Late night psychology thread...

Late night psychology thread. Post me your problems and I will attempt to explain why you are this way and how to fix it. I'm not a doctor, don't expect a miracle.

Other urls found in this thread:

ted.com/talks/andrew_solomon_depression_the_secret_we_share?language=en
twitter.com/AnonBabble

>can't sleep

don't give me any chat about that warm milk shit

Could you be stressed or depressed, or more general insomnia?

Everyone I know, knows my thoughts and all things I wish them not to know. There is no privacy I'm my life and I move forward aimless and disparaged.

I'm really into traps

That's kind of vague. What do you mean? How do people learn these things you wish to keep private?

What about it? Do you see this as a problem or something you want to change?

Synchronicities and delusions that have no origin

That sounds very complex and hard to live with. The only advice I can give you is to seek therapy, user.

Turn off your blueteeth

I've been seeing a therapist on and off for about 5 years.
I'm somewhat functional, right now doing my master's degree and stuff like that, but I still suffer from anxiety, even get some light panic attacks. manageable, but panic attacks nonetheless.
Would it be a good idea to start looking for a psychiatrist?

Yes, I'd say so. I've read that anxiety is caused by excess adrenaline, so it would make sense to me that a good workout routine would also likely help.

Alright. I know what's exactly wrong with me.

But....How does one recover from child abuse?
I'm still highly uncomfortable/afraid around men. What should I do?

That sounds really complex. Are you a man or a woman?

...

I keep crying at night because I'm 5'7
I wish I where 6'0 but I'm now 22
What should I do?

Stop crying

I don't feel masculine enough
I have an hairy body, a lot of fat and muscle, even a beard but still don't feel manly

Male. Fathers been out of my life since the age of 11, he's currently in jain, expect not to see or hear from him for 5 more years min.

Honestly, it doesn't matter. Height is only a detriment if you make it one. Sup Forums may make it seem like these superficial attributes are everything, but in the real world most people don't care. Take it from me, I'm 20 and only 5'5".

It may sound cliche, but it's true. Confidence is everything.

Ok op, I like this chick and have been fri3nds with her for over 4 years now, I still haven't really found a way to tell her, and I get worked up about telling her and never act on it... then repeat until I'm ded... WUT do

So it's like, I want to fall in love again, because of those lovely feelings, yet I'm afraid of rejection and having things fail if they progress.

tell her I guess, try not to giggle too much

...

Take up hobbies that let you build or create things. Woodworking is a favorite of mine. Casually date women, just to see how it goes. Meet men who share your hobbies and interests, and make friendships.

Being a man is about having confidence, integrity, a good work ethic, and the desire to leave things better than you found them. Pursue that kind of lifestyle and mentality and I sincerely believe you will feel better.

Not OP but make that move before it's too late. If you don't you could easily be waking up years later hating yourself for not doing so. That pain will be far greater than the pain of being rejected.

i'm 6'2 and am a kissless virgin, height doesn't do fucking anything trust me

Basically I've reached the point tho where if I bring it up she might start to question if I became friends with her for this singular reason... I mean it is but she thinks it's a totally cool "healthy" relationship

Honestly, I would write him a letter and/or try to visit him. It might help to discuss this face to face, as tough as that might sound.

It also might take the edge off if you work out, build some muscle and learn a fighting style. It will give you some confidence. Feeling like you can handle yourself might help relieve the anxiety.

But everything you do will be interpreted as overcompensating. Might as well commit suicide if everyone's going to think that.

Not OP.
Shoot your shot man.
If shit goes wrong, talk it out, and usually a rejection killa the feelings.
Worst case i see maybe just awkwardness for a month.

Never seen it like that, thanks user

Very anxious all the time. Can't ttalk to anyone outside of my home without getting tongue tied and getting very nervous. My face turns red and my hearing goes. I don't want to live, but I don't want to an hero either. I'm a nervous wreck, I can't do anything right. I'm the most loathed person at my job. I'm useless to everyone, just a detriment. I can't form a romantic relationship with anyone. I am only attracted to woman much older than me. Talking like 20 years older.
I'm so depressed and anxious I can't do anything except go to work and come back home. I'm a fucking miserable excuse for a human, and I'm only 19.

You should just go for it. Be honest but don't lay it on too thick. And most importantly, if it doesn't go well, don't worry too much about it. It's easy to get tunnel vision when you like a girl, but there are tons of women out there you could be happy with. You just have to meet them.

Np man, best of luck to you

So don't do it to compensate. You need to get out of the mentality that your height is an issue.

Too depressed to do that
I don't even care about sex, too depressed for that

The therapists will just tell you to kill yourself so it's no use spending money to see the therapist. Better to just do it ahead of time

That sounds very severe. You need to talk to a therapist, user.

i don't care about sex either but i want to know what it feels like to be loved, and height doesn't help in the fucking slightest.

Wut

I already have been for a year. She's gorgeous, but I don't want her sexually.

You just have to do it. There's not much else to it. You should just casually date a couple of women, don't take it too seriously, and see how things go.

Alright op. Ill think about it.
I do not want to contact him though. It would be tough, but he feels he never did anything wrong. He doesnt know that hes done this. Severly Bipolar. If i were to, what would i say? Or talk about?

Also I am beefy enough and have been taught to fight. I'm not physically insecure, TBH there's not very much insecurity in the ability to protect myself.

For more info. If I'm one on one conversation with a man, like perhaps a teacher, i feel my heart racing, and i begin to grow anxious, and worried. If im with others, i feel okay, or not that scared.

I can't stand being around, trusting, or conversing with others. I especially dislike having to rely on someone. This goes for every social situation, especially in an educational environment; I won't trust, talk to, or request for assistance from that person or others. I genuinely dislike people, but not overtly so.

I also cannot justify lying to others to myself as that would make me like the people I dislike. A hypocrite. Pleasantries are acceptable, but beyond that I become sick.

How do I exist in a society where others are, statistically, awful and still be truthful to myself and others regardless of the scenario.

I still got "growing up" to do, let's see if I can make it another year without killing myself. I rely on substances too much.

I'm You should see a therapist user, it gets better, you'll be able to handle it, trust me. It still gets hard sometimes, but you're stronger that this.
I'm doing quite good at my masters, top of my class, I do still get this hard feelings sometimes that I'm a fraud and I'm not worth anything, but it's manageable. I've even been able to at least hit on girls, something I would've never even imagined doing before.
It's a hard process, but nothing you can't handle, easier than the way you've been living this whole time.

The low down: I know a girl for 4 years, like her and become almost bro/sis and hesitant to ask

It might help to see a psychiatrist about it. These are deep-seated issues. There isn't going to be a perfect answer.

If he's bipolar and thinks he did nothing wrong, then perhaps it's best not to contact him. It's up to you, whether or not you think it would help. I honestly have no idea what you should say, as that conversation would probably be very personal.

It doesn't matter if I'm doing anything to overcompensate, the final verdict will be that I'm overcompensating. Why bother living?

I already do man, I have been for a year. We're talking about getting me on medication soon. She was really adamant about it, but she said that if I wasn't going to try do better myself naturally then I should start thinking about medication.

>I don't want her sexually.
lel ty for info

Do you feel like you understand people well, or are you somewhat out of touch or awkward?

>be me a couple years back.
>decent love life. Shitty dead end retail job. Got weed so... who cares. Amirite?
>lose shit job suddenly.
>financially crumbling. Possibly going to lose house.
>Activate fallback plan.
>join US Army
>miss home and fiance a lot but otherwise going pretty good.
>Get married when I get home.
>both of us always working. Never see each other
>I try my best to make time. She doesn't [says she's does]
>sex is virtually non existent now. As is any bonding.
>thinking about jumping ship after 6 yrs together.

And psychological help.... GO!

What things have you tried to help you deal with the anxiety? I'm not OP but I can give some advice as to things you could try before diving into more serious medication. Regular exercise is definitely a good starting point. It actually has a pretty significant impact on anxiety and depression.

Thanks for you effort my man
Shits rough, I got my own mental issues too, but i appreciate you trying.

Ill try to see a therapist or something soon.

I mean I thought it was necessary due to me saying that I'm attracted exclusively to older woman.

just ask or don't, commit
why are you torturing yourself

OP here, still 5'5". People don't see me as overcompensating. I meet girls who are genuinely attracted to me. I make friends with people. I'm telling you right now that Sup Forums has warped your perception. The real world is not like that. Every single person is physically imperfect in some way or another, and the vast majority of people don't scrutinize these things very much if at all. If you act weird and make a lot of self-deprecating jokes about your height, people will think you're insecure, but other than that they likely won't think anything of it.

My (ex?) girlfriend of three years told me she is not feeling like she is being her "true self". She feels stuck and doesn't want to live in our apartment. She's been struggling with anxiety for almost half her life, and lately depression as well. She broke up with me, but called me a few days later and said she doesn't want for it to be over and that she loves me. She doesn't want to move back in right away, but suggested she could maybe just come over sometimes. I voiced my opinion and said I would wish for her to come back.

What's going on? Does she want to end it, is she just keeping me on ice?

Well, it took me quite a lot to get better, maybe the first 2 1/2 years were fucking hard, therapy felt extremely painful, but I knew I had nothing else to try, except kill myself.. so I kept on going..

don't feel bad if you might need some help from meds, whatever makes you get better is good.

ted.com/talks/andrew_solomon_depression_the_secret_we_share?language=en

You need to talk this out with her. People change over time. You've likely changed. Explore your relationship and figure out if you're still attracted to each other.

Seems like something related to her anxiety. I don't really know what you should do. Mental issues are a pain in the ass.

I have anxiety which leads to insomnia and I have had sex with 1 niece and Im getting close to another.

I've an alright grasp on people; not anything akin to a "true" socialite. For example, I went out and had drinks in a group of people I barely knew and did well with no drawn out awkward silences. I even got a job offer from one of them that owned a popular restaurant in the area.

A tad out of touch sure, but who doesn't have their own quirks; it's what makes people themselves. I just like to pick other's minds for everything they know to see how much I can find out.

It's not the social aspect that draws these feelings of mistrust and disgust; rather the near transparency (or what I perceive as lucid) of their malicious malcontent.

Sounds like she has some serious issues to work out. You should encourage her to seek help. She might want to be with you, but she might also be clinging on to feelings that aren't really there.

Your underlying message is "I am blameless".

>talk it out with her
I've tried. A lot of times actually. She tends to defend her own actions of not being home by stating bills need to be paid. Which I can't argue with but it doesn't make me any less lonely.

I've been trying to emotionally remove myself from this relationship but I'm still hurt and still trying for some reason. Entire reason I'm a milfag is because of trying to support us.

Hey I'm not really sure if I have actual psychological problems. It's probably very easy to blow up adolescent events out of proportion to have some emotional baggage you can cling onto. Nonetheless, here's my story.

I'm an 18 y/o swedish guy. I just quit smoking weed but will probably start again as I've smoked since 14 regularly. I've never been in an relationship and never had sex even though I look ok. I know I look ok because I've been very close to both sex and relationships, I have been on dates etc. but I just flee from it eventually.

I sit at my computer constantly. Obviously affecting my life in negative ways but I can't stop using the computer completely because I think my life will be better off if I work as a programmer. Regulating computer use is hard.

Ok so computer and weed are the two things affecting me negatively now most likely, and these things play at least some role in these symptoms:
Very sad
Sexually weird
Socially robotic
Issues with women (?)

This post is a preface to the actual meat of the story, traumas, which I think is the reason for the reasons of my symptoms. I will post that as a reply to this

people say im smart, and apparently I am because my grades arent that bad. But I do dumb shit behind my parents backs, and ive been doing it since a young age. Teenage rebellion and shit yeah yeah, but it makes me feel really bad, because the shit I do (drugs, Ive bought stuff from someone who jumped a kid, e.t.c) really fucks me up as a person, and I have no idea why im this fucked up. Dont come with shit like "talk to your parents" because I cant. Were a happy family, a very happy one, but Ive had a history with lying to them, and I cant see my mom being torn apart like that... I dont even expect any help from this, maybe just some encouragement, or nothing I dont really care, it just felt good to write this all out.

It sounds like you've had some bad experiences with people. A healthy social life, in my opinion, is one where you have a network of trustworthy people who care about you earnestly.

You should try to find more people that you genuinely admire, and make an effort not to look down on people who don't share your honest heart.

Well I did tried regular exercise for a while, to be honest, at that time I had some issues with the start up I created, I was in the middle of having to close it down, and had some very angry clients calling me constantly, so I would have some of those light panic attacks even at the fucking gym.

I started my masters and I haven't been able to get my shit 100% together, so I start getting behind on things I have to do, which results on me delivering assignments not the way I would like them to be, which makes me feel like I'm a fraud and worthless, which gives me even more anxiety.

It' so fucking hard, feels like an ongoing cycle I can never get out of.

So, exercising regularly, has helped overall with the anxiety? even you know.. whenever it happens it's not like you can suddenly go for a run.

I hate myself and I'm depressed because of it, I've let down many people which makes me feel like shit. I'm feeling fucking worthless, I'm angry and sad about it.

how old?
were you her first?

As much as I'd like to say that I'm a perfect messiah who never did any wrong, I'm aware of my coldness, lack of emotion, and my distancing from others due to these borderlines paranoid feelings of impending betrayal.

I'd simply like to understand my sins and correct them. Remember, this is all internal and I'm trying to know myself better, but I appreciate the input and will take it into consideration

Honestly, you're probably at the point where you need to give her an ultimatum. A healthy relationship is not just two people propping eachother up financially.

Do you feel you have a general dislike for authority?

I would sell my soul to the devil to be taller
But I haven't seen the devil

Very good, I can appreciate the response. On the nose with bad experiences (from beatings to vindictive women).

I'll keep that in mind; it is easy to forget that others are human and can be good people. Being on a high pedestal can put distance from others who might have the same thoughts. I'll try and project the qualities I want in others, but speaking and acting the absolute truth is not working.

Since no one has said it yet, thank you for taking the time to converse with others about some of their issues.

You're inflating the value of height. It's nothing. It's not an indicator of masculinity. It's not the pinnacle of attractiveness. It's not a sign of superior genes, or intelligence, it's nothing. It's just a thing you're born with. You can use your voice, your attitude, your clothes, your physique, all these things that you can shape and mold, and be whatever kind of person you want.

Think about this in a broad, all-encompassing way: what kind of person do you want to be?

ok so basically here's extremely short versions of all my traumas, I think:

Other traumas:
1. When I was 12 I was almost in a relationship with a girl in my class. she had moderate issues apparently and had etched the first letter of my name "H" in to her arm and told me about it and that it stood for my name. A few days passed and I took a fucking scalpel and cut her letter in my arm but way bigger. Instanly regret decision. Cover up wound but she makes the calculation and finds out. Stop talking to her and she got problems with anorexia and cutting herself immensely, as well as taking on extreme leftist beliefs.

Sexual traumas:
2. Ok this is a weird one.... will continue in another post

I want to be like... Jason Momoa or the mountain
But those are tall dudes
I don't really care if being tall doesn't mean masculinity or intelligence is something I just want

No problem. I've seen a lot of things in my life and I enjoy using my experiences to help people.

How do you justify this to yourself? Do you have some deeper reason to want to be tall?

Sexual traumas are so fucking shameful cant even type it. honestly. wtf.

Stay great, Champ. You're doing God's work.

People here want to help. No worries, user.

I know I haven't replied, but I'm reading what you're writing.

Yes: my cousins are taller than me, also my friends and even a lot of girls I know
Almost everyone is taller than me and it makes feel so bad that sometimes I think about suicide I can't stand a whole life like this
I really cried when I become 18 because I knew I would be as tall as I wanted to be
Idk why, I mean I didn't drink alcohol or do drugs and always consumed a lot of milk because I fucking love milk

You are projecting your hostility onto others.
Hostility/suspicion towards others is not irrational and in today's world of increased transparency and sharing (because of internet and smartphones), we're essentially crowded, crawling on top of each other, even without increased population, and every moment of your life could be recorded and the records accessed at any time and used against you.
More people are a threat to you, to different degrees and different ways, than ever before.
You want to take without giving or losing.
This is basic and universal, but best done surreptitiously. It never works if you explicitly state this unless you're a sexy young woman.
You want to be a ghost that can do things to others but cannot be accessed or observed.
This is the most advantageous situation to be in. But not obtainable except in fantasy and seclusion.

Why do I want to fuck so many sluts when I have a wonderful caring gf and is it normal to want to break up just to fuck around ?

I very heavily procastinate with nearly everything I do, when it comes to getting ready or doing homework or chores.

Help

Everyone in my family is taller than me. My father was 6'2". Somehow I ended up 5'5". From elementary to high school, almost everyone I knew was taller than me. I've been bullied for it before.

The only thing you can do is disregard it. Your height is beyond your control. If you cling to it, put this facet of genetics on a pedestal, it will hurt you for your whole life. You have to recognize that it's not important.

The adult world pays little mind to what yoy were born with. What people truly respect is what you're capable of. Intelligence, fitness, social adeptness, kindness. These are things you are in control of, and if you learn how to improve these aspects in yourself, you'll have a lot more respect and self-worth than anyone who happens to be 6ft.

Sack up. You have a bad work ethic, and there is no easy way to correct that. You just have to bust ass and build up a tolerance for doing things that aren't fun.

I haven't been bullied for my height because no one that knows me knows how important is height to me
Well only my mother
But it's easier for you because you don't care while it is almost one of the most important things to me

Is your girlfriend good in bed? Does she let you express your fetishes and sexual "personality?"

I like to befriend potential killers.. Basically. Or just really messed up people that others would just look down upon. I don't want them to kill me or anything. I just genuinely care about people. Even the "worst" kinds of people need someone to talk to. Someone that gives a shit. Analyze that toots lol

>Analyze that toots lol
u female?

I have a big circle of friends, few close true friends.

spend all my money on expensive designer clothes and diet

have a girlfriend but cheat on her frequently.

go out almost everynight have fun in the moment, but it goes away almost immediately and I always feel depressed during or after.

But even though I have a rewarding and more than active social life, I don't want any of it.

I have this urge or desire to just completely isolate myself.

I just want to live in a comfy cabin lie down in a bed turn on a tv for background noise

All I want more than anything is to curl up in a bed and never leave it

I have this yearning to be completely alone.

I've already started chasing women significantly less and I'm cutting people out of my life left and right.

I wish I could get more fullfilment from my social life, but it's never enough. It never lasts, and when I'm out partying or just hanging out, in the end I just wish I was at home doing nothing.

Your right man, I plainly feel like I'm not good enough for anything and nothing's worth doing. I don't have a real motive for anything. Is there anything that i can take away from my environment and/or help me improvise my mindset?

But not caring is simply a choice I made. I used to care a lot, but as I started to try and improve my self, sharpen my intelligence and build my body, I slowly stopped worrying about things outside my control and instead decided that I would strive to make myself the best, most capable person I could be.