Post things that your gf doesn’t know about you

Post things that your gf doesn’t know about you

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I crie some times because it's really really hard but I love her to much to let go.

I would but I never had a gf

I like all sorts of porn (while not considered weird here, it would be very strange to my normie gf) that she doesn't know about. I don't find her physically attractive, either.

I smoke weed when she is not home

She is a very strict Christian and she wouldn’t approve

Doesn't the bible have some reference to cannabis oil being used to anoint someone in it tho?

It's certainly no worse for you than Christ's blood.

why date her if you dont find her attractive?

>tfw no gf

my wife doesnt know i do opiates heavily or knows about my porn folder

I cheat on her on a daily basis

That i exist

Girl in pic is Lena Paul, porn actress. Thank me later.

Jesus.

When I was younger me and a friend saw two girls play outside. When they left, they had both forgotten their coats. We took the coats into some bushes en came mostly in the insides of the coats. Eventually put them back in the same spot and watched them wear it (from a distance) when they came back for them.

She doesnt know that i have another pillow

That I post pictures of her here.
That I want an MFM threesome with her
That I want her to masturbate on omegle
That I want to fuck her on omegle
That I want her to go topless on the beach with just a tiny thong / wicked weasel
That I jerk it to pictures of our hot as fuck neighbor

You get the idea

>Smoke cigarettes when she's not around because it upsets her that it could kill me
>Still wank to pics and vids that my ex sent me

Been with her nearly 2 years now.

Her sister has tasted my cum.

One of my best female friends sucks my dick when I ask her to. It started off where she would only jerk me off because "that isnt cheating" but ive worked her up to being naked while she does it and giving me head. shes got a weird morality system.

That id rather jerk to porn then have sex because its less work and the women are hotter

That I'm a closet bisexual and that I love anal play. I was single for about 3 years and was curious so fucked around a lot. Nobody would suspect it. I'm a tradesman, 25, 6'0, fairly fit, scruffy, bit of a dad bod kek.

Topped 4 twinks when I was single. Really want to bottom for a good hung top but i never had a chance. Not enough of a degenerate to cheat. And gf is wife material.

Guess I'll just stick to fucking my own ass when she's away

>opiates
so you're what's ruining the fucking communities

And I can take as long as I want. She doesn't like it when it goes on for a while, when she cums she's done. The longer I fuck the better my orgasm is. I nearly always have a better orgasm when watching porn for only this reason

I prefer porn because the women actually look good. My ol lady was hot till we got married.

Nah, it's the cartels and the drug wars that function to protect the cartels.

The fentanyl analogues and our love of prescriptions is a real problem, but we're only making it worse by prolonging the drug war and locking non-violent petty offenders up instead of focusing on reform and harm reduction.

People like Scott Gottlieb, Alex Azar, etc, are ruining your communities.

That's a shame. Mine has gotten better since we married.

YEAH!
No Narcan for you, druggie!

lol something similar happens to me, with a cousin she only gave me handjobs and i finger her pussy, that was at first, now we have oral sex sometimes or she dry hump me untill she came, she doesnt wanna fuck cause is "wrong" lol pic related is her

i did the let go thing today user

dont know how i feel about it yet but it was hard as shit, dont attempt if you're not headstrong

Exactly this. Minus the neighbor thing

Whit who? Cate yo greentext?

I get my gf black out drunk and/or high in MDMA so I can ass rape her. She hates anal with a passion so I'll just get her blacked out and then just pin her down and force my cock jnto her ass. She cries and screams the first few min but just submits after and even enjoys it sometimes. Funny enough she's only ever complained about ass pains once. And she never remember ladies a thing. Been doing it for years.

But it wouldn't be wrong if _I_ fucked her, would it? 'Cause she's pretty hot.
Name and number?

my girl doesn't know shit about andy's shit

Well, she would have, wouldn't she?!

I get my gf high on MDMA and harvest her organs. She's woken up three times in a bathtub full of ice, doesn't remember a thing, and still hasn't figured it out.

During my formative years I had a long term sexual relationship with my cousin. Ive greentexted it on Sup Forums before.

That i have more than 1 gf.

This is true

Sorry :(

everyone in the thread is a lying faggot

>hurr duur yea Sup Forumsros can you believe it? I fucked my mom my cousins my aunt AND my sister all in one day! "For the win" amirite people

That I fuck her younger sister

You got anything to add to my list? I'm open to new ideas

I love feet and ass oics but mainly ass. Nothing better than smelling a woman's ass during doggy style.

His sister

Wont smoke a pure plant provided by her almighty god for the people who he gave a endocannabinoid system.

Distilled alcohol prob fine tho.
Bet shes fucked out of wedlock
Bet she thinks women should hold positions of power or are able to teach.

Stop smoking, not because it will kill you, but because it will be the slowest most expensive and anxiety inducing way to die

>Nothing better than smelling a woman's ass
so... basically, shit? You like the smell of shit?
You should move to Europe or Cali with the low flow toilets. Whole houses smell like shit. It's teh bomb.

you are such a faggot user MDMA doesn't cause memory loss. If anything you remember more because it's a stim . Next time you sell this bullshit story on the internet try benzos or barbituates mixed with alcohol...
dubs logged and that's fucking hot. Crazy how she hasn't noticed any symptoms of not having three organs that she previously had

i feel bad for her
>That I want an MFM threesome with her
faggot

ikr she is pretty hot, she send me selfies like this every day, sometimes she says she loves me, i never answer back i just wanna fuck her im obssesed with her

That logic makes as much sense as much sense as if you raped someone and then defended it by saying well don't worry about me that guy raped three people!...so here's this for you:
AT LEAST I DON'T SPEND MY TIME SUCKING DICKS IN THE BATHROOM AT OLIVE GARDEN. YOU DIRTY LOWDOWN SLIMY FILTHY DISGUSTING GLUTTONOUS HOGLIKE MOTHER FUCKING COCK SUCKING SON OF AN INCESTUOUS PEDOPHILE SHEMALE RAPIST PROSTITUTE. GET YOUR MOM'S DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH. DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO? I'M GONNA SHIT SO FAR UP YOUR ASS. STOP FOR A MOMENT AND REALLY GRASP THAT STATEMENT. I AM LITERALLY GOING TO SHIT UP YOUR ASS. I WILL TAKE MY PANTS OFF, RIP YOUR PANTS OFF, OUR SPHINCTERS WILL TOUCH, AND I WILL SHIT. YOU WILL TRY TO COUNTERSHIT. BUT MY SPHINCTER WILL OVERCOME. AND I WILL PUSH A LOG OF SHIT FROM MY ASS UP INTO YOUR BODY. THIS IS WHAT SHALL OCCUR WHEN I FIND YOUR KEYBOARD FUCKING FACE. YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE? I WILL PISS INTO A POT. I WILL ADD CORNSTARCH TO THE PISS AND BOIL IT UNTIL IT GETS REALLY THICK, LIKE SAUCE. I WILL POUR THE THICKENED PISS INTO A PLASTIC CONTAINER AND PUT IT IN THE FRIDGE UNTIL IT HARDENS INTO A FIRM JELLO. THEN I WILL THEN CUT IT INTO RECTANGLES. BATTER IT IN A MIX OF MILK, FLOUR, AND EGGS. AND DEEP FRY IT AT 375 UNTIL GOLDEN BROWN, FLIPPING ONCE SINCE THEY FLOAT. AND I WILL SERVE YOU MY DEEP FRIED PISS. THAT'S WHAT YOU GET FOR BEING SUCH A FAGGOT. COCKMUFFIN

0/10 never let go. Fight til you both die user! Get her back!

once a month i treat myself to an escort

So sad that we're still dealing with this nonsense in 2018.

Wanna fix the opioid crisis? Take down the majority of gun violence?

Easy, end the drug war, but alas we have the several people in office who are in the pocket of the prison industrial complex and pharma... and those are some deep pockets.

At least more and more Americans are waking up to the fact though. Sorry for preaching to the choir, but it's frustrating to see our countrymen brought to their knees by the drug war when the solution is so obvious.

Supply and demand, don't think the cartels are forcing the demand.

>once a month i treat myself to a
dose of herpes and HPV.

Thought I was gay in college and fucked/got fucked with some dudes.

Came to the conclusion I'm bisexual. I can go for sex with a dude if I had to and get turned on by super hot guys but for the most part , all girls , any race/ethnic group or skinny/athletic/thick/fat/muscular get me hard.

Just not really sure it matters much to tell her about it. Although I do joke about guys sometimes when some 10/10 dudes show up every now and then but she just thinks I'm being funny.

>have an abortion
>be pro-life

>have multiple failed marriages
>against fag misery through marriage

>against abortion
>against birth control

The list goes on and on.

I beat off to pics of her sister

I'm more gay than straight. She's okay, but have you seen balls that glisten under a layer of lube? Beautiful.

tl;dr

Do some homework and get back to me, Mr. Salty.

I spend way to much time of Sup Forums with you fuckwits.

God, it's so humiliating, but I can't stop!

This

cartels would be little, local, cuck bad-boy clubs if A. American drug policy didn't literally create a massive black market economy for them to operate in and B. if American consumers didn't have to most voracious appetite for drugs in the world

I Upload her nude Pics

I was about to say "she doesn't know I want to fuck a shemale and suck his dick" but I confessed to it some weeks ago and she is ok with me trying just one time (you bet!)

But she doesn't know my brother and I sucked each other off when we were little, respectively 10 and 14
Nobody know, in fact
I hope

The demand isn't going anywhere, but we do know that there are less harmful alternatives and ways to spend way less money by focusing on harm reduction and rehabiliation instead of criminization and spending way more by keeping them locked up and policing non-violent drug offenses.

“See, if you look at the drug war from a purely economic point of view, the role of the government is to protect the drug cartel. That's literally true.”

― Milton Friedman

Same huge same
Except neighbor shit

My community is ran by a half dozen old guys, their wives, my gf's boss, and the "mayor".
I have no idea who Scott or Alex is, I'm in a town of 120 people.

What else is on your lists?

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA oh man. You have no fucking idea what you are talking about kid. Get a bitch drunk as fuck and give her a pill and she's completely gone my dude. You don't know shit you fucking virgin kek

Word. Cannabis legalization is already hurting them while the states with it legal rec have lower opioid addiction rates. Addicts with legal access to MMJ will even choose it over illicit drugs after a period of about six months.

Not even considering all the money in brings in at the state level, all the money saved not going after low level offenders is huge.

you being a pill head isn't ok just because the big bad pharma or government want you to be

sad life

So what exactly did the woman in your pic and her male cousin do to you?

There must be something for you to start throwing dirt at them like that.

She thinks weed makes me lame and unfun to be around

I'm a closet bisexual. I love sucking cock and want to take one I the ass but I haven't since I don't want to cheat on her.

Thank you.
this is the shit i mean because i live in a similar community. I don't think that those fuckers he mentioned are making the rednecks sling xanax into my town

I posted her because she looks like me gf

Whenever I watch her vids I think of her

Are you me

I'm not a pill head though, I smoke pot, legally. That's it.

Advocating against prohibition isn't the same as being a junkie, no matter how much you wish it were true.

I jerk off to other female friends
I want her to upload more sexy pics to her social media like she used to
And I wish she would wear more skimpy stuff when we went out

I love the smell of her daughters panties. Sometimes I'm lucky enough to find them wet and filled with cum when she gets home from seeing her boyfriend

Not really, I'm in a town in North Dakota ran by a handfull of stoners from the 60s, my gfs boss who loves us, and a handful of old women who like both baking and being baked.

Or you can just tell her you love anal play and she'll fuck you
I love it

This is the problem with a parochial view.

You have no idea how your bumfuck town is being heavily impacted by systems, not individuals.

Your cousin Cleetus isn't ruining your community, he's a symptom of a greater illness.

>North Dakota
again, sad life.

Fiance doesnt know that I

>Like to fap while wearing women's panties, but not hers for some reason
>Am somewhat of an ephebophile
>Can fap to beastiality from time to time
>One of my ultimate fantasies is to cheat on her

I want to see her get fucked so I can eat her cum filled pussy

I do this too, but it's mainly because she doesn't like the smell and is afraid I'd get caught.

Related

>I went to college with Lena Paul
>Name was Pauline Gibson (you can see how she got her name)
>Used to be curly haired, shirt, kind and nerdy

Just thinking out loud here, but I'm guessing, if you're a chick, it's tough to look at him the same way after you've jammed a strap on up his ass at his request.
This guy really father material for my child? Maybe not so much.

lol fuck me,
I mean she was shy and kind of nerdy

>never smelled a clean ass

I've been contemplating it, but unsure. She's quite vanilla in bed and quite conservative.

Three of the guys grow weed for themselves and their families.
And the weed I smoke is out dated stuff from a grow in Colorado that i get for under $10/gram

i actually want to suck a bbc with her but i cant say to her because i prohibited threesome with other men due jealousy so doing that would be hypocrisy

you can belive me or not i dont care but it is the truth

My huge fap pack xn--kn8h.to/rsbo

nigger i know that drugs are a government controlled economy im just saying buying them and doing them is making yourself a customer to the pharma fags. fuck. thats why states are legalizing grass they dont give a fuck until they can make money on it. they realized it was a good industry so they legalized it. thats why they have opiates because the government cant exactly sling heroin.