What is the most stupidest shit you did as a kid or believed

What is the most stupidest shit you did as a kid or believed.

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Stay in school, get a degree, get a good job.

I pronounced 'island' "Iss-land" until I was about 9.

Nice hair

m.soundcloud.com/user-205633393/buried-and-gone

Even when I was a kid I never said stupid shit like "most stupidest."

I thought lunatic was pronounced "loo-natick"

>poor people

I though that Finland and Singapore were the same country.

I pronounced grand prix as grand pricks

Cop's are good people.

I used to think that if I was strong enough to lift my entire body that I could lift up my legs and levitate.

I don't see why this couldn't work

That OP wasn't a faggot

I was on the school yard, and some older kid came up to me holding a gummy key, he told me that his key could open any lock in the world and I believed it. He had a big brown paper bag filled with them, so I thought he must have made a bunch so he could eat some and use some. Every time I saw him, Id ask for a key to open a lock but he'd never give me one, I seriously lost sleep and cried about it as I wanted to be a spy and go into buildings. Also, unrelated, but at this school we'd rip squares of grass out of the ground and throw them onto the roof, fun times.

I used to think men casually wore condoms when they were with their wife's so they wouldn't pee themselves when they got boners

I thought oatmeal was oakmeal. Maple syrup and maple-smoked bacon were associated with breakfast, so eating oak trees didn't seem far-fetched.

I thought that you paid for houses and cars all at once instead of paying for them over time.

That my laptop hdmi out would work the other way. As in I could plug in my xbox and play games using the laptop screen.

Didnt take long to make me a doofis

i used to think that the water that drained down the sink was the water that was given to the poor african children, so i used to leave the tap running so they could get clean water.

underage b&

i did that when i was in 1 grades and the kids laughed at me, but thinking back how most of those dumb asses are probably crack addled husks or locked up in prison, i get a warm feeling

i mean 1st grade for fuck sake, it was a new word for me, island 1st graders don't know about silent letters

I bet im older than you.

Santa, God, parents wouldn't lie to you. The usual shit

xbox 360 released 2006

Lol this

i thought planes with their contrails were boats, it seemed logical that the ocean went out to the horizon then came back overhead.
Maybe i saw boats from a cliff or something and made it up.

i pronounced banal to rhyme with anal.

That I would eventually discover some powers. Like if I concentrated hard enough I could eventually use telekinesis or something. Probably til I was like 7 maybe even 8 years old haha fuckin a I was dumb

I thought you worked no more than 1-2 hours a day.
I thought you could buy a house for an unspecified amount of money which you could easily fit into a wallet.
I thought there were robotic hands in the chimney.

i remember seeing an ad for african kids where they searched the trash dumps for food so i thought if i throw away food in a bag that they would eat a healthy meal

I thought I never really slept, because when I woke up the last thing I always remembered was I went to bed a moment ago.

...

ok your just retarded.

>Every young dbz fan ever
I used to think I could levitate if I focused my energy hard enough and I still have dreams where I use my levitation powers to impress people usual in an attempt to start a cult

also i used to worry about how if i was the only person in the world and everyone was an android up until i was 12

/thread

Teacher once took my dollar away because i had it out and told me i would get it back at the end of the day. I thought the end of the day was at like 7 or 8 pm and i never got it back

I thought that if I argued with communists/socialists on Sup Forums I'd change their opinion......No wait that was 10 minutes ago.

/thread

Thought that airplanes fell with earthquakes

Drank red Kool-Aid while taking a piss, hoping it would come out red....

Until I was about 10, I thought humans could produce chocolate breast milk. Regular milk would come out the left tit and chocolate would come out the right.

In 3rd grade I whipped out my dick and showed it to my friend

same, but for me the dream isn't about impressing people. in my dream, I just jump up like normal and then quickly cross my legs indian style and I float. I can move in any direction by just leaning my body. but for me, this isn't a good thing. in my dreams, its the only way I can move and it is very upsetting. these dreams are usually boardline nightmares.

>inb4 Freud
>inb4 reddit spacing

I used to think that if I turned around I had to turn back around or my soul or something would get twisted up

This thread always gives me a chuckle. Small humans are so fucking retarded
>so are big humans
Fuck we are dumb

used to wonder why people died in airplane crashes. figured that once the got close enough the the ground the could just jump out and be fine.

in preschool my "girlfriend" told me it's bad to show people your dick so i pulled my pants down and ran down the street screaming "dick! dick! look! a dick!"

no, wait, it was because I wanted to see her "hole" and she told me she wouldn't show me because its bad to show people the things between your legs. Now I remember, that was why I went atomic back then

I want to go back in time and slap myself for being such a sadistic twat sometimes. I was pretty gullible and ran with bullies and psycho's, I was way too trusting as well. Growing up and looking back, it was dumb and I regret a lot of things, but also lucky that i could defend myself. Given the environment and my upbringing I dont blame myself too much, Im just glad i moved on and grew up. I cant seem to shake some weird and bad behaviors though, but its mostly self destructive these days. So i think being a sadistic cunt was more stupid than believing in Santa.

I'm living in the wrong neighborhood

I dropped my pants in preschool. The teacher asked me why I did it, then I cried. Still not sure why I dropped my pants in front of everyone.

what are you mentally deficient? Everyone knows Finland does not exist

Bugs bunny taught you that shit

I thought when you lost limbs they would grow back, because that would be unbelievably cruel if they didn't, wouldn't it?

Share some examples amon I'm interested

I put a hand soap dispenser nozzle into my urethra and pumped a whole thing of bath water into it. It was the worst pain I'd ever experienced including the compound of my left leg and trying to kill myself combined.

Honestly, I'd punch my past self in the face and tell me to get my shit together, or else I'll become the depressed underachiever that I am. Despite getting good grades throughout school, I never had the drive to do anything worthwhile.

I thought men gave birth to babies too. I thought that it determined your sex. That is, women only gave birth to girls and men to boys.
Then when I learned only women gave birth, I believed it was connected to why they live longer (I also thought that people died at some certain specified age)

In most cases you fucked something up really hard if you lost a limb

Why the fuck would you do that user?

I thought that if i stuffed socks, pants and other clothes in my brothers backpack it would work as a parachute if I jumped from the window from the sixth floor. My mom saw me at the last moment standing on the window sill.

Seemed like a good idea for a 5 year old me. I didn't know what a dick was for besides peeing. I figured if water comes out, what if water went it. I'm actually a theoretical physicist now trying to bring back plasma cosmology.

Put mini-lantern propane tanks on the railroad tracks

That's not how it's pronounced?

when i was 7 i put an egg in a shoe box thinking that a dinosaur would hatch from it. I completely forgot about it until my mom noticed a strange smell and found the box under the sofa with the worm covered in maggots.

egg* covered in maggots

I used to think chimpanzees turned into gorillas

niggers tongue my anus

When I was 5 or 6, I believed that I was physically defective because I blinked my eyes automatically. I would deliberately try not to blink, until I couldn't take it anymore.

My plan was to wait until I was 18 and out of the house, and then kill myself, because I didn't want to live with such a defect.

I'm not sure why it didn't occur to me to look at other people and see if they blinked too.

>user tries to bring back plasma cosmology
>finally has a breakthrough eureka moment
>"if plasma comes out, what if it went in"
>hugesuccess.jpg
>reporters swarming to him for an interview
>"how did you figure it out?"

I thought Philadelphia was a country

I used to think everything in olden times was in black and white and that somehow someone turned everything color

rhymes with canal nigga

Physics really fucked me in highschool. I wanted a career in law enforcement, and figured physics wouldn't get me shit in life. I've been working for a bond company as a fugitive recovery officer for 6 years, and I've never needed physics for anything.

That if you took a drug for something you didn't have, you would get it.

>this

youtube.com/watch?v=g62vFgt7RRo
you figured it out

> found video of user as a 5 year old
youtube.com/watch?v=KQoJo81lujk

This.
Waste your life.
fortunately i smoked weed drunk beer had lots of fun.
I can still get a 'degree'
They can't gett there childhood back.

I used to think that the cast after a movie was every word that was spoken during the movie.

Also one time when i was 9 for some reason i started to think that i was supposed to view things from a third person point of view. like a third person shooter. i though there was something wrong with me for some time.

I believed in God.

No shit? I was in the army for 6 years myself. I went in for infantry after I dropped out of college the first time. Afterwards, did my undergrad and now have tenure at CalTech

I wont go into details, just picking on and bullying people etc. People of all ages and sizes, animals even, whoever got in our way. Having maybe too much ego and arrogance growing up, which you can sustain better in a group. I really think I should have fucking known better, and that seems worse than the real dogs I ran with who probably still dont give a fuck, the guys who would throw in more fists to a fight that was over. This is all stuff that happened when I was in my late teens. Its fucking dumb looking back.

What if every great scientist came up with their groundbreaking ideas by playing with their dicks in their childhood, and they were just too embarrassed to admit it?
It would actually explain why there are so little women in science.

*you're

AZN benis Xddddd

Why the fuck would you even think you might need physics at that job? Most people won't, those courses help sort us into our most useful position

when i was 14 i sent dick pics to a nigerian prince email scammer
he only wanted bank details instead he just got the d

>youtube.com/watch?v=KQoJo81lujk
This had me dying.

I used to think latinos spoke latin

wat

I did all that in college and now have a high paying career in my field.

Underage

>tfw he might have earned more money on that 14yo dick pics than on those scams

I believed that live as an adult would be so much better.

>cow=milk
>Brown cow=chocolate milk
>Pink cow=strawberry milk
>Yellow cow=lemon milk

my mom would cut my toast in 4 pieces and I believed it would give me more to eat

I used to think that if you stopped or went backwards on a vhs tape, the next scene would be different cause the actors would be thrown off from the script