Okay Sup Forums, how do I have sex if I live with my parents?

okay Sup Forums, how do I have sex if I live with my parents?

checked. heres a hint from when i lived with my parents: the penis goes in the vagina

Grow up

Just have sex with your parents, problem solved

The easiest way user, is to have sex with your parents.

Do it outside or in a car
>preferably away from the folks

i have two mothers and I am a gay boy. It won't work. Unless one of them has a strap-on??

Sneak them in and out afterwards. Wait for your parents to leave for a while then invite them over. Do it at their place. Go on a trip with them and share a room. If all else fails you could ask a friend to let you use their room or you can rent a hotel room for a night. There is also public sex in a secluded area but thats not best for first time sex.

car is too small i need room and outside has bugs/grass/plants

Um, I convinced my mom to let my gf live with us at the time...

get a boyfriend who has their own place

Incest, obviously.

In your room with the door shut. What are they gonna do break it up, chastise you while they watch?

would if i could but am only child.

Put peepee in vagoo

no one on Sup Forums ever has sex regardless of what they'll tell you so it's really not something you need to worry about

I have never had friends over to my house so it'd be weird if I came home with someone

There is literally a first time for anything. Grow a pair.

Make her scream her lungs out without a fuck given.

Nice trips.
Other person has their own place is the easiest obvious answer. Car second but has been ruled out. A motel is the next best option, but can scare them off if they aren't used to going somewhere for the sole purpose of sex. This can be the ultimate option depending on where your relationship is at / how well you can pull it off.
>projecting
I don't understand how people project this much. Does it make you feel better to think that?

How old are you

Stop making excuses and start making it work instead, user.

Isn't even one of them plain enough to pass as a man? Perhaps you could get her to wear a mustache and top hat. Ask her to stop waxing her ass so you can make-believe she's a strapping young lad with a donut ring that'd make a Greek poet shed a tear.

Wait.. if you've got dyke moms, how are they not actively encouraging you to have gay sex at home? This calls their progressiveness into question.

You already have, think about it.

20

50 bucks can get you a day/night/day at an air bnb just download the app and look around.

>Fucking millennial NEET

naw

i also don't have money so I am fucked

>NEET kek

Just wait until your parents leave the house then?

If you seriously don't have friends who can let you go round' theirs when the chance is right, your only hope is to wait until (preferably) your, or her family is gone and do it quick. But If you don't have $40 for a hotel and some condoms, you should question yourself.

I am definitely questioning myself

have sex *with* parents.

>duh

>50 bucks can get you a day/night/day at an air bnb just download the app and look around.

then it will cost OP $300 to have sex, but at least he won't be bringing whores home to mom and dad

just give your mom $20
that's how everyone else has sex

Are your parents so Christian that they won't understand that their son is an adult too?

My parents understood this when I was a teenager; American parents are so pathetic sometimes.

I doubt you're from Europe.

can confirm am amerifag

If you've never had a friend come over I don't think you need to worry about your sex life user.

The solution is new parents because your parents want to make you gay.

Bang your mom. It's easier than you think.

it's too late for that

>constant threat of being blown up
or
>can't fuck people in my parents house
Wew what a choice.

>old enough to make the secks
>still living with mommy n daddy
kys yourself, clearly your parents did it too much and babied you into thinking you can be a grown ass man but still live with them.

milenials truly are the most degenerate and disgusting generation

You're that gay that you won't sneak some ass into your bed, but you'll probably sneak beer and bud.

Homo.

If your parents are anything genuine they will let you bring home some ass. Be alpha and get fucked while you have your only chance in life.

Get a job. Get some money. So when you wanna fuck someone, you don't have to worry about what your family is doing. You won't have to ask Sup Forums. You'll just take her to yours. Use it as fuel.

>Be alpha and get fucked
I want to be submissive and get fucked

Oh stop being a little bitch. If you're afraid of bugs post your ass

Outside has nature
And inside is a stagnant room filled with layers of dead skin and dream filled tissues.
Get over it or fuck at your boyfriends house.

If you're responsible enough and they trust you, ask them if you can have the house to yourself for several hours or the night cause you wanna have friends over for a small party. That's what i did, and even got brownie points when theyd come home and the house was still clean and i wasnt drunk high or hungover. This actually made them trust me more.

inside has carpet and comfy bed. outside is covered in shit and spiders.

Whens the last time you had those nasty ass carpets deep cleaned?
Spiders eat those other bugs you're crying about.

Dude what are you even trying to counter outside for? Throw down a fucking blanket in a place you know nobody ever goes. If you're willing to keep your virginity because grass is stopping you, you might be gay.

very good idea except
>Has never had friends over
>sudden party?
>nope

Me too

i live with my parents and always fuck. i just let them know i'm inviting a girl round and to knock if you want to enter but i give hints. then she comes round and we fuck in my room with the door closed and the music/tv on

You may be on to something...

Just ask them, maybe they're into that shit.

Parent left to England for 2 weeks, left me alone.
Praise from not having a wild party...
Months later my dad finds a frozen miller highlife can. And asks about it at dinner since it's not his brand.
Fucking drunks.
What a sausage fest too...

Just sneak her in bro

mom and mom

ftfy

Been there, except parents found weed pipes lol. My mom cried.

how can I attend sausage fests?

I think it's more like

>how do I live if I have to have sex with my parents everyday

Also check'd you abused lil' twat.

just like buy a tent and smash in ya backyard

>having sex outside

Have only friend, who's invitea his Yugeeooo friends to the party.
Also since it's not awkward atall only invite girls as if they can't see who else got invited.....
The one time my mom took a shower at night was the one day I had my frind over and didn't blow the bong hits out the window...
You smoking cigarettes!
Eww no.
Oemgwe marijuaWana. What did I do wrooooooong? Crying and told my friend to go home never allowed over again....
A great response to the kid with like 3 friends. Fucking parents.

Lastly most parents would have loved to hear their son smashing some chick.
It's the ultimate proof their kid isnt a faggot.
Or in your case... is at least slightly normie fir being sexual.

Get a job and rent a hotel room or an apartment.

I started fucking my mom after my dad died two years ago. The sex is great! Try it. Your mom is probably a whore from by-gone days anyway.

Go to her house dummy