The coolest name for Trail Mix

The coolest name for Trail Mix.

Alright Sup Forumstards.

I've been here almost 15 years. I've never made a PA request before.

But I need the full force of Sup Forums knowledge for this one.

I need the coolest name for Trail Mix you can think of.

When I first came to Sup Forums I was like you all. Virgin, pathetic, you name it, I was it.

>be 40
>have kids
>only way they will eat well is if I think of cool names for stuff
>so stir fry is Kung Fu Noodles, cos they love Kung Fo Panda
>chopped apples, raisins and maple syrup is Mouse Surprise - the chopped apples are chopped mouse brain, the raisins are mouse droppings, and the syrup is Sticky Mouse Piss
>anything with tofu is Chilled Monkey Brain
>beef is Dead Cow, pork is Pig Legs, etc etc

>etc

The 5yo has just started school and he is hungry as fuck.

>he's mungry

He needs snacks for break time, he needs fuel for his tae-kown-do, I have him doing football, cross-fit, tennis, he is an active little ball bag.

I am making flapjacks and I have those down, they are Ground-Up Dead People.

I take huge delight in giving him names from the profanisaurus, the big pocket on his schoolbag where he keeps the food is the Otter's Pocket, the little side pocket is the Wizard's Sleeve.

Basically I want everybody who meets him to be as repulsed as possible while not actually being able to take offence. He would never swear.

But trail mix, I am fucking stumped. I bought kilograms of nuts, seeds, dried fruit, and plastic boxes, and I've distributed kilograms of this stuff into these containers.

But I can't send him to school until I have a profane name for trail mix.

>Help wu out.

Deer droppings

>kiLOGrams

yeah, i already have cadbury's mini rolls and they are Bear Poo. Can't use too many swear words as he has to be able to say this stuff constantly to teachers without anybody really being able to take offence. Anything with the word logs would amuse me, but not really offend his teachers.

too lame

M&Ms with obstacles

although now you have me thinking

Sixx Mixx?

Rocks n stuff
>hard granola are the rocks
>other stuff is the stuff
Also your kids are probably retarded if they need food to be named special things so they'll eat it

oh, they're definitely retarded. we keep the oxygen levels very low inside the house.

to be honest, I think they'd beat you in a spelling bee, but thats by the by, i don't know how old you are, you might be 5 as well.

Gorp

gonna have to go with something toenail clipping related i guess.

your five fuck you

kibble nibbles

its *you're

is there a polite word for foreskin?

I now see where they get their retardation

Coon Stew

Snoodle Noodle

Hitler Mix

2 in the pink and 1 in the stink mix

Ebola granola

i like hitler mix. nothing innately offensive about the name. good.

i don't think you do, I think you just heard the phrase and think it would be appropriate to say just then.

next time write:

>i see now where.....

or get your carer to hold your big hand and help you write it.

now coon, is great. I had a black friend and we always called him coon, nigwog, any kind of mildly but not terribly offensive name in public.

nicknamed him Chief Mububu Ombongwe and now his nieces and nephews call him Chief Mububu. amazing.

>fucking winrar. thats it. Ebola Granola.

Thank You Sir.

I'm just playing with you, mister. I actually am 5 and know that it is 'you're' and not 'your'. You see, I was making a joke. I thought it would be most humorous to pretend to be the user you had initially replied to, while also pretending to be very upset by your post. In order to do this, I wrote a brief and poorly crafted post in order to evoke the laughter from your gut, chest or throat(not sure where your laugh is, but mine is in my heart).

You see user, It was not a typo because it was intentional. And I posted it because I love you.

tldr; I like being weird on Sup Forums

As for names, you could try monkey bait. As in, it's the bait you use to get monkeys for the monkey brains. Or maybe something like Bird Bone Crumble? My gf says, and I quote, " I like Fairy Poop".

"The 5yo has just started school and he is hungry as fuck.

>he's mungry

He needs snacks for break time, he needs fuel for his tae-kown-do, I have him doing football, cross-fit, tennis, he is an active little ball bag."

>5 years old

>crossfit

wat

Coon scribble

mungry = Man Hungry

>kids cross fit is all kinds of stuff like steps and angles, good for the ankles.

have you never seen the videos of the awesome oriental kids who are 5yo and doing MJ dance moves? 5yo kids can learn loads of cool stuff to amuse their rents.

ok, now its a toss-up between coon scribble and ebola granola. i guess coon scribble would have a lil more inkyness. maybe raisins or curly hairs.

Youd be suprised at my gym they do a crossfit course and mothers bring their kids along. Either cant find babysitters or whatever. Class of 20 8 women 4 bring their kids. Some milfs in the group. Would.

in our household we call that the shocker

How about horse nipples.

Oompa loompa poop. They work so hard. Wonka collects their poop.

we have foam mushrooms for that. get up to scratch or leave the program.

Mohel kibble

you can't just make words up, he is 5. its got to make some fucking sense.

Ann frank ash. Easy to remember for your autistic kids

yeah i'm not gonna let him watch that degenerate wonka unti he is 18, if then.

>tramp stamp`

don't see how you're making it easy on big autismo and little austimino with a 3 word name for a 2 word snack, but i like Anne Frank Ash

Keked hard
>what are you eating little user
Ann frank ash!
>oh...ok

I won't cast my pearls before swine. If you can't be bothered to google it, I'm not explaining it to you.

hi. just joined us?

perhaps from a Simple Childrens' Institute? found this thread due to a google search gone wrong?

i need alternative names for trail mix. its a 3-dimensional snack made up of nuts, dried fruit and the bits I pick off my dry heels after a weekend in the cold working on my car in the driveway drunk.

a tramp stamp is a 2 dimensional tattoo on your mum's back.

not really sure how this would be intended to help me?

well, jokes on you because I did google it. here is the screenshot.

either you cant spell, or you're not funny.

either way, primary school is not for you.

>Next!

u tell your 5 year old they are eating mouse shit and u wonder why they wont eat...

fucking moron

Can you describe your kids real quick. They do crossfit so they are supple yes?

A mohel is the dude who does circumcisions. I hope they teach little Frankenstein how to use the googles cos Lord knows he's not learning it from home.

hey. sorry this hasn't tickled your nickel.

I've just fixed the issue, can you reboot yourself and refresh the thread?

Doesn't understand how adverbs are placed in sentences.
>I hope you understand how much you are fucking your kids up

Path coalesce

alright shylock, thanks for your motherfucking input

not enough, thats why I made the thread. how is proper adverb placement working out for ya. getting laid a lot?

hang on a sec, i've lost them. pic related.

...

Do a russian theme because russia is in the news... Call it "Comrad Pavel's Good Time Gravel"

top scorer right here.

A decent amount
>girls like guys that don't sound like mongoloids

shit, man, sorry to hear that

>what do you do to get round it; just smile and nod?

I was just installing cameras in a jail and the warden guy had this stuck to his white board in the break room. Who is that guy?