ITT: SHARE YOUR SECRETS AND SUCH

ITT: SHARE YOUR SECRETS AND SUCH

bumpp

I kill people and I don't have any feelings about it except for love.

One time I ripped the tag off a mattress at the store and never got caught

>Be me: 17, popular in high school, play sports, lots of friends
>Dork in my HS is into computer games, Sup Forums, and drawing. He used to call himself Jamie, but when we started HS he announced to everyone that he wants to be called 'J.R.', since I guess 'Jamie' was kind of fem-sounding.
>I don't like this kid, so I just keep calling him 'Jamie' every time I see him. He kind of gets irritated, so I so it more and more. One day he threw a bit of a hissy fit and said something like "Dammit will you please stop that!" That was over the line for me...
>Start to stalk this kid and harass the shit out of him every time I see him.
>Get one of my gf's to msg him and tell him she like him. He buys it. Get her to invite him to a party. He comes.
>We all start laughing at him, calling him a loser, and I start putting the beatdown on him. He's pretty big, but he's a wuss and won't even fight back, so he gets his ass whupped in under a minute and starts crying.
>I finally grab him by the hair, and take my dick out in front of his face with like 20-30 other people watching. I tell him he's gonna suck my cock or every guy here is gonna kick the shit out of him.
>He actually starts to open his fucking mouth! He was gonna really do it.
>I then SMASH him in the head and some other bros, throw him out of the house.
>Bad news: my hand is now broken.
>My dad is a lawyer, so we all agree on a story that he came over and was stalking the girl he came to see, we defended her, and he attacked me. My dad threatens to sue, and his dad winds up paying $1400 to my family, about half of which my dad let me keep.
>4 weeks later I beat the shit out of him with my cast. He does nothing.

I want to be a hero and save the entire world

damn nigga...

I was drunk one night and cut through the park trying to get home. I got jumped by two junkies in the park and sexually assaulted. All I could do was take it.

save it from what? how?

Save it from niggers

He's now a janitor on /r9k/

Me too user. I am trying to be the strongest, kindest, smartest, most loving person in the world in order to be a hero that can save the world.

What are you doing to actually become a hero that can save the world? Just curious.

...

I make fun of people yet I'm an insecure faggot that self harms.

One time at 7/11 I took a penny out of an ashtray and never returned it

I was diagnosed with HIV two months ago and I haven't told my wife.

My wife requires me to keep a butt plug in whenever i leave the house

I once had the door held open for me and didn't say "thank you."

I'm cheating on my pregnant wife with the hottest piece of ass, kinkiest chick I've met in my entire life. We're into gross shit and I love it. Whenever wife wants to fuck in a blue moon, it's plain missionary. Can barely get hard for her fat ass anymore. Pic related.

>Kid beat me up in High School, then I went on Sup Forums and made up a story about how I ruined his life to make myself feel better.

I'm stalking my ex girlfriend from high school. I'm not going to do anything dumb or violent. I just like watching her.

I used to be a manager of arbys. Every now and then I'd steal some cash. I'd blame it on a new guy. I did this 3 times. I ended up getting fired because I fingerbanged a slut.

...

Just bad guys i guess, world ending type shit included. i dont even want shit like powers or what not,i want just to push my limits and break past something extremely harsh or difficult and become stronger from what i did
>What are you doing to actually become a hero that can save the world? Just curious.
Right now nothing except keep my body in shape and take any opportunity to do something that could help me become stronger somehow.

I wouldn't even need people to recognize the shit that i do i just wanna do hero shit and know that i did it.

One time I was driving up to a stop sign, I looked to make sure no police were around and I went right through it.

I used to work at McDonalds in high school. I was considered to be the best and most capable employee (I'm white) so I got to work the drive thru window. During the summer months there are so many people who drive through just wanting something to drink. Many of these people will pay in exact change. Instead of entering the transaction in the computer I'd simply pocket their exact change and give them their sugar water at McD's expense. I'd make an extra $30-40 bucks a shift doing this. I've never felt guilty. Our store had a policy that employees drink for free all during their shifts.

You realize that even if that's true

you're now the triggered idiot who was bullied in high school and felt the need to respond right?

Very insecure about small dick

Maybe your dick isn't small. Maybe all the vaginas are gigantic.

how small

I've got a secret
The time has come at last to throw away this mask, now everyone can see my true identity
I'm Kilroy!

Because my story thread was a bust here's the screen shots because it technically was a secret until now.

Part 1

Part 2 (end)

Not micro but less then average

I'm insecure about my dick even though it's 7" and thick. Porn is a helluva mindfuck

Sorry to hear, you should make sure that your toungue game is undeniably the best

>married with kids
>in love with another woman
>sleeping with that girl's best friend

You sir are a David

Doesn't seem to equate for me

someone start a andy six thread please

that is a pretty vague range..

I don't know what that means

I wonder what Thanksgiving is like at his parents' house? He pushed potatoes across his plate as his uncle asks,"So Andy, are you still in that band?" Andy answers,"Yeah uncle Joe. I'm still in the band." Andy's mom feels like she has to explain his look to all of the relatives by saying,"He's very artistic and creative."

Had manager
He was man whore
Name was David
Fucked lots of chicks in similar situations

Doesn't matter how small your peen is i can confirm that if you are about to fuck a girl and you have a 3 incher pincher that they will roll with it.

They wont laugh and leave you blue balled but they might tell their friends.

imagine if you were about to fuck a girl and her clit was huge, are you going to be weirded out and walk away? fuck no.

I'm planning on killing myself when I turn 35.

I beat the shit out of some kid on my way home from work a couple of weeks ago. There was a lot of stress leading up to that moment, and was honestly one of the worst days I've had in a long time.
>woke up to gf screaming about me not doing dishes
>after doing dishes i went to iron my clothes
>iron broke
>my dog pissed on the rug
>as i was walking out the door i experienced the phantom step on my porch and fell
>walked to work
>my coworker was supposed to do some paperwork but he wasn't there that day
>manager pushes it onto me
>someone took my mug
>on the way home from work
>bunch of teens sitting around a bench smoking and cat calling every woman that walks by
>guy calls me a faggot and slaps my ass
>drop my suitcase, took off jacket
>walked over to him and decked him in the jaw
>threw a couple more hits and walked collected my things and continued on
>other teens laughing at the kid who is crying
>smile for a moment
>walked through my front door
>gf screaming because the router stopped working

My favorite recording artist is Vanessa Carlton

You're unpleasant. That's why your life is unpleasant.

You won't get what I'm saying until you're older and your life is worse. I'm sorry that I can't get through to you.

That pussy better be BOMB af

MAKING MY WAY DOWNTON

Walkin fast

50 for me

I'm gonna probably "trip" on the stairs when I'm like 60 and sad about all my old friends who are gone

Still moving in with my BF.

Came back today, found out i've been broken into 3 times in a week.

>23 years old
>all my friends from highschool all moved away
>no one left
>no one talks to me at work
>overhears people telling stories in the break room
>gets depressed because i no longer have anyone to hangout with
>coworkers think I'm weird because I'm always by myself
>they now avoid me leaving me no opening to make friends
Im lonely, what do i do?

I’ve wasted 30 years of my life and have nothing to show for it.

you kinda lead a shitty life, user. any positive shit going on?

You're fucked.

You know those old sad 40+ year olds working shit jobs.

That's going to be you.

Getting better jobs is all about good skills from colleges or people you know.

You're a failure at ambition and charming people. You're fucked.

You're on your fucking way to being an old sad janitor.

Bump

>me 26 come back from a week away for work
>balls aching to burst
>annoying as fuck ex at the time blue balls me wanting to go to a club
>i cbf im gonna go to bed
>get stuck at her house having to watch her sister and her two cousins that are staying for summer
>hot as a motherfuck
>sitting on the couch at about 9:30 struggling to stay awake
>one of the cousins comes in in a loose nip slip and lays with her head in my lap
>looking straight down the slip and no panties on either
>wellthereitiscantstopthisbonerfromcominon
>try to stay cool
>she must start to feel it, starts massaging the back of her head and hair into my hardening cock
>fuck... ah wat the hell
>casually slide a hand down the front of the slip and start teasing her nips
>shes feeling it, mm'ing and in one smooth motion she moves her head out of the way pulls down the front of my shorts and my cock springs free and fwaps up into my torso
>she pulls it down with skill and it goes straight into her mouth
>after a couple of minutes I'm barely keeping it together
>Im gonna cum if you keep going
>she says with the cock still in her mouth "i want it all, cum"
>we lock eyes and I cum fuckin hard
>im keeping her steady telling her to swallow evey drop and drink it all
>she gets up after and dabs at her lips and says "mmm delicious, goodnight"
>pretty much pass out on the couch like that
>wake up to gf drunk as all fuck pulling my cock out and getting me going again
>time for round 2 baby

Shit user fuck

Im working an office job that pays $27 an hour with 50 work weeks. I'm starting college next year, just needed time to save up money.

So i have that part down, just social life is fucked.

When you get to college find a group to hangout with, it's that easy. Just talk to people you dingus

closet bi fag here, I havent really done anything overtly sexual w/ another guy but I would love to. there are 2 guys in particular id like to do something with. I really enjoy showering with other guys, which I do pretty often.

Talk about shit that never happened

The world is beyond saving friend. The only thing you can really hope to do is fuck it up so much that it fixes itself

the cousin was the one and only adolf hitler
theres something that never happened

That's more plausible

In elementary school i got so mad at this kid called ray i picked him up my the throat with one hand and i literally saw red which probably is why my eyesight is so bad.

After that felt like i've become super strong over time and i've only gotten that mad one other time but i can't remember what it was about.

I eat my sister's ass/eat her out whenever she visits.
We've been doing it for several years, and no one knows about it except us. I even have a gf, and my sister is married, but that doesn't stop us from fooling around.

Just finger banged a chick for the first time and on my birthday no less.

Feels good, man.

I really wish there was, bud.

I suppose this is positive - my bf and I are now a team, and we're getting along great. Had sex like 4 times this past week.

Eating girl ass is patrician tier. Dive into this one whenever possible

I'd dive into that ass

Im about to go to the university to study aerospace engineering

Im fucking terrified, it excites me but i feel like it'd be too much too me, but i also feel that if i choose something else i'll regret it

Oh boy, this seems too damn goofy to be a fetish.
"You know what really turns me on? Eat me with your ass"

If only you knew what horrors you'll find.

There was a storm outside hail and rain were hitting my window. The house started to shake about a minute later and I hear the tornado sirens going off. I got up and out into the hall way and tripped over some pictures that fell off the wall and cut my foot on glass. I was trying to crawl to the stairs I saw my brother. He picked me up and ran me down stairs to the basement. He put me in the cornor while the house was shaking and the floor boards were starting to come up. He ran back upstairs to find my parents and he got knocked back down the stairs by the wind. He crawled over to me and held me tight. The lights went out and I felt like the tornado was right over us. He covered me with his body and pushed me forward on to the concrete. He pulled down my pjs and began pushing his cock inside me for the next 30 seconds or so and then cumming inside me. He pull up my pjs when he was done and kept holding me til the storm was over. He walked up stairs with me to find the whole top part of the house was gone and we could not find my parents. I could never look at him the same. I was thankful he saved me but after what he did when the state picked us up I asked to be put into another foster home and never saw him again.

Ive showered with a 9yo girl quite a few times lately

What the fuck. Who cums that fast?

Yup...

My brother I have disowned apparently. I assume he was to scared or w/e but I just hope to never see him again.

after a long thought, I realized I had no secrets.

sure....

I was an actual paid shill on the past US elections.

>AMA

For which side?
How did you shill?

You MONSTER!

Trump
Posting memes on the_donald, Sup Forums and facebook.

Did you get paid well/how much?
Seems really easy to shill on sites that were already voting for trump 2/3 of your post.

I'm still completely in love with her and I think about her every day
she just changed her profile picture to one wearing a bracelet I bought her for her last birthday, with her new boyfriend
dudes I'm hurting

I've seen 2 murders in my life.
Been to 4 mental wards, 2 choosingly. Same time I was able to leave all 4 the second I wanted to, cause guess what, you can fake being normal really easy just as easy as faking being crazy, hence twice choosingly went to mental wards. Had really bad family situations and it was literally only way to get away from it.

Once had gay sex just to prove I wasn't gay to people cause internet and Sup Forums ideology made me assume it was the norm. It's not, it's weird and not as great as tits.

I once convinced a girlfriend to kill herself and she did.

Thats about it for major secrets top of my head, feel free to ask any questions. I now work a stable job and live a healthy life for past few years

My 20 year old daughter lives with me. I'm putting her through college. Two secrets, I started having sex with her when she was 12, still do. Second, she is also my half sister, had regular sex with Mom from my preteen years until she hit menopause, that is around the time baby sister/ daughter took over. For some reason, I have a hard time keeping girlfriends.

this is a place for secrets, not for fantasies you pathetic idiot

50 cents/post, up to 80 bucks/day, doesn't sound like much but considering i was going to shitpost either way it's ok for me.
Sup Forums probably, reddit and facebook were leaning to liberal side, we changed that.

I had sex with my dad and he gave birth to my uncle who happens to be my sister. Also im my dad.

President Trump, is that you?

I'm in love with my best friend but she's seeing some one. I fool around with other girls but I always imagine it's her.

you on treatment?

bmpp