How does Sup Forums wipe?

How does Sup Forums wipe?

fucking double square masterrace
try and argue you cunts

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Napkin Fold, what do I look like; a neanderthal?

Triple square gg eZ

what a fuckin waste of paper
2 is enough, just fold it 2 or 3 times

>not using W.A.D.

napkin fold

Double square for piss
Triple square for shit
Anything else is a mistake

baby wipe nigger!

you wipe your fucking dick after you piss?
how omega are you?

THUMB NIGGUH!!!

>not just shaking it
>kys

T H E P L A N E T O I D

Who needs paper

Mit

represent

>I make a thicc roll
>Dampen with a splash of water
>Wipe and repeat until clean
>Feels clean man

yesssssss

PREACH THAT SHIT

you wipe with shit water? nigga what?

ok nobody else pointed this out so i will

the only logical conclusion is

tits or gtfo

Who the fuck wads their toilet paper?

Different user but you don't touch the shit area of water you touch the cleaner area.

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what the fuck is wrong with you

You're retarded. Fr

civilized people you fucking scum.

Napkin fold for the bulk. Baby wipe for the remnants. This is the only correct answer. If you're not using baby wipes you have a dirty asshole and are a filthy human being.

>cleaner area

thats still pretty gross mayn

Like, that really made sense in your head? Then you typed it, read it, and it still made sense? Don't reproduce

>take 4-5 sheets of toilet paper
>pretend your making a thicc joint
>put a q tip in it
>stick it in your pooper
>move in n' out until you're clean
>to dispose, just push it up into your rectum completely so then you can use it again the next time you take a shit

How about no wipe and waffle-stomp?

Nice dubs

you need help...

i do the mummy
but i wrap my entire body in toilet paper then walk around and ask for candy after wiping
win-win
get to wipe my ass and get free candy

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depeding on how squitty the shit is, single or double square, and finish it up with some baby lotion on a triple square to be extra clean

the double square and the roll

Why do any of you plebs even wipe? It's not fucking sanitary and there will always be shit residue on and in your asshole with dry toilet paper, no matter how well you wipe. The best thing to use is a bidet which sprays a jet of water and ACTUALLY CLEANS yourself.

At least we're not indians.

kek, pajeets go straight into the lake

Eurofag detected...

napkin fold is the only acceptable response

Why add the extra steps of tearing and stacking them when you can achieve the same (and more evenly lined up) effect by simply folding them?

I'm American, Floridian specifically. Try again cuck.

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The wad

My niggers. The wad is the only thing that even makes sense. Why would you fold your TP in any particular way? Just grab a handful and go to town.

Lol'd at origami crane though.

After visiting Japan, there was no going back to smearing shit all over my ass with sand paper...

half of all japanese people are robots and don't need to shit

Posting superior toilets

wtf no you use water from the sink. If the sink isn't close enough to reach from the toilet then you don't do it at all.

i cummed

Bidets are cool and all, but if you think that shit is sanitary, you're ignorant and a nigger.

>Getting shit water all over your ass and end up wiping anyway....

8 sheets, fold twice, two sheets wide, 4 sheets thick, wipe, fold, wipe, and if necessary, and not too messy, fold and wipe again, otherwise, pull off 8 more sheets and get 2-3 more wipes out of them.

I get 5 sheets and fold them in halves instead of on the line

I'm from india
I use my hand

>the current year
>not using the 3 seashells

Perfect temperature, seat warmer, blow dryer and a deodorant dispenser.

You're a fucking animal..

A most satisfactory experience.

日本ハイテクトイレ!

I wipe with Super Wads and Super Folds.
My ass is big so I need it to be like that.

>Dumb nigger doesn't know how bidets work.

The water gets the shit off, without smearing and residue. The spray of water doesn't come from where the shit already is. That sounds much more sanitary than smearing shit all over your ass. The fact that this has to be explained makes me lose hope for you all. Holy fuck.

nope, put water in a cup

Hey, hot tempered child.
You're the one that needs explaining to.
But you're not worth it.
Kiddo.

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I think I have the same. Geberit 8000+

3500 bucks

under rated

We have big size washlet for America-kun also!

Why would I turn toilet paper into origami before shoving in my ass?
I don't know why, but I am literally crying from laughter.
Fucking shoot me.

>not wiping that odd drop (when in the comfort of your own home) so it doesn't end up in your boxers/briefs
shiggy

That just makes it worse, that means that you went through the extra effort to get a bidet

Why

Did you even try one of the others you pretentious piece of shit?

Well, since shit particles are not infinitely divisible, if every wipe removed a non-zero amount of shit, then the shit would all be gone after finitely many wipes.

Kiss my shit-stainless ass!

3 squares first pass
2 squares second pass
1 square third pass
Finger around ass last pass
If finger comes clean and doesn't smell, that means the job is done.

I used to use wad/super-wad, but then i had to pay for toilet paper and use double square or napkin fold depending.

I, too, wipe when I piss, and I have transcended Omega, I am ZETA!

>Gets called out
>Realizes he is wrong
>Calls user who called him out kid
>????
>Profit

i was arguing with someone yesterday about whether it'd be worse to wipe with fine grain sandpaper or tin foil. anyone have any thoughts on this?

It's just much cleaner.

If you have to deal with hemorrhoids this will help a lot.


Suppose you smear some nutella on a table. Do you clean it just why try paper or do you use water?
BTW there are much cheaper versions. This one air blower (which I don't use), heated water. 4 profile remote. Coal filter for the smelling.

I would rather be sanitary and spend more money than not be sanitary and spend less. Of course the same can't be said about you.

>not using baby wipes

Ya'll don't know

the mit is the best obviously, you can turn the paper around your fingers and use all of it

anyone else just roll it around their hand 3 times, break it off, pull it off hand and use it?

>uses a finger to check
you know you're fucking disgusting right?

>Not scooterbutting across the carpet to clean ones bottomside.

You fucking disgust me.

I know. I know very well.

Depending on the shit, I start with 2 or 3 squares, fold them into a single square. If it's not my favorite TP, then I turn one square 90 degrees. Too many TPs out there disintegrate and you end up with a finger or two going through the TP.
I wipe under my balls first. Then I continue on to wipe my ass cheeks before wiping my asshole. This prevents shit from getting on my hands as I wipe.
I still wash my hands though.

Wet wipes.

checked

Yet you might never know

you have to use a tablespoon, not a teaspoon as its too small to remove all the big clumps first. then use it to splash water on your ass before wiping with the mit

I double square as well.

I finish with a baby wipe after preliminary TP use

>Then I continue on to wipe my ass cheeks before wiping my asshole.
But you are spreading the shit from your asshole back to your ass cheeks by doing so.

two plys, make an eight corner star, pinch the inside of the plys to make a tulip, and then wipe with that.

The hillbilly. West Virginians and Kentuckians know.