Antonio Valencia

>Antonio Valencia
>never ever played for Valencia

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>de Gay
>Is straight

>Danny Shittu
>never played for manure united

>Kevin Trapp
>not actually a trapp

>Curtis Good
>Actually not that good

>Petr Cech
>Isn't a professional penis inspector

>Petr Cech
>He's actually czech

>throwing z's into your country name like an edgy teenager

>Rob Holding
>plays in a holding role

>Antonio Valencia
>isn't a delicious orange

>Toni Kroos
>passes more than crossing

>Messi
>actually seems pretty tidy

>Lionel Missi
>missed crucial free kick in WC final
>missed penalty in Copa America final
>missed penalty vs Chelsea before >Torres
>missed chance to score before Buyern 7-0
>

>Wayne Rooney
>Is not actually a Kangaroos Knee

kek

>Poo
>In the loo

>literal joke of a country trying to chat shit about the world's next superpower

Fuck off designated, I don't need your shit stained laughs.

>Jonny Evans
>actually dating some slut called Helen

>the worlds next super nuclear crater after a trigger happy Pakistani gets excited by all the N Korea chaos and just says fuck it nuke the cunts

Fixed it for you

brilliant

>implying any mudslime in the world has the balls to fuck with us

we cook slimes for breakfast lunch and dinner here, unlike you

Eating slime might explain why you're always shitting in the streets.

>we cook slime for breakfast lunch and dinner here, unlike you

Thats because you're poor

HEY LADS

WHICH KEEPER CAN KICK THE BALL THE FURTHEST!?!

DE GEA

BECAUSE HE CAN KICK IT TO VALENCIA
LMAO

>Daley Blind
>isn't blind every day

>Villa
>Never played for Villa

neither did he play for Sevilla

what a fraud

Designated

>Dirk Kuyt
>isn't a tethered heavier-than-air craft with wing surfaces that react against the air to create lift and drag

>Jason Scotland
>isn't Scottish

>Florian Lejeune
>isn't actually young anymore

>George Best
>Actually was the best

>Paulo Wanchope
>Usually took two chops to bring him down

>Christian Eriksen
>isnt a mobile phone

Turns out his middle name is "Dannemann"

>is actually a Dane man

>Marco Reus
>doesn't drive a Royce, doesn't even have a driver's license

>Andrew Cole
>Black as coal

>New York city
>400 years old

>Dick Advocaat
> Not a homosexual lawyer

That's VERY young for a city.

only one good

>Andre Villas-Boas
>Still yet to manage Villa alongside David Villa as assistant manager

Why does America keep embarrassing itself?

>Daley Blind
>Has job that requires good vision

And how old's your constitution?

>Rodney Whitehead
>has a black head

>David Seaman
>Wasn't in the Navy or a fisherman

>English Gardner
>actually an American sprinter

>Kike
>Is a gentile

>Salva Sevilla
>never saved Sevilla A team

Germany is a really new country

>no rich heritage of oppression

>Can
>actually can't

>Adam Johnson
>Gets his Johnson out to kids

>Ruben Rochina
>plays for Rubin

>Leeds
>never actually lead

>wasn't a fisherman

Yes he was/is, he loves fishing. Shit joke/10

>Isaac Success
>Only one goal in 17 apps and Watford is 10th

...

...

...

>Dick Butkus
>never kissed a butt dick

...

>the fucking state of you

>danny woodhead
>head is not actually made of wood

>Cuahtemoc Blanco
>is brown

CHI

Underrated

>ryan fredericks
>is only one person
>and not called frederick

...

>the brown
>is a ginger albino

>nani
>not shocked that onii-chan cums on your panties again

>DJ Campbell
>Is a footballer, not a DJ

>Sokratis
>Actually not Sokratis

>OP
>has never made an original post in his life

>Claudio Bravo
>Plays like shit.

>Jesus Corona
>not Jesus
>not a beer

>is not jesus's crown

>doesn't even have a driver's license
I thought he did now. Or did he get it, then have it taken away?

>Mario Basler
>never played for Basel

>Thomas Müller
>Never milled a day in his life

I never understood the hard on they have in England for this guy. He wasn't that good.

>Antonio Valencia
>never ever played for San Antonio Spurs

youtube.com/watch?v=LVdaDkiIOfM

>that commentary

he fishes for a hobby, being a fisherman is a job for smelly french fucker

Not even my post either

His name literally makes me laugh every time. Ever since I first heard it as a kid.

Neuer has a hell of a kick on him

Check out his assist against England in the 2010 World Cup for instance, ball must have gone 70 yards at least

CA

NO

>Ashley Young
>is old

>Flavio Roma
>came from Lazio's academy

Underrated

underraged

>Chris Smalling
>is actually 6'3

>That flag
>Talking about football
Fuck off street shitter.

>Thomas muller
>Doesn't take corners

underrated

>Diego Costa
>Isn't a barista

>Alan Shearer
>Never shaved the hair off of a Derby player

MIILLLLLLL