Guys, I have a problem. It's small right now, but I don't want to let it get bigger than it ought to

Guys, I have a problem. It's small right now, but I don't want to let it get bigger than it ought to.

So, the other day a family member asked me if I was thinking about suicide. In a serious non-joking question. Obviously I'm going to kill myself, but I have no clue if I gave her an idea somehow or something. I have hidden it for a long time. I don't think it was a random question either, she said she heard about someone that killed themselves recently and somehow the dots led to me as I show similar behaviors.

I told her no and played it off, but there's no doubt they still think I'm going to. Now when I do kill myself it would make her feel like complete shit. She'll think she knew something was up and didn't stop me.

How do I fix this? What gave her the idea?

Currently I'm altering my plans to make it look like my death was accidental, I just dissappear and they cant find my body, or at worst I was murdered.

please don't kill yourself

>attention!
>give me attention!

Why are you going to kill yourself?

kill yourself on live, pls!!! Do it! Today!

I would just wait a bit. I graduate. get a job or go to uni. when everything is going well... BAM! Off with ur head.

siberia your best choice

This. Fuck off to reddit if you want to fish for sympathy.

You can't fix it now, either you kill yourself and make her feel like shit (she would anyway if she cared about you) or you don't and you carry on with your shitty life knowing that atleast you weren't an asshole to your family members, ultimately it is your life and your choice...

FAST

I hate being alive. Not even kidding or being edgy. It hurts every day to wake up. Being alive is a chore, it's a prison.

Already have, already am, currently in the military and going to college.

I'm not looking for sympathy, I'm looking for a plan of action.

I can still dissappear in a remote country, one where they won't find my body.

Can i kill you ? Would you be open to something like that ?

Depends, for the most part I have no objections but I have some restrictions.

If i am gonna be honest, you are not a lost cause. Getting help sound mundane and boring so instead I am gonna ask you. You can become my test subject. Simply, answer my questions. I will go by A.E.
First questions, have anything bad happened in your life that you might be able to think could be the cause of your depression?

Beinf born, next question.

*being

Wew lad

Life hurts. Suck it up princess. You're not the only person in the world with issues.

Have the ones close in your life treated you nice ? Do you love then?

They have, but it's a mixed bag.

A long time ago they treated me bad, but I was a PoS little kid. I eventually got better at not being shit, but I'm still an embarrassment to them. They're nicer to me now, but I know it's an act. They probably considered I was suicidal and decided they didn't want my death on their hands.

Why the fuck do you care, you are going to be dead. Plus, unless she's a mom or sister, she's gonna forget about you for the most part. After a while you'll just be a little flicker of a memory that pops up every year or so. If you're gonna be a faggot and kys, just fucking do it
Sage

Because I'm not an edgelord. Just because I hate living doesn't mean others don't enjoy it.

Not OP but asking for that infographic on how to kill yourself with helium.

So you believe you are an embarrassment to your family? Why don't you just... talk to them about it. Start with your mother. Maybe they believe otherwise and get what you have to say out of your chest. They are not gonna pick you up. No mother would do that to her child. Maybe you regret your previous actions and feel like a victim of your past. Its not rare to see that, having regrets is a huge part of your life.

Lock you up

Anyone?I'm to pussy to go out with pain.This is my only option.

"if only we could stretch out a particular moment right before it ends in order to perpetuate our happiness, then we don't have to writhe and cry ourselves to sleep after this rave is over," the 20-year old harvard student tells himself while trying to be enthused

I've made too many mistakes in my past to not see another before it happens.

Talking to them about it would only make things worse. Possibly setting off another red flag about my suicide.

>how do i make the ones who care about me not care about me dying hur dur hurr
shut up. you don't care about anyone outside yourself, you just want attention and validation.

if you're gonna do it, just do it. if you're not going to, then don't post here. don't go around asking other people about it, because all you're doing is trying to feel noticed and acknowledged. even if this wasn't an anonymous board and i could look you face to face as you spewed this dumb shit in front of me, i'd give you a look of disgust and remove myself from the situation because you are not worth my time or anyone elses time.

you wanna be happy and content with life? make it happen. do things yourself. explore, reach for shit. nothing is gonna happen if you attentionseek on Sup Forums in your basement hoping to clutch onto the closest feeling to acknowledgement or belonging or being understood. theres millions upon millions of people just like you and even more people having issues ten times worse than you every single day, and yet the sun still rises in the morning

nobody is going to wait for you, so grow the fuck up pussy

dunno, crying on Sup Forums seems pretty teenage angsty

Tbh I am really sick of this people having suicidal thoughts. I am very socially akward person and don't have any friends to communicate with, and I have many regrets happened in my lifebut I never think about killing myself.

If you just want to waste your life because of your pathetic excuses just do it none of your internet friends will give you condolences and sympathy when you died anyways.

Cool,I'm in my 20s and serving in the military, my 'teens' are long gone.

>Implying
I can live with mistakes and a shit life. I want to die because I don't like living, it really is that simple. I don't want to be alive anymore.

If you're healthy, then why kill yourself? Are you in any kind of pain that you can't live with?
Depression can be helped, I've been there and now I truly want to live as long as I possibly can.

Then why don't you do it right now? So you'll be regret it afterwards

There's a difference between depression and the lack of desire to live. Regardless it can not be changed. Trust me I've tried for years. It doesn't go away, it never will.

Because I have things I need to set in place beforehand.

...

Don't kill yourself you stupid nigger.

Suicide will not throw off your pain, it will merely dump it onto everyone in your life.

Suicide is the most shitheaded thing you can do to your loved ones. Even if you try and make it look accidental they'll put two and two together.

Get your shit together and work to fix things. Play the long game.

When a man jumps off a bridge, he realizes one thing: he could have fixed everything save for the action of falling off.

Don't be that man.

Leave the guy alone, if he doesn't wnna leave let him kill himself jezz you guys seriouly

tell her the only way you wont is if she has sex with you
do it anyway afterwards

Take her with you, faggot. Problem solved.

Finally, thanks user.

No, she's my sis in-law and I love my brother and her too much to hurt and disrespect them.

Kek, legit laughed aloud in my office. Thanks

Rape her and no one will care if you die

>Obviously I'm going to kill myself
No you're not. Know how I know?
>I have hidden it for a long time
>long time
If you were going to kill yourself you would have done it already. You don't have the balls. You deserve no sympathy, only ridicule.

Whats wrong with wanting attention? What if he's a very lonely person?

he's not if he has a step sister that cares so much for him?

don't kys :)

Then he should find another way to get it. Manipulating people's emotions by threatening suicide is disgusting.

>implying anyone that doesn't kill themself on impulse is never going to do it

Kys

>implying
You have a disgusting tendency to put your emotions into something that never involved you in the first place. I never asked for them nor did I ask for you to care. I asked for a plan to cover up my suicide. You can take all your other emotional baggage and fuck off.

>Obviously I'm going to kill myself

I have the same mentality. It's not really an "if" for me (it was when I was younger) but rather a when. I don't actively expect to, and I'm not waiting each day with baited breath, I just know it's an inevitability with my mindset.

>Being alive is a chore, it's a prison.

I used to have that feeling more too, but it's a lot less now. I had a lot more bullshit to deal with when I was younger (taking care of family, feeling trapped in my home, watching all of my money go towards family shit, etc.) but after getting out on my own and doing little things for myself, the feelings started to lessen. When I cut off my family entirely, all of that was gone and life felt a lot easier.

>A long time ago they treated me bad, but I was a PoS little kid. I eventually got better at not being shit, but I'm still an embarrassment to them. They're nicer to me now, but I know it's an act.

I can't say I was a terrible kid, though my family tended to still treat me like I was the cause of all of their problems. I had medical issues when I was little and my family would tell me we couldn't have ___ because of me, or we were struggling over ___ because of what I was making them do. I decided when I cut my family off that I can't let other people affect how I think about myself.

>There's a difference between depression and the lack of desire to live. Regardless it can not be changed. Trust me I've tried for years. It doesn't go away, it never will.

I agree completely. I've tried to change how I feel about it for a long time. I haven't really changed at all, but I do let myself find enjoyment in some small things. I know I'm just postponing things, but I do have friends now, and laugh, and get to do things I never thought I'd do.

This isn't an appeal for you to not kill yourself. I just don't know if you've given yourself the chance to do the things you want to do yet. I recommend you do.