Life is a fucking joke

life is a fucking joke
I'm 26, married, own a home, have 3 dogs. My wife is a cunt and I come second to everything else in her life now. I haven't accomplished a single noteworthy thing in my life, didn't even finish an associates degree. I just work hard and tend to the house and my pups.
I haven't been on here in years but I'm not gonna be a little bitch and post this shit to Facebook.
Basically, no matter how well everything might be going in your life, if you were a joke with no self confidence to begin with, you'll never be anything else, because that's how you truly feel and you're the only fucker who matters.
Just fucking give up god I want to blow my fuckin brains out

I feel you OP IM pretty much the same here

I told my wife how I feel and she was saying sorry and I just didn't believe her, it was so insincere.
I'm always the one who was to initiate affection, hug her, touch her. I know that I don't really need it that much but god damn one fucking she could flirt me with me, set shit in motion.
I told her I didn't believe her when she was saying sorry and I haven't talked to her in two days, we're just ignoring each other.
I would get a divorce but I don't believe in that, I would kill myself but I would hurt my huge family.
I'm just super depressed, maybe I'll go work out, but probably not because I'm fucking mediocre as shit and I just don't care

Uhhh, you could buy a motorcycle.


It worked for some of the rest of us.

You need a good side piece, it's time to reverse this shit on her.

You can change, OP. No reason you have to be the same as you've always been.

No self-confidence? Try a meditation and exercise program, or maybe opiates. Both will be effective, but one is healthier than the other...

You just need to up your serotonin and dopamine. Exercise more, do something creative (write a book, draw, make an RPG Maker game, etc.), meditate, smoke some heroin, shoot up a school. The possibilities are infinite.

>I'm 26, married, own a home, have 3 dogs.
>haven't accomplished a single noteworthy thing in my life

you have a HOUSE,A WIFE AND MULTIPLE DOGGOS A GOOD JOB AND COULD PROBABLY HAVE KIDS.

>Just fucking give up god I want to blow my fuckin brains out

are you masturbating to hentai, claiming disability and living with your elderly parents?

Its not strictly a meme, people live like pic related.

to get tumblr for a minute, have you checked your own privilege and seen that life could be a LOT WORSE?

talk to someone, a sucicide hotline whatever. but really you have nothing to feel sad about.

I like you
Thanks

I get that completely, actually makes me feel worse for being so ungrateful.
Damn, I don't know, I've always been super apathetic about life and never felt it was worth living. Were born, we struggle, we have some good times, blah, blah, etc., then we die.

You're right though, I have a lot in my life, I have a lot to be thankful for. I love and care deeply for those around me I just wish that it was reciprocated more often

Op, no kids? Split that shit. Leave without notice. Burn down the relationship and start over. The generation we're in only cares about self and pacifying ones self like a leech.

Don't be like everyone else. Be more. Do what you like and go for what YOU set to be Your goals. Along the road you'll find a woman that wants to share her journey with you and amplify who you are and what you can do and hopefully you'll be compelled to do the same for her. A maddening sacrifice for each other to do better and better and experience newer and character building circumstances.

Did you join the air force

People aren't responsible for your emotions. Only you are. If you're feeling worthless, odds are it's your own insecurities making you feel that way. Get help, don't blame your wife, and certainly "don't flip the table" and get a side piece - that's just going to temporarily make you feel better but in the end add a whole hell of a lot of fuel to the "worthless fire"

calm down, look at things and try to move on really.

Leave the cunt and become a bartender.

This.

Take control of who you want to be. If wife doesn't want to grow with you then hard decisions need to be made. You don't feel repected? You don't express and show love to her? Time to male changes. Fix it or end it and most certainly kill Insecurities,

Fuck you, at least you have a wife. Enjoy your misery, Chad.

you want to kill yourself? good, youre free now. go to mecca and give those terrorists a taste of their own medicine. go live everyday as if its your last. whats wrong? i thought you lost hope? now you suddenly want to live? everyday is a new adventure youre too affraid to go on, fuck all the sketchy bitches. who cares about stds you were gonna kill yourself remember?

I'm not a cheater, I wouldn't do that and honestly I would like to make this work.
But I'm so depressed and I can't change that, I don't take meds for it because I hate that shit.
She knows that I deal with this and as far as I know she doesn't seem to have these problems. She knows that I get severely depressed, she knows that sometimes I just won't talk or I'll be super irritable for no good reason so she won't provoke it.
This is my insecurities coming out but if she depends on me for emotional well being can I not ask the same from her for just once.
I know I made our problems worse, I'm insecure, I'm depressed, I'm unstable, im suicidal, I have ADHD(I don't medicate it, I legitimately have this), and I feel that I'm somewhat bipolar but she knows these things and I usually contain it to myself but I think I've let it get too far.

Honestly I'm here talking to all of you because I know talking about it will take me off the ledge, so to speak.
And my wife seems to not want to deal with me and that's fine, I don't think it's fair to put this on others.
I just feel so unloved and as if I'm always an afterthought to her now.

Wait, do you mean that since I don't feel respected it's likely that it's because I don't express and show love to her?
Maybe that's true and I don't do those things enough but in the op I said that it's the opposite, I do these things for her because I want to and that I now feel like an afterthought to her.

Sounds like you're expecting a certain happiness from the wrong things. Be more connected with nature. An associates degree is literally nothing in reality. Don't expect someone else to make you happy. Only you can fill that void by worshipping the nature of space and natural reality.

Boom, problem solved. Unappreciated and overworked, fighting so hard to make a living and feeling Unloved. Need guidance and reassurance that it'll be okay. You're doing your best and surviving basic things that count. You're already ahead. You not yet dead and can decide to change for better or worse, your decision.

go and have an affair.

Copy. I posted a follow up. I know exactly how you feel...I was there in my last relationship. I ended it because I was the one being abused, emotionally, spiritually, verbally. I was manipulated. Didn't want to accept it. That she was the only one for me.. nope. I was paying for all her father's faults. She has daddy issues. I became the punching bag. That had to end. I left it all to her. Now I'm married. Wife is infinitely suited to who I am and like wise me to her. We have a one year old daughter and another on the way. It's hard to support them but a joy to have them. I've grown more responsible, dedicated, assertive, compassionate, I've lost weight, work full time, and building a small company on the side. It's not easy. I fight my inner fat boy each day. That kid needs to starve to death and WHO I AM and want to become stays hungry for life.

Stop trying to ruin the mans life.

Op, court your wife like the old days. Make her want to initiate affection. Women become cold when they themselves feel inadequate.
I understand you don't want to talk or will be super irritable because of your mental health, but you surely are no idiot and realize that when this happens it affects her too. I'm sure she's gotten in the path of your mood before and had paid the price. You should talk to her. You married her, and you sound like a good guy. Try to fix it with all you have.

This is just a template, something to use and compare. Pick it apart. Insert what you want out of life and make short and long term plans on what suits you. Be prepared to sacrifice a lot to accomplish what you deem worthy of your time and efforts. Be it material things, honorable things, spiritual things, you health, etc. Just try not to hurt anyone in the process, especially not yourself. The world as it is will do enough to harm you, insult you, ridicule, and condemn you. Your responsible for you. Your thoughts, actions, decisions. How are YOU going to change the outcome of your life? You can do it. You have a big heart. Just need he right formula to mix it with sone kind of drive, passion, desire.

relationship is a reflection between two humans. everything that happens does happen because of the two. but sometimes one of them cannot refelect. cannot give ou what you need. than you need to have a plan b

Sorry for the spelling errors and punctuation...hard day, but I made it and I'm here!

Seriously thanks friend thank you

And thank you too, I appreciate your thoughts on the situation but the guy above really made things clear, I get why she'd respond in these ways. She's never abused me physically or verbally but she does have baggage form her alcoholic father but she's never taken it out on me like that, she did somewhat compate me to her dad one time, just once and i made it clear that i am nothing like her father and she had been drinking and I've never received that from her again.


Anyways, I do want this marriage to last because she means everything to me, she understands me and puts up with my shit and I know I haven't been the man that show love in the respectful manner, as in appreciating the things she's done for me or how she alongside me takes care of the household.
I'm gonna work hard at this because I only married because I knew it would be lifelong. I put myself in this spot, mentally, and her as well. Time to get us out of it.

1st of all why do you have a picture of plane porn?

Here's an illustration.

Make it work for you babe. If the counterpart doesn't want to meet you where you're at, decision's have to be made. You're still young don't waste time.

It was exactly what I needed man, thank you so much!

>opiates for self confidence
This is so true, the only thing that my self confidence trumps on is when I'm on phenibut and a beer or two. Also poppy seed tea is like the easiest way to get large doses of cheap morphine. 5-7 lb bags usually cost 30 bucks and you can get like 30 doses out of that if you're not opiate tolerant. If you're a long time tar slammer, it'll still be more than effective but it'll be more around 7 doses.

I spent a lot of time on /k/ and it's a good shock image

You don't have to feel bad about the life you're living. You're simply not doing what you feel you should be. There are desires, potential, capacity for incredible things within you...but you settled. Somewhere along the line you said "fuck it" to everything that was risky, the doors slightly ajar, the chance to jump into a beautiful unknown. But listen here motherfucker...you will get NOTHING you don't sacrifice for or take a chance on. You have no kids to hurt by breaking up your marriage. It's time you took control of your life.

I just don't trust myself with those things.
I have thought about adderall to help me succeed. I went to my doctor to figure out what my problem is, I legitimately have ADHD, I just hate being reliant on drugs.
But I'm gonna detox for now, no booze or weed for the next month and I may see my doctor about getting a prescription for adderall at the smallest dose because I feel like I'm hitting a wall lately.

What this user says! I don't know how long you've been married but having a side piece has been the key in making my marriage last for 15 years. It brings out your alpha and that confidence radiates. Just make sure you can trust the mistress to not fuck you over. No strings, just hot sweaty sex that is good for both of you. Single mom's with grown kids are gold.

Throw in excersise.

Don't be afraid of psichologists men