Late Night Relationship Advice/Q&A thread. If you have a question, I'll Try and help

Late Night Relationship Advice/Q&A thread. If you have a question, I'll Try and help.

Older anons help younger anons etc.

>also any more Mei pic exactly like this one?

Bump

This gonna be a short thread for me anons? I'm gone in 45 min.

So i the first girlfriend ive ever had that i really loved broke up with me a few months ago. I literally cannot get her out of my head and it pisses me off because ive really been trying to. Ive been pretty depressed these last months and whenwver i think about it it makes me even more depressed. I dont want to say anything too revealing but basically she wouldnt give me a straight answer on why she was breaking up with me. I dont what to do. I dont see this mindset im in ending any time soon. Please help user.

Would like help with this too
>Just get over her
Wish it was that easy, it's almost like saying, "Just stop being so depressed."

Feeling lovesick because of it too, which drives me to feeling overly sexual, which is uncomfortable.

So my girlfriend is pretty prudish when it comes to sex while I am quite kinky. She struggles with me dirty talking to her sometimes and has no desire for other fetish stuff. I would love to get her to be open to new things and eventually get her to want more extreme things for her like threesomes and even cuckolding. Any advice?

Your hung up on her user. Which is okay, it's to be expected for your first breakup, especially if she wasent clear about it/didn't give proper closure. Beacuse you've never gone through this before it's going to be rough, but you'll get through it.

First things first is getting rid of all forms of communication with her. Block her number, block her Facebook, block her Twitter etc. I know you will want to pour over her accounts , but don't. Get rid of your access to them. If you don't you'll keep hanging around.

Step two is to focus on yourself. If you try and forget her, or remember to forget her, you will never stop thinking about her. Instead focus on improving your life and yourself and as you move on, she won't matter anymore.

Learn a skill, pick up a new hobby, practice said hobby, get fit, learn to cook, read some comics etc. This will help you forget her, and it will allow you to meet new people who you might become intrested in down the line.

Otherwise , sitting at home, you'll keep yourself in an endless cycle of self loathing. Don't do that, go out and break the cycle.

Refer to this. If you want more specifics let me know. Or if you have any other questions ask away.

>tfw you've been alone for so long, you can't even really visualize yourself being with another person

Thanks for the advice.
I do want to get over her i think. I have an obsessive personality and little motivation when it comes to bettering myself and such as you said. I think i just dont see my own life as worth anything so its easier being obsessed with something else or having someone else there to distract me from my own life. And despite my obssessive personality and doing plenty of other things since the breakup, it still hasnt put me any closer to not thinking about her.
I know theres no quick cure-all. I guess im just lonely. Thanks for listening.

Take it at her pace, but also understand that sometimes people don't like what they don't like. You gf may never like cuckolding or threesomes, in which case you will have to accept that and move on. Find a new fetish. Let's be honest that's what this really is about, not her, but you and your specific fetish.

As for the other stuff take it slow with her. Do her fetishes/dreams and try and make sex fun/comfortable. She will open up to you over time and will be more respective to different types of fetishes.

As for dirty talk, take it slow again. Don't just rush in with "Whos your fucking daddy you filthy slut". Be ca lamer and gentle. Teasing Things like "who loves me?" "Who needs me?" Etc etc. And once she's comfortable take it up a notch.

Also communication is key. It always is. Explain what you want and what you like. As what she wants and what she likes, create a middle ground.

That was me for 4 months or so. I just excommunicated after I stopped asking what happened, and at this point (while I'd still fuck her) I have no feelings. I probably reached that point about 9 months after, was only a 6 month relationship (and I did a terrible job). As others have said, do your best to just stop. Or make up a reason as to why she left you and create your own closure, even if it doesn't reflect reality

No problem user. Anytime. As for:

> I think i just dont see my own life as worth anything

I used to be like that and think like that. Especially when I had my first breakups. Pic related helped me. Specifically the line "it's helps people contribute to society in the most efficient manner possible." It's helped me realize that my job was important and that I was contributing to society as a whole. Which helped me feel important. Then I started bettering myself so that I could get a better job. So that I could contribute better. And before I knew it I had changed as a person and had moved onto a better stage in my life.

Hope it helps you.

How to save relationship (close freinds) after being super cringy for a year w/o realizing it?

Being not that guy

That sounds like solid advice; however, it seems as though women tend to hint at things, and want you to figure it out rather than straight up telling you

Don't visualize. Work at it.

It doesn't matter if you don't know what being with someone would be like. You'll know its like when you find someone. Then you wont need to "visualize it" because you'll be living it.

But in order to obtain that, in order to get jnto a relationship, you need to work at it. And you start by working on yourself. You need to be interesting, you need to have good social skills and you need to prove your good Husbando material. So pick up a fucking hobby, or learn a fucking skill. Have something about you that fulfills these three catagories. Like cooking for example.

Then you start taking care of yourself, get fit, eat good shit, have nice hygiene. Talk to some /fa/ggots and gain a nice personal style.

Then you get yourself a relationship and before you know it you'll never be alone again because you'll have a fucking companion. Someone who loves you forever.

If you want to not be lonely, then you now have your quest

still with 1st gf ever, had some stuff before her, but she was my first, and i was hers. Weve been dating for almost four years now and im coming up on the end of college. Our sex life isnt that great and never has been, its always a guessing game if its going to happen when I come home for the occasional weekend. When we do have sex its good, just dont know why we dont have more. Have brought it up with her before but the conversation ends with me feeling like a piece of shit and saying sorry for even bringing the subject up. I love the chick but damn, I have a super high libido and hers is almost non existent. what do Sup Forums help a beta out

heres some advice go back to the thread you started ya fuck

Hmm, I've a question. Thinking about getting into a relationship with someone who's super innocent (and seems to adore me), but I'm a cynic on levels one may be unable to comprehend without my life experience.
I'm wondering whether y'all think it's a good/bad idea. I can provide more direct detail if questioned

>Anonymous 10/31/17(Tue)23:27:38 No.749716296▶
how does she adore you?

sur ei';m drunk, lets do this.

I ador this girl. we always gigle and laugh at each others joekms and talke dabout some personal stuff. I got oneiteis, and have been trying to ask her to grab dinner or hang out. I get super delayed responses of maybe, or no response for them. grnated she takes a whiel to resopond to normal texts. I at first pout it up to her super anxiety. but now i'm seeign it for what it is, she don'rt se e me that way. Its disheatneing as she and i, ithohyt clicked. Wer eboth single and nervous and goofy, ,and sociualt awkward.

I've drnak every ngith for three weeks now tryign to calm me aobut her and her responses. reassurng me about the situatin . I need a way to get over her. i keep gettign told i'm handsome when im fucking obese and no woman who was sober has said so0p. Should ei take a drunks words for ture? arent wee more honest the higher our abv is>?

please tell me some way to either get her into me or get her outt of my head.

>I t seems as though women tend to hint at things, and want you to figure it out rather than straight up telling you

Very true. But fuck any women who do that.

One thing I've learned about relationships is that women think guys process and think in the same ways as other women. They think we can understand subtly and that we should be able to pick up on the small hints that they lay out for us, rather than just telling us. But we miss those hints most of the time and then they get upset.

Which is why I said "communication is key" I make it very clear to my partners that if they want something, they ask for it. If they have something on their mind, they tell me it. No bullshit. Most agree to that, but still drop hints and be subtle. And this gets ignored. And they learn that yes, they should be direct about what they want. It's helps to keep a good relationship.

It's the ones who don't realzie this and continue to do subtle bullshit that are the ones I hate. they are the ones who cause problems later down the line in a relationship. So once you figure out that they do this shit, just get out.


A good relationship,is about communication and trust. You should be direct, and if she doesn't like it well too fucking bad. If you order a sub at subway and aren't direct about your order, your going to get a shitty sub. That's on you.

Been trying to change for about a year now. Thought I had something back in April but... it was not to be.

Thats what ive done. Basically i talked to her a week or so after the breakup, figured some things out, told her that i cared about her and i wasnt going to just abandon her. Was honestly fine with just being friends, maybe taking a step back and she said shed like that. Then she just got all defensive next time i tried to talk to her etc. I took that as a she straight up lied to me about multiple things and i stopped trying. She made it clear she didnt want anything to do with me so i stopped all contact. Im just at the point where its been a while and it has not gotten any better. I constantly think about her, even when my mind is occupied by something else which i dont understand how thats possible. Just me typing this right now at 2AM is proof enough to me that somethings stopping me from getting over her.
I really appreciate the help but that approach doesnt really work. I see how it could for some people but i dont really care about money or my job or myself i guess that much. I like obsessing over things because when i look back at it, it makes my life less boring. I just want something to happen, good or bad because im stuck in this rut and i cant see anything changing for a long time.

It's not absolute "OH MY GOD FUCK ME", but she's there, interrupting my conversations and trying to be noticed whenever I'm around. Some of it may be attention-whore behaviour; there's evidence for that.

I guess another facet of this is that I know that I don't want a lifelong relationship with her, and
I'm unsure as to whether it is moral to give in to her and spend time with her to tide me over until I find another woman. Pretty sure it's a bad idea

do go on, here and crunk me is readuy to help, but needd more info user.

what mesak her innocemrt and waht says she s into you?

Look I gotta go to bed and I don't have time for this shit. Especially with drunk speech.

So you get a quick and dirty.


Get yourself fucking togeather. Do you think the girl you like would love to see you like this? No. It's pathetic. It's weak. So fix it. Improve yourself,

Now listen closely. Be direct and ask her out. Say she's cute, say you've never done this shit before and that your nervous. But that you'd like to go to dinner with her. Be clear be direct. If she accepts, your good to go. If she doesn't, then fine, time to move on.

When you move on, improve yoruself. Pick up a hobby, lose some weight. Gain some self control, become a person who is datable.

Put yourself togeather, piece by piece

In addition, I know that I tend to "fill" the space I occupy, and take control over things I have any stake in, and I wonder whether I will be okay with taking a more delicate person and molding them to my desire. It wouldn't be "You are mine now", but many subtle changes over time that could amount to a different person leaving the relationship

Alright I gotta go. Get some sleep. Good talks guys.

OP OUT

god mdan oytur good! youre right, she woudlnt like me as i am,. fuck i donht liekme . i need to fix myesled. wshes a lost cause, she already kniows i think shes great. she's just being piolite, i see it now., fuck it , fuck mew

>innocent
There's a large relative age difference. Plus, you can just tell sometimes. I may be confusing naivete for innocence though.

>into me
I can just tell, she seeks me out, she does her best to be in my frame of vision, when she's speaking near me obvious body language

thne dont bne liek me! Kepep maikign her fele special nad be open and polite with your inten ts.

as for cynical i am ntoito. too, to,. buit at a ceratin time your gonne oepon up yo somweone. let them in and let her innocence renwe your faith in liofe. dont let itf spread to her. keep your shit ourllolok to yourseld, and oprtect that innocvcent prety girl. you get yours boo!

Currently in second year of college. Started dating my gf tail end of summer before senior year. Crushed on her for years, 8-9/10. Go to end of last school year. She is going to Alaska for the summer. Now studying abroad in the Netherlands. Agree to fuck others while we're separate. Hook up with two girls over summer, but I know she's isolated in Alaska and hasn't been with anyone else. Now I find out she hooked up with some guys in Europe. Cry like a bitch. Have no friends because I transferred to a new college. She messaged me saying she would do long distance with me if I wanted. Do I hold out and assume college life will get better without her (fucking whores at parties, having friends to be around, not constantly depressed) or do I agree to be exclusive with her? She would definitely get back with me when she returns, regardless if I don't date her now.

Thanks, I'll think about it.
Also, your drunk typing is remarkably legible.

its ma mix of dunka dn sausage finferslol

as domesome who wants tah inncoent girl rttype, you bnetter keeop her protecred an d hodl on.,

if she adoes you thwena you neeed to ensadsure ytoudotn take avadfantage.

Jenny, Jenny, Jenny....sigh. What I would give to physically touch your body. I would show you what being a teenager is all about.

:)

I last too long in bed. How do I cum faster daddy? Like it gets raw for both of us before I can finish.

In a committed long term relationship with a woman I love but I've always been bi-curious, I really wanna hook up with a guy to see what it's like. Is it worth it or should I just be happy with what I have?

Ask Kevin Spacey to help you find out, then your girl can't complain

lol good one

bump