What you're about to hear is an epic tale, one the likes of which mortal men will sing songs about...

What you're about to hear is an epic tale, one the likes of which mortal men will sing songs about. This is the tale of the Game of Lounges.
>be me
>college freshman, 18 years old, majoring in Sup Forumssic
>move into dorm with friend from high school
>fellow shitposter, we'll call him Tyrion
>joke about pissing on our suitemates' shit if we don't like them
>"we'll snarl like dogs if they try to come in"
>meet them finally
>one is cool, we'll call him "Ned"
>the other one sits on his computer all day watching anime
>we'll call him "Arthur"
>start getting to know the rest of our floor
>two boys, Jaime (a normie) and Theon (a stoner)
>two girls, Cersei (former student body president of her high school), and Ros (youth group girl, "I love pizza" type)
>bunch of other people not important to story
>RA announces that there are going to be elections for a floor representative
>nothing huge, they just go to meetings and hear about building events
>no interest in the position
>suddenly see Cersei's face light up
>"I want to run!"
>she is immediately backed by Ros and Jaime
>Tyrion and I look at eachother
>no words are said, just mutual contempt for youth group kids
>I speak
> "I want to run"
>room is silent
>I make eye contact with Cersei
>the game of lounges has begun

>second week
>we start fucking with the RA, just lighthearted shit
>we'll call him Jon Snow
>put a picture of an anime girl on his door
>"Jonny-Chan"
>He laughs and takes it down
>Loves me and Tyrion
>around this time, socks begin to appear on his doorknob
>college speak for "I'm getting the puss"
>can't believe I just typed that
>This gets the RA slightly upset, he begins asking at meetings who is doing it
>Nobody fesses up
>At the same time, I begin to get closer to Cersei and her friends
>Jaime laughs triumphantly after Jon leaves the lounge, it's been him doing the socks
>and he's had the help of Cersei and Ros
>Ideas begin to form in my brain
>share a glance with Tyrion
>this is war
>start making jokes with Cersei, "haha, we're gonna betray you like on Game of Thrones"
>little does she know
>the gears
>are
>turning

keep going

better yet...don't

please more

>catch Theon in the hallway
>find out that he's running
>War of the Three Kings
>make a joke about maiming him if he wins
>"haha dude...user you're a funny guy"
>his eyes are bright red
>mfw
>go back into my dorm and get to work on a project
>Tyrion has a chronic problem with masturbating to hentai
>does it so much, we joke with suitemates about him encasing us all in shells of cum
>turning us into a sort of "cum lobster"
>two hours later, Tyrion and I have completed our masterpeice
>Hang upon our door, a large paper banner, adorned with our sigil, a lobster, and our house words, "Bitter and Salty"
>We are HOUSE CUMLOBSTER
>Written at the bottom is the phrase "Pledge Fealy, or thou willst not survive the wars to come"
>A signup sheet sits below
>now we wait...

continue, faggot.

Continue op

Moar

>wake up next morning
>8 AM class and it's 7
>music building is a 15 minute walk away from my dorm
>ohshit.jpg
>shower in five minutes, brush teeth and head out the door
>as I enter the hallway, I stop dead in my fucking tracks
>they have
>torn
>down
>our
>banner
>..............
>no more mercy
>when you play the game of lounges, you win or you die
>after class I come back to my hall
>Head to Cersei and Ros's room with Ned
>Put on a smiling, and amicable face
>"hey, you guys wanna come to Petco? We're gonna get some fish for our dorm."
>turns out they were gonna do the same thing
>kek
>we pile in my car and I drive us to Petco
>on the way there, Cersei reveals to me that not only is Theon a stoner, he's a fuckboy
>dated her best friend, cheated
>actrighteous.jpg
>"that's so awful"
>agree that whoever wins, it can't be Theon
>return to dorm with fish
>Jaime waiting for us, grinning maniacally
>he has a plan

GRRM get back to writing GoT instead of fanfiction on Sup Forums plz

>RA has placed a sign above his door, saying that any more socks on his knob will result in a conduct meeting
>college speak for "go principal office"
>Jaime has a plan
>"dude, let's put socks on everyone's doors except the RA's"
>the gears begin to turn again
>Jaime spouts off some normie nazi memes trying to be edgy
>I phase him out
>I phase everything except the sound of my sweet, sweet victory
>"user....user?"
>oh shit
>I went into a victory trance
>"heh...yeah, let's do it!"
>fool
>I put a sock on my own door, then wait as they go down the hall, puttting socs on every door they see
>suddenly the door at the end of the hall opens
>It's the RA
>he's back
>I rip the sock off my knob and slam my door as they all scramble back into their rooms
>they agree in floor group chat to say nothing
>I agree to say nothing
>They see me as an honorable man
>A kind man
>a simple man
>but I am much more
>and I shall have my crown

>be lunch the next day
>I see RA sitting alone at a table
>phase1.jpg
>Walk up and sit across from him
>"Hey Jon, how's your day going?"
>"Not good user. Some fucker's been putting socks on everyone's doors."
>heave a deep sigh
>"Jon...I have a confession to make."
>He looks confused, "Yeah?"
>"I put a sock on my own door last night"
>"Oh. Well thanks for telling me, but did you put socks on anyone else's doors?"
>"No...but I saw someone."
>"Who did you see?"
>".....You can't tell them I told you..."
>"No worries user, I just want to know who did it"
>"...It was Jaime. And he had the help of Cersei and Ros. That's why half the socks were girls' socks."
>he sighs
>"I had a feeling it was them. Thanks user. I really appreciate you."
>"Anytime, buddy."
>I put my plates away and leave
>When you play the game of lounges, you win or you die

better than feast for crows so far

>snitch bitch
you gon get stitched

>get up to my room
>Tyrion doing homework
>Ned talking, "Do you guys think Jon saw me last night?"
>"Ned, you're going to be fine"
>This Ned boy, he is a good man. A fool, perhaps, but a good man.
>But to a good player, there are no good men
>Only good tools
>"You're gonna be fine Ned. You're gonna be just fine."
TWO DAYS PASSETH
>little bird informs me that Jaime has been suspended for a week
>Election is in three days
>good news
>but wait
>Cersei and Ros have been suspended for two days
>Two
>Is less
>Than three
>God damn it
>The old gods and the new, damn this turn of events
>Cersei may still claim my throne
>My rightful throne
>I shall smite her for this
>The day will come when she thinks she is safe, and happy, but her joy shall turn to ashes in her mouth. And she will know the debt is paid.
>when you play the game of lounges, you win or you die

Kek

>little bird informs me

Ķéķ

Can't wait for this to end with you getting your throat slit by the sister of the person you love.

Come on man, it just started getting good.

this thread

Valar Fapulis

>election day
>three days of my hard work
>this had better not go wrong
>Prior to election day I enlisted Tyrion and Ned to spread around a rumor
>This rumor was that Theon had been the snitch
>"Someone saw him talking to Jon right before Jaime was suspended!!"
>Jaime is very popular
>Theon is now guranteed to lose
>Sitting in election meeting
>Cersei gives her speech, thunderous applause
>Theon gives his speech, radio silence
>I give my speech, some reaction but mostly nothing
>I may not have everyone's support, but my loyal followers mostly operate in secret
>They cry out for their true king
>They drink secret toasts to my health
>I am ready
>Suddenly, Tyrion bursts through the door
>"HOLY SHIT GUYS, SOMEONE KILLED OUR FUCKING FISH"
>everything according to plan
>Jon rushes to my room, both my fish have been cut in half and thrown on the floor
>He immediately searches my room
>Finds a note underneath Ned's laptop
>"dear Ned, if you kill my opponent's fish I will fuck you harder than you've ever been fucked, Sincerely, Cersei"
>her signature heart above the I
>I've been stealing her outgoing mail for days
>learning her handwriting
>every little detail
>Ned is suspended for two weeks, he pleads with Jon, insisting that it wasn't him
>He was an honorable man.
>But he had to go.
>Too much honor makes for a traitor.
>Morals mean nothing.
>Nothing means anything anymore, except for the floor rep position.
>Cersei suspended for the rest of the semester
>loses 18 credits
>Thousands of dollars down the toilet
>I am named floor rep by default
>I name Tyrion my hand
>The crown is mine
>The lounge is mine
>When you play the game of lounges, you win or you die.

Thus ends our tale. Cersei came back at the start of semster 2 but was banned from any future elections, Ned dropped out and now works for his dad on a farm, sill keeping in touch with Arthur, his roommate, who still just watches anime. Theon is despised, as everyone blames him for Cersei's plight, and Jaime is back and more of a normie than ever, and me and Tyrion haven't gone to a single meeting since I was elected. It's good to be the king.

Op is faggot
Cut off his manhood and feed it to the goats!!!

fantastic ending to that tale good sir the gods smile on you

This
Also story is fake and gay
What gave it away was you called it a principals office
No college has principals, theyre called deans, typically DODs, Deans of Discipline

Also you cant be suspended for any misconduct thays extracuricular as youre all adults, unless it brings damages to the school or interferes with classes of any kind, you wouldve had to press charges or bring itnup to the DOD yourself

I can tell youre larping like in college but youee probs still in high school

Thanks for entertaining me for all of 5 minutes

Either way, even if all true, you sound like a pussy bitch, you couldve just had sex with these girls and been a normal fucking dude instead of a retarded autist who thinks some building manager faggot position was worth ruining lives
Go suck cock

tfw too intelligent

>The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
>Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact

This
Also story is fake and gay
What gave it away was you called it a principals office
No college has principals, theyre called deans, typically DODs, Deans of Discipline

Also you cant be suspended for any misconduct thays extracuricular as youre all adults, unless it brings damages to the school or interferes with classes of any kind, you wouldve had to press charges or bring itnup to the DOD yourself

I can tell youre larping like in college but youee probs still in high school

Thanks for entertaining me for all of 5 minutes

Either way, even if all true, you sound like a pussy bitch, you couldve just had sex with these girls and been a normal fucking dude instead of a retarded autist who thinks some building manager faggot position was worth ruining lives
Go suck cock