So I'm gonna try and keep this relatively short as i need advice quickly. My gf and i have been together for 2.5 years but still haven't been offical bf/gf yet because she's "scared of commitment". Our distance apart is only 4 hours by car so not a far drive at all. Every time the past month I've asked to come over and hang out she never seems enthused about it and says "maybe". She also never asks me to come over and never seems like she really even misses me. Well this week I asked on Monday if i could come by this weekend and she said the usual maybe. So i asked again Thursday to no avail and finally Friday comes along and she says "Not this weekend I have things going on and I'm busy" now earlier in the week I asked what her plans we're and she said maybe Watching the football game. Now instead yesterday she stayed at her guy friends house with him and his brother until midnight playing video games and today went a partied for the game and is about to go to another party afterwords. In essence she blew me off this weekend to hang out with this guy friend that she sees every week even though we haven't seen eachother in a month. I get the sinking feeling she's cheating on me with him. What do you think? I can't believe she'd blow me off after a month of not seeing eachother to go party with this guy.
So I'm gonna try and keep this relatively short as i need advice quickly. My gf and i have been together for 2...
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I'm also just gonna post general bullshit until I get some advice so excuse the samefagging
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she is a slut dump her before you get a std or before you give her a reason to collect child support
You're damn right she's cheating on you. Find proof (or fabricate it) and use it to humiliate her publically. Rip the Band-Aid off man, "afraid of commitment" means you're cute enough for FWB but not boyfriend material.
That is something I'd never thought I'd see in my life. Kinda disappointed they're not both involved.
Alright man, listen up.
She is not into you. Fuck off.
If she by any chance talks to you, tell her you can't keep doing this, and that you feel this is not fair for you. Stop talking to her, but reply when she does.
If she doesn't, you can now move on.
Firstly lemme check those dubs. Second, do you guys think i should text her while she's out saying look im pissed off and we need to talk? Or should i just not text her at all the rest of the night?
I am literally the only person to reply something and you can't read what I just said? Do not text her. Do. Not. Text. Her.
If she wants to talk to you, she knows how to reach you.
no faggot you delete her number and get rid of all of her shit and move on to the next girl
You're right. I wrote out that message when i got your reply and figured I'd add you in. I think I'm hitting my limit here boys
wrong. dont even talk to her or waste anymore time thinking about her. why? because you, someone that cares, got blown off by her, so she could suck some other dudes cock. why would you waste another second, thought, breath on a chunk of meat? there is at least 100 more girls out there that are twice as hot, loving, caring, and fuckable out there.
Doesn't matter.
Leave and do something else or just go to sleep. 2/7 of your life is the fucking weekend, it doesn't matter if you waste this saturday.
But listen to me, this is not just for today. You are not to make contact until she reaches our to you.
And he only can talk, fuck or go out with one woman? Kill yourself my man.
she's into him, but he doesn't have what she wants, which is either something to do with the dick or money 99% of the time. women are fucking shallow and will spend all time of day around people they aren't into, just to get what they want
no? take your own advice; he can talk and fuck them all
See I've had a conversation before with her about how that worries me and about all that shit. Basically layed it out plain and clear. She told me she was "committed" to me and that we we're "exclusive" But her blowing me off this weekend just to go party has me dumbfounded. Would I be fucked to just drop it? She's coming back over to this side of the mountains in a few days and we planned on seeing eachother. But this has me fucked up, why would she think this is fine?
She blew him off after a month of not meeting. She doesn't seem to be interested.
Either way, the solution isn't texting her.
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.. never said the solution was texting her..
she blew him off after a month because she found someone else to use.. she was and is interested, just not as interested as she is in someone else with a better dick or fatter wallet.. in other words, can the fucking cunt and if she tries to crawl back after she gets rejected by Chad, tell her to fuck off..
He can talk with her, but texting her now would be desperate.
>She told me she was "committed" to me and that we we're "exclusive"
>"committed"
>"exclusive"
lel
It's not fine, which is why I am telling you to not text her now, fucker.
If she wants to talk with you, she will. As it is right now I don't see commitment. You aren't dating.
Ya thats kinda shitty. You should probably just end it tbh.
btw.. didn't even read past the first sentence and already knew.. stereotypical cunt story..
Eh, that's a good point.
I just think she is just not into him anymore because she found someone better. It happens a lot with woman nowadays.
talking to her at all at this point would be pointless, unless he really wants to get with a girl that just wants money and sex.... in other words.. there's a million other girls in the world and you want to waste another second on that cunt?
I would do it. Have an excess of time and have cash I am not using, and I am assuming she is hot.
You do have a good point though
Exactly. I say she's still into him, but only in the sense that she is leaving the door open if she changes her mind.. ie.. chad doesnt work out.. or he becomes a millionaire..
Guys I'm all sorts of fucked right now. Part of me just wants to end it because this weekend seriously bothers me and that she never shows any excitement for me. but the other part of me is stuck on her sweet side and how i love her. She's done some good for me but also this past two months has thrown me into hell. Literally to the point of getting referred to a psychiatrist.
He also lives 4 hours away. I once split up with a girl because she lived 20 miles away
>but also this past two months has thrown me into hell. Literally to the point of getting referred to a psychiatrist.
You should have started there.
Text her saying it's over. I am not even kidding. You will feel better after a few days.
So you'd waste money on a shallow bitch when you could find a half decent women that'll treat you as an equal and not use you for cash?
It's already ended, unless you become/have/get what she wants, and even THEN, she is still a using cunt, and doesn't deserve you.
Break up with her if she is putting you through all that pain. No point in continuing to be with someone who makes you unhappy.
Some people like the notsolong distance relationship deal. I don't understand it myself.
We talk the same language man, I hope you are having a good life so far.
I would look for a decent woman while I fuck this one, yes.
You do know where you are posting, right?
>You do know where you are posting, right?
Yeah.. kek
>I would look for a decent woman while I fuck this one
My exact point; just don't spend any money on her, love her, or waste a thought/breath on her.
Bump for more angryposting so I can feel stronger about this fucking bullshit
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She would be like an escort you know.
Is that really that bad? Seems like a pretty good deal to me.
Fuck off nigger.
Any more advice my dudes? Or anyone to conversate with?
I am down to talk.
What other advice can you possibly need, though? Just drop her.
Thank you man. And honestly I don't really know what advice I need because you're correct. I don't know i feel like I might just be over reacting? I talked to her about communication, how I feel like i'm not a priority and all that to her two weeks ago. And for a few days it seemed to perk up. Should I give it more time for her to work out the kinks? Honestly she blew me off this weekend right? Because that's certainly how it feels
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She did blow you off. Probably blew the other dude. I would just drop her, honestly.
The thing I have an issue with is how little effort she is doing, which is one of the main things an actual partner needs to make.
You are asking her multiple times to go see her; how often does she go to see you? How often does she initiate things and tries to help and things like that?
She never comes to see me. Granted it's only been two months she's been away. Her reasoning is that "If Im coming to that side of the mountains I'll want to see my parents" Even though she could just come stay at my house the enitre weekend. I live alone so fuck it why not right? And she never initiates anything with me. She doesn't hardly ever text first, hardly says i love you first, never asks about my day never asks about my life and honestly when we're texting she never really even tries to continue conversation just replies to my follow up questions with a couple words.
When we video chat however she asks a couple more questions and seems slightly more engaged.
I think you just found your answer right there.
Just drop her man. She made you feel like shit (multiple times, I am sure).
I would tell you that she will regret it when she finds out what she lost, but regret requires either age or wisdom, which she might not have.
It's still bullshit. You do more than 75% of the relationship work. She does not values you, and probably doesn't respect you.
I would never blow off someone I respect like that.
dude it doesn't even matter if she's cheating on you (kinda sounds like she is but maybe not) because she is pretty obviously not super interested in the first place. doesn't call you, doesn't want to hang out, ect. Don't be with someone who doesn't want to be with you, you'll be miserable.
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You guys are right it's total bullshit that I'm the only one who seems to be putting anything into the relationship. And I've told her that I feel as if i'm not a priority and that I'm just a side project. And here's the part that fucks with me about this guys. Her response was that she loves me more than anyone and wants to be with me and cares about me. Even offered to pay for the doctor if i needed to go to therapy. She has told me a few times that I'm the one she wants to be with. Should I try and talk things out with her first? I mean I've talked about my feelings with her before as I've said in the thread but then she does shit like this. I really want this relationship to work but she's not putting in any effort seemingly at all
Doesn't sound like a healthy relationship. I've been in a similar situation a few years ago, and she was cheating on me. Not saying your 'gf' is cheating or anything, but you're obviously not wanted. Best would be to 'break up', for your own good. Simply tell her you're not feeling wanted and that you've decided to part way. She'll either freakout and tell you the truth, or feel sorry and try to repair whatever bad she done. At that point you need to play it cool and walk on. You'll find someone better one day, trust me OP.
Alright, so you want to make this work.
Do not text her until she texts you, but when she does talk with her as per usual.
Do not tell her "when I can come over". When (if) she asks, tell her that you can't, that she has to be the one that comes. Make up some excuse as to why (Not enough money for gas because you are saving, fucked up tire, whatever).
Let's see what happens when she has to take the initiative. If she doesn't, you'll know for sure that she is lying about being with you. And the money thing for therapy is nice and all, but throwing money at something doesn't mean you are invested, maybe she just wants to keep you around
I took way to long to respond I know. But god damn. I want to make things work yes but in all honesty this whole partying all wekkend and blowing me off just has me floored. It's like she just threw everything away for nothing and that she doesn't care about me at all. Should I even try to talk this out?
What do you want to do man? I wouldn't, but we are not the same person.
Maybe she cares for you but she is selfish, which means you don't want to date her.
All I know is that you are doing way too much to save the relationship. You will burn out and resent her if this keeps going, and you will blame yourself afterwards. It just isn't fair.
In all honesty I don't know. I want to talk to her and see what sort of excuse she has and she if she's genuinely remorseful after she knows how i feel about what she's currently doing. But part of me just wants to straight up tell her how fucked this feels and how fucked she's acting and then just go from there. It's fucked that she would tell me she's too busy to hang out with me after not seeing eachother for a month then just go party all weekend. right?
This you fucking idiot.
It's only fucked only if you have a relationship, which I don't think you guys actually have. Women can do much worse than that, believe you me.
It understandable that you want closure, but keep in mind that it might not even be worth your time. At this point it's up to you.
At least it seems that now you know that what she is doing to you isn't healthy, which is progress.
don't listen to that other guy saying not to talk to her. if you want to hash it out, tell her. say hey you never really call me, you're never excited to see me, I see you hanging out with other guys instead of me, but you still tell me you love me, what's the fucking deal? you wanna do this or not basically.
it should go without saying but don't fucking text her any of this, just tell her you want to talk about shit and have a heart to heart in person. if she doesn't want to meet up or doesn't text you back you've already got your answer, move on.
guys its obvious that OP is too much of a pussy to straight up dump her even when being solid advice to straight up dump her
[spoiler]i was in the same boat 2 months ago and after i dumped her, she started going all out with getting back together[/spoiler]
[spoiler]currently in contact with her but i can see the same bullshit is going to happen very soon[/spoiler]