At the end of a poorly-lit alley, a neon sign flickers back to life. It invites you into the building’s warm interior, the bar a shelter from the world’s troubles. You glance at the menu posted on the doorway:
>advice
>conversation
>happy thoughts
Inside, the bartender smiles at you welcomingly. Despite the buzz of both regular and newcomer patrons, you find an empty stool at the counter.
How can I help you tonight, Anonymous?
where's the robo loli i need a robo loli to hug
not sure, but you can get a hug from me if it helps. everything alright?
it has to be from a loli or a robo loli. things aren't great but they're the same as they ever were.
ah... I'm sorry. why aren't they great?
because lolis and robo lolis aren't real
forever alone permavirgin and eternal badfeels
it's aight, you can still jack it to lolis pretty often. sadpanda always has something fresh.
is that the only reason for the bad feels?
i gave up.
this has nothing to do with what is above or below it
don't feel bad, i would too if i were you
I've given up a lot too, user. the best thing you can do is just get back on another horse.
I am not the other user.
"I gave up" is out of context
it's enough reason for badfeels. pornography is nice for releasing steam but it is really saddening to know that there is no hope or room for possibility of having any kind of relationship.
to what end?
Henlo
-SouthPaw
I'll take as much vodka as I can order at once, please.
I mean, the best you can do is to stop constantly looking for a relationship. the hungrier you look, the less likely you are to eat.
just stop caring about a romantic or sexual relationship, and get a lot of good friends. maybe something'll happen down the line.
did I give things up? I left a job in my field of study to focus on my mental health, and probably ruined my easiest entry into that field. I'm working on a new degree now instead.
three things on tap, look at the menu again.
Why do you think there is no hope?
barkeep, im looking for info on those crystal runners on the edge of town.. i think i may have a business proposition for them
heyo. need anything?
not a clue. need anything else?
Vodka gives me happy thoughts, so I'll take happy thoughts I guess.
>"give things up"
I let you misunderstand. sorry.
correcting my mistake "i've given up"
i don't look for it. i can't stop caring about it. its almost like invasive thoughts. my entire being wants it. and i want to stop being lonely. i have good internet friends, we talk every day and i would do anything for them and vice versa. im basically unable to relate to almost everyone so seeking additional friends is not useful. i can go for months without badfeels when i try to focus on a hobby or some shit. but there is very little i have interest in as far as hobbies go. and inevitably i will always crash and feel this way. a growing part of me just wants to die.
do you have a daugher you can hook me up with?
I... Guess not, I just wanted to say hi I guess. Sorry about wasting your time...
-SouthPaw
hey barkeep any goblins around. wait wrong fantasy setting
I do not have a daughter. Sorry.
actually yeah, thinking about some haptic dermal implants, I heard you got some work done.. you know 'down there'. was looking to hear your experiences
today's happy thought is: it's still Oktoberfest and I went to a German village today. cheap craft beer is heavenly.
oh, I mean... there's not much you can do if you've decided you're giving up. the best you can find is something new. give up a hobby, find a new one. drop out of school, re-evaluate options and find a career path you can tolerate and hopefully get into. give up on a relationship... just let it hurt for a while and allow it to heal.
that's... more relatable thanI'd like to admit. have you considered you may be depressed? it sounds like the symptoms I'd experienced.
that's alright! I hope you're having a nice night.
i have no idea what you mean.
That's cool I guess, but I still have problems and I'm still not drunk enough to ignore them. Do you have any booze in the back? I'll pay extra for it.
ah c'mon, no shame in it! wanting a little extra boost in the sheets doesnt mean your tackles checking out, hey if you really wanna rock those xeno broads you need all the help you can amirite?
yes i am very depressed and i have been suicidally depressed. i wasn't depressed for a couple of weeks but i am again now. i just don't see that there is a future for me thats worth living. i don't have anything to look forward to and i don't find life very enjoyable. additionally the vast majority of society would probably like me to cease living. i only continue to live for my internet friends who do care about me and don't want me to cease living.
all I've got is a hug back here, just for you, user.
I have no idea what you mean.
mm... you remind me a lot of how one of my best friends sounds right now. we called a welfare check on him, and he's actually starting intensive outpatient therapy next week. that might not be as deep as you want to go (understandably), but have you looked into any level of therapy at all?
It's... Well, it could be better.
-SouthPaw
dont be dense there is no therapy for someone like me. they would just throw me behind bars and put me on a list and tell me i can't live where i live because its within 20 miles of a school
Well, it's better than nothing, I'll take the hug I guess.
what should I give these little nigettes for Halloween?
Semen.
ah... I'm really sorry to hear that. you wanna talk about it? we can talk about it in private, if you'd feel more comfortable.
it's always worth a shot, hon.
their dogs back.
i feel like you didn't read my post. i would sooner commit suicide than put myself behind bars and place myself on a draconian registry.
I'm good, it's nothing I haven't dealt with before. Happens all the time, really, I'm all good, I really don't wanna bother you.
you don't need to compete for hobbies. I make music for fun because I like making noises. never entered a competition or anything of the sort. you just gotta have something you don't mind failing at a bit before you do something right.
therapy won't put you on a list. right now, my "diagnoses" don't affect anything of my life. the diagnoses are just codes for the insurance to know why they're paying for stuff.
don't worry about it! we've never talked all that much. I'll send you a message when I'm back home later in the week, and you can let it out.
Semen is mine.
What dogs? They're all dead
what, i meant candy, what candy should I give them
maybe you can give them the gift of seeing you in cuffs, then.
mandatory reporting laws for therapists in the united states of america indicate that there is a high risk of being reported to authorities were i to approach a therapist with the issues i would approach them with. additionally there is absolutely nothing a therapist can actually do for me. even if one were to risk their license to practice by not reporting me to authorities, they would be nothing more than a colossal waste of my time and money.
tfw no robo loli
39 comments in an hour... slow night?
I mean... you options seem to be getting treatment, getting arrested, or just dealing with it and having a sad wank now and then.
I'd take the sad wank, if that's your view of treatment.
Sorry, you replied to the wrong person. I'm just useless.
Try again.
-SouthPaw
You know that's never going to happen
You know how it is. It takes people a while to find their way here..
is there anything else you want? advice on how to survive being single again or something?
I didn't mean to reply to anyone, I just forgot to delete the # of the comment I clicked on, sorry.
What if I don't want to go in?
What if it smells like dog piss?
thats not my view of treatment. that is what treatment actually is for people like me. that is what society thinks of me. i've had sad wanks for 15 years. they don't make the loneliness go away. the loneliness makes me want to die. why can't robo loli be real?
everything smells like dog piss if you let a dog piss on your face. next time don't black out drunk on the floor.
because most people would view it as illegal, probably. I think there were some younger looking realdolls being considered for production, but I'm not looking that shit up on hotel wifi.
Just wondering what I should give kids for Halloween. I want to make them happy with some good stuff
Hug and happy thought please.
Potatoes.
kids like candy, right? I think they like candy.
you can have the biggest hug. your happy thought is: I had a dream I ran a thread last night, and you were the main person I remember showing up.
you doing alright? I always feel like I never ask, and we only ever catch each other in passing...
i just know there's that one loli model lillims that comes into the bar every now and then. i've always been too scared to get her digits. i know they make those silicon doll things you can dress up and fuck but i dont think a silicon doll will make me feel less lonely.
-hug-
(nutting so hard in your girl she becomes yandere for you)
Lol that made me laugh
-sigh- what kind of candy though
find a flat-chested petite girl? I'm trying to come up with the solutions I can here, but it's not super easy.
I don't eat candy. why would I know?
article on Nerdist says the most popular candy in NY is sour patch kids. get those little packets of them for halloween baskets.
Chek'd
Oi, barkeep. I'd like a tall cool glass of happy thoughts please with a shot of conversation to chase.
wtf you even know where i live? psycho
thank you for the advice, you're better than alice
been suggested to me a few dozen times. there's no solutions. you don't have to try so hard to find one. i've already thought and pondered on the lack of possibilities for several years. do you serve any drinks that will numb my feelings?
today's third happy thought of the day is: is alive for the first time in at least a week. small art communities are back!
okay, that may only be happy for me.
how are you tonight?
it's also the most populated state in my timezone, just tends to be a good one for statistics like that.
there's only three things on the menu. I hope you find some kind of relief soon, though. or at least the strength to keep going.
French fry shaped.
I wasn’t around last night, we did talk a little I think three days agoish. It is a happy thought though.
To be honest no, but I’ll figure it out one of these days... been having anxiety and panic attacks at work. Coworkers are convinced I’ve lost my mind.
i'll just have a glass of water then.
Do you enjoy them? Which state do you live in? Lets hangout I'm bored
Omg lol I wouldn't do that to kids!
like I said, just a dream. you getting any treatment for those symptoms?
one glass of water, straight from your own faucet.
don't eat candy. no.
Which state do you live?
No, that's a happy thought. Art is wonderous. Like actual (make this because I want to see it) art not the let's mass produce a shiny thing for money art.
> Art washes the dust of everyday life off the soul.
I'm not bad, trying to harness that last reserve or strength to finish the week off strong and make it to the weekend. Past couple of months have been pretty draining, I know I am a bit tattered arounder the edges atm
so, anyone get destiny 2 for pc?
I heard that people were getting permanently banned for simply having discord open/
Which Kanra are you?
ah... I understand that feeling really well. just a bit more stress in a few weeks, and then I have a month of getting drunk and making music again.
that's... pretty dumb of them to do. almost happy I can't run it.
oh, one of em i guess...
why?
Ah fair enough haha. I hope it was a good dream. Yes and no, work has essentially kept me away from my therapist, I’ve been able to see him twice in the last 60 days and am out of state again for another 25 ish days. So the solution was throw Zoloft at me with blood pressure meds until I get back. But tato’s
ay ayy fella, think you could hook me up with some bombass butthash?
word around town is that you got a guy who sells the best butthash in the whole district and that getting to him is hard unless you know him or come across his way
that's... not too great. how's the medication helping you out, at least?
the fuck is butthash?
Alice's Kanra? My Kanra? Which one.
Lets meet up, baka
>conversation
I took an unscheduled nap and now my sleep schedule's all fuckled.
I need the question in list form so I can check other... I'm mine.
hey, so you aren't dead. did that weird user pass along any of my messages at all?
also, I can understand whack-naps. I took one last week and couldn't get to sleep until 4AM for days.
Dunno yet, supposedly it takes a couple of weeks before it starts to take effect. But I hope it will help. On a good note I did finish my first play through of Valhalla before I left. Comfiest game I’ve ever played.
>the fuck is butthash?
nice try Jeff but i'm not the FBI nor the DEA
look here, pal, i just want to get high as shit nigger and i know you can call your dude cause i wanna get high as shit nigger so much but i can't
Please man, i will pay good money for it
That sounds like it will be a good month. I hope it goes well for you
ah... that feels weird to me, getting onto a new medication without constant contact with your doctor to keep an eye on side-effects. I had to go in weekly for the first three weeks so they could verify its efficacy. hope it all works out for you, though. got a few friends on Zoloft, it's at least taken the edge off of their anxiety to make life livable again. hope it stays the same.
dude, I have no idea what you mean. I don't know illicit substances.
hey, you as well. hope you make it to the end so you can have some enjoyable recovery time.
oh boy, druganons cranky.
TAKE THE MONEY OUT! ALL OF IT!
ANYBODY MOVE I'LL BLOW YOUR FUCKIN' HEAD OFF!
Ah yeah. I tried to pass a message back through them but perhaps it got lost in the ether. I haven't been posting much lately sad to say. Too much work, not enough brain juice.
I have to be up at 4am so let's hope I can get back to sleep before then. How've you been?
what
...eh. I'm holding up. coming down from being drunk and chilling in a hotel room, before spending another day on the highway. sorry to hear work's been keeping you down. family and boyfriend doing well, at least?
phone rings
picks up phone
"this is a robbery"
hangs up
Ah? Roadtrip or something else? Sounds interesting.
And yeah, everyone else is well. My older brother moved back home recently so my house feels lively. Buying tickets to visit boyfriendo finally next week.
That’s fair enough, I think I should follow in suit of what you said you did and leave my job to take care of myself at this point.
I’m out for the evening I should try and get some sleep. Drive safe Jill.
No, it's fine! You did nothing wrong!
hey, that sounds good. I'm glad everything's going pretty smoothly for you. a lot faster than I'd expect after that kind of disaster, to be honest, but we don't often get those around here.
that open invitation for a bartender still open, or do I fall on the wrong side of battle lines now?
I think you should focus on your care, yeah, but it becomes a bit of a balancing act. I got too far into it and hit a breaking point before I finally reached out for help, and it sounds like you aren't quite there.
night, Hitagi.
>No, it's fine!
Thanks.
>You did nothing wrong!
That isn't exactly true.
Revy?
Battle lines? I'm not aware of a battle or lines, but you are always welcome in my eyes. I've been too preoccupied with trying to leave the country on short notice to pay attention to stuff like that.
I think I might go for a walk before trying to sleep again. Good chatting. I'll try to stop by more~
discord/HPBUAw
Come one, come all.. we've got.. dicks and shitposting
Yes