Help...please

Help...please.

Hey guys. Knowing Sup Forums, this is probably the wrong place to ask for help, but I don't know where else to turn.

To make it short. I have an extreme phobia of roaches, and I'm staring one down right now in my bedroom.

I'm cool with spiders, centipedes, pretty much anything insect except these abominable fucking roaches.

I'm sitting in bed with my iPhone, a broom, and Stephen Hawking's A Brief History of Time in case the opportunity arises where I can throw a book at it. Right now the thing is sitting in a corner doing nothing. I have a clear shot to take it out with the broom handle but I'm too chicken shit to go for the kill because I'm afraid I'll miss.

I'm at the end of my rope here. Even some emotional support and motivation will at least help a little. Help an user out?

The thing is in between the white shelves.

Have you tried getting treatment for the phobia or something? I have a phobia of bees and it fucking sucks as well. Good luck, user

I hear ammonia and bleach is really effective at killing roaches just make sure you seal the room to make sure it can't escape.

I'm in college and I don't really have the money.

My phobia's weird too. I'm skittish around roaches if I'm outside, but not to the point where I'm freaking out like I am now. It's when they catch me off guard that it's the worst.

Thanks for the support. Good luck with your phobia

Broom won’t kill it. Gotta drop book on it then stand on book. Fuckers are hard to kill... Cleanup is worst. I would just let it go. Once you see one, there’s probably hundreds in walls.

Kek

I hear that too, but I'm all the way on the 3rd floor and all that shit's on the 1st (live in a row home). I might go for some spray afterwards to prevent the fuckers from coming in in the first place.

Well mustard gas is effective at killing most organisms, op included.

Of course you might just be trying to kill me, as to be expected from you guys. Thanks though for responding

If you don't like roaches maybe you should consider not being such a slob.

I was thinking about shoving the end of the handle into it.

play some blood pumping music that puts you rock hard, like you feel invencible and the more powerful creature ever existed, and smash that shit with your shoes

Not really a slob. Everything is fairly organized actually. Just live in an old ass house we got from granny when she passed.

lmao this pussy is afraid of a roach. Just fucking stomp on it dude.
I have a phobia of needles but I get stabbed by them all the time.

hopefully it hides till you go to sleep then goes in search of the food particles in your mouth

No problem. Glad to help

Dude, I'm blasting the Doom 2016 Soundtrack as we speak.

What are you a heroine addict or do you just donate a lot of blood?

THEN THINK YOU ARE THE FUCKING DOOMGUY AND KILL THAT ROACH WITH YOUR BARE HANDS LIKE IT IS A DEMON
kek

Go buy a mouse. Let it loose in your house. Be very clean and don't leave food out. The mouse will eat 100 roaches a day. Best pest control in the world.

Throw smaller books to guide it into the open so you can crush it with all the force of Stephen Hawkings' weaponised wheelchair (and you can't tell me he doesn't have some hidden machine gun james bond shit in there)

Alright! ALRIGHT I CAN DO THIS!!! I'M GOING FOR THE FUCKER NOW! Let you guy know on the situation. Maybe even take a death photo!

RAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!

GOD SPEED YOU MAGNIFICENT BASTARD

Go buy some borax in the store and sprinkle it around

check ups.

Get Maxforce roach gel. it's made by Bayer and comes in a syringe and you apply the product on wall bottom corners. Roaches are a nuisance and will crawl in any crack and reproduce quite fast and spread around. Don't bother with pest control services like Orkin, they are useless and are there for the money. I bought Maxforce and got rid of those nasty bugs in just over a week. Basically the roach eats the gel and it dies then other roach will start eating their fellow and so on until they all kill each other.

doesn't work, not even if you mix it with peanutbutter or syrup.

FUCKING KILL IT WITH FIRE

IT'S TOO FUCKING LATE AND YOU'RE SO FUCKING FUCKED. IT PROBABLY LAID EGGS IN THE WALLS, CARPETS, CURTAINS....EVEERRRYYTHHIINGGGG

KILL...IT...WITH...FIRE...

Sorry OP, it's over for you.

Makes sense. Tfw you are poor fag and don't have health insurance.

HOLY FUCK I GOT IT!!

I couldn't have done this without you an the rest of this thread (even the mean heroin addict made me chuckle). Now all I have to do is vacuum it up.

VICTORY

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECH

...

Fuck quote wrong person. Refer to

Well threads over. It's been a fun ride.

Probably right. Like i said, we inherited a messed up, old ass house so it had everything from bedbugs to mice to this. I'm just trying fight one battle at a time.

Awww...I'll miss you guys. This is the first time in a long time I've been on Sup Forums.

If you guys got any good insect prevention tips (inb4 clean your filthy room you dirty motherfuck), let me know.

>guys, I have a fear of vacuums, how do I do this part?!

So why don't you just bomb it with that spray stuff? It's a win-win:
A) You kill anything in there pretty much
B) You get a dope ass limited edition Clown skin for your house.

I, might as well, save this thread for the future generations

I'll paypal you $500 if you catch it and eat it alive

t. richfag

Gentrol, look it up, haven't seen a roach in 3 years

I might when daybreak hits. I have some insect repellent stuff downstairs but I don't know how safe it is to breath in (since, you know I'm going to be sleeping in here).

Oh, I guess I'm too late.

just smack the damn thing dead before it runs away and lays eggs in your cereal boxes. im no fan of getting up on a big roach either, but it's preferable to having my house infested with several hundred more.

Mustard gas user here. With mice I wouldn't recomend conventional mouse traps they are usually only effective for one mouse and it's done and with poison may kill them but there is no guarantee you will find it's body. I would recommend pic related it kills multiple mice at once pretty effectively. Also with bed bugs though out your furniture they are fucked. After that insect bomb the shit out of your house.

Throw out furniture I mean.

>picture saved
That's pretty fucking ingenious...
>webm is your reward

OP here. I'll take the bucket trap into consideration. Thanks for the knowledge.

Shit, almost forgot my reward to you guys for helping me.

Here ya go. Name's Lady Sonia.

Yeah when I had mouse problem in my shop I put a couple in there with a washer in the middle with penut butter on it so that they have to climb over the washer and it throws them off balance also make sure you have a good sized bucket so they can't just reach the bait from the edges.

How much water do you put in there?

Enough to drown them but not enough for them to climb out. I just filled mine half way.

If you rent, landlords problem. Health code violation. If not. Exterminator. No money? Get to Lowe’s, Home Depot, buy some shit. Seal cracks, etc.

And if you are an animal lover and don't want to kill them you don't have to put water in it if the bucket is deep enough, next morning you can release them far away. But I hate mice so fuck them.

Much appreciated

...

Yes O.P good for you conquering the gauntlet thrown down by your phobia. Also, consider watching Wall-e eh?

Get a blowgun

who the fuck is this

Increible.

Is that you John Wayne?
>I know. You're welcome.

Who is she ?

Who?