Turning 20 in a bit. First birthday I'll spend alone due to living far from home. I mean it's what I always wanted...

Turning 20 in a bit. First birthday I'll spend alone due to living far from home. I mean it's what I always wanted, honestly. I'm an introverted fuck. Just seems weird that I can finally treat it like just a regular day. Anyone else know this feel? Also general feels/lonely thread

my mom always like to throw a fucking birthday party for me and she always asked what I want and always said nothing (literally I didn't want shit for my b day) can't wait to move the fuck out so I cannot celebrate holidays always treated my b day and everyone else's b day as just another day I ain't treating your ass any differently

I live 3000 miles from home and I have no gf.

Sometimes, life sucks even when you're making money.

I play pokemon go driving around all day to fill the void in my life if im not projecting my own insecurities and flaws on other people to make myself feel better. He really hurt my feefees. Poor nataly i thought you were only saying that to gain some pity from me but now i do believe it. I feel sorry for your wife and future kids. It would be better of if you just left them, its only a matter of time til you fuck up. We both know that.

But a regular day should be a great day.

You don't turn 20 everyday, in fact, you only turn 20 once (or any other age for that matter). I also enjoy being alone, but at least I celebrate my birthday.

You're just a day closer to death, so try and make it worthwile.

>sometimes
Kek

Lived away from family many christmases. Just another day. When it passes you forget it.

>be me 18 senior
>talking to girl
>freshman girl but looks 17
>after a bit of talking and her taking my first kiss
>she doesn't want a relationship I do
>whenever we do hang out always on her phone
>always talking to her guy friend
>never me I'm just kinda there sitting by her
>realize she's not the one
>don't feel that connection with her
>she just wants a fun fling
>no connection no spark
>been in this sad/pissy mood for a few days
>made out yesterday
>felt happy during the make out session
>right after it back in the pissy mood
>know damn well when cross country is over (where I met her)
>we ain't gonna see each other
>she doesn't wanna date or shit
>come to the realization I'm just gonna be this lonely faggot for a long time
>don't have the stones to go talk to girls
>hell I couldn't hold a conversation with girls if you had a gun to my head
>if I'm still single by January or February
>gonna enlist in the AF and say fuck it lets see what happens
>fuck college
>had a shitty freshman year so that fucked me over
>when I pick my bases just gonna put overseas
>and be away from everyone
>can't wait to enlist and get away from it all

the day I look forward to is the day I die cause it will all be over any worries, feelings, everything will cease to exist for me I'll finally be at ease with myself I lost my sense of care a long time ago I just don't give a shit about anything right now

I'm glad to be out my moms house. Rather be alone than have a party. I really hate parties. Now just dreading the phone call asking what I'm doing, and I'll say nothing

Almost a decade ago to the day I was spending my 21st birthday alone, first birthday where I lived on my own. I've learned life is what you make it m8. If you want to make it another day then there is nothing wrong with that. If you want to do something for it then that's great too.

Roll for you to kys

I feel you bro. I never want to celebrate my birthday either, it just feels weird for me when someone celebrates it with me

Im more motivated then i have ever been before to change my life and when i move ill be surrounded good people with a job opportunity i already setup thanks to you. Ill admit reading some of this hurt but the way i look at it now is you outlined and highly exaggerated many of my flaw, which is exactly what i needed. Im done i hope for your families sake you leave before you hurt them because of your natural self destructing ways. Tom the faggot for ya.

I'm an independent type of person so I can't wait to move the hell out and just leave everyone I know behind and start a new life

Life is full of disappointment, Jeeves.

Take a serious major and finish college. Anti depressants and therapy to get over you problems. Hit the gym to get confidence and ferl and look better. Do Not Enlist. It will solve nothing.

fuck college I ain't got the grades for it (2.9 GPA) and plus don't feel like paying out of the ass for 20-30yrs and plus I have nothing to lose in the military I already give no fucks, have no sense of happiness, they can't bring me down even more so fuck it

Then what are you living for? Just end it now, dummy.

Are you having a seizure?

Not every age is a milestone though. Also first heard that "just closer to death" quote from the George Lopez show as a kid and it really stuck to me

I drank a load of coffee and probably won't sleep. Pic for this feel?

the only reason I haven't offed myself is I just can't my parents lost 3 kids before me and don't think I haven't thought about it I eye my gun once in awhile but I just can't bring myself to do it so I'll join the military and die that way

Duuuuuuude where did you lost your passion for life?

Im not like you i havent bought the helium tank and hose reddit setup like you told me once long ago. I live because i know once i get out of this slump i can achieve far more then you have and at the same time not marry some girl i might a year ago 6 months after my girl killed herself. Are you buddy have your nightly xanax, idid.

You got no hobbies or skills, even a drug you really enjoy taking. The army is tough shit after a week you'll be so tired of marching, you'll make great friends if your social. Honestly thats the main upside, if you don't like people i wouldn't enlist..

I am having the exact same problem brah

going air force bud I like people who are in the same shit/thing as me so the brotherhood in the military is something I look forward to but I honestly give no fucks so the DI's can't really bust me down more all they can really do is piss me off at this point in life I have no one I always fuck up at one point with a girl and past experiences with a girl make me really shy/timid around them and it's really hard to open up to a girl and show my inner me (the part of me no one sees that actually gives a shit)

Sure, but setting "milestones" is pretty retarded, I mean, surely I was happier when I turned 18 than when I turned 14, but hey; it's still the day I was born so I'll celebrate it.

If you don't want to hurt your parents, and they've already lost other children, why don't you try and make them happy? That's a double standard right there. I'm pretty sure they wouldn't want their kid going to war after what they've been through

You are my favorite person in this thread.

I didn't drink any coffee. My anxiety induced insomnia keeps me up. It's weird. I feel tired the whole day, except when it's a good time to be tired. Bout to play some Oblivion until I damn near pass out. Only then can I sleep.

I'm actually enlisted AF and is the reason why I'm alone for my birthday for the first time. I didn't tell about my birthday. It honestly feels sooo good being away from it all, but as the other guy said it solves nothing, unless you truely cut ties with everyone back home, which wasn't my goal. Unless you hate everyone, you will miss them like a motherfucker. Also gl trying to getting overseas, fucking kek

Hey man don't feel down. You have an important job.

Celebrate every day. Every day you wake up is...well, fill in the blank.

That's a lot of optimism from someone posting on Sup Forums.

I can't take the loneliness/b/

Sounds like enlisting would do you some good. Just remember not all chicks are the same, some of them out there probably aren't too different from you..

my parents don't like the idea of me enlisting but they can't stop me and they know it they'll get over it

I'd cut ties with everyone but my parents I just can't do that to them but I won't miss my friends, classmates, or anyone I'm that person who can have best friends and do everything with them but also not miss them at the same time I'll do whatever the hell it takes for my ass to get deployed but I don't give a shit were I'm stationed anyway

the girl I'm talking to doesn't want a relationship to protect her heart cause she had a shitty past relationship so she doesn't wanna get hurt again I've had that happen to me as well but I still leave my options open

You're godamn right. I know I don't have to spend it alone, just that I finally as an adult get to. Next year I'll do something for my 21st.

Christmas seems more extreme to spend alone than a birthday..

I didn't, got big plans for the end of the year

My point is:

You don't want to kill yourself because it'll make your parents sad.

But you enlist in the army knowing they don't want that either.

If you really care about them, stop being so fucking depressed and make something out of yourself so that they can be proud of you.

Are you me user?

again not army, air force and they'll be proud of me joining the military I've been wanting to for years they may not like the idea but they support in it and they don't know I'm depressed but if I'm gonna die I'm go out with a bang or like a badass

You are an awful person and that is why you are alone on such a landmark birthday.

You deserve this loneliness.

Take this realization as an opportunity to improve yourself

>be me
>18
>very few friends
>none i talk to outside of school
>attractive but got no game so no gf
>been bored of everything so i spend most of my time sleeping or watching youtube videos and working out
>work out alone
>walk home alone
>only friend i consider family lives kinda far and works all day
>can feel depression setting in
man you gotta enjoy the little things in life and not take them for granted. honestly if im being real i probably let all my friendships/potential relationships die by going in to expresso depresso mode. where u from OP?

Closer to death my ass!
I'm in my 50's, you little fuck. I'd like to smack the shit out of you.

I don't ask for shit on my birthday, my family forces me to do shit. Good on yah bro.

stfu old man, no reason to be a cock sucker.

>be 12 years old
>did some boardline gay shit, really just clowning around with a stick
>friend prods me the ass with it
>tell him it feels good, joking around
>get him back later
>many years later post a tim and eric video randomly to him
>suddenly rumors start happening that i like it up the ass
>people dont believe it
>got an asshole friend, obnoxious piece of shit. gets his way, popular socially and everything. hears about it.
>he tells everybody. i mean every single person he knows or who i happen to introduce myself to in his presence behind my back. then jokes about it makes comments
>im almost never seen with a female because i was always thought as weird or creepy
> and now the rumor has gotten so bad that everyone is convinced that im closeted, bi or gay. not invited anywhere, more ammo against me.
>rumor eventually gets to the ears of my first
>sex was awkward first time and it was only once so shes probably getting her gears turned to think that i'm gay
>cant get laid in town or at all because of the rumor and plus since i'm older, everyone takes it at face value
much more to the story

How does that make me an awful person? I am by choice spending it alone. This is the kind of scrutiny I expect from society. And for that reason is why I feel guilty tonight. Guilty for doing something I want that isn't hurting anyone. And the point of this thread was to hear from other people if spending a birthday alone is normal. Also 20 isn't really a landmark compared to 21. There are no landmark birthdays adjacent to one another. Of course, just an opinion

thats crazy i was just thinking about how fucked it is that im turning 20. and if im even gonna celebrate

Take a dump on someones car, memorable birthday

Why not just go with it and tell people you're bi but convince them that you are really picky so you wont have to date any guys

I had to move out at 19 and lived with my aunt and uncle until my 20th birthday I moved out the day I turned 20. Everything since then has been great thus far I don't have to do shit anyone tells me to do when I'm at home.

From dallas. My best friends relationship is built on going into expresso depresso mode together. Though cant always be negative

because im not

and no girls want to date me if they hear that.

Exactly man, hate that shit.

As long as you have the choice right

Ohh poor OP turning 20 alone.


I'm fucking turning 28 next month and I'm still living with family. Ungrateful fucks.

user at least go get yourself a free coffee or something.

at least you have a family.

theres people who dont you ungrateful shit.

i bet youre a suburb white boy

...

If you Sup Forumsros had someone you talked to that made you both happy and upset, what would you do?
I talk to this woman, and I'm madly in love with her, at least more than anyone else I've met before me, but we've both talked before and she clearly doesn't feel the same way. Due to this I have some unbelievable regret and upset thoughts. She still makes me happy due to our friendship, but I've noticed that sometimes ignoring what we've had has made me happy too. What should I do? I imagine that disappearing from her life would make her upset as well. Something I also would not want. Deep down I want to go back to feeling nothing as i did before. What a rut to be in.