Post your feels

Post your feels.

No motivation, I just feel numb. It's been years.

Your pal Matt

...

Feeling lonely. But starting to see a light (no its not death or a god).

I am here if ya need me. Kik me at sayhimatt

I get emotionally sapped by being made to feel fear shame or guilt everyday since I was a child and then after I lose all my energy they put doubts and anxieties into my head they ruined my life and I was feeling suicidal a lot but now decided to just let go and not care anymore

They make me feel powerless and worthless since I was a kid

...

They made me doubt my every breath every moment every feeling every thought

...

This kind of torture doesn't leave a mark and is hard to grasp even for me I want to cry for help but I have noone to call nowhere to go god what I wouldn't give to feel numb like you do

Learning how to control and express my emotions instead of being a logical unfeeling freak

I don't want to feel anymore user

I’m 15 years old have my whole life ahead of me. My dad’s a lawyer, my mom’s a doctor, I live in a 4,500 sq ft house and I’m dating the girl of my dreams. Life’s good overall, but I feel kind of directionless. I get good grades but I don’t know where I want to go in life. I want to go to college and get a good job but I’m unsure as to what field I want to end up in. I just feel generally anxious about the future I guess, that’s all.

...

15 years old, you say?

Yes, sir.

Feeling is something that reminds you that you're alive user.

Can't get hired at a good job/career, even though I have three degrees. Depressed. Drink every night. Probably ending it soon.

Yeah... ow.

Jackie Sup Forums fix the fucking captcha.

You're only 15 user. Enjoy high school as much as you can, because nothing really matters then. Just have fun and enjoy your childhood while you still can

I don't care about that anymore all I want is to escape the pain but I can't kill myself because then they will win

Thanks for the advice, user

Got a girlfriend getting myself a good degree. Should be fucking happy. Everything is going well. I'm in a band. We're doing alright. I'm the most miserable I've ever been.

That's what high school is for, man. You've got 3 more years to figure it out, and I'm sure you will. In the mean time, just keep on walking the line and know that you're doing all you can at this point.

Go out, take risks, try to make friends. Nothing at your age matters. Seriously, you may think it does(I did), but the truth is that wasting your youth will only lead to a pile of regrets.

Most importantly, get away from this shithole.
I hope the mods ban you, it'd be for your own good.

Where's your spirt user?! Stop being a bitch and buckle down. If you'd stop drinking, you'd probably save a lot more money. Get a hobby, read a book, stop wasting your time. Do something instead of wasting away

I want to die but I can bare to leave people behind, girlfriend. Parents. Siblings. Band members. Friends. I couldn't do that to them

I have a handful of close friends and I feel some semblance of social belonging.
>I’ve been b& before

deth ccount rose to 4 ha ha
he put up a lot of struggllle
dd not go out like the mouse like as others
will be near soon
seee you

When the pain is enough, you will die inside

Don't do drugs. Worst mistake of my life. Hardcore drugs at least.

try opiates.

thank me later.

Got the t-shirt and threw up all over it man

I’m a pretty straight-laced kid, haven’t even smoked weed once in my life.
>some Sup Forumstards may call me a bitch but I’m too afraid of disappointing my parents and Texas is a prohibition state, I’d risk get fucked legally
>I also spend too much money on CS:GO gambling to buy drugs

I finally had my moment with the girl I had awkward sexual tension with since I was 14, shes white as the snow, but dirt poor, her family came from the Balklands, she was a very sexy slav I must say, I felt so lucky to meet her through mutual friends back in early freshman year, we got really close, but we didnt try anything, she had soy boys and betas on her, some my friends, and I didnt wanna risk starting drama, only reason she got those guys was because of how shy she is, dosent speak much, dosent do anything for attention, just really pretty and there
Fast forward to last week
I was basically a god to her when I picked her up in a Mercedes, we were supposed to go swimming but we said fuck it and chilled at my place, we ended up making out, hardcore, every press felt like it should've happened much sooner, we start to get more intimate, I start sucking on her breasts, even I was surprised to get that far my first time doing shit like this with her
As things were about to turn in to sex, her parents called, telling her to come home, they dont know where she is, and she responds saying she wants to say
Dammit, cockblocked by the parents, of course.
She sends them my address through the iMessage feature, little did I know I in for it
Her dad came to my door, speaking little English, visibly upset thinking I fucked his daughter, I told him we drove the car, and he left saying "I sorry, I submit police report"
Normally this wouldn't bother me, but I was freaking out because of how I just got off probation, 11 pm that night I got a police call about how "she cant come over anymore"
I didnt care much, not like my place is the only place to chill, just oh shit, no more cops.
eventually word got out that I sucked he tits because of a tard kid that overheard me, she was so upset, I blew my chance with her, in all ways, and I failed pre calc

try opiates

thank me later

Eh, ex-friend flaunted the fact he was fucking my ex, someone I was obsessed with.
Probably gonna toss him off a bridge if things continue going the way they are.

I don’t think I’d enjoy the come-down. I also don’t want to get addicted to anything/ruin my life

I just want to let go, to die inside, how do I do that?

Letting it go, and so should you.

lol

I’m a sophmore taking PreCalc and it’s fucking gay. I haven’t had much trouble with it but the navigation problems are tedious and annoying.

im sorry

Fixing immature reactions, or just dressing them up in a mature demeanor. Outcome's still the same, transition's different.

I can't don't you understand as long as I have emotions they will be used against me I need to get rid of them so I will be tortured no more just tell me how someone please

Kidnapped someone close to another, sent them a picture stating if I see police I'll slice their face off. Told them they had 24 hours to appear in the obituary or else it'd be them.
Good plan. Much satisfaction. Wow.

I ate two 8 milligram of diludid earlier and now my breathing is labored hope I don't die

I’m 15 so you can take this with a grain of salt but I think I see what you’re getting at.
>If you just try to put shit out of your head, go outside, meditate all that cliché bullshit it will give you some perspective and maybe make you feel better for the time being.
>One can gain greater control of their emotions but nobody can turn them off; emotion is part of the human condition.

If you crushed it up or drank alcohol you might be fucked

That image.. is happening to me right at this moment. Thanks Matt. I'm crying.

Reccomended dosage is 2.5mg-10mg once every 3-6 hours, good luck user

Being a logical unfeeling robot wbo doesn't know what emotions are doea have it's perks. When faced with any problem you usually can solve it. Dealing with people on the other hand is where emotion comes into play. Learn to balance the two and you'll be able to tackle any problem. Emotions are what makes us who we are. Don't try to become nothing but a logical being. Trust me it's not fun

My feels are discontent and frustration. Life is not going anywhere, and I don't know how to make it go anywhere anymore. Maybe I never did. Is there going to be a war soon or something? I'm really tired of this monotony.

Wondering why cinema villains succumb to being bit on the hand, especially if they have a blunt instrument, or a knife at best.
Like puncture their cheek and pry their mouth open, douchebag.
This isn't difficult shit.

Let me clarify, I need to learn emotional detachment, otherwise they will surely kill me

Cite a specific example to give us a better idea of what you're talking about, user

Try meditation, or pick up a hobby that you enjoy doing. Find a purpose and it will allow you to forget about whatever's going on in your life.

I'm having trouble honestly, but it's a common trope, and Kung-Foogle isn't turning up anything.
Surely you've seen it though, some wily heroin is in the clutches of your typical baddie, possibly tied or something, then using the best of her wits, bites her captors hand until he lets out a bloodcurdling screech then tends to it while she makes her cunning escape.

...

I have a basic idea of what you're talking about
>Another trope that's always confused me is villains explaining their whole "evil plot" at the climax of the film. I understand that it gives the audience closure and keeps the third act moving but it just feels silly because it makes no logical sense, especially given that the hero often uses this window of time to foil the aforementioned plot/save the day.

Dumped 3 weeks ago, father died 5 days ago. It ain't goin well

So I’ve never really been happy in life grew up in a broken home so I’ve had lots of bad shit happen to me and I’ve finally tried dating. I dated when I was 15 but it didn’t work out so now 8 years later I find this wonderful 10/10 and me being the beta I am I’ve never fucked so she’s really sex hungry and I’m a faggot so I’ve just tried to take things slow and she cheated on me with my best friends
>feelsbadman

Yeah, that shit always irked me as well.

I heard from a 62-year-old Sup Forumsro last night that neither the good times nor the bad times last forever. Things will get better user, just give it time.

>gf just broke up with me two days ago
>came to the realization what has actually happened and now reality is setting in
>literally feel like i lost a part of myself
>mfw she texts me last night and says she hopes we cross paths again and can try dating again
>now i have some sort of false hope that we will get back together even though it will never happen

How long were you two together for?

a little over a year

Damn. What caused the breakup?
>If you address the root cause of the issues between you guys, getting back together and having a healthy relationship again may be possible

told me that it she had been working hard to stay happy and felt like she wasnt making me happy (I have always been happy with her so idk how she felt like i wasnt) and she wasnt having fun anymore

She might be going through some emotional issues that are completely unrelated to you. Hopefully she can resolve them, I know this whole ordeal is causing you a lot of pain.

>I've been with my girlfriend for almost 4 years
>2 months ago we began having some problems
>She was cold and distant, nothing was fun anymore, etc.
>We traveled together, and thinigs got better
>3 days ago we were having a conversation, and I was telling her how an ex girlfriend from a friend of mine cotacted him
>She inmediatly began feeling uncomfortable and started acting weird
>When I asked what was wrong she told me that an ex writed her
>I got jelous and we argued
>Today I saw her again and we talked
>She told me he was just a friend of her and that the conversation was friendly
>I asked her to show me the conversation and she did
>Even though she asked him directly if they were friends and he replied that he was there were something weird about it
>He told him that she meant a lot form him, more than he meant for her
>She told her that she tought otherwise
>Then he told her she was the only person that really knew him and she told her that he let her 'Speechless'
>I didn't believe her, and now we're about to break up

Am I overreacting? I can't help to feel betrayed

It sounds like she didn't fully get over him before she entered into a relationship with you, which was pretty shitty of her. Give her some time to emotionally move past him. You have a right to be upset, it seems to me like this whole thing was kind of out of your control.

I miss her but I'm sick of her stupid games. We both know this isn't going anywhere and if it does it'll just end badly again.

Starting to think it isn't worth it

Do you really miss her or do you just miss the times you had with her? If she seems genuinely emotionally manipulative I'd let her leave your life. But If you really love her, just give her some space then try to reconnect.

Should I break up with her? They've been chatting from time to time for 4 years and we already had strong discussions because of this

I miss her more than the times we had, but the best thing is probably to move on.

Wrapped up in some pretty foul shit.
Can't really get out of it in any conventional way.
Talking about what goes on in my head less and less.
Little point in doing so.
Some days nice shit runs through it, usually can't explain it.
Try to force it, doesn't usually work, even though I can force myself to behave differently, so I don't understand why that is.
This will either work out very well or horribly in the end either way.

It's up to you.
>Breaking up with her will ultimately make all this a distant memory and let you move past it, but you'll always wonder what could have been.
>I'd give her a few days to think about it, then try to talk it over with her. If she still seems attached to this guy after she realizes she may have to lose you to stay attached to him, I'd at least take a break if not break up. If it's savable I'd give it a shot but ending the relationship won't mean the end of the world.

It's ultimately your choice. If you really love her, you'll regret not trying to save your relationship with her. Give it a shot just so you know you tried. Tell her how much she means to you.

I'm just going to have to let it go...I'll never have that life again, and I'll likely never live the life I've been dreaming of for so long, keeping me up at night ever since I left her.

I'm...going to die here. Or, I'll live to see my home destroyed, and all those shining faces turned to ash.

Thanks, i needed to read that

No problem, user. Invite me to a Discord if you want, I can add you in case you want to talk about anything in the future. I'll screenshot the (You) so you know it's me. It's ok if you don't want to, though.

It's more complicated than that

Elaborate. What do you mean by that, exactly?

>Be me
>High school Jr.
>Hardly see my dad because of divorced parents
>Dad got completely screwed in the settlement
>No lawyer
>Surprise divorce from mom
>Lost the house
>Car was totaled a month after divorce
>Forced to become a commercial truck driver
>Broke
>5 years later
>Still driving truck
>I am usually a generally happy person
>Have to hide fact that I cry myself to sleep
>I don't want people to pity me
>Grades are slipping
>I am okay during the day but the night kills me
>Friends start to see something is up
>They help me through the night
>Insomniac bro keeps me company on phone
>Few months later
>Grades are back on track
>Better sleep
>Dad is getting out of the hole

If the feels are killing you, get help. I wish I did sooner and didn't suffer for years.

I think she's just stringing me along now

Star-crossed. Funny now, guess it has to be.
Gut-wrenching whenever I first found out.
Can you really blame me for going a little crazy?
Some girl, lol.
Not by a long shot.
No matter what everyone else tells me.

...

>feel lonely
>get with girl
>feel unalone
>get married
>feel happy for once... for a while
>fights start to happen
>get depressed and irritable
>tell her I miss how we used to be
>she tells me she's not responsible for how I feel

It gets worse

>have a step daughter
>at this point I keep emotional distance
>she adores me
>all she wants to do is spend time with me
>that old familiar feeling comes back
>be the dad she always wanted
>enjoy life... for a while
>gets interested in boys
>I become old news
>go from spending time everyday to talking once a month if that
>reached out to her on a regular basis and got the impression I annoy her by spending so much time with her
>depression and irritability gets worse
>wife and kid treat me like an afterthought
>wife asks why I can't go back to how we were before
>I said she's changed, that we both have
>Somehow it's still my problem and my fault
>...fuck her. fuck my daughter. fuck everyone I remotely care about.

That's my story.

user you just opened my eyes. Thank you

If you're seriously considering breaking up with her you don't have much to lose. If you really think this is the case, tell her this isn't a game to you and you're tired of it. Face the shit head-on.
>I can tell you about something that happened in my life if you want to get a better understanding of my perspective:
>I had a similar experience a few months ago. It was with a girl a bit younger than me. Although we weren't officially together, there was something between us. She told me she didn't want to talk anymore because she was afraid I'd lose interest in her, which made me pretty upset. I tried talking it out with her, but she just pushed me away. I moved on, now she's trying to reconnect with me and acts like nothing ever happened. But I feel no affection toward her anymore.

I know that feel. Like you were climbing your whole life, and then you see the top of what you can do. Where from there?

Sure, you have a great job, benefits, and friends. But you get a realization that this is it now. Every day for the rest of your life will just be waking up, going to the same place every day, going home exhausted, only to start the process again. And for what? Just to save enough cash to coast off until you die 20 ish years after retirement? There no more purpose, or goal you want to achieve. You're just going through the motions...

...I'm hoping I didn't just inspire a murder suicide just now.

You stand back and watch people drift away from you as time goes on. But you just start to care less and less. They didn't know you to start with. They knew the happy mask you put on in public, but they never knew or understood the hollow shell underneath. None of it matters, nothing matters.

The only thing keeping you from offing yourself is just treating life like a game. When nothing matters, you may as well see what happens. Just observing the world.

I know that feel.
Ever since my junior year of highschool it's been getting progressively more difficult to even get out of bed, let alone actually do anything worthwhile.
I used to feel alive, like I could run a 100 miles and feel nothing but joy at the end, now I'll be lucky if I get my degree, not to mention a decent job.

I might have an actual mental disorder.
Not sure how I'm going to handle that. I look at people with depression or anything like that and they rarely get better, they either kill themselves or live strung out lives of pain so that others don't need to feel it. I don't know how to tell my family. They'll be sick with worry thinking I might kill myself or try and have me committed, and I don't want to be at the mercy of cruel, bored men in white coats.

Is there any way I can get help secretly?

I feel like I'm at a crossroads. Do I keep living the life I've built an identity around (even though it's all completely worthless at this point), or do I move on to try something new that may not even have any returns?

You can seek help, but I wouldn't recommend it. They'll just get you drugged up and suffer adverse side effects in time.

You just grow to accept that life is pretty bland and move on. Accept that nothing has purpose, and everything you'll ever do is ultimately futile. Then just go do shit for the hell if it.

the question is,does it really matter which one i choose user?
because i feel like no matter what i do i will still fail

So lonely. Havent felt the touch of a man for too long and im going fuckin crazy. someone just hold me goddamnit.