Halloween Horror to Avoid

Post recommended horror ""kino"" that ended up sucking to save other anons from falling prey to the terrible terrible garbage that is most horror.

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That was p. good. You really have to decide for yourself if you think you are gonna like a movie or not.

Trick r Treat any good? I hear mixed things

Breh that Hollywood ending was extra bad. The dialogue got irredeemable when ed and lorraine told each other how scared they were for each other. Not to mention when the little girl said she has two angels or whatever.

>when he starts singing and playing the guitar

>when none of the film happened in real life and the girl admitted to faking everything

boring garbage

House of the Devil

House of the devil is 45 minutes of a girl eating pizza and walking around outside trying to get a job house sitting.

Then it's another 45 minutes of her walking around a house eating more pizza.

Then the last 5 minutes is Rob Zombie bullshit and the only part of the film where something actually happens.

Trick r Treat reminds me a lot of the Goosebumps tv show, but rated R. Same kind of aesthetic. I thought it was a fun film.

yeah, that's what really irked me. They say, in the film "we have no proof of anything except that she's faking it" and then they go rushing back to save the family because "she was faking that she faked it!"

Agreed. It's just a guy watching films and jump scares. And then at the very end... he watches the rest of the films! Sinister would have been way better if it were just the murder scenes released on youtube with no explanation.

just watched sinister 2, it was god fucking awful. i love shitty movies but it was even shitty at being shitty.

trick r treat is genuinely one of my favorite halloween movies, if not my favorite. the thing is though, it's not a horror movie, it's a "halloween" movie. It really captures the essence of halloween in the imagery and set design.

avoid it, has no distinct plot and the stories in it are pretty awful, would've been better if they just stuck to one plot.

The Lady in Black

I've seen a lot of other anons say the same thing, but pic related was utter garbage. Marketers are getting out of hand on here these days.

>House of the Devil

I thought it was shit too, but this scene was qt as fuck

youtube.com/watch?v=KPI4iYlAEeE

really, this was bad? from the trailer it looked about as simple a concept as a horror movie could have. what made it terrible?

It was absolute tripe even the spoops were all jump scare garbage it just loses everything when they start introducing some bulls hit science theory as to why the monster is what it is and man did it flop right there

Of the ones I've watched this October:

In The Mouth of Madness (Not bad, but certainly not good, watched it earlier this week and already forget what it was about)
Phantasm (Again, not bad, not good, not kino)
The Fog (Forget everything, Tom Atkins bad)
It (Dollar store Stand By Me with like three minutes of clown over three hours of movie)
Halloween III (Not horror/Halloween related outside of the jingle, sci-fi with dumbass robots, Tom Atkins bad)

the world really would be better off without you in it.

Basically this and cringe dialogue, I can forgive a horror movie logic if it's actually scary but it failed on every front and the 'story' was just mind bogglingly retarded

>monster was a friend of their mom's when she was in an assylum
>sensitive to light, doctors tried to force her to adapt to the light but end up killing her
>supposedly she's still alive as some dark creature....but their mom can only talk to her when she's crazy
>the monster dies when their mom kills herself
>so it was all in her head, I guess?
>but she was a real person living on the light spectrum or something

What the fuck were they thinking

I liked it. Ethan Hawke is my nigga though. And Sinister's soundtrack is fantastic

>mouth of madness, phantasm and the fog
>bad
noose immediately

Halloween III and It are pure kino and makes me really question the other criticisms you've posted.

>It
>Kino
Not him, but when was the last time you've watched? It has not aged well.

>pseudo intellectuals attempt to pick apart fucking horror films the thread
Boy this board is shit.

Goodnight Mommy

The trailer is very good:
youtube.com/watch?v=0kXpUaQpXMA
The _______twist was far too easy to see coming, which ruined the film for me.

go back to your Walking Dead and capeshit threads then

Who exactly was doing that?

>which ruined the film for me
I didn't see the twist and still did not enjoy the film. It's just like any "one or more of the characters aren't real" twists, but more obnoxious because they are twins, so you don't even bother distinguishing them while you're watching it.

House of the devil is great you piece of shit

I'm pretty sure there's only one person on Sup Forums who likes House of the Devil.

want to see it follows or you're next.

which one should I avoid or which should I watch first.

It Follows is a much better movie, or at least certainly a more creative one.

House of the Devil is praised more than disliked, on Sup Forums.

Jesus christ, what oblivious and terrible taste.

I've seen only one thread about it and it was mine shitting on it.

>i've seen only one thread about it

There's probably your issue. The fact that its a slow, slow, slow burn is an aspect i've seen people talk highly of; but i can see how people dislike that aspect all the same.

It's not so much a slow burn as "How much filler imitating an 80s movie can we put in"? If you want a slow burn, the perfect examples are The Shining, Psycho, Alien, etc.. Actually, pretty much every great horror movie does this. It really boggles my mind how much incredibly meaningless scenes people are willing to accept in horror movies merely because they're supposed to be buildup. Which basically means a director can put total filler in them and people will be on the edge of their seats the entire time because they think something actually will happen at any moment, getting more and more anxious the longer it goes.

I would think the House of the Devil made this questionable practice a bit too blatant, but people ate that shit up, for whatever reason I can't tell.

It Follows is garbage, it's third act is about as terrible as one gets.

Fan Fucking tactic anI'm. Highly recommended

Still better than You're Next.

Did you ride the short bus into this post?

Did you ride the short bus into this post with the other retard?

How does one have oblivious taste?

I second this. It was shit.

third act completely JUSTs what was a rather great movie

DON"T watch:

Babadook
Insidious
Any Paranormal Activity
Any Conjuring

That's all I know for sure. Stay away.

>Babadook
Perhaps watch it if you want to sympathize with widows raising children.

Don't watch Babadook.....
Are you a fucking moron, user?

But it was all enjoyable to me. Also all of it helped to set the scene for the finale.

>But it was all enjoyable to me
I guess I was impressed that they were so able to perfectly recreate the feeling of 80s films, even the lighting, while still looking modern enough, but this doesn't amount to anything meaningful as far as the story went. Perhaps if they actually had a proper horror story build up, this would have been an added bonus, but that's the entire draw.

>Also all of it helped to set the scene for the finale.
You don't bother qualifying this. Do you mean even the utterly pointless scene where they're eating Pizza and it tastes bad somehow relates to the satanic ritual, or it helped it because it was a build up?

Literally Nothing Happens: The Movie

Why is this considered a classic? Or even scary? It's fucking laughable.

jump off cliff

>grouping Babadook with those movies

kill
you are
self

The pizza tasted bad because they drugged it.

...

man Kingdom hearts got spooky.

That scene includes exposition relevant to that plot, about how she needs money.
It is also relevant to the ritual in that her friend says "The pizza tastes weird *today" impying they eat there on a regular basis, and that the cult specifically selected her and stalked her. Later the man keeps putting emphasis on her getting pizza, because there's something in it she needs to consume for it.

>The thing
Only good thing were the practical effects
>Cabin in the woods:
Simply bullshit, people pretend to like it because it's ironic or meta or whatever but it's not better than a 'Scary Movie'/parody movie, basically the lowest tier film possible
>The witch
Basically drama, fails as a 'horror' movie.

Did this go over your head? The guy who kills her friend delivers the pizza. She puts it down after several bites because it tastes weird. Minutes later she collapses and wakes up during the ritual.

I don't think those other movies were good enough to be treated like that user.

Even if babadook was bad.

Actually, I now realize you didn't know what scene I was talking about. It was the one where they were in the pizza parlor, discussing I'm not sure what, and then they complain that it wasn't made well that day. I fail to see how this has anything to do with the climax of the film. I think they might have discussed getting a job, but the previous part of the film established nothing but she has that friend and she needs money.

>about how she needs money.
In that regard, it's redundant, as that was established elsewhere.

>and that the cult specifically selected her and stalked her.
user, you are grasping at straws. She wasn't specifically selected, there was an ad and she was the only one that answered it because her friend had removed the other ads. There would have been no way to ensure she saw the ad, knowing she needed the money that badly, etc. You're making the movie worse by assuming such stupidly implausible assumptions.

Even if all those assumptions are valid, (they aren't), it doesn't help the finale, but just provides a reason to get her in the house and why she ordered pizza.

Pretty stupid for you to confuse this. I obviously wasn't talking about the scene and dislikes it.

>pretty stupid for you to confuse my nonsensical bitching about pizza

Yeah, ok.

You are an object that needs to be burned and sent into a black hole.

and every other strayn horror flick

I hope you choke on Data.

>utterly pointless scene where they're eating Pizza and it tastes bad
Not sure how you could confuse this with the scene where she eats the pizza that drugs here, which she reacts to by being visibly disgusted.

>session 9
If you can stand bad acting watch this movie, it's actually pretty good. otherwise don't, the acting really REALLY kills what could have been a classic.

Just because you guys are pussies afraid of retarded rednecks doesn't mean you need to misdirect that aggression at me.

...

List some horror flicks you like then

Nah dude she was specifically chosen. She's a clean freak, virgin type. The contrast between her and her friend is intentional to emphasize this. The location was chosen because it was the best place to view the eclipse. They're not gonna pick some random whore to birth the antichrist.

And if this was what they intended, they completely failed. There's no evidence whatsoever within the movie that indicated they specifically targeted her. I'm sure they could have given that impression despite your assumptions which I don't think hold much validity, but they didn't do it.

This is all just to make that scene in the pizza parlor purposeful. If they targeted her, it actually makes the movie worse because of how implausible it is.

Ooooooookay Jonah Hill. What is your ideal Horror film?

Why is it implausible.

This was amazing to be honest, it kept me engaged the whole way through and the fucking scene where she runs into her dead self was haunting.

What was that one movie where the cut a horse into a bunch of pieces with glass panels and slide them apart so you could see all the insides?

It's not that easy to figure out that somebody needs money merely by watching them. I don't remember the timing, but she clearly needed it then because she began renting a house and needed to give a downpayment then. They would also have to know she babysits and would be interested in that job, that she would find the ads for it, that she was available for that night, etc.

Also, they even said they didn't get any other calls for the job which is a detail they wouldn't have mentioned unless there was a cause and effect between her friend removing all the ads from the campus and her being the one called.

The story never once indicates that they were looking for someone in particular to be the host. That was bullshit you completely made up. Even if that were the case, it's more plausible they would have just rejected any girls who arrived and weren't adequate.

>establishling shot of the UK
>london calling is playing


Literally turmed the movie off right there

So what are some good horror films?

Watched Event Horizon and Ninth Gate this week, watching the last two episodes of Stranger Things right now.

Is Black Mirror good?

This movie completely changed my attitude to horror movies. Before seeing this I loved stuff like Saw and all Rob zombie's shit. Then I reluctantly watched this, and realized that when it comes to horror, less is more.

>I loved stuff like Saw
>when it comes to horror, less is more.
I guess any actual horror and not torture porn would make that apparent, even something as dull as the Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

I think alot of people have that gore=cool mentality through their edgy teenage phase. Horror movies that are actually good films are a rarity

>Trick r Treat reminds me a lot of the Goosebumps tv show, but rated R
That's a good ass explanation

For a relatively low budget movie, i gotta respect what they did, still sucks.

>tfw this will never be topped

I went to see this with a group of friends. The entire audience was in tears throughout, it was hilariously awful. It was kinda odd, my group for a short time became friends with the stranger neighboring group. With one the thing in common being this God awful film.

The brief bits with Leatherface made me jump, but the screaming at the end can be excessive at times.

But the protagonist is so damn qt

videodrome pleb

The Cell

Jacobs ladder if you haven't seen it.

Probably one of those few really good horror movies due to the subject matter being scary not the attempts.

fuck off i liked it

is this good?
Looks like the definition of an early 00s movie.

People hyped this so much that when they had that lame cell phone video reveal at the end I was like "that's it?" and absolutely hated it. It was nothing special throughout.

Nah, if you want something with a similar aesthetic but executed much more brilliantly (note: aesthetic, not plot, they're dissimilar thematically) check out The Fall with Lee Pace

Is this hackson's lowest ebb?

It's literally his best film, you pleb faggot.

that is the stupidest name I have ever seen.

It's utter garbage. Did you watch it when you were 12?

I agree, the bride is pretty creepy but aside from that it is just too fucking boring