ITT: lame, unspectacular moments of your life that you still remember for some reason

ITT: lame, unspectacular moments of your life that you still remember for some reason

>be me 17m
>drop pickle
>is all full of dust and hair
>rinse it off
>eat it anyway

welp

Other urls found in this thread:

kcra.com/article/25-year-old-man-stabbed-in-modesto-dies-from-injuries/6420818
mercedsunstar.com/news/state/article3249673.html
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

>be me
>8
>see clown at a local store
>clown asks me to go there
>he wants to teach me how to knot a ballon animal
>start crying and go away
>clown looks sad
>feel bad for the following weeks because i have hurt his feelings

lel

kinda reminded me
>12yrold me
>pretend to have hurt my toe
>yell dad to look at it
>dad kneels down
>looks kidna happy to help out
>kick my toe almost full on in his eye
haha!
>dad is not ammused, dissapointed
>goes away

ayyyye :[

because I deeply hate myself as a person because I'm such a worthless piece of shit I repress most past experiences and live just in the moment. I'm just a shell of a person at this point tbh

nice dubs
but you still remember some random worthless shit for no good reason

cringy one:
>be me around 15
>have this light patch of hair on my head, rest is dark brown
>cute grill points it out to me
>say "it's like, you know, when a horse gets injured, sometimes the spot where the cut is will have white hair! haha! maybe I got hurt there, haha! same thing maybe!"
>she looks bewildered
>somehow escape the situation
spend a week cringing hard thinking about that when i go to bed

I probably had too much of those moments to be able to recall a single one of them. every interaction I ever had (which was a rare event to begin with) with girls was awkward.

then share any of those stories

I once mistaken my uncle as my dad. I was very young, like four or something, but I still hate myself for it.

The only time I actually sounded normal when trying to talk to a girl, she acted really awkward and asked if I was into to witchcraft. I can't win in this cruel world.

>be like 2 years old
>watching Thomas the Train
>shit's my jam
>episode where James gets stung on the nose by a bee
>face goes red and eyes spin around
>I still have nightmares about that episode a little over 20 years later
I don't know why I remember it so vividly, but I'll never forget my sheer terror at seeing a train be stung by a bee.

>stomach has been hurting
>weird kinda hurt
>can't sit down without severe pain
>go to bathroom
>produce Andy Six tier log
>blood everywhere

That's when I took a shit that ripped my anus

Oh boy
>my dad and his four brothers are basically identical
>family get togethers are fucking weird boi.

>Be me 16 years old
>Get possessed
>Convince a bunch of people to poison themselves with deliriant before exorcism

It actually wasn't that interesting on my end in retrospect, except one guy turned into a murderer, another killed his parents, the rest are just crazy or drug addicts

> be me
> be quite young / child
> playing outside with younger brother and one of his friends
> standing in garden looking around
> my brother's friend approaches
> raises his hand
> puts finger into my mouth
> WTF
> immediately goes deeper to my back teeth
> All of my WTF
> emergency mode activated
> close my mouth/teeth with the force of 1000 suns (involuntarily)
> success
> finger gets removed from my mouth
> FINALLY!
> brother's friend begins to cry because of damaged finger
> parents start to bitch at me because I bit him
> WTF. He put his finger into MY mouth
> WHY???

> "he wanted to see if you already lost your milk teeth"

>thomas the train
>milk teeth

wat

>into to witchcraft
lol
you can't walk out of that conversation without cringing. not bad feelings for that.

Just to add to the story, Dad was a Jim Jones follower who showed up late to the sacrifice cause he was stoned out of his mind selling bud to the Grateful Dead, part of me thinks it was Jim Jones who possessed me

> (You)
>>milk teeth
deciduous teeth, primary teeth, baby teeth?

Reminded me too

>10
>in bath
>"im gonna prank me mum"
>make some random splashing noises
>go silent and lie head down in the water
>mum comes in and sees her worst fear come true
>get up and yell "got you!"
>mum walks away and starts crying
>still feel guilty about it to this day

nightmares ...

>12m watch tevo at around noon in '99
>random report on a parachute accident
>one guy got entangled with his parachute
>free falling fast
>other guy is already almost on the ground
>in comes the entagled guy, as fast as a rocket
>unconscious and his arms flapping at the side of his body
>hits the other dude mid-air, cutting his feet off just by the speed of his arms hitting him
>pink cloud of blood after collision
>nightmares of these images for weeks
thanks, tevo! great shot during the day

all my WAT?

>wanted to see
>with his fingers
lel

i got the teeth reference i just laughed reading it

basically did the same
>came home from judo course in the evening
>in cloakroom
>dad is in hallway
>lie down straight on the floor
>dad sees me lying on floor not moving
>startled, runs to me in shock
>I just did it for no particular reason
>maybe was tired
>dad is completely freaked out for several minutes

sheeeyt

Thats what happens when your towns covered in Datura and you try it, shit gets weird and you wind up getting possessed.
I cut my thumb open when I first tried it and the devil showed up saying I made a blood oath and I was forced to make others try it out

i honestly do not know why this happened

>be me4 years old
>absolutely adored granparents
>would get excited every summer - 6 week visit
>about 3 days into summer visit i am bouncing around even more happy than usual
>sit on grandmas lap and cuddle her for a few minutes
>hop up and flop on grandpas lap
>hug him for a bit

then for some reason i started punching him in the dick

>"stop it user, you're hurting ol' grandpa"

punch him like 4 more times i the dick

>have not thought about it since that day until now
>no clue what the fuck possessed me to do such thing
>inb4 abuse allegations, these people never hurt me.

Fucking savage.

>so my grandchild is a nice boy
>but he has a problem
>he likes punching dicks

I don't follow at all sorry.
You started "summoning the devil"? playing with exorcism? got delusional and hurt your finger? asked other to do the same?

you don't understand that pain as a child
most kids are fascinated by making other people or animals react in some way
if he reacted with pain, it would be the same interesting reaction as him reacting with laughter
that's how kids work

>be me, like 7 years old
>wake up every morning with huge freaking hard-on; no idea why
>makes it hard to get dressed, etc.
>hurry into the bathroom one morning, concealing my schlogger
>have to piss super bad - can't fucking aim like this
>in desperation, grab a cup/container and start leaking into it
>my fucking brother walks in - I apparently left the door unlocked
>Pissing into a clear plastic cup with an erection, making eye contact with my brother
>Just kill me now.
>mfw we've never mentioned it to each other and both wish we could forget

>Be 4
>Riding car with granny
>Ask how when we'll get there
>She says: "Remember 19"
Hate that number

is he bi or gay now?
older or yunger brother?
younger ones tend to turn or bi or gay anyhow

???
David Lynch?

No. We're both 100% straight - he's my older brother.

das gewd then
maybe that disgusting situation has vaccinated you

all right so theres this plant, called Datura aka The Devils Weed. and being a psychonaut at the age of 16 like most kids in this shitty town I tried it out. Datura is very much a deliriant, it destroys the line between Reality and Fantasy. I lost an entire summer due to it and during that summer I apparently was getting people to try it out during a possession that started when I cut my finger and the devil showed up. The whole thing was like something out of a movie, my best friend turned into a murderer that stabbed a guy 16 times in the chest, and another friends brother killed his parents after all of it

and you do realize it was all in your mind, hopefully.
sounds like this really fucking messed up your community.
doesn't really comply with the topic in here, but woah, heavy shit, dude

What? I assumed she just meant it was 19km or 19 minutes until our destination, just don't know what she told me to remember it the number.

just sounded like she said some random, mysterious code. lol, my bad
"Remember, the owls are not what they seem!"

>Be me Really young
>ask granny what comes after 3
> she says 4
> ok

Same thing happened to me. I was in middle school when I did it.

then came the dubs

Everything that happened is a little blurry, fun thing about Datura is if it kills you (which it is very likely to at the amounts I've taken during that summer) you slide into different realities where things are just slightly different from the one where you died. I've seen things like people switching faces, names being tossed around, one of my teachers names actually changed to Mr. Satan which is kinda weird because he still exists, another teacher that died of cancer was suddenly letting me grow pot on his property with his son that never existed in the one before. Its a hell of a ride

>be me 3 years old
>living in small town
>go to back yard of house
>start playing in the back
>rotten tree stump loaded with bugs
>collecting rollie pollies for hours

idk why but it's always stuck in my mind, those fucking rollie pollies

the stuff that makes you say sorry in your head for years and years

and it's a cliché. most people who go insane also get moments of grandeur. they believe they turned into Napoleon or Cleopatra. your story with the "Mr. Satan" is just the same cliché. your drug clouded mind makes you think any of this shit is exceptional, when really it isn't. I hope you got better.

No, its a hell of bullshit. You having fun trolling the underaged kids around here? Is this your typically saturday night fun?

Dont listen kiddos hes a swindler

that's kinda neat

>be me, young teen
>walking down the road with best friend coming back from store and acting retarded
>Guy in car next to us calls us faggots and flips us off
>tell each other we're not gay as we cry in each other's arms and give complimentary hand jobs.

forgot to mention that it's my very first memory too

Rollie pollies were the shit.

I watch my nieces do these same things, just doing some silly task for almost an hour. collecting things and then just disregarding them again. it keeps them buisy and they have a go at doing things in some systematic way.

my neighbors kids once came over and collected all the watersnails from the pool and put them on the plank to dry, because they thought they all drown.

Well nowadays I just stick it out Hermit mode. Had another possession come in recently after working with the government and it made me realize my mind is in no state to be working in a high school like I was. I'm kinda coming to accept that being delusional and hearing voices every couple of years is gonna be the normal, its interesting theres one voice thats been sticking around calling me Master, it seems a lot like a rhyming demon which is actually pretty useful being a musician

You should get yourself checked. That sounds a lot like you're just stuck on a very bad trip. This is drug induced paranoia and psychosis.

I ain't trolling, I'd pull up the teachers profile if it still existed, but I'll pull up the murders
kcra.com/article/25-year-old-man-stabbed-in-modesto-dies-from-injuries/6420818

I think this was the guy who killed his parents
mercedsunstar.com/news/state/article3249673.html

Here's a more memorable one

>be stupid kid
>on holiday with family
>shoot at uncle with a watergun, because he somehow can't handle snotty kids
>(as a kid, you smell these weaknesses in adults like a fucking truffle pig)
>the entire family laughs at his inability to deal with an unruly kid, shooting water at him
ffw many years
>contact has slowly decreased with this part of the family
>uncle gets a really aggressive cancer and throat bleeding
>literally no one in the family gets in touch
>just gossip how bad his state is
>adult me writes a letter to him, saying i hope he finds consolation and sees the good sides in life, despite the desease
>passes away soon after
>his wife, my aunt, brings along a leather wallet with 1000$ in them and a tiny mother mary icon
mfw i was literally one of the only people to care how he was doing in the end

>be driven to school one day when I was like 6
>see poster for video game Doom
>didn't know what it was at the time - just a poster of a scary face on an old building
>thought 'I'll see how long I can remember this happening'
>still remember it 24 years later

it doesn't specifically say anything about drug abuse.
but you do realize that that Duranto or whatever the fuck that shit is called, is messing you up really really bad.
you need professional help.

>be me
>very young kid
>grandfather bought me an expensive train set
>its the wrong train set, one for kids younger than me
>be angry
>throw a fit
>realize years later how much money it cost him
>still feel bad about it

w8
homie
>be 15
>my father organises parties and such
>work part time for him
>opening of a new cosmetics store
>work as a clown
>give a balloon animal to a kid
>kid untangled it
>meet the kid in an aisle
>hey, let me show you how to fix it so you can do it yourself if it breaks again
>kid starts to cry and runs to their mum
>feel shitty about scaring a kid

lel
yeah you can actually force this shit

>be me 24m
>stand in parents house of then gf
>the entire family is preparing for a trip of some shit
>they go through the house, hardly noticing me
>stand in front of computer under the roof
>walls tiled with wood panels
>sun shines through tiny window
>realize I'm standing in a house in France, far away from home
>"I'll remember this"
still do

I've got professional help, Havent touched the shit in 7 years so its not like i've got a choice, but I'm kinda obligated to tell the story due to the whole thing. The Fucked up Datura Tales is gonna be a book one day but its just gonna be one of those things that haunts me here n there
Though I did get arrested recently for talking about it cause they realized I was going through another possession, thats the game when your playing in satans ball field with friends who believe in aztec gods and make bands in honor of other ones

kek would be cool if this was real

So hows your liver and your kidneys? Ive heard plants like that do some serious damage to your kidneys or liver.

But you also need to consciously understand that you are actually not possessed. These ideas and possessions of Satan you talk about are all in your head.

If you've ever heard and understand what sleep paralysis is about, you understand how the human mind can even trick itself into believing in ghosts, superstition, whatever, all without the use of drugs.

There is nothing special that happened in reality after all that drug abuse, other than the horrible murders and violence. But none of that summoning or possession shit is true. It is purely drug induced narrative that is no different to other drug induced delusions. It really requires outside help, if you still believe that you've actually travelled to other worlds or have been in touch with demons. It's drugs. It's just drugs is what it is, nothing more. If you can't shake the voices in your head, there is help for that. You might need to take medication, but at least you won't end up liable to murder your loved ones, like your former friend.

this gave me MAJOR Déjà vu. i think you're me from a past life or something

Be me. Sitting in my basement.

also have a vivid memory of sitting in my little tree house and seeing a line of worker ants walking through, like a perfect queue of them

that 1 didnt get me the way the first one did, but kinda recall something like that happening too

>be me around 14m
>family dog sleeps in staircase in a big basket
>entrance is upstairs, second basement entrance is next to dog
>get idea to dress as different people
>go in at entrance as someone, talk mad to dog
>leave out the other door, change clothes, talk differently and shake my dog
>trying to see if he still recognizes me

doggo was confused and quiet the whole time.
always smelled it was me. experiment failed.
one of the most stupid ideas I ever had as a kid.

Sad story.

hahaha kek

yup
actually told my aunt near the end that he "just wanted to die"

>be 5 or something
>stand between our couch and table
>think: "I'll remember this moment" for no fucking reason
>still remember

odd how our memory creates these seemingly random landmarks ....

>be me
>8 years or something
>babysitter says she doing something next week
>ask what she might be doing
>dont get told
>still wonder what she did

All these stories make sense, here's mine
>wee lad, 4 or under
>watching blues clues
>hungry
>go to father in his shop
>"dad, can I have a ding dong"
>"sure"
>get a ding dong and eat it while continuing to watch blues clues

>Climbed up the tree in my backyard with a snack
>Read a book
>It was cold so I went back inside.
>Really bad at making my mom care.

.. and you'll be thinking about that till your last breath. dayam!

>implying I don't rinse&eatanyway every single time I drop something

What are you a woman? We've got immune systems for a reason.

mm ding dong looks good.
couldn't eat any sweets due to lactose and gluten intolerance as a baby.

kinda sad

you immune system can't digest hair, it just collects in your stomache until you get a colic, dummy.

Same thing here.
I always watched "over 18" movies with people getting shot and killed even when I was 7 or 8 years old, my parents explained it was all fake once and then let me watch them. Never a problem.

But then, I saw this Simpons episode where Lisa turns into a half octopus or something.
I had nightmares for weeks.

>be ~14
>easter
>have shitloads of easter eggs
>contain cheap chinese plastic toys
>dad tries out spinning top
>snatch it from him
>dad leaves

>never seen dad with such genuine, child-like happiness before or after
>still beat myself up over it to this day

>you immune system can't digest hair, it just collects in your stomache until you get a colic, dummy.

Which is why you rinse it.

got another 1
>be me
>6 or so
>new family laptop
>windows xp
>play pinball

>Be ~10
>Be sick
>Be asleep in bed in daytime
>All of a sudden I wake up
>Can't breathe
>Holy shit I can't breathe
>Run outside to where my parents are
>Desperately try to communicate but nothing is coming out of my mouth
>Throw up everywhere
>Sweet air
>Cry

>you immune system can't digest
mine can't, either

>be 21yo senior in college
>taking a drawing class to finish my art requirements
>have shitty seat in the studio, in the corner where everyone has to squeeze past me to get to the sink
>get in the routine of moving every time someone comes close to me
>girl standing next to me leans over and says something
>I don't really hear her, so I instinctively try to move out of her way so she can get by
>stumble over my own feet
>awkwardly apologize
>turns out she didn't want to get by at all, she was asking me a question
>made myself look like I fell while running away from her
>mfw

>b 5
>Live in a house that's really old
>House has weird large doorway to the kitchen
>Five year old me gets an idea
>Put feet on one side and ass on the other and push against it so I'm "floating"
>Push with rectal muscles
>"MAM IM FLOATING"
>She comes to humor me
>Shit all over floor as she entered

ugh, being sick as a child can be fucking torture

tl;dr: terrible fever experience

>me 10yrs or something
>hellishly high fever
>parents didn't measure or didn't realize it was this bad
>go to sleep
>parents play cards with friends downstairs
>can't sleep
>turn on the tablestand light
>try to read
>all the letters in the book seem to shake and ... scream (?)
>close the fucking book
>ringing noise in ear
>decide to go down as i'm freaked the fuck out of my wits
>take my blanket in one hand and pull it behind me
>walk down the hallway to the staircase in slomo
to this day, I can't walk slowly or I get feverish flashbacks
>while I walk, have this fixed idea of a massive heavy ball rolling through the house
>in my mind, the ball eventually catches me and crushes me
>scenario goes through my mind over and over
>make it downstairs and talk to parents
>ask to please be allowed to sleep on the couch in the living room near their table
>agreed
>hallucinations fade slowly and I sleep

these fucking fever visions haunt me to this day
sometimes I just lie in bed and get a flashback

My cousin had a school thing that happened to be sponsored by McDonald's when I was about 6 or 7.
She had a choice to take anyone with her so she took me. Even though we fought like fucking cunts.

>be me, eating ice cream at the school thing.
>weird fucking clown approaches. Aborted son of the clown from IT and Ronald McDonald.
>pointed at my ice cream and said some ebonic bullshit
>told him to go away
>he said something again, trying to be funny, something like oh someone is tough huhuhuh.

I had severe aggression issues back then. I had them untill I was 16 actually. So what happened next, changed a major school's rules.

>clown walked away 2 seconds after messing with me to mess with other kids
>young me tarding out
>chugged the remaining ice cream
>clown had already went 2 or 3 kids ahead
>jump off the chair and run to him and kick him in the balls and go full Sparta on him
>3 of my cousins teacher pulled me away and I attacked one of them, a 25yo girl
>she got kicked on her leg kinda hard so had tears in her eyes.
>got pulled away
>spent rest of the evening in a corner guarded by some tough PT instructor.
>never went anywhere with my cousin again.
>never felt any guilt

>>never felt any guilt
muhaha!

>just the other day, group of girls, some are cute
>Visiting my city, ask strangers what a certain flag was
>I turn around and then one asks me, I tell her what the flag is
>She looks at me for a while and then says thanks
>I should have asked her if she needed a tour of the city since I had nothing to do, but I'm a socially autistic decent looking kid so it didn't run in my head
>Feelsbadman
>One day autism, one day.

That's the hardest moment, the threshold of making a fool of yourself by asking or fleeing. we flee way too often.

Kek I farted from laughing

>2nd grade
>recently moved to new town going to shitty public school
>lots of hispanics, unruly kids
>was very sheltered so don't know all the cool bad words and stuff
>learn the word sex. Don't know what it means just know that guys and girls do it
>write on some paper "I had sex with my girlfriend"
Can't remember if it was a note or what but I had also drawn a stick figure girl and myself
>teacher sees it and says I'm in trouble and she'll have to tell my parents
>scared shitless but never get talked to by mom and dad

I had nothing to lose these girls didn't even know me. I'm such a tool.

another one from OP

>me 16m in school,
>sports lesson in the hall
>everyone runs in a row in circles through hall
>boring ass shit exercise
>this girl tries to overtake and run in front of me
>stretch out left arm to keep her back
>she was a 9/10 qt3.14 with blackhair and pale skin btw
>accidentally grab her right on her tit as I tell her to stay behind
>am kinda shocked for a second
>commence running with this warm, nice feeling on my hand
>never want to wash hands and shake that feeling
first time touching a boob was bliss.
the cunt is married now, as they all are, and works at a shitty, tiny supermarket in the meat section. not attractive anymore

>be 9-10 or something
>in san diego with friend's family cause they have lotta money and go on trips
>riding the ride which spins chairs around in a circle, it's really big tho
>gril sitting a few chair ahead of me is qt, i stare at her
>she notices and tries not to make eye contact
>GLbitch.jpg
>she keeps glancing back with a scowl
>mouths 'what are you staring at'
>i keep looking
>she yells "what are you staring at creep"!
>get really sad and embarrassed and look down for rest of ride.
>shoe flies off midway thru, land in water of harbor
>fuck

your dad thought you were super awesome and scoring early. lol, all a lie.

especially since girls at young age are mostly condescending, good for nothing entitled cows.

>be me
>be a seemingly endless succession of unspectacular moments

dayam! palms are sweaty, shoe filled with spaghetti

examples