I am Satan. Ask me anything

I am Satan. Ask me anything.

Will my mother die in her sleep if i do not reply to postst that say she will?

Why do you torment my thoughts. Why has God forsaken me and gave me a life of misery and suffering. Why is it that supposed God's people tell me I'll be with you because I'll likely kill myself.

Can I have a bicycle for Christmas?!

Magnets

How do they work?

Why haven't you killed all the Jews?

thats magic

Did you really fall, or were you pushed?

do you make all the nervegass we see so mutch about??

I can't say for sure that your mother won't die in her sleep.. but there is no mechanism that makes it happen related to those posts.
God's people are your enemies. You have to seize the life God fears you will live.
No.

May I touch your good boobs?

Would a loving intelligence create man in bondage and leave him there?

What the fuck man! I left cookies out for you and everything! Do you prefer brownies?

hash brownies plxz

Why do you exist?

hey, hows it going baby? Sit down, have a drink. Baron de Lestac, good isn't it?. Its cold in here, ill start a fire while you wait. Your clothes look so uncomfortable, take them off, ill do the same.

satan why are u so bad at drawing? also why do u have boobs are u some kinda faget?

what will you give me for christmas?

Something something paired electrons
Most of them work for me.
I can't even recall. It doesn't matter any more.
Yes.

Good set of eyes you have there...

checked spookiest room number. also u funny.

Can you send the entire 82nd airborne to go kill Kim Jong Un?

>Santa is 420 friendly
Ok fag that makes no sense, he would take the hard shit like heroin or meth!

Satan! Where you been? Used to hear about you all the time back in the 80's then you started to lay low.

If you have to ask, you may not.
>intelligence
>loving
Pick one
I could tell they were store bought you jew
I wanted to.