and none of this one time, two time bullshit
fuck her like all the time

But what about the smell?

Walk out and ask her to smell your finger...

Isn't gianna MILF?

Most likely not. Never tried. I refused to whip mine out in his presence.

What Gianna scene were you watching? Be honest here we won't hate you.

that's unfortunate, I'm sorry for your loss