What's your ideal bank robbery plan?

What's your ideal bank robbery plan?

>weapons
>gear
>getaway
>tactics

>current year
>still physically going to the bank to rob it.

>own bank
>get money
>invest in war
>get more money
>weapon of choice: the law
>tactics: use lobbyism and influence politics

Like the movie Quick Change but less comedy.

>weapons
A big black dildo
>gear
Leather crotchless trousers
>getaway
I dont
>tactics
I am a raging faggot and this is a sperm bank

>Wait years and years until perfect snow storm
>massive fucking blizzard
>takes out power
>Use snowmobile and go to bank
>Take out backup generators. Down go cameras.
>Que acetylene cutting torch
>snowmobile away while the blizzard covers my tracks
>profit???

Most underrated heist movie.

Most interesting one that I remember from Unsolved Mysteries was these guys tunneled in to the vault from a storm drain. They just waited for the bank to close, broke through, and loaded everything onto ATVs.

Assault rifles bulletproof vest armored car
Drive car into bank
Kill security
Team 1 takes hostages
Team 2 fires at police and gives situational intel
Team 3 gets money from the vault
Take hostages drive to secluded location leave hostages and set car on fire. Multiple getaway vehicles each team will take a different route to safehouse/private plane
The idea is to create as much chaos as possible to drain resources. Grenades and heavy weaponry would be good top.

>walk into bank
>"give me all money or your mother will die in her sleep tonight"
>hey can i put this money you just gave me into my account pls

Not bad but how do you plan on leaving the bank in a vehicle full of hostages without helicopter/air support following you the whole time?

>Handguns with large clips. Unmarked or stolen. I don't care where the source is an in all honesty I'll probably never fire them because that leaves evidence behind.
>Body armor under my clothes that isn't overly visible. Makeup to make me look like an entirely different person I'd also shave my head with a wig under it etc. This is to hide my face really well and not leave shit like hair behind. I might be cleanly shaven by I may have a fake beard or other things. Colored contacts, lighter or darker skin from the neck up etc. Think like jackass old man deal.
>I go find a bank with many escape routes/apartment complexes nearby etc. No traffic cams and whatnot. Location is key. I want to be out of the bank and in hiding before they know what hit them. No vehicles to get away but maybe a bike or on foot just far enough to get to a spot to change outfits and shit. I expect to be changed out and ready to go in no time.
>I will leave as quickly as possible but drive my vehicle away in the opposite direction from where I ran on foot. The face makeup should peel away so my identity is altered quickly.

Timing: From the moment I tell them this is robbery and give me your shit I expect them to have my money ready in 60 seconds before I run. I want to be away from the bank in the next 60 so by two minutes I want to be out of sight, changing and removing my costume mask and maybe changing my shirt and shoes in my car. By 3 minutes I want to be driving the other way ideally and have the money hidden away in a compartment in my car.

You're that buzzfeed guy, Mike from Outsmarted aren't you

when are you going to make your recorded practice actually pay off

That's where I hope splitting the teams and creating emergency situations will distract law enforcement
The problem isn't just news copter it's the police copter that will fire back. An rpg would be good, they won't send another one if the first goes down.

open for Stone Rose, get a transfer lf 10,000 usd for the verse, walk to the bank, withdraw $10,000 and walk out.

>weapons: mp like uzi or smth
>gear: rollerblade stuff helmet and backpack
>getaway: rollerblades
>tactics:
>become really good at rollerblading learning tricks and stuff
>find bank were you can jump behind the counter
>roll inside bank
>fire uzi at one of the banks employer so they know youre serious and fullfill your commands quick (also may prevent them from pressing the sillent alarm)
>jump behind counter and let them pack as much money as possible in a very short time into backpack (no time for tresor)
>fire rest of bullets anywhere on the way out and throw gun away (no use on the run and very suspicious if few blocks away)
>blade away fast (if police on main streets through the backjards)
>try to take a subway for a few stations (if city has subway)
>when about 2-3miles away change clothe and put money into another bag and go home

>get electricity powers
>fry everyone in the bank to a crisp
>fry the electrical lock on the vault
>take the money
>cause a power outage
>while the police are searching for you at night, kill every single one of them quietly with electricity

You gotta get in and out quickly. A hostage situation means the only way you’re getting out alive is by serving time in a federal pen.

The time it would take to get enough money to make it worthwhile the police will already start a blockade. The trick is to keep moving and kill kill kill. They use robots to kill holed up criminals because the police don't want to die. If you can prove they'll die by going after you their own survival instincts will work on your favor.

>shotguns
>Kevlar, masks
>park swap vehicle in multistory garage attached to a busy mall
>hit small bank with no lexan. Hit them on the first of the month in the morning. Get drawer cash only. Out in 60 seconds.

> Weapon
Laptop
> Gear
some comfy pants.
> Get away
What ever island you buy or houses you buy.
> tactics
Don't get caught.

Had it right.

>become banker

do a drive by with a crossbow, rope and harpoon kind of bolt. When the guy from the armored truck goes in or comes out (don't know which would have cash) you shoot the bag and drive off . Hopefully you don't hit the guard too.

No I’m some dickhead in Florida eating barbecue and studying medicine.

I don't need any plans,I'm a Jew.

> walk into bank
>walk up to younger male teller
>tell him you have a gun, you want his wallet and don't touch the alarm
>take wallet from him, photo his license and hand it back to him
>explain you just texted his picture and address to accomplice
>explain that even if I don't make it out, your friend will find you and kill you
>money only. any dye packs will result in my friend finding you and killing you
>someone is watching the bank. if cops show up within 10 minutes my friend will find you and kill you
>have a nice day

wow, an actual viable plan

>2017
>expects us experienced pros
>to do his homework for him
>foolish user

>alibi is everything
>use doubles on public transport carrying your cellphone to put your apparent location in another city at the point in time

Implying the government doesn't put you under the jail for that.

With a keyboard you fucking idiot

>>use doubles on public transport carrying your cellphone to put your apparent location in another city at the point in time
I like this point a lot. The downside is you've just doubled the amount of people who potentially know about your crime, no? I suppose not if you do proper compartmentalization and the doubles don't know WHY they're doing what they're doing.

I still feel like they're a loose end somehow. The person who finds and "hires" the doubles also can't be directly involved in the robbery. Otherwise their connection defeats the whole purpose of having doubles.