Walk into your living room -- see this. What do?

Walk into your living room -- see this. What do?

Vomit profusely

probably fuck it
i have like, negative standards.

Feed it milk and doughnuts till it weighs 900 lbs then fuck it furiously for days

Shoot it with my UV gun

feign compliance and tell it i'm going to fuck it.
move in closer. but it's a ruse.
empty a can of spray foam into its cunt
it is now sealed up and unable to impose itself upon the world

Call the police

An hero. But with six bullets, I only need one, so I'd heroically empty five into it hoping I could spare the rest of the world from the trauma I've just suffered.

12 Gauge slugs m'boy.

Cut it up with my lightsaber.

Finally accept the hard truth that granny needs to be put into an old people's home.

do that shit and pull a Hillary, DENY DENY DENY

WHO THE FUCK PARKED THEIR JEEP IN MY HOUSE!

...

Call to a priest and see the efects of holy water on it

in mathematical terms, that graph suggests an upswing

Traps

Eat that cunny like I'm a starving Nigger and KFC took over the American red cross. Shove my dick in her hole and bite down on those tits. Cum deep inside her and walk 360° out the door.

I'd jackhammer that ass until every muscle in my body gave out.

id chain her up and have a reverse Jabba the hutt situation going.

nigger spotted

MOAR

Checked.

... pretty sure the proper response is

"MAN THE HARPOONS"

Someone took this picture, and she posed for it.

Remember that....

While we make jokes about this grotesque creature, it still has a partner and you don’t.

Fuck...

...

>wat is a timer

It would be hard to move a lard mountain that weights a ton. Would just pinch that thing until it crawled away crying.

...

can it even crawl?

The first thing I would do would be to ask what it was like to have held Princess Leia Hostage and what Tatooine is like.........

...

I'd fuck her, i am pissed off at my dick and trying to get even.

Walk out

Can't be unsmelled... An Hero

hail satan

whip my cock out, lick her pussy and go to town... then get the kissing going. hopefully last at least 20 mins as she's pretty hot.

Evacuate

Who the fuck are you. Get out of my house.

Turn 360°, walk away.

This is the type of woman I fuck with anyway so I'm gonna bury my face in that snatch. Hopefully it's dirty and stinks bad because I'm kinky.

...

...

Give me moar of this fat beast OP

turn several thousand degrees and fly into outer space orbit.

>has a partner

as if ten second camera timers were never invented. were you born yesterday?

I would but I would also fuck just about anyone. I think I have only turned down 2 people for sex my whole life.

"that's the scariest fucking thing I've seen in my whole life"

Implying it would take less than ten seconds for her to push the timer, sit down, raise those mountains of lard called legs and split them evenly. Then she moves her arms after finishing the work of propping her legs up with them evenly into a beckoning posture. All the while remembering to force the fat up with what little muscle she has on her face for a smile.

10 seconds my ass.

I would Kevin Spacey it:

"Seeing you here like this has given me a chance to look back upon the choices I've made in my life and I would just like to proudly announce that I'm gay."