Hey there, user. What's up? Feeling sad? Need a hug?

Hey there, user. What's up? Feeling sad? Need a hug?

Let's talk.

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can you please save my mom

>have you ever sailed across the ocean user?
>on a sailboat, surrounded by sea with no land in sight, without even the possibility of sighting land for days to come? To stand at the helm of your destiny. I want that, one more time.
> I want to be in the Piazza del Campo in Siena. To feel the surge as 10 racehorses go thundering by.
>I want another meal in Paris, at L'Ambroisie, at the Place des Vosges.
> I want another bottle of wine. And then another.
>I want the warmth of a woman and a cool set of sheets.
>One more night of jazz at the Vanguard. >I want to stand on the summits and smoke Cubans and feel the sun on my face for as long as I can.
> Walk on the Wall again.
> Climb the Tower.
>Ride the River.
>Stare at the Frescos.
> I want to sit in the garden and read one more good book.
>Most of all I want to sleep. I want to sleep like I slept when I was a boy.
>Give me that, just one time.

...

There is nothing that can take the pain away. But eventually you will find a way to live with it. There will be nightmares. And every day when you wake up, it will be the first thing you think about. Until one day, it will be the second thing.

Probably not. What's wrong with her? You're in a better position than I am.

What did you do to get it all in the first place, and what has taken the things you love from you?

It's Sup Forums. What did you expect?

It's not my quote it's from Raymond Reddington.

Felt like sharing it

Oh, you know, just considering suicide again. Nothing new.

Ah, that makes more sense. It's a good one. Thank you.

How seriously? What method looks best at the moment?

And why do you want to die?

Fairly seriously, but then I always tell myself that. Pills, the easy way out. Life is fucked.

Gf (diagnoesd w/ anxiety, depression, ptsd) had a depressive episode again tonight then nearly cried herself to sleep all while I was on the skype call (and still am). She also got really nervous because ptsd kinda makes her feel back in time, she'll get freaked out and worry that I'm gonna do what her ex did, or that I'm just gonna hurt her and leave.

Unfortunately, nothing new, just the usual.

How bout you guys?

also hey how's it going man?

Okay I'm early this time

Sorry to hear that man :(

I just wanted to say everything is gonna be okay. Things are tgonna get better.

Are you seeing a therapist?

Pills don't always work. You might end up dependent, or in the hospital. Nitrogen or a gun would be better.

How's life fucked?

Were you in the last thread? This sounds familiar. And difficult, and a little scary.

Hey Plun. What's up?

Yeah. It doesn't help. Thanks though.

why are you suggesting ways to commit suicide?

I don't have access to those. I have pills and alcohol available, or a rope, or a razor. Seems like an easy choice. My life is just fucked in general.

It's Sup Forums what do you expect? Compassion? Humanity?

Yeah, I was.
It is difficult.
And scary.
and that's just for me, I can't imagine what hell it must be for her.

but yeah it's me, same guy as last night.

I expected better from this kid, yeah.

Ah, a name for me. I like it.
I'm doing okay, I need to lay off the puzzle games though
Yourself?

Also where does this go

You will lose her sooner or later. I lost her when I was 6 and didn't understand death. You can't stop the cycle, so accept that she will be gone from your life forever. Cry if you feel like it.

oh thank you chink cartoon. thank you for listening to my concerns gook artwork.

It's mongolian basket weaving, and it's art

Why not?

My worry is that it'll end up hurting a lot more than you expect, and possibly leave you alive and crippled.

In general? Lost your job? Homeless? Family disowned you? Woman deserted you?

Life can get pretty bad, but usually there's still some hope if you dig deep enough.

I said it last night, and I'll say it again: I'm impressed. You're the man, user. You're very strong.

What puzzle games have you been playing?

(you are Plun, right? Am I thinking of someone else?)

I'm doing okay. Could be better. Had a stressful morning, but things leveled off at lunchtime and got pretty good during the afternoon.

You are vely welcome, stlange white man.

Ahem.

If you're going to kill yourself, I'd like to at least reccomend taking a stop at a psychiatric hospital. Worst case scenario, it doesn't help. But I'm sure they can help, or at least set you up with another support system that can.

It's gonna be okay

how does it help someone by telling them a way to kill themselves?

I miss her often but I fucked it up and don't deserve her...

Fenn

I just lost faith in things. It wasn't like one thing that triggered it, it was a slow burn of many things piling up.
What, and have them commit me? hell no.

>What, and have them commit me? hell no.
Yeah, god forbid they take efforts to stop you from offing yourself, right? Man, those bastards! How dare they?

>Found out today that my best friend is an autistic retard who throws a tantrum on the floor at the ripe young age of 26. That was a bit shocking.

If it can't work out you ought to stop thinking about her. This should happen in time, if not you need to meditate to purge her from your mind.

Lolwut? How did you find this out, and how weren't you aware?

vola?

Keep this on Discord, lest I turn to drastic measures

I'm not blaming them for helping mentally ill people and stopping them from doing it. But that's not my situation. Whatever, fuck this.

Thanks user!

What?

If they're committed, I can't stop them. Not gonna try anymore.

Just don't want them to mess it up and end up crippled, or dependent on something awful.

It's not about who deserves what, user. Are you sure you don't have any chance at all anymore?

user

I know how that is, but the feeling isn't nearly as strong for me.

Can you focus on the smaller things, and improve things that way? Take one little step at a time? I get the feeling that a lot of this is you being overwhelmed by so many things going wrong and being bad.

Embarrassing too, I bet. What are you going to do about it? Does this change anything?

Who?

>Not gonna try anymore.
if you aren't trying to help people, stop pretending you do.

Yep. 10 years ago I cheated on her. She moved and I am married. Pretty sure I'm never going back.

I haven't mentioned anything about the matter in here, but regardless of that, fuck off~!
If you're considering suicide, you have significant enough issues that measures need to be taken to ensure you stay alive long enough *for* them to help you, dear.
Discord.

Good

I've tried that approach, hasn't worked out. Not everything works out in the end, despite what people think.
You're assuming they can help me at all. They can't really.

I was committed for the same reason. It sucks and I stopped taking the medicine immediately.

Listen to me, I've been there and know the feeling. If you focus on if things are going to get better or worse, then that is your problem. No matter what happens, you are alive and that is something infinitely rare and very hard to understand. Throwing it away would be silly if it's over something trivial. You don't have to live life the way you are expected to live it, just be a good person and live in the moment. Shit will happen to you, that is life. Bearing it is something you shouldn't trade for anything in the world

Hey Fenn, newfag whose girlfriend left him is back. It hasn't been a great 24 hours, can I have a hug please?

thanks, I really appreciate it.

It just really fucking frustrates me that I can't fix it. More than anything in this world, I want her to be happy. She deserves to be happy. But I don't know if she'll ever be genuinely happy and I would give anything to make that happen.

It's not over something trivial, I assure you. Anyway I'll stop fucking up you guys' thread now sorry.

Mind telling me what the enormous buttplug stuck up your rear's about, boyo?
Who decided that? Certainly not a medical professional. Almost certainly you, the person who's considering suicide and thusly indicating a severe lapse in judgment and logical decision-making.

He seemed like a normal dude. He was a lot of fun to hang out with. He was my best friend and we did everything together. He had some cash and I needed to buy out of my lease and stay on his couch for a bit, and he agreed to lend me the money to do it so long as I pay him back, which I obviously agreed too.

But when I move in he has very weird rules he wants to set. "No masturbating outside of the bathroom." "Never gets to use the shower first" "Doesn't decide what's on TV" "Has to leave me an undated check with no amount on it so he can "Take whatever I want if you screw me over."

Then he keeps talking about how I am going to pay him back. And he keeps making up rules. On day 3 I set up my tattoo set *I do tattoos sometimes. It's a hobby.* It takes about 25 minutes. He is watching me do this. I'm even showing him my machine. I buzz it and he changes his mind. He doesn't want me doing it in the living room. I can do it anywhere else, just not the living room. I asked him why.
>"BECAUSE IT'S MY HOUSE MY RULES."
He get's INCHES away from my face, yelling as loud as he can, face, beat red.
>"WHY CAN'T YOU JUST DO WHAT YOU'RE TOOOOOOOLD. IT'S MY HOUSE MY RUUUUUUULES."
>I call in his room mate
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
He tells me just to move it to the kitchen to stop the tantrum. My "Friend" lays down on the floor, clawing at his face screaming
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WHY CAN'T YOU JUST FUCKING LISTEN?!?!?
He's calling me all the names under the sun
full on....exorcist shit. I tell him he's being retarded and set it up in the kitchen. He gets back in my face.
>"MY HOUSE MY RULES! YOU HAVE TO DO WHAT I FUCKING SAY! I'M DOING YOU A HUGE FAVOR AND YOU'RE DOING NOTHING FOR ME BECAUSE YOU'RE A PIECE OF SHIT BITCH! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE. I SHOULD FUCKING PUNCH YOU RIGHT NOW! REEEEEEEEEEEE"

then he ran into his room and slammed the door shut.

My name is Purin. Were you mistaken?

Hello.

Fuck those places but do try to get help. Just never admit you're suicidal cause they have to go all protocol on you. You can say everything else though, but when they bring up "Any feelings of wanting to hurt yourself or others?" it's gotta be a straight no.

Thank you.

Okay. I'm not helping anyone.

It's a bit long to be getting someone back after, yeah. Have you not moved on? Still stuck on her?

You're right about that. Some things just get worse and worse. Is there a chance that some of this will blow over, or change on its own? I don't s'pose it's much, but you might hope that eventually some of the problems fade and you can start to feel more normal.

*hugs you tightly*

Of course, user. Do you want to talk about it?

You're always welcome here, user. No problem is too bad or too small, or too difficult. I want you to stay.

Dunno, might need to abandon thread though.

Purin. Goddammit. I know a Plun somewhere too, I'm sorry. Bad with names. Now, were you the one with the ice cream sundae?

Hey fenn, z again, nerves frayed to death but otherwise I'm doing sorta alright

The burritos expired

I'm mexican and yesterday a lot of people died and lost their homes. My few friends seem to me worried about all those people but I don't care, I just want to stay at home and do the same shit as ever, to go out with them and don't give a fuck about others
Why do they even care?
They don't know any of those people
I was thinking that maybe I have a problem
>Why I don't care about anything?
During the earthquake everyone was on panic (I was on school, we are on the top of the building) and I didn't' give a fuck
Maybe because I knew that the only person that I care about was okay I didn't freaked out
I feel like I'm the worst shit because of this

Also I'm the one who was suffering because a girl was in love with his friend and him(me) with her

beautiful girl, state beauty pageant winner, 9/10 on a bad day, is into me. I'm 6.5/10 on my best day. gorgeous girl, smart, funny, isn't a slut, all the good shit. actual girlfriend material.

I had shitty abusive parents and have all sorts of mental problems. I'm massively insecure about nearly every aspect of my life but compensate well and I do well for myself socially. we're both seniors in college, both STEM degrees, both with good jobs. she's making it easy as hell to ask her out but I'm too insecure and beta. i have no problems getting wasted in her apartment with her and her friends or studying til 2 AM with her, we have great conversations, she invites me over all the time, but I'm too fucking insecure and pussyish to actually turn this into an actual relationship. confident I'll regret this when we stop talking but I'm a bitch.

I actually know exactly what this is like, since I live with an autist too!

I'm rational enough to make my own choice on the matter.
Too risky.
It's not going to blow over, no. Sorry again for bringing down the mood. I tend to do that.

It's alright, I'm easy to forget ;-;
And yeah, I had the sundae.

Well it has to be some Grade-A autism. "The good shit" Because I've never seen a full grown adult act like that. I was a pre school teacher, and I never even saw a 3 YEAR OLD autist act like that.

I know he has ADHD and ADD really bad. He's got pills for em and everything, so I know he needs those. But....what?

(is it you)

Like, am I honestly that crazy to think that if something isn't effecting you in any way shape or form, it shouldn't bother you?

I respectfully but strongly disagree. Especially given that the very prospect of your judgment being lapsed also implies that you wouldn't realize your judgment is lapsed. That is the very reason we rely on doctors, ie; a second opinion, to look after us when that is the case. And that's exactly why you *should* go to a hospital and, if necessary, be committed.

I don't expect pure logic to get through to you at a time like this, dear. It probably wouldn't get through to me. But I can do what I can and tell you that you shouldn't go through with it, and should seek help.
Yeah, those things are nothing like autism, and certainly wouldn't lead to behavior like that.

Idk if you remember but I came here the other day looking for advice regarding my feelings about being stood up. My suicidal thoughts have been getting a lot worse lately so I've made the decision to finally talk to my doc about it and see what can be done. As for what I have, either BPD or severe depression with a smidge of depression-induced anxiety. Problem is, I fear even on medication I'd still feel like a useless piece of garbage that isn't worth the space I occupy. I don't even know what kind of advice I'm looking for here, because I don't feel confidence in being able to change anything. If you have anything that could help me though, please let me know.

I didn't see or read the issue at hand, I did not mean to imply your problem was trivial.
Don't feel like you're shitting up the thread, that is your ever inquisitive conscience tormenting you for nothing. What is the issue? If you won't tell me, could you give me the scale of how bad it is?

What do you like to do in your free time?

Hi thread.

After watching tonight's episode of Ken Burns' The Vietnam War, My father recounted to me what he did while his father (the grandfather I never knew) was an officer and an engineer in the Army during that time, like polishing his boots every time he came home. He was never deployed, but to think if he did would likely mean that my dad wouldn't be here right now.

He told other stories this evening, but it's one of the things that mean the most to me: just shooting the shit with dad. When we were through with that I began to think how much time he might have left. The man's fifty, but also a cancer survivor and a man of action (hiker, former logger, did a shitton of stuff with the BSA) now falling apart from the inside out.

...it didn't help my feels when link related began playing on YouTube's autoplay. youtube.com/watch?v=8TL_oJL0r0U

Honestly, hospitals and such terrify me. The idea of being committed is even scarier. So I don't think I'll do that.
It's not like any one thing. It's a lot of things gradually over time. It feels a lot worse now.

Yes the sads are feeling me

see a therapist, then. you won't be committed, and everything (medication, etc) is voluntary, especially if you're of legal age.

Mm.. You know, I understand that as well! God, it would scare the hell out of me... But just because something is hard, doesn't mean it isn't the right thing to do, user. Honestly... Most of the time, the harder choices are precisely the ones you should make. And you only need to be courageous long enough to sign the papers, hun.

Fair enough. Good luck, user.

People have empathy and sympathy, user.
They can, and do, imagine the pain of others, and they feel that pain.

>In school
>Have to a project
>I literally have to read 2 slides off a power point
>Go up there confident
>Get like 3 words out
>Suddenly I'm shaking violently
>I seriously cannot get it together
>I can feel my face turning red
>The class looks really uncomfortable, confused as to why I'm so nervous
>Skip through the slides and then the rest of my group takes over
>Just stand up there in humilation for the remaining duration of the presentation
>The rest of class presentations go off without a hitch
>Literally no one else sperges out but me


I know no one else really cares but I don't think I can honestly go back into that class room again.

Already am. Just got on new meds even. They aren't helping.
It's really not an option. I can't go near one of those places.
Thanks.

But why I can't?
I saw some destroyed buildings and after that I was the same

give them time to build up, then see the prescriber to switch if they continue to not help.

It is. Believe in yourself. There is no, "can't". You can do anything you set your mind to.

I'm not preaching something unreasonable here. I'm not saying, "You could be an astronaut if you like!"

Of course that isn't exactly realistic. But this? This, you can most certainly do.

>but I'm a bitch
You don't have to be.

It depends on the hospital you go to. I work admissions at the highest rated psych hospital in the metroplex. The ability of a hospital to help a person is dependent on how good a hospital it is and how well the person is matched. Also inpatient is only for stabilization. To help you cope with the situation well enough to be able to make better decisions, stay safe and set you on a path to making a lifelong difference. That path just starts in inpatient, the aftercare is where "the magic happens". Also in most states if you sign yourself in you have the right to request discharge at any time. As long as the attending physician doesn't believe you are going to kill yourself or someone else if they release you, then they are obligated to let you go. Take some time to read up on hospitals before you make a decision. Anything above a 3star on google is going to be pretty damn good (remember reviews always tend towards a negative bias due to the nature of those perusing to review)

and now I'm gone *poof*

Which meds? I know mine took 2 weeks to take effect

I dunno Z, you don't sound so good. Do you want to talk about things? Have you pulled back on socializing, or tried to keep at it?

Dunno, you sound like a good guy to me user. Do others dislike you for your indifference to the plight of strangers? If they don't, I don't see anything wrong with it. Carry on.

Tomorrow, user. You're going to ask her out tomorrow.

Because this will be good for you, and good for her. Don't be afraid. You aren't going to fuck this up. You got this.

The mood here's always down. You're not making anything worse. I'm sorry to hear that, user. Wish I could do something for you.

At least you've got your wits about you, and aren't about to surrender them to anyone. You're a strong man, user.

I'm sorry Purin, I won't forget you again. See, I remembered who you were, I just couldn't attach the right name to you.

You're cute. Keep posting.

Look, you need to overcome that fear user. Nothing will ever get better if you don't even try. If you keep at it, there's a good chance that things will improve drastically. If the drugs don't help, therapy might.

Don't give up.

Art, basketball, stupid shit with transformers.

Used to do more of everything. Now I don't have time.

I have friends who have similar stories to tell, user. They're cool. They're falling apart.

Seems like the best people have the most problems. It's awful to watch such a great man crumble.

Any specific cause this time, or is the crushing feeling settling in on its own?

If you don't go back to the class, make sure you officially drop out or it'll drag your GPA down.

But I think you should. It would be good for you to face this fear and become stronger by overcoming it.

I believe you would hate being committed as I did. Please take my advice and understand your life is your own and you need not live up to anyone's standards. Life has been a bitch to me as well and I am a lonely, miserable loser myself but I try to make the most of this world I find myself in. I try to make the most of life, which is my only possession.

What does stupid shit with transformer mean?

Thing is, it's my third time taking the class. The first time I took it I dropped it because I had to do a presentation and avoided it all together.

The second time I fucked around too much and ended up with a D. Third time going through, told myself I'd do it no matter what. First presentation and it went about as bad as I thought it possibly could have.

Been seperated from the love of my life for 3 weeks. She keeps me around but every day I'm more worried she's a sociopath and I'm some sort of weird trophy to her.

I don't take meds but I make do. I don't mind being flawed, it reminds me I'm not a fucking drone.

Believe it or not it's actually not dealing with socializing for a change ^^ I'm just exhausted from being in the field doing "training" for so long because our regiment fucked up royally and are trying to make up for it.

Thanks for not replying Reisen ;-;

Thank you.
Unfortunately, I am growing tired, so, goodnight

what do you think about this picture?

I just want permanent unconciousness. To cease everything. My entire goal in life at this point is to outlive all of the people that care about me so i wont hurt them. Its just going through the motions until I watch all my loved ones die, then it's finally my turn.

I've switched a lot already.
No, in this case I literally can't.
It's really not something I can do for several reasons.
Zoloft

How are you seperated if she 'keeps you around'? And what causes this worry?

Can i save it?

Why is that?

Hey there, friendo. Managed to get the second half of volume two cropped last night. Only managed to get twenty pictures out of it, but I still think they turned out great. Got a few good thread relevant ones too. Here they are.

imgur.com/a/8jtIo

So how's your day been going so far?

fuck you op im fine

Yeah, I guess
I woke up today and was late for class. I failed my math exam because I was late, it was just a bad day. I guess that's what happens when you try to get up and do something eh? I asked the girl of my dreams to homecoming and she said yes, so I'm super fucking pumped