I really really need your advice guys.
I have a cupboard filled with custard creams and garibaldi biscuits and the police are doing a house to house search for assault confections.
Worst of all - I neglected to get my garden cleared this spring and the entire thing is FILLED with stinging nettles. They'll try me on a terror offence and they'll lock me away.
WTF DO I DO THEY'RE ONLY A FEW HOUSES DOWN AND THEY'VE ALREADY BUSSED OUT TWO DOZEN PENSIONERS
HELP HELP HELP
>Assault Cookies
Torch it mate, torch it all
You know it's funny because in my many years living abroad I met quite a few British people and they mostly seemed like top lads with the occasional knob tossed in.
How is it that your nation is such an utter repulsive disgrace? Have all the good men come over here?
FUCK THEY'RE ALMOST HERE.
I'VE FLUSHED THE BISCUITS I COULD GET DOWN THE LOO BUT IF THEY CHECK MY FREEZER I'M FUCKING DEAD
I HAVE A WHOLE SALMON IN THERE.
>Ban containers containing 10 or more cookies!!!
>Assault cookies
Weep for Britain nipbro.
The lucky and good were able to flee this shithole and go to better places.
Those without the good fortune to die or get ahead in this awful shit rat race are doomed to die a lingering slow death.
SEND HELP.
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well at least your biscuits look tasty
>he doesn't have a tier 3 assault fish license
Damn bro, put on your body armor and grab your AR-15.
Oh wait... you are not American.
Get on your knees redcoat, it's the guillotine for you.
>OI, BIN THAT BISCUIT, YA BUGGER
Don't be kooky, bin that cookie.
Also, I'm going to start making it a habit of finding and killing the ocksucking mods for this site, what a pack of faggots.
eat the nettles, flush the cookies
I'm stashing my family circle selection box under the floorboards and have a nettle farm in my attic.
On a scale of 0 to 1984 how fucked am I if I get a raid at 6am?
Best not risk it,
Bin that biscuit!
Oi! Make a run for it, ya daft bastard!
You should beg jamal to come over as fast as possible, before they come through you door you should start prepping him, if they see you do the great british duty as they come in, they will leave you alone.
Convert to islam and declare yourself a Shariah enforcer. Your new mayor will protect your rights to bear biscuits of mass consumption.
>british call cookies "biscuits"
Hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahahaha
What the fuck you bongs
> Jersey flag
what?
>eat cookies
>drink nettle tea
so, i regularly consume deadly weapons.
get at me, weaklings!
>mexicans call themselves "people"
Hahahahaha hahahahaha hahahahahaha
What the fuck you spics
yeah your right we were the lucky ones
What do you mean what?
Don't let them in your house. Barricade yourself.
Shout
>I GOT DELICIOUS COOKIES AND I'M NOT AFRAID TO USE THEM!
Go down fighting, m8. Live hard, die hard.
>Canadian PM makes a public speech to beg forgiveness for """hiting""" a valiant and brave woman
Hahahahaha hahahahahaha hahahahahaha
What the fuck you leafs
Hahahaha, silly English speaking English. Don't they know how to speak English like an American?
>"banter" from a third world shithole
>Can't handle the banter so I insult
Surprised you did not posted it at Twitter leafy
obligatory
>implying there's a difference between banter and insults
>mexico confirmed for can't handle the bantz