(To anyone here suffering from depression)

(To anyone here suffering from depression)

Listen, I know We don't know each other, lets put aside the edginess stuff. Please, If you are depressed and have suicide thoughts DON'T DO IT. Please get some help, you are worth a lot no matter how little you think of yourself. Your Family will miss you, your friends will miss you, your boyfriend/husband girlfriend/wife will miss you, your children will miss you. Don't feel embarrassed to ask for help. We can get through this together. The world hasn't seen your true potential yet. Hang in there! We can kick this worlds ass.

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I ate broken glass and laughed

"Hang in there" thats funny

Holy shit this just saved my life. Good thing i came across this right before pulling the trigger you made some good points.
>Sage

no friends, no relationships, no children, only a couple family member and Im pretty sure they dont give a shit.. what else is there to live for

Good. I hope they miss me and I hope they suffer if I ever kill myself. But I don't love myself enough to do it so I guess my hands are fucking tied to the there I'm currently hanging from.

I got nothing I'm hanging in out of spite.

He totally would of been a Sup Forumsro
I salute u sir..

keks

Empty positive messages trying to appear honest are the worst

Upvoted

I mean I'm probably going to. I just need to finish pushing people away well enough that I minimize the guilt of the few people that would care.

Can relate to that

Anyone know the feeling of everything being empty?

I'm not encouraging but sometimes it's the only option left.

...

Every day, user.

Thats the thing, though.

I don't WANT to die.

I WANT the numbness, worthlessness, hopelessness feelings to fucking end.

I'm going to be like this for the rest of my life. There is no cure.

And nobody wants to have a friend, or SO that is a sack of shit.

They're fine with it at first until they realize that depression isn't what you see in the fucking movies.

I'll keep fighting, but I'm so tired.

fuck you. you don't tell me what to do. anyone can kill themselves whenever they want to. people don't like it, that's their problem.

baby steps user, classify your behavior, when you do something that youve classified as depression, break away and do the oposite

Hey user, I feel like you do. I don't want to die, I just want my life to get better. It's not going to solve all your problems, but try to get a little more sun. Ever since my doctor told me to get more sun and walk 30 minutes a day, my life has been more bearable. I've been a virtual prisoner in my room for nearly a decade now so being out in the sun even for 2 minutes was hard at first. It literally stung and felt harsh on my skin. Then after a few days I could walk and stay in the sun 5 minutes and then 10 and now I can do the 30 minutes. Sounds pathetic but it's reality for me unfortunately.

Life is a little more bearable now as I said, but I've hit a wall on improving myself. I don't know how to get out and meet people or any activities to do.

That's a good idea for a lot of people. This time of year fucks with you and lack of sun is a big reason why.

Not for everyone (me) but a lot, and I mean A LOT of people benefit

Well I've had depression for over 20 years now and I can tell you I wish some doctor had just told me "Get more sun, more vitamins, exercise and drink booze or marijuana like the regular kids when life gets unbearable." Instead these doctors put me on every type of anti-depressant that ruined my brain, my sex life and started giving me involuntary twitches at one point when the dose of Lexipro was so high. Also got bouts of not being able to breath from it. Luckily those went away but I am sure it fucked me up long term. Meanwhile some booze or weed probably would have had less of a long-term effect and would have alleviated my depression more than those prescription drugs. I know this because I was very anti-alcohol and drugs till I hit my 30s and finally said "fuck it" and realized "oh, this is why all those douchebags I hated loved this stuff, I could have just gotten relief this way". Weed exacerbated my anxiety so I only did it for a few months years ago but it really did help.

See for me the best was when I was on Zoloft and alcohol makes me worse. I mean it's fun for a bit but by the end of the night I'm incredibly depressed and if I've thing good wrong I can't let it go at all.

Then again I drink alone all too often lately so there's no solid distraction. I won't go back on Zoloft though cause my doctor fucked me over and forced me into withdrawals when I was unemployed for a bit. Withdrawal plus being depressed is a really shit combination.

I dunno, I'm currently planning to push everyone away and die alone though. Either by my own hand or "naturally" so my opinion is shit

Withdrawals are the worst. Would get so angry, sensations of "electricity" flowing through my brain. First few times I didn't know wtf was going on and it was frustrating as hell.

But I hope you feel better user. If anything at least try to get treated with ketamine or magic mushrooms/lsd before offing yourself. I would do the Ketamine treatment but the only place near me does the treatments charges $750 per infusion.

my wife cucked me

Finally!
Had my pills changed a few months back coz they didn't work anymore, the 1st couple of weeks, I had the "electricity" crap going through my brain too.
Thought it was only me gettin those.
Nobody understood what I meant.

What if I'm 44 and maybe dying anyway? Can I give up now and not give a shit?

Sounds like me only I do have my parents left who give a shit but are pretty much at a loss when it comes to how I can fix my shambles of a life. Oh well I made my bed.

Do you mean she cheated or were you actually willingly cucked?

Glad I could share the withdrawal electricity experience with you to clear things up on the cause of it, haha.

But seriously user, all anti-depressants will stop working eventually and they will keep switching drugs on you and upping the dosage. These pharma companies are like sadists that are pushing drugs on you that are just as harmful as street drugs with none of the benefits (like getting high, enjoying food more, etc). Best is to try to find other ways to get relief from depression because anti-depressants are fucking up your brain/organs as much as other drugs but they're just more socially acceptable to take.

I know, but without pills 1 to 6 panick attacks/day was getting a bit too much to handle.
Did the street drugs treatment too.
The comedowns were just fucking evil.
I guess Im stuck with "their" pills for now.

I felt like this. about 7 years now.
trying to push myself into a corner I couldn't back out of, had an exit strategy (enough morphine/booze to take me out and an exit bag for good measure.
Thing aren't fun anymore, 0 enjoyment out of life, just no point to go on.
People finally noticed, got meds (they don't help, at least I think they don't), and an army of therapists and psychologists and appointments. A bit of a hassle, and I kind of hate it, but like you said, I don't really want to die either. I set myself a longterm goal I THINK might be fun, and I'm building my way to that.
Gonna buy myself a nice sailboat and sail around the world.
It's not TOO expensive. but I think it could be good. I don't know...

Reposting here from other thread since it's applicable and my og post didn't get any conversation:

Decided to give Software Engineering the finger with all of its normie mainstream bullshit.
Going for a Computer Engineering degree now so I can actually learn how computers and circuits fucking work versus how social media and proprietary software works.
Currently staying up all night working on a C++ project for a class I'm probably gonna have to retake next semester, but I'm okay with it.
Don't have weed though, my brother should be supplying me regularly since I gave him my wi-fi adapter, a monitor, a 500GB HDD, and one of the lenovo thinkcentres I stole from my old job. The adapter and HDD are the only things I actually paid for, but they cost around 100$. I set it up for him in his room so he could watch netflix and shit and even gave him my keyboard and mouse (a lot of this is so I don't play videogames during the semester on my new tower). Alas, I gotta chug down 4 monsters and munch on salty snacks while I figure out why this insertion sort is giving me an infinite loop, this merge sort is giving me a seg fault, and then where to even begin with the quick sort function.
I know all of this coupled with my pic sound non-comfy, but to me it's very comfy. Because I have a reason to be stressed out now, at least a little. All throughout school before community college and now uni, I was a SPED student with high-functioning Aspergers. The system fucked me for life cause I followed the rules and never really fooled around as a kid and had fun. But now I'm moving forward, I'm becoming self-aware. I'm starting to realize who I am and what I want from life.
Right now I'm very, very comfy, because life is making me uncomfortable and for once I welcome it.
Right now I'm not okay. I don't like myself. But someday I will be. Someday I'll like being me.

Thanks for helping me grow up, guys.

Also, listening to this: youtube.com/watch?v=qlnIkLw9es4