You awake inside an ancient temple

You awake inside an ancient temple.

Your head is fuzzy, save for the few things you remember- that you're an archaeologist, and this is your first exploration of the tomb of the great god "Fourchanus", and it has somehow gone terribly wrong.

Before you lay a set of four strange golden dice with many numbers and sides upon a concave stone table, a stone tablet above with information carved into it.

The tablet reads as such:

"Thou who have come into my domain"
"Thou art a fool"
"If ye wish for escape"
"hold aloft the heavenly dice of fate and throw."

"If ye land 01-20, death by snakes."
"If ye land 21-30, death by poison darts"
"if ye land 31-40, death by giant spider."
"if ye land 41-50, passage out of the temple with possible chance of catching a disease through the sewers"
"if ye land 51-60, death by soul jar, then reincarnation into your choice of animal."
"if ye land 61-70, death by undead snu-snu."
"if ye land 71-80, safe passage out of the temple with a hefty sack of gold."
"if ye land 80-91, Death by troll in the dungeons."
"if ye land 91-99, Death by Fire jets."

a special three layers beneath the possible outcomes are carved and embossed in gold.

"if ye roll doubles, Safe passage with plenty of rare gemstones"
"if ye roll triples, Safe passage with Gold, jewels, and many riches"
"If ye roll thy legendary quadruple, thou shalt obtain the legendary treasure of Fourchanus!!"

You approach the table with the dice carefully.

Your fate now lies in the hands of luck.

roll for snu-snu

I aint dying here bitch

I'm a rich man now

fuck

Throwing these odd dice, hoping for a clearance sale at Wal Mart.

Rollan for that sweet, sweet undead snu-snu

I'm only in it for the gold.

Sewers get

"Snakes? I hate snakes!"

Roller

I'll likely just die.

Make me a nigger

rolling

Time to finally die.

Roll ma men

ok

Roll for death by undead snu snu

Gimme gems

rolling for death

Goddammit so close

rolo

Rowing for glory

Archaelogists are fucking lame, kill me now.

Want that snu-snu

Dolphin if reincarnated.

ADVENTURE

rell

You got some jewels, dead man

Rollus kektus

fucking love gold

Indiana Jones is gunna ..

Roll