Help me plan a murder, Sup Forums

help me plan a murder, Sup Forums.

The company I work for is currently getting sued by some old hag.
An intern gave out information to someone that he shouldn't have, we'll likely lose and that means the company will close and I will lose my job.

The chances of me getting rehired are zero to none. If she wins, she will also destroy my existence. If that happens I will kill her, at that point I have nothing to lose.

The probblem is that she has a german shepherd with her 24/7. How do I get past him? She lives alone in the countryside, so if the dog is out I can do whatever i want.

poison the dog, come back later to bring the girl and pay the debt.

make friends with the dog and get it to brutally rip her apart

is there anything fast acting available? I thought about antifreeze but that shit takes like an entire day to kill a dog.

Light the whole house on fire...

the dog is no problem just know the route she walks it and put poison in something tasty that he will eat

the real problem is since you got a strong motive its very likely you wont get away with it

I need to take out the dog somehow, after that, she's free game.

I'm from a country where its impossible to get guns btw.

Pls no hurt doggie, he did nuffin wrong.

good advice would be to drug the dog maybe he can kill her

and you're in a country where murder is legal ?

I was thinking about that as well. It's gonna be very clear that I was the one, she doesn't have any family whatsoever though so I will only have to deal with the feds.

But if I don't leave any evidence behind (DNA etc.) and have an alibi I should be good right?

>poisoned meatball
it's pretty obvious isn't it?
but if it's possible please don't kill the doggo... just put some sleeping pills in it (ground up ofc) and send him to sleep while you murder the granny
also don't forget to post pics you might be a legend after that

Yeah I think sleeping pills are a good option, I don't want the dog to throw up all over the place and she panics takes him to the vet or some shit and i can't go for the kill in peace. if I attack her on her way to the car the dog might still function enough to bite me.

with sleeping pills he'd just fall asleep normally, but I'm want to make sure he doesn't magically wake up while i slice her up

lace some meat with sleeping pills or posion and throw it to the dog

Poison the dog
Cut car brakes
She'll go to vet because of her dog
Profit

Hmm, Maybe create a Free Sample of Dog Biscuit flyer and attach a small amount of "roofied" dog biscuits which would not harm the dog but only to sleep. I don't think anyone here would like the dog getting hurt... Place that In the mailbox and just wait...

tbh I don't give a flying fuck about the dog.

make the doggo fall asleep and put her outside while you're inside with the granny or the other way around

I would give the dog sleeping pills bc that way it'll look less of a murder, then kill the lady injecting potassium into her veins. Btw if you inject a large amount of potassium in a human body the heart will stop but the sun¡bstance will get absorbed so no evidence is left except but the point where you injected it. My whole plan would be sleeping dog, nock out lady, potassium in crotch where people might not look and the femoral artery is placed, then leave and have high possibilities of getting away with it

Then simple, Walk In to the property shoot the dog kick the door open and find the bitch... Light the whole house on fire and walk out like a boss...

Even better, put the lady in bed or if the nocking attack leaves marks, hit her body against a worktop in the places you knocked her out so it looks natural. That's how I would do it anons. Sorry about grammar errors

implaying knocking out an OLD LADY wouldn't leave obvious marks on her body.
well unless someone perform actual magic the dog will stay asleep. That's what sleeping pills are for although you'll have to calculate the right amount based on it's bodyweight

I answered about the marks already

Here it is

I'm sure they'll do blood tests though and obviously find the high concentration.
Right now it's going to be very clear that it was me anyways, the good thing is that I know she has no relatives, so i don't have to worry about revenge.

i'm still elaborating on what I might do to her. Shooting or knocking out is not an option, i want her to suffer. it can't be too quick

Maybe you shouldn't have gotten yourself into the situation where you have to murder out of fear cause of your lack of actions or maybe if you could apply that motivation and dedication to something else in life you wouldnt have this problem

Nah we aren’t pussies, the dog probably persuaded her to file the lawsuit

asshole, dont kill the dog, 2 sleeping pills in a stake.

99% of murders in which the way the act is done are influenced by passion you get caught. The murder must be done with the same emotional cool as would be the case for murdering someone unknown. Otherwise it will definitely fail.

If you want her to suffer just rape her, that's the good old physical+psycological torture

Shut the fuck up, you clearly didn't read the OP. If you're going to act like you know so much, why don't you stop talking out of your ass first?

How would you put sleeping pills in this and wouldn't this kill the dog anyway?

Cook some meatballs with trazodone pills sprinkled into them. The dog will follow sleep. I would strongly recommend getting somebody who is completely uninvolved and has no motive.

You seem to know an awful lot about this chick. I'm thinking you're the one that fucked up and this chick is the one that you wronged.

How about you man the fuck up and take responsibility for your actions you pathetic excuse for a human being?

Raw hamburger meat with broken glass in it.

How did you even reach this conclusion you autistic fuck

It all depends, they would only need to start investigating before they will figure it all out.

You could try to use toxins common in a house to kill her, Talc, Ricin, bleach or lye

Underrated

Use insulin. Fatal as fuck if you use a high enough dose, and basically untraceable.

you must be a pathetic human being to plan a murder just because you are a loser in real life.

I hope you get caught or killed, you useless piece of shit

just by posting on here you've already left too much evidence.

Your ip has been recorded please wait for police

...

Make anonymous call to police, tell them your victim is armed and dangerous. Make popcorn, watch the news.

Leave doggo out of it. Learn German and gain his trust. Also, start looking for a job now you worthless fat fuck. Or befriend the old lady and steal her money.

Dont forget, chocolate is actually pretty toxic to dogs. They cant metabolise theobromine. I suggest checking toxicity data for an idea as to how much chocolate it would take to kill one.

top kek

Kill some niggers first

It won't kill him. Onions on the other hand, will.

Why don't you try getting a job?

Big dogs like german shepards arent going to volutarily eat poison even if its wrapped in meat or cheese, that only works in movies. Cringey fucking thread, how does murdering her fix anything?

Theobromine will kill it, it will kill all dogs. Please explain the toxic component of onions

dogs have to eat a huge amount of chocolate to die, and even then it depends on the breed and their genetic sensitivity,.

Or just Google it you stupid faggot. Chocolate will give the dog diarrhea. They can process theobromine, just not at the same rate as humans. Onions will cause their red blood cells to burst, you're an idiot and I shouldn't even have explained it.

>guy wants to get away with murder
>can’t even outsmart a dog
>this plan is doomed

My dog ate curries filled with onions, he also munched a twix bar eveyday. He lasted about 12 year.

Yes in small doses it's fine. You weren't feeding him whole onions a dozen at a time.

Who ate the other twix?

Cyanide laced jello pudding that hoe.

>12 year

What breed? If hes a small dog then you just shortened his life horribly.

And why would you go down with the company? Why would it 3nd you and render you unhirable? Explain yourself user i dont want to be helping a regular bad guy with my awesome assassin skills

>mobile
Congrats, you somehow managed to be the biggest faggot in a thread which features an edgelord OP acting like he's going to kill someone and a whole group of teens pretending they have the knowledge to help.

By the way, kids, most of the stuff being recommended only works in movies. Even the whole sleeping pills for a dog thing is retarded.

Mods plz

What did you and your company do that is causing you to get sued?

>t. 23 yo edgelord

you'd might as well just kill yourself, you soon-to-be jobless fat fuck, or face a lifetime in a jail cell with bubba.
>I guess you enjoy bbc

Buy a gun, buy a silencer, creep up shoot the bitch in the teeth, abuse the dog

Get good at shooting a rifle.
Be 200 yards or so away
Shoot as she walks outside
???
Profit

>wants to pop one in a mothafucka
>seeks advice on mongol embroidery planks
pop the granny then do yourself faggot!

Not sure but swat her once and the doggo is gone. Rest is up to you

why don't you talk to your mom and tell her why your balls aren't as good as they were 4 years ago when obama was stroking your ego you little bitch.

Kek

don't drop the soap

HE DINDU NUFFIN ROWNG

After you find a solution for the dog it just a matter of getting to her without being seen then leaving. A small country town might mean you're spotted unless no one discovers the body for a while.
Depending on how many people she is fucking over means motive could fall on a lot of people but would be focused on the work place for sure. Prepair alibi when you make a move. Also why focus on the house? If she has other movments and routines you can find, it could be a matter of just walking up to her, killing and walk away.
If she has many enemy's this is preferable as the list of people will be long and even if people had a clue they dont care enough to do anything. Any sort of passage she takes for whatever reason like a stairwell, ally etc is a good start

work of fiction

>I want her to suffer
How did you justify this in your head by the way?
An old woman sues a companmy for something that they obviously did wrong and this means you get to kill her? I fail to see the connection. I'd understand if you would do it BEFORE the trial to save the company and your job but you wanna do it after... for revenge? you're taking revenge for something that was 100% the right thing to do and wasn't aimed at you at all.

Call me a moralfag but your logic seems retarded. No wonder you're unemployable.