Ask a firefighter anything, /b

Ask a firefighter anything, /b

Have ever sucked a firemate's cock?

I have not.

...next?

Can you write RB on that timestamp?

ever touched a dead burnt body's tits?

What's the greatest loot you ever plundered from a fire?

Are you trying to RBstamp my timestamp?

Depends chief. Are you willing to try?

How scary is it when you have to go into a nog hood?

change ems on your uniform to pms for maximum lols plz

Technically? Yes. But not in a weird way.

Firefighters HATE thieves. Taking shit that's not yours is among the highest of ass-beating-worthy sins in FDs everywhere.

How many funerals have you gone to?

seconded

what's a nog hood?

Yes. An idea person. I like you.

A lot. They suck.

What do you think about this?

Eggplants

Spear chuckers

Porch monkeys

Pretty weird and creepy.... but whatever you're into is fine as long as you're not hurting anybody.

Is the pool closed?

you know, coloreds

Like... Olympians?

I am also a firefighter.

Talk about an over paid cake job. 9 times out of 10 you respond to a drunk hobo or an lonely old man. Cops at least have to put thier life on the line each day.

It's never closed. Just pretend like you didn't know.

ohhhhhh like somebody is trying to be edgy. meh.

If drunk fucktards spill the oil from a turkey fryer should they go with co2 or something else?

*chest bump*

Slow FDs are like airline pilots... paid to be there for the rare occasions shit goes South, because you REALLY want somebody who knows what they're doing when it does.

Urban FDs work our assess off. I love Houston PD though, we work closely together constantly, and help each other constantly.

Being honest. I have a friend that is a firefighter in Brussels and the firefighters refuse to go into the black and muzzie parts of town without armed police escorts because they will get shot at.

What is the most fucked up thing you have seen on the job?

As long as it's not a water extinguisher you should be fine... dry chem and CO2 should both work well on an oil fire.

so how serous are those softball games between you guys and cops?

Why the fuck would you shoot at people trying to put the fire burning your ass out?

I've never been to Brussels, so I can't comment. Good beer there, probably.

Dead babies? That's the worst for me. I'm ok with the gore parts.

>having guns in eurotown

dubs and this man gets demoted

Whats the most dangerous situation you've ever been in?

Because sometimes it's gangs that start fires of rivals houses and dont want them to put it out. Or them burning evidence but that would be a really dumb way of doing it.

One time, get this, he was inside a building while it was on fire

Pretty serious. Former college athletes on both sides, they take that shit seriously.

Many FDs do medical calls, too, including to shootings in gang areas. We get shot at now and then, god knows why.

What's your job?

How do you feel when you see the burnt babies? Have you ever taken a picture you weren't allowed to take at these scenes? I know fuck all about what you lot carry around with you, so sorry for the dumb question.

...

Heh, he's pretty much got the gist of it. Very hot house fire (melted part of my helmet), seat of the fire inaccessible, building stability unknown. Not fun.

Bullshit. Pics or it didn't happen

Firefighter-paramedic (we take turns between the trucks and ambulance)

Never seen a burnt baby thank god. Definitely taken pics I wasn't supposed to.

God I love Metalocalypse.

Is your name richard?

Heaviest thing you lifted in an emergency situation?????

Ooo that's a neat question. Dragged a 300lb pt. in cardiac arrest out of his bedroom into the living room so we had room to do CPR.

Well, I have lived in Houston and I have seen the shitty hoods. Are there any issues whan you have to go in them. Stop being a faggot and just answer the question.

Well, how do you think it would go down if you saw one? Would you throw up?

>checked
And thanks mate.

What percentage of you guys are gay?

Do all the Female firefighters get fucked by the crew?

The apartment complexes in the ghettos are shit shows on the weekends... dozens of drunk/high/whatever people all screaming at us to "do something" without knowing what is truly necessary when somebody is sick or hurt. Sucks. You can usually find somebody among them to calm the crowd down if you talk to em though.

No, I've got a strong stomach... but I'd probably be sad for a long time. I really hope I never see that.

Are you or one of your ff buds a pyromaniac ?

Probably the same percentage as gay folks in general... there are some ppl that feel weird about it, but mostly people have just understood that some people are gay and it doesn't affect anybody else so... you know... just you do you.

2nd q: Some female firefighters want to fuck their comrades, and they do. It's generally viewed as a bad thing, because it invites drama, but it happens. Plenty of female FFs just do their job like the rest of us.

Not literally, but I do love making and chilling with a good bonfire.

Fellow HFD b/ro here.
Just one question.
>Have you fucked Becca?

No. Does Becca have boobs? I like boobs. How can I touch them plz.

Location?

Houston.

Yes. You touch them by paying more than 5 minutes of attention to her.
She's a chubbster, but.....selection is scarce and the shifts are long.

Worst fire you've witnesseded

do you have to sleep at the station for x amount of days outta the month?

Mentioned worst fire experienced in above post.

Last year kicked butt at a gnarly apartment fire (3 alarm due to the size, but as 1st in engine had it extinguished on our own), found a very crispy young dude in bedroom, so that was sad.

Are you one of those fit FF or Obese pieces of shit?

Do you live for the job, or is it just something you do?

How long have you been doing it?

If you're a paramedic, you probably went through a certain school.
Grimsteads on deaths he's fyi

Ok op. Not joking here. I want to become a firefighter in the northeast.
I'm 19 right now and in college part time.
What do I have to do to be a firefighter? How do I start?
Also what can I expect as far as pay goes?

Do you guys really get a lot of poon?

We work 24 hr shifts, so we have beds, but never actually get to sleep more than an hour or two at a time before the next call comes in.

>Are you one of those fit FF or Obese pieces of shit?

Nah I stay in pretty good shape

>Do you live for the job, or is it just something you do?

Love it. Love going to work, love the people I work with, love everything about it.

>How long have you been doing it?
6 years

>If you're a paramedic, you probably went through a certain school.
Grimsteads on deaths he's fyi

Grimstead is a bad mofo. He is awesome.

Ever witness any people with crazy shit shoved up their ass?

Most of them are gay, haven't you paid attention?

This

Pay varies widely by department. Choose a schedule and run volume that suits you and go from there. If you already know this is what you want to do then go do it, no sense in waiting.

Short answer? Yes.

If you have to choose between a poon or a fire, what will it be?

Why do most of you talk big and bad, yet don't have the balls to actually fight when someone calls you on it?

I FAKIN NEW IT

Not up the ass, but a lady confessed that she needed to take her drugs out of her "kitty kat" before we took her to the hospital so they wouldn't be taken away

Cool
Did you do it for her?

Have you ever killed someone?

Depends on quality of poon....

Not gonna lie though, fighting a tough fire makes me REALLY want to fuck afterward, so they kind of go hand in hand.

Because you're too tough, we can tell we just can't beat you because your'e so super tough. Probably nobody could beat you.

With your mouth?

What is the best way to get the blood off your fists and clothes after persuading a girl to have intercourse?

Lucky you
Got a wife or just enjoying life?

fuckkkk no I don't want the herpes.

No, not even accidentally. I take my job super serious... so people die a lot, but I'll do what can be done to help.

Fire

Have you ever asked what is the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow?

How obvious are insurance fires?

With your own feces. Please shit all over yourself.

Divorced, single now. Not too bad.

+1

Thats deep OP

Then how do I get the feces off the blood off myself and her corpse, I mean her living body?

African, or European?

We have our suspicions sometimes, but that's a job for the arson investigators, who are really freaking good at their jobs.

That's what she said.

fellow houstonian what part of town sucks the most to you

Ugh do I have to tell you everything?

Cum. Lots of cum. If you can't make enough, ask a friend.

I've worked pretty much everywhere.

I hate galleria area the most bc there are a fuckton of wealthy assisted living centers there, whose residents call 911 constantly.

I was legitimately wondering douche....

>My sister is married to a FF, so They're often at our parties. Has happened at least 4 times.

>Talk about muh' firefights
>passively aggressively talk shit to a non firefighter
>Escalates
>Proceeds to back down and apologise/bitchout When said person is about to get physical with them.

All different people ,all times.

>I just want my parties to go without an incident, or to have an actual cool fight.Hence, why I asked you.

I couldn't beat my way out of a wet paper bag

Cum DOES NOT work, trust me, I know. It makes a pinkish-brown shiny glaze with the feces and blood.

Fukit, never mind, you are useless. Thanks for nothing.

What do you think of all the filthy, douchebag hajis that live in Sugarland? Any time I try to say hi or be friendly, they just grunt and give shitty looks.

Do you know who you're talking to? I'll have you know I graduated top of my fire class, and have been trained in at least 2 dozen forms of combat against fire.

I don't care how on fire you are, I could kick your ass 24 times before you even realized I was fighting you.

Get the fuck out of America, the land of the FREE and go back to probably australasia or wherever you think you're from, you pussy

Have you tried mixing the cum with blood?

Hm. Try hiding your swastika tattoos, and then see how they react?