What the fuck was his problem? Why was he just a walking bunch of memes and one liners?

What the fuck was his problem? Why was he just a walking bunch of memes and one liners?

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His real name was Jacob Cohen.

>Why did this stand up comedian tell jokes

No fucking respect.

NO RESPECT

HE NEEDED THE MONEY

The Jewish people are natural entertainers. The reason for this is they have evolved to be loveable so that no one kills them, although it hasnt worked since the holocaust was only like four decades ago.

hey! did somebody step on a duck?

wanna make 17 dollars the hard way?

when you but that hat, does it come with a free bowl of soup?

lol. I can pretty much recite all of cadyshack and he has some of the best lines.

OH!

I never thought I'd live in a world where the Diceman has a career resurgence.

OP called me a baboon, he thinks I'm his wife.

No respect I tell ya.

>op shits himself

Did somebody step on a duck?

>NO RESPECT

they weren't jokes they were pleas of desperation and when people laughed it made it even worse

Yeah that's what I said...

Are you fucking retarded?

Hey everyone, we're all gonna get laid!

We need to go bigger!

>one liners are bad
Succ me BOI

Fuck you you fucking piece of shit. I'm tired of this kind of shit.

I remember hearing one of his standup jokes on tv when I was kid, the one where he's like 'I just flew in from Chicago and boy are my arms tired!'

I don't know why but I thought it was the funniest joke I ever heard, I was chocking myself laughing

lol thats not a bad one

Is that a Dangerfield joke? That's such a popular joke, I've heard it a million times from a million people.

He was a comedian of the old school.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAHH OOOOAAAHH OH-OOOOOOOAAHHH

WE'RE ALL GETTING LAID!

> You win +5 internets

I dunno, I grew up thinking it was, it's definitely his humour.

He was a fucking genius.

Kinison was so based.

I really love Kinison.

youtube.com/watch?v=EclQVQGqnZ0

Pro to the end.
He had a heart attack during a Leno interview and had enough showmanship to see himself off the stage before collapsing.

funny, last night I was listening to Based on a True Story and norm mentions Kinison so i spent the next 2 hours watching old stand up bits from Kinison, Dangerfield and Dice

>i spent the next 2 hours watching old stand up bits from Kinison, Dangerfield and Dice
One of those things is not like the other.

you're right, only one of them sold out MSG 2 nights in a row, the first comedian to ever accomplish that.

>Everything that he says about women is based on the kind of ignorant dirty jokes told by insecure teenage boys among themselves, as they try to conceal their misinformation and bolster their courage by objectifying women into creatures who can be dismissed with the usual crude obscenities. Even then, if he were mocking or kidding this attitude, it could perhaps be funny. But not a single word in Clay's film indicates that he has been able to deal with the fact that women are living, thinking beings. He sees only their sexual organs, fears them, and must punish or conquer them to reassure himself.

>"Dice Rules" was filmed in concert (what a word) at Madison Square Garden, which the comedian was able to fill two nights in a row. It is eerie, watching the shots of the audience. You never see anyone just plain laughing, as if they'd heard something that was funny. You see, instead, behavior more appropriate at a fascist rally, as his fans stick their fists in the air and chant his name as if he were making some kind of statement for them. Perhaps he is. Perhaps he is giving voice to their rage, fear, prejudice and hatred. They seem to cheer him because he is getting away with expressing the sick thoughts they don't dare to say.

>Crowds can be frightening. They have a way of impressing the low, base taste upon their members. Watching the way thousands of people in his audience could not think for themselves, could not find the courage to allow their ordinary feelings of decency and taste to prevail, I understood better how demagogues are possible.

> stop liking things i don't like

>roger ebert

Hmm never heard of his standup, got a set?

Ya know the problem with Dangerfield is that he took too many liberties.

>dead guy who didn't get it

His role as the abusive dad in natural born killers always cracked me up

Ebert getting worked by the Dice character.

I was 11 years old and even I knew that his "Dice" persona was just an embellished "macho" guy character. That's the irony of Dice, he wasn't really the man you saw on stage, that was just a character he was playing.

What was it again.. oh yeah, so I had a craving for nuts.
So I went out,
and spent the whole afternoon with my wife and mother-in-law.

I tell ya, my kids a real smart ass.
I said to him one day you'll have kids of you're own.
You know what he said.
Someday, so will you.

I come home from work,
my parrot says: QUICK, OUT THE WINDOW

I tell ya, I don't get no respect at all.

Oof, I haven't been feeling so good lately, I could see myself getting worse.
So I went to my doctor, you know my doctor, doctor Vinnie Boombazi.
I tell 'm, doc I've been looking in the mirror and I look horrible, what's wrong with me?
I don't know, but I can tell you you're eyesight is perfect.

that was a masterstroke, the laugh track was great as well

>the holocaust was only like four decades ago
>1976

yep. American here, and the math checks out.

All he wanted to do was take teen boys, and dress them up as teen girls, and people gave him shit for it.

I went to a hotel and told the bell boy to handle my bag, he started feeling up my wife.
I said to him: "Who told you you could get frisky with my wife?", he said: "Everybody"!

My daughter's no bargain either. In public school she was voted most likely to conceive.

He's a legend.

he's talks a lot of shit for a nigga without a mouth

This movie confused my childhood

Just imagine, if this man wasn't a self-deprecating comedian, he'd be terrifying as fuck

because he was fucking good at it.

youtube.com/watch?v=XXq2rsaOxWQ

wtf is your problem m8?
prbly not enough respect

Seriously though this man is a top notch entertainer. Writing a joke is difficult enough but this man could have you laughing in 45 words. Became a comedian after a unfulfilling career in sales and learned to give 0 fucks. He wrote my favorite joke. He's my guy. He should be our guy

pfft

doubt that

>tfw you will never be on the set of caddyshack chilling with Bill Murray, Chevy chase, and Rodney danger field all on their prime.
Can you imagine? You would die of laughter

rodney = god

this century sucks

Not sure who said that. The man was funny he made people laugh why is this such a hard concept to grasp

i'm saying that

Oh. Godspeed

Fuck all three of them.
They're funny but the real them are all pieces of shit.

YOU SCRATCHED MY ANCHOR

Ebert is such a fedora tipping, pretentious fedoralord I can never take him serious.

He was the fedora before it became a cringe symbol.

>PUSSY ASS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
literally no different from amy schumer

Apparently he had something some people had before the internet called "charisma". Sounds kind of tryhard to me though desu senpai.

SO I HAD MY TONGUE IN SOME GIRLS ASSHOLE

A GUUUUUUUSHHHHHHHHHHH

What's up with this crap? Eh? No respect. No respect I tell ya!

It's the delivery it really is.

For a guy who has a billion bags under and covering his eyes, how did he manage to make them protrude so much?

Yeah and after five minutes Bill and Chevy get into a fight

Is that the guy who played Baron Harkonnen?

>I tell ya Paul, no respect!

HICKORY DICKORY DOCK

THE BITCH WAS SUCKIN' MY COCK

OH!

Press F to pay no respect.

Dangerfieldburg wants to sexually confuse white boys
hmm...

N O R E S P E C T
O

R
E
S
P
E
C
T

>THIS AINT YOUR GRANDMA'S MONOLOGUE

look at little nero ovah here

YFW
Rodney may have worked on a series of "gay" records with a guy named Byrd E. Bath.
(They're actually pretty funny)
queermusicheritage.com/camp.html

>I can pretty much recite all of cadyshack
And yet you fucked up every quote in your post.
Dipshit.

holy fuck lol.

Sam was the greatest.
He was also a Pentecostal preacher!

youtube.com/watch?v=Kyagrj-OHAM

>One of those things is not like the other.
Considering Sam Kinison and Diceman both got their start at Dangerfield's then yeah that is very apropos.

I read about after his fatal car crash,

>At first it looked like Kinison had suffered no serious injuries, but within minutes he suddenly said to no one in particular, "I don’t want to die. I don’t want to die." LaBove later said, "it was as if he was having a conversation, talking to someone else, some unseen person." Then there was a pause as if Kinison was listening to the other person speak. Then he asked "But why?" and after another pause LaBove heard him clearly say: "Okay, okay, okay.’ LaBove said, "The last ‘okay’ was so soft and at peace.... Whatever voice was talking to him gave him the right answer and he just relaxed with it. He said it so sweet, like he was talking to someone he loved."
I hope Sam's in heaven.

>Dice made it big, but Bob Nelson didn't.

There's no justice.

youtube.com/watch?v=I_7tIBk_DfQ

while trying to bang cindy morgan

That sucks. He was hilarious.
He's a Christian now, but he still does comedy.

Something else, Bob Saget got his start at Dangerfield's as well.

HICKORY DICKORY DOCK....

He had a residency in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee, a family tourist area where Dollywood is. I didn't know who he was when I was there, but I saw his brochure with quotes from Dangerfield and Johnny Carson talking about how funny he was. I wish I had seen his show.

This song goes out to all the homies in the hood.
Peace out!

youtube.com/watch?v=W-NK0r0fc-k