I am 30 yo and a virgin. AMA. Give me advice

I am 30 yo and a virgin. AMA. Give me advice.

You're the Virgin Marty

Virgin Harry

>I am 30 yo and a virgin.

Invest in a roll of duct tape and a ski mask, otherwise you're on your way to wizard status.

Virgin Barry

first.. dont think about that
>>bored of car captchas and save lives, fucking learn to be happy all of you fags

niggga, 30 is wizard, no if's and's or but's. Where you been?

Go see an escort.

The Virgin Larry

do you have any special powers? I'm 25 virgin and I can't wait these 5 years...

just buy a fucking hooker you loser

Same here, bro.
Normies don't understand.

Prostitute

At this point... there is no shame in paying.

pay for it, other ppl cant get sex even paying, there are ppl who dont live more than one year, but you virgins are special¿

>living in a city where all the prostitutes are either obese black women or meth ghouls.

I'd rather stay a virgin.

Go to the gym every day, work on your body/style first. Then date ugly chicks and move up the ladder.

Stop being a prudish bitch. Just pay for a hooker. You don't wanna die a virgin, do you? Use your hard-earned money to fly to a country where it's legal if you must.

Everything that Hollywood and literature have taught you about romantic sex is bullshit. In real life sex is messy, awkward, often incompatible, and highly overrated. Most girls just lie there putting little effort.

Going to a hooker ensures you have a great time with someone who knows what they're doing. It's also waaaay cheaper because you don't have to waste your money and your own personal time seducing and wooing the girl on a few dates before that first sexual encounter.

>Invest in a roll of duct tape and a ski mask, otherwise you're on your way to wizard status.
not sure how will it help me

>first.. dont think about that
Am I not supposed to solve the problem?

>niggga, 30 is wizard, no if's and's or but's. Where you been?
This. I am already a wizard.

>Go see an escort.
>Prostitute
>just buy a fucking hooker you loser
>pay for it, other ppl cant get sex even paying, there are ppl who dont live more than one year, but you virgins are special¿
I am afraid to get scammed or get AIDS or something. Don't earn much besides and don't see the point. I want to fuck a woman I have managed to seduce.

>do you have any special powers? I'm 25 virgin and I can't wait these 5 years...
sorry to disappoint you - no

I agree with what this guy said. Normally I'm against paying for sex. But it sounds as though you're pretty desperate man.

I'm 37 and haven;t seen pussy in 9 years. I'm a re-virgin.

Don't worry, you've not missed out on much m8.

I really am truly sorry. That must be a hell of a weight to carry. What's your social situation like? What leads to being 30yo virgin?

If you just go on as many random dates as possible, eventually you'll land a girl that happens to be horny that night for a hookup.

If your physical appearance is a barrier to getting laid, that's your fault and it's time to eat better and hit the gym.

Worked for me. I didn't even have to be forward, was just nice to girls and after a few drinks most of them get horny and want it.

Have sex. That'll fix it.

Yea. if you can up your game and date a girl its no issue, just fuck her and telle her after. Or get a one night stand, if you are not hot, you gotta hit on a lot of girls actively. If none of these pan out, fuck a whore, but give it a year trying thse two first.

Fucked my first girlfirend at 19,5, but it goes 1-2 years between fucks now, so this year I go a whore just to releave tention bacuse it had been 1,5 years since last. but yea, end of 2015 begining 2016 I got 4 girls total, then dry 1,5 years...

>re-virgin

Get a prostitute off Craigslist or backpage to get your 2 second but out of the way and to show you how motivating good pussy can be. And don't be getting those fat, out of shape whites either. Dave up like $300 to $500 and spend that on a half hour. You'll blow your load like 3 times anyway. Now that you know what great puss y is like, join a planet fitness, $10 a month and open 24 hrs so no excuses. Do a mix of cardio and weight lifting no matter how out of shape you let your lazy, ugly ass get. Eat clean, mostly near and vegitables. Have a cheat day if you need to. Get your hair in order mentally and physically this way, and if you're a broke ass, figure out a plan to make a career change. If you're successfyl, in sgape, and not an excuse making, stupid,last piece of trash eventually you'll come across a hot chick who wants you. Just figure out what's wrong with you. If your teeth are nasty, save up every penny and get new white ones. There is a solution to everything

I really am starting to hate these threads.

Go to a prostitute or extremely lower your standards.

Workout more. Do something with your hair.
Stop smelling like shit.

The answers are all so easy.

It's not the actual penetrative act that is so agonizing to be missing out on, it's just human intimacy. I'd kill for a person to talk to.

>I want to fuck a woman I have managed to seduce.
Good thinking. There will be no satisfaction with fucking a proz. You'll just feel worse. Work out. A lot.

Lose weight and get in shape.

You should have done that all through your 20s, so you'd have a good, muscular build by now.

>What's your social situation like? What leads to being 30yo virgin?

First of all, I am not very attractive. I also moved to another country when I was 18. I could not make friends here. People think I am awkward.

this guy fucking gets it

Is pretty obvious, tinder or escorts...

what country do you come from and what country you've moved in?

Who fucking cares? Women only reduce your quality of life. Your hand probably feels better anyways.

then seduce one, you will have good times, kids, and everything will go to shit soon, you will be worst than now, because you dont know what love and sex is...

What country are you in? Do you speak the mother language of the country? Listening to what the other anons have said. Proper diet, lots of exercise and lots of sunlight.

>responds to self "this gu fucking gets it"
doyoufeelbetter.htm

More info mate, from where to where, profession hobbies, skills?

Give us something to work with.

People who are not socially isolated do not understand social isolation and are unable to feel genuine empathy for those who are socially isolated.
OP, just kill yourself. That's what I did and I feel better than I have in a long time.

Put on the best looking clothes you've got go out tonight to your local bar get drunk find drunk slut take her home and.... Murder her

Well you're gonna have to take a chance. You can get a disease from a girl you just hook up with but you'd have done that if you were capable ten years ago.

So go see an escort. You get what you pay for so save up and see a decent one. They take safety very seriously as it's not just their livelihood but also their health at risk. Cover up, stay safe, and get this monkey off your back.

Also, you really need to step it up. You earn very little money and you're an anxious mess. Bad news: you're a virgin because of these things. They cling to you and they're incredible turn offs to women.

>bitches just want money

Don't be an idiot. A 30 year old who earns very little is likely a loser with no ambition. Better yourself, take care of yourself, and everything flows from that.

Buy a Slavic whore/mail order bride

The best advice is the advice you'll be incapable of taking, which is:
learn to recondition your desire for sex toward a desire for something else (career, food, travel, drugs, learning, whatever).

You'll be incapable of following this advice because you're a virgin. It'd be like telling a starving African kid to stop daydreaming about eating McDonalds some day. To the rest of us who have had enough McDonalds, and who know how subpar that food is, we've had our fill. We don't need it anymore. We don't want it anymore. We only eat it because it's cheap and readily available. Same thing goes for sex with women.

After 15+yrs of constant sex with a new girl every week, I can tell you that shit sucks, and I would rather masturbate to some good porn than have sex with women. I only do it out of evolutionary habit now. And because it comes so easy for me and I can actually afford it (shit costs money having to buy girls drinks and pay for their taxis and whatnot). But girls are annoying or boring as fuck sexually speaking. It's so overrated. I sometimes wish I had been born gay because I hear gay sex is far more satisfying than hetero sex.

If I had to stop having sex with women for the rest of my life in exchange for a million dollars, I'd take the million dollars in a heartbeat. Let that sink in for a moment.

It's ridiculously easy to get laid user. I don't consider myself attractive, I have a little beer gut, but not amerifat. Chicks don't give a fuck about physique and clothes and all that. They care about confidence, comfort, and protection.
Go the the bar like you don't give a fuck. Sit in the middle of everyone, not off to one corner, and act fucking confident. A girl will come up to you and say stupid shit like "you wanna buy me a drink?". Fuck that! If she fits within your standards, blurt out "let's take this shit out back". She's there for the same reasons you are, user. After that whatever goes.
The real problem is find one you want to keep around.

study well for you new role as wizard

I work out. I smell good. I just work all the time not having any time to socialize. My female colleagues are often married on in a relationship.

Poland -> Germany

>What country are you in? Do you speak the mother language of the country? Listening to what the other anons have said. Proper diet, lots of exercise and lots of sunlight.
Germany. I speak German pretty good (I have managed to get a Master's degree here); I didn't manage to get rid of accent though.

>More info mate, from where to where, profession hobbies, skills?
Poland -> Germany. I am partially of German blood. I am a programmer and like chess.

You just blew my mind. I've been actually content just downloading new porn every once in a while, while I jerk off to my fleshlight while looking at girls' facebook photos who I knew from highschool while high as fuck!

this guy is right, and im not gay

kys

I didn't see that coming.

also 30, but not virgin. i would have been in the same position as you OP if i hadn't just paid for sex. honestly, that's the easiest option. hookers are good because there's no mind games, and there's no bullshit. everything is completely open and honest.

>Tfw 4 years for my powers
>might kill myself before i get to lightning bolt my childhood bullies

>am a programmer and like chess
Act like you don't do any of that shit. Go fix a car and do some welding and get some sawdust on your pants. Pick up a chick all gruff and dirty. Women dig guys that fix and build shit. Just don't look like a homeless shitball.

All throughout highschool and college, no girls ever tried to talk to me or introduce themselves to me or invite me to a party. I'm a background person. Even if I tried to talk to people, I could tell I was being looked at as a nuisance, like "why is this person I don't know talking to me, doesn't he know I already have all the friends I need?". I could try to join into a conversation, but groups of people have a way of excluding outsiders. I wasn't fat before college. Once I realized nobody in the world notices me or cares that I exist, or is even willing to acknowledge that I might be trying to be friends, that's when I let my appearance and health fall to shit. And after college, I started working a shit job and have no friends. 10 years passed real fucking quick and I never once had anyone attempt to reach out to me. I feel like a teenage girl doing it, but I've started cutting myself, but people don't even notice the cuts all up and down my forearms. Nobody gives a shit. Nobody cares. I don't even have anything to hang myself from or a car to leave running in the garage I don't have.

I recommend the movie Don Jon if you have't seen it. It represents a man's struggle with the exact thing that I'm talking about: heterosexual sex getting boring after you've had a lot of it.

I also forgot to mention that I can't even scratch the surface beginning to explain how stressful and time-consuming the drama associated with sex is.

>the constant pregnancy scares (though I'm snipped now)
>the women with hidden STDs
>the false-rape accusers (had 2 of these)
>the women who want to have 4-hr-long heart-to-heart conversations after every sex
>the fall-in-love-after-first-sex women
>the jealous women
>the crazy women
>the women who are secretly married and have jealous husbands

The list goes on and on.

mfw people put this much value on pussy.

Again, it's not sex. I've gone 30 years without sex, which I doubt anyone who gets any would agree to, and that's fine. It's the complete isolation from society that has me contemplating falling on the tracks every time my train arrives. Normal people don't understand what it's like having no social safety net. If I dropped dead, today, the only people who would care are my coworkers, and only because they would have to pull double shifts.

You're a wizard now

LOL, I was a beast from 15-18, then I lost all my game because I'm a quick shot. Fml

>tfw member of optimal age master race

...

are you circumcised?

>the only people who would care are my coworkers, and only because they would have to pull double shifts.
Hate to break it to you, but this is like 99% of the rest of society. You're romanticizing something (social connections), making it out to be something much greater than it actually is. As a very social person, I can confirm to you that other than my family I've had 0 real friends in the past 12yrs or so. It's all a lie, it's a farce.

Everyone claims to be your friend or there for you until you're going through a crisis. Then you become a buzzkill or a burden. Then they'd rather leave you to it than help you through your problems.

Idk wtf you've been watch or reading, but people are a lot more selfish than you give them credit for. I know a shit ton of people who would ball their eyes out if I died... only to go right back to partying later that evening like nothing happened. In fact, a lot of people would use my death as an excuse to show others that they've endured a "painful loss."

It's all bullshit, OP. Focus on yourself because for the most part, not matter how many friends you have, nobody cares about you. And that's more painful than feeling like you have no one around you at all.

Nobody cares. Nobody.

Well, you like chess, join a chessclub, even if you only got time to go once a month it helps, maybe you make friends there, they come over watch moves with you on the weekend.

I created my own Sci-fi club in Bergen to meet people with my interests. 5 years ago, monthly meetings with 5-15 people, some became friends. I also joined table top gaming club, they are hardcore, I just like it a bit, but get to hang put with people.

If you have no time outside work, you need to cut down, say no to overtime from time to time, or something, work to live, dont live to work.

...

Get a chick off plentyoffish.
Its free and easy for one night stands.

How does it feel to be the only virgin in the world, LOSER?

don't be mean to a fellow user. :c

I've spent the last 30 years focusing on myself and it turned me into a bitter suicidal shut in.

I'm not the chess fan, but two things:
1. "clubs" are not a thing off college campuses
2. You can be fired for refusing to work overtime in the US.

Employers are allowed to treat employment as a luxury/privilege, rather than a right/necessity.

40 yo here, pussy is overrated tbh. I’ve had countless sexual partners over the years and was even married for like 10 years and I prefer jerking off and playing video games more than being in a relationship or getting laid. Deal with women long enough and you’ll discover that for yourself.

Funny. Socializing with friends is what turned ME into a bitter suicidal shut in. Though I've dropped the suicidal part because there's no point in taking my own life while they continue to live it up and have a blast.

yeah women are all drama.

You are not op, I dont know your deal, Op lives in Germany and likes chess, so good advice for him, and I dont know about US but in Europe clubs for adults is a thing, like from knitting to pole dancing.

thank you for your advice!!!

>How does it feel to be the only virgin in the world, LOSER?
pretty sure I am not the only one.

This goes back to the "starving african" analogy.
Just because a starving african can live off a thimble of poopwater and 5 grains of rice a day, doesn't mean they are likely to appreciate a fat american telling them pizza is overrated (while they gorge themselves on it every week). The guys who say sex is overrated are just trying to make themselves feel better for living a life others might be envious of.

That is correct, Sex is tha bomb! so fuckin nice,m like pizza even bad sex is good. Sure some chad that fucks 2-3 bitches might tire after a few years. but for anyone else. No way.

Ghoul sex seems kind of hot tbh

hooker

>sex isn't worth it
>sex is SO worth it it's worth doing a complete life overhaul just to get in the game

Okay but, a starving African can’t eat a pizza anyway, he either wouldn’t have the stomach capacity or his body would go into shock from all the calories. If dude is a 30 year old virgin, he’s got bigger problems than not knowing how to get laid. If you and I went in on a prostitute for op and she showed up at his door butt ass naked, he probably wouldn’t let her in.

30 is fucking wizard? im probably gonna be a wizard in the future then.

I'm a 30 year old virgin because I have an unhealthy codependent relationship with my mother. I don't have the life skills or finances to be independent.

Hire an escort if you don't want a prostitute. No reason for anyone to be a virgin in the present.

...

Escorts ARE prostitutes.
Escort is the word they use in areas where prostitution is illegal.
The idea is that escort is just being paid to "escort" you, i.e. keep you company. Officially, you aren't paying them for sex and if sex happens it is (officially) unrelated to any business transaction you make with them. one problem with this is that escorts can easily decide they don't want to fuck after you pay them 600 dollars to eat dinner wit them.

If only I had a motel I could murder women in, then I'd be fine.

So like a whore lottery then... LOL

I'm 40 and still a virgin, consider yourself lucky.

I got really drunk and fell asleep on a couch. I ended up peeing my self. How do i clean the couch it has beem 2 days so far

my sides are in orbit

It's not abusive or sexual, it's just that being single led my mom to establish behavioral expectations. Like "needing help around the house". She's "graciously" allowing me to live at home rent free as long as I "help out". So she doesn't have to be alone and I don't have to be responsible.

Just go gay. But I think this choice is still impossible for a wizard such as you.

In regards to seeing an escort.

Would you ever give out ID if they request it?

>I fell down a crevasse and broke both my legs and spine once I hit the bottom
>consider yourself lucky that you are still falling and haven't hit the bottom yet

Only if they say "I want you to pay me to have sex with you" first.

Well, living at home gonna make it hard to get laid, dating someone is not gonna go past 1st date once they find out, one night stand when you suggest getting a hotel room is gonna make them think you have a wife and cant go to your place. Get out get laid.