nationalreport.net
>AUSTIN, Tex. – The Texas House sent a clear message in opposition to the “disturbing man bun hairstyle” with a 143-0 bipartisan vote outlawing the trend. First offenders will receive a stiff fine, and repeat offenders will face possible jail time.
>Not to be confused with the Sikh top knot, worn higher on the head and often covered with a turban, the man bun’s origin is more stylistically connected to Hollywood, and the hipster crowd.
>"That wasn’t gonna play in Texas,” said bar owner Ken Davis, author of the original Texas Anti-Man Bun petition. “You can’t tell the girls from the boys these days anyway, especially after the Bruce Jenner business and that LBTBXYZ crowd or whatever you call it.”
>Davis celebrated the bill’s passage by buying a round of drinks for his regulars.
“See the guy at the end of the bar?” asked Davis. “Well, he’s a Fairy. Now he can do whatever he wants at home, but in here, and out on the street, that’s not right.”
>Steve Fairy, a younger member of Davis’ regular crowd, says he still has 60 days to wear his man bun before the law goes into effect. “It’s not a style thing, it just keeps my hair out of the way. Everyone says ‘Why don’t you just cut your hair shorter?’ Well, dammit I don’t want to cut my hair shorter, and nobody can make me cut my hair shorter – not you, not the government, not even Obama. First they take my bun, next they take my gun, which is what he’s doing anyway.”
>Davis was happy to learn that members of the medical community advise against the man bun. “On the news they said wearing the damn thing makes you go bald, and who the heck wants to go bald? People will listen up now”, he added.
>“Last thing we need around here is a bunch of baldheaded hippies running around town turning Texas into another New York City, then going to the doctor on their Obamacare with me footin’ the bill!”
