Gf is dtf but painfully vanilla

>Gf is dtf but painfully vanilla
>No fantasy, kinks, or any ambition/desire to be naughty
>Sex is boring AF
>She's not hot enough to make up for it
>Love her so damn much, wife/10 otherwise.
>I would never leave or cheat.

The worst part is that she's incredibly negative and closed minded about trying new things.
>"That looks awkward"
>"That won't work"
>"What's the point?"
>"Ew no"
is all I ever hear when I want to branch out of our standard formula. No joke, our sex is almost exactly the same every single time because "it's efficient"

I try to do things anyway, tease, extended foreplay, etc, and she's just like "what are you doing? Hurry up" and not in the cute "omg staaahp" kind of way.

She has so little imagination that she thinks that she, the non-masturbating, no porn, nearly kissless virgin before me, is the authority on sex because she's "better" than her lame friends.

>One is child-tier naive, literally dating a gay man and only has sex once a month. Doesn't really "get" sex, just does it because that's what couples are supposed to do.
>2/10 hamplanet that gets cheated on because although she puts out, she makes it so awkward and difficult that it's easier for her bf to get it elsewhere
>Hot but zero-sex-drive friend that stayed a virgin until she was 24 because she never had any desire for sex, not even curious. Still has only slept with one guy, long term bf that she made wait forever. Never orgasmed, hardly even knows what it is.

I've been dealing with this for years, I've tried just about everything that internet advice has to offer. I've pretty much given up and turned to porn/fapping when she's not around just to sate my own desires and giving her just enough D to keep her from complaining.

WTF do I do this isn't right.

Once she starts fucking around the other guys will show her what to do. Hold on user, it will get better. Once she starts trying freaky shit, you know someone else turned her out

kek

tell her honestly. tell her what you need.
if she is a good girl and worth it, then she will understand and change her ways... or at least she will try.
if she's not worth it. then she won't change for you and you probably will have to consider dumping her.

remember, being horny is not something that *you* can change for her. you can't become unhorny just for her. it won't happen. what will happen is that you'll be horny and resentful and maybe even feel guilty. don't be that guy. act soon.

Pretty much in the same boat here. When we were first talking she told me she loved anal, I got pretty excited about that, lubed it up and shoved it in for my birthday, got into a big fight because I was being forceful and kept trying... Apparently anal for her was tickling the bootyhole while she rides me... And that's it. And despite her knowing that I "take care of myself" when needed, she had a full blown melt down when she randomly asked if I watch porn and I told her that I did, as had already been established months before. Women... Gotta love em...

I've tried talking about it with her, and she literally doesn't get it. I mean, she thinks she's doing "everything already" and that I must not love her or think she's ugly or whatever nonsense. She's nearly to the point of crying when I'm just getting warmed up.

She genuinely believes (or at least acts like/has convinced herself) that she's doing everything that a woman should in bed, anything else is whorish or gross or fake.

libido can't be taught

abandon ship now or regret it later

what's the blowjob situation?

Its simple, bail on her. Get out of the relationship if it fucks you up so much that she is not open. I mean tbh it does sound boring as fuck.

OMG are you dating my gf?

I'm telling you fags now, just break up with her for a couple months. Single women are massive whores, how do you expect get to be a porn star in bed when she's had no experience? Let her go get some experience

Two minute, clueless and half-hearted. Never made me cum. Usually does it just before I put it in her, otherwise I spend more time jerking than she does sucking, then stick it in her mouth just to finish. She swallows without issue, but also without any kind of enthusiasm.

Shut up, Schlomo.

Also she only goes about 1/3 of the way down, lots of teeth.

>that pic

fuck you google

>be me, 32 year old virgin.
>be married 2 years. together for 6.
>she's horny but vanilla.
>lots of dry sex and fun early on.
>she's a survivor of sexual abuse in childhood.
>she can't have sex.
>she's going to therapy but progress is slow and emotionally draining for her
>we don't really do other types of sex that much anymore....
>i'm not sure if we'll ever have a "fun" sex life.

Don't know about OP but I've bee dating a girl for two years and I've had one. She isn't jealous or dramatic or anything, but the sex is beyond vanilla.

tru. while my issues with my ex weren't about libido, there were a few things that kept gnawing at me. the thing that finally got me to end the relationship was I couldn't stand the thought of being STUCK in a semi-happy relationship at 40. She may have good qaualities in some way, but if these are issues that you are STILL having after talking with her about them, just get out now. You'll thank yourself later when you find someone else who is just as good/better, PLUS has an open mind for kinky shit. Don't risk being stuck in an unhappy situation.

I mean like IDK how old you are but if she's not down for exploring kinks and stuff and sex is already a "task" or chore that needs to be done as quickly as possible, what the fuck do you think its gonna be like 10 years down the line when its the sexual exploration is the only thingh keeping the relationship exciting and fresh? get out now

bump becuase op are you me?

Stop being so weak dude. Don't ask permission for everything, man up and tell her "this is the way we're doing it tonight". Obviously don't rape her, just make her see that sex is give and take sometimes.

Doing things to her is not what I want. That I can already do, but her obvious lack of interest/enjoyment is such a fucking turn off that it ruins it.

Exact opposite problem. Gf gives some pretty good head for about 15 minutes and gets into it, but she treats cum like it's fucking acid which is a huge turn off. Cumming in the girls mouth or having to jerk yourself off while she awkwardly watches makes a black and white difference in pleasure/all around expierence imo. She's swallowed a few times but genuinely hates the texture.

Have you had many partners before her? Were they sexually sexually fulfilling?

Women become More sexual in their late 20s up to late 30s

this
She might even like it. if she doesn't then stop but then be honest that you don't enjoy sex with her. The way it sounds to me is that she's stuck in her teenage sex mindset where sex itself is a novelty and thus has no idea where to take it further.

topkek

Another one in the same boat here, user. Here's a pic of mine.

Seriously considering cutting it off. I'm finding the hot ones are shit in bed and haven't had to work for it and put the shame to one side like the average girls

Yes, not my first gf but my first love. She was a fucking roller coaster ride, we had perfect chemistry and got along like best friends from day one. We had a lot of great adventures together and I honestly crushed harder on her than I did/do my current gf if that makes sense. She just got my motor running better both sexually and non-sexually.

But she was also not right in the head and got worse as time went on. Ended up cheating on me and destroying herself with drugs and burning all bridges with family and friends.

I fully appreciate my current gf's stable and responsible daytime life, but if she could be just a quarter of the fun that the last girl was I'd be beyond happy.

Hey, maybe we'll all learn to accept that women aren't as sexually driven as men are...

Or you can cheat.

Honestly, I think even supposed "nympho" chicks are only into sex because it's an identity.

Look at nature for instance; from dolphins to tigers and deer, sex is only desired by the female of the species when she wants to procreate whereas the males of the species would copulate endlessly if they could.

My GF is very vanilla too. She makes up for it by being real laid back and cool, really into music, she's an athlete so she is fit, a great cook. She also owns a beach house, a 2600 acre ranch, a badass condo, a huge house in a nice affluent neighborhood.

this is the worst. I've tried my own jizz and it's really not bad. maybe a little bit of a chlorine taste but i find ketchup worse. When a girl gags as you cum it just makes me roll my eyes because they're so evidently putting it on because they don't want to look like a slut who likes cum.

What happened to her as a child?

>Not laid back or cool
>Not athletic/hot
>Not into music or anything really
>Owns nothing

Fucking dammit.

I feel bad for OP.
>college student at uni
>met gf 12 months ago
>started dating 9 months ago
>9/10 9 months, bumps but otherwise awesome
>shes not like crazy sexy, but shes cute and is dope af
Have good sex life, about to get a threesome for my 21st birthday which is exactly one month from today.

Dude she's hot and sends noods. At least you have that.

My girl is an average girl and I still have all these problems.

Then I would advise you bail my friend. 2 years in and it's driving me crazy

Wait for it my friend. She will probably be bored of you one day. Then cheats, tells you there are no feelings anymore or just leaves.

You are young, either the stuff mentioned happend or you won the lottery. But 9 months is no time.

The first years of a relationship are always great. It's the long term that might be a problem.

tl:;dr

just find a new gf, that is the point of dating. shes obvioulsy too boring and lame, find someone else instead of living in neverending frustration

it seems hard to imagine but you will be sooo much happier when you are with someone who is giving you what you need/want

Dude move on. My ex was like that, and she made sure I knew she felt so much more connected to her new boyfriend and couldn't keep her hands off him etc.

just do it, you will be so much happier. i was in the same boat. you dont realize how fucking bad you have it until you are with someone who actually cares. living in sexual frustration is no way to live user, just give her an ultimatum and explain how serious this is or find someone else. i think a lot of girls tend to brush it off casually like "omg he wants sex all the time lol" they dont really realize how much you need it. just be honest and tell her,b est case she starts tending to your needs, worst case, you go back into the dating world and find a chick willing to suck and fuck you every day. you will have a huge weight lifted off your chest

Well OP i understand you.

Had a girlfriend for 5 years that was similar. Great time, we werr a cute couple I would say, but sex was relativly boring from the beginning. She wasnt into oral?! that alone should have told me something was wrong.
I'm honest, I wasnt that experienced at the time, but hey. Everything was super vanilla.

Our sex life dried more and more, I wasn't forcing her and to be honest, i somehow lost the mood for trying, turned to porn too.

I mean your situation might be slightly different, but I think outcome of all the relationships will be the same.


Try to talk to her seriously and dont give a shit about her trying to avoid the topic. Tell her that it is a huge deal for you. Make it her problem. Bitches hate it if they don't satisfy. Tell her it's not her looks, but what she does in bed. She tries to make it about her looks, because she can't change em or is comfortable with them.

Good luck bro. Also there are other great women!

That's what I'm afraid of. I'm afraid that if I leave THEN she'll finally get it, and be 10/10 for the next guy, and I'll be stuck alone, every second of every day wishing I had her back.

Such a downer, isnt it?
Fucking leave her ass.

The point is you move on. The next one will also have flaws but

>it is about the flaws you are willing to accept with the good.

Ask yourself, would you want to continue this for 5 more years?

>>Sex is boring AF

HA HA HA the joke's on you!!

I'm virgin, and I don't ever get bored by sex

All other non sex things considered? Yes actually. Sex is the only problem. I know it's huge but the rest of our life is pretty good.

wtf i could have written this

What good is it then? Keep shit or see someone else having gold? Fucking get some gold yourself.

Same here as OP.
She tells me that she wants to try new things, but when I come up with ideas she's like:
No, that hurt.
Thats awkward.

Whenever I'm in the mood, she's not and she'll just lay there and be like "Can you hurry"

wtf am I supposed to do

Just cheat on her, user. You might think she is wife material but truth is, if she's so close minded with sex, she probably is with everything in general. Kinda reminds me of my gf, ignorant as fuck and doesn't want learn about anything, not even sex regarding. There are plenty of girls who are kinky as fuck but not whores sleeping with everyone, go look for them.

talk with her about how do you feel it, watch porn with her, and try some vibrator toys.

What it seems like is that she's insecure even if she says she's not. Fuckin talk to her about it yo. Get her to understand what you mean and where you're coming from. Tell her you're not satisfied and want to spice up the sex life a bit. Get her to just "try it" and see where it goes. Be passionate and gentle, but also assertive and in control. Hell, warm her up a bit, finger her/eat her out until she cums or is begging for your cock. I never knew how great sex could be until a booty call wanted me to tie her up and choke her.

Go slow, and buy lube and some aphrodisiacs and hot gels

be a man about it. tell her what you need, that her lack of passion is harming your relationship, and to be less of a bitch.

Same here, but shes all around my dream girl. Currently shes in med school and blames the lack of "fun" on all the stress, it was a lot better sex before she started med school, now its just rare and frustrating.

Same here, except no matter what there's always something else causing the "stress"

Nope dick er down every other week