Ask a barista anything

Ask a barista anything.

Eat a dick, please?

Do you smell like piss? I've heard that gingers do.

No I smell like desperation and dead dreams. It's similar to piss, but not quite piss.

>barista
>starbucks

please, mate

It's the job title. I still understand very little about coffee other than you push the button and espresso comes out

should have said "starbucks employee", no need to confuse people

Why do you have a haircut like a dyke?

WTF is a barista? You pour coffee, your official title is coffee bitch.

Regulations

How much money do you make? How many hours a week do you work? Do you enjoy your job?

10 an hour
30 hours a week min
Yea, it pays medical bills, and requires minimal effort

Eat a dick, ok?

Why

Do you get free coffee or food?

is starbuck's health care high quality? what about other benefits?

I work the same job, just at a fancier location.
It fucking sucks, i hate my job.

Mange une coque, svp

Why does your guys coffee smell so good but taste so fucking weak?
Also curious if you get free coffee or food or at least an employee discount?

Tell us some horrible customer stories OP

30% discount all coffee you can drink at work

>Free degree through Arizona State online
>Meh health, I'm on blue Cross blue shield through the VA and it's a hell of a lot better
>Free Spotify account
>Gold card status

You got red on you

What are your career goals?

The best analogy for Starbucks is taking gas station wine and pouring it into the nicest bottle you can find.

It's weak because it's shit house coffee that is dressed up as some premium artisan coffee.

We get 1 free food item, and unlimited drinks while working

30% discount when not working

I know, Its the early stages of pixel face. Doctors say I should be fine as long as I keep faggotry to a minimum

I'm leaving here in three months to transfer to another college and pursue a double major in computer science and systems administration.

Probably gonna off myself after working for about 50 year as my family has a history of dementia

>double major in computer science and systems administration.


Oh man yeah... Might as well keep your current job. Nah just kidding. Good luck

Damn thats lunch budget scratched off to your daily expenses. Sweet.

Huh, always wondered. The few times I have had starbucks the coffee is just bad. I would get an americano with 5 shots. Not really into the 3700 calories super sweet drinks. Just coffee, cream, sugar.
I have found the the small independent coffee stands sometimes have some amazing blends. My fav is actually is bikini barrista stand that has this god tier blend. A couple of the girls that work there know how to make coffee. My usual there is 8 to 10 shots. It's like a cup.of heaven.

Eh not bad side benefits ofc free coffee is like top 5

Why is your job so gay?

Everyone that works here is

>medical bills
lol unlucky living in a shithole country that doesn't give a fuck about you and only wants your money

>it's similar to piss, but not quite piss
Think about how stupid your answer is in relation to the question asked... Fucking faggot.

OP is a faggot

Why are hipsters such pretentious faggots?

How?

Did you know the Melbourne coffee scene is perhaps the best in the world?

I like frappuccinos but I hear baristas hate making them, do they despise me? I only get them during off hours, like 2pm

Why is it that the fat ones shave their head instead of covering their double chin?

It's a false sense of self worth. They feel they are better than you for no real reason.

Don't have a double chin

No, it's literally no more work than anything else. People are just lazy cunts. The only way I will hate you is if you order 5 things and change all 5 after we have made them.

Do you put cum in the coffee instead of creamer

Only if requested

What's with the faggot hair cut. If your male you look like a fag, if female your total dyke.

Can we see your cock? Love gingers

Is the order a rabbit?

What is the square root of 732.4?

Why do you look down on me for ordering espresso?

We don't 90% of our drinks contain espresso.

Show us your fire crotch

Fellow Barista-fag here. "Coffee Master".

The reason Sbux coffee smells great and rastes weak is because those are the exact kind of beans we use. Specifically, Arabica beans.

There are two main coffee bean types, Arabica and Robusta.

Arabica have deeper flavor profiles, which depending on roast time and blend, can create various tastes and aromas.

Robusta beans on the other hand, are fairly bitter, and don't have as deep a profile, however they boast almost twice the caffine content as Arabica beans.

The longer you roast a bean in general, the more oils are extracted from the bean and the deeper the flavor profile gets, but conversely, you lose caffine content.

TL;DR, the tastier your coffee, the less strong it will actually be, in the most general terms.

Also: we hate Frappuccino people in general because it's barely a coffee drink. It's blended sugar milk with a bit of espresso in there to call it coffee and gice it some color. Also, certain Frappuccinos have a retarded number of steps, especially the layered whipped cream ones they do in summer.