Choose wisely

choose wisely

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you did it wrong nigger

Kek 12mil or 100 bucks and a lifelong orgasm..... rather 12mil thanks buddy.

uhhh 12m easy

he means $100 per orgasm. If you fap twice you get $200

If I masturbate once a day for the next forty years that'll only be 1.5 million so I'll take the twelve

Still, 12Mil you can safely re-invest and have an lifelong income per se.

I know, I was just clarifying.

Only an idiot would chose #2

do I want lots of money or lots of money?
ill take lots of money
gg

Still $12 million. Are you a potato

Oh shit. It's Sup Forums again, my bad.

12 million, I'd have to jerk off a long, long time to get close to that amount of money only getting 100 bucks a pop.

I'd do the orgasm thing BECAUSE I dont think I could handle 12 mill lmao and plus I wouldnt want my family all over me for the money once I get 12 mill
If its only a little amount I could lie and say it come from investments or some shit (I know I could say that with 12m too but I dont trust myself not to die of substance abuse with that money)

This risk of having $12M all at once is that most people would blow it all, they'd fuck it up somehow.

I'd love to be able to pay my rent simply by fapping 15x in a month. That's once every other day, I do that anyway. If I'm broke, just fap. Need gas, fap. Bag of weed, fap. New TV, fap 5 times. Go out to a nice restaurant, fap twice. I could pull that off no problem, I'm kind of doing that anyway. Maybe I'd marry a nympho, that'd be like extra free money too.

I would need to have 7 orgasms every day for 50 years to make 12 mil

just give me the 12 mil now please

12 mil easy

What should you choose if it was
1) $12 million

2) $100 / masturbation stroke or slick

It's like your dick is your ATM machine.

>This risk of having $12M all at once is that most people would blow it all, they'd fuck it up somehow.

maybe simpletons

2. I'd make over 12 million in a week if you include ghost loads.

$12M isn't a lot of money. Nowadays people barely even want to retire with less than $7M. That shit's not going to last a whole life.

Take da 12mill. I'd have to have 500 fucking orgasms a day to make the alternative pay off

If you could jerk off six times a day, it would take 53 years to get to 12,000,000 in 100 increments.

12mil easy

You're an idiot who will never retire with anything close to 7 million dollars.

$12m because i'm gonna jerk off either way, i rather do it for fun rather than obligation

$12m in bank will make over $100 a day in interest anyway

How come word problems weren't like this in school? I'd have paid more attention in math.

That's actually bullshit, I'll make that easy. I'm at $2M now, saving like a motherfucker and I've got over 25 years to go.

Retards, do you know how much youd have to fap to get 12 million?

Fucker if I had even one million dollars I wouldn't need more.

$12 million on the spot because of the concept of time value of money

You don't get millions of dollars by 'saving'

That's how we know you're full of shit.

>6 a day
kek
i sometimes shoot liek 3 an hour
so option 2 for me

Sure ya do champ

to get 12 million fapping at $100.00 a pop you would need to beat it 120,000 times. even at 2 times a day every day that is 164 years. that is one hell of a job

This is exactly what I thought too. I would waste the twelve million in a couple of years and would propably die on a cocain overdose.

Fucking casual

12m, if you fap just once a day, you won't break even until your over 90.

>Only an idiot would chose #2
>assumptions
If I masturbate twice a day, for 365 days
that's 73000 a year
>only twice a day
as you've said, this is Sup Forums
I once masturbated to ascii just to see if I could. If you get real deviant with it, you can beat your meat up to a dozen times a day without too much effort
that's over 400k a year
it only takes 30 years to make 12 million
If you're smart and investing that whole time, you're making only a little less than you would make after investing the 12 million for those 30 years with the potential to make even more because you can keep adding to your fortune after 30 years, at which point you'll be less 30 years behind the 12 million with respect to return on investment. In the next 30 years, you'll have surpassed them by miles. So, how often can you beat your meat is the question.

What if you upload your brain into a robot body in 2045 and live for another 10,000 years? You'd be kicking yourself.

i wank 32 times a day
so I'll take the 100/orgasm

$1m isn't enough to live off of forever. at 1% apy (which is already pretty high), you'll be making $10k/year in interest

if you spend, say, $250k on a house in bumfuck nowhere (even $250k is low, but let's pretend), and put the rest in the bank ,you'll be getting $7500 a year from interest, which is $625 a month. between food, car payments, entertainment, etc, you'll run out of money fast. sure you can invest the money and probably get greater returns, but it's harder to spend that money without divesting

You just have no idea how the money or the world in general works. You'll never get it but here's a start
>present value

yeah, also there would be nothing left of your dick after year one
it was a joke, buddy
I didn't even calculate the roi on the 12mil

If it were for both me and my girl we would make a couple stacks every night

12 million, invest a portion of it, leave rest in bank to generate a passive income off the interest, buy a really nice house, car, and build a music studio with it.
I'll be content with life

Yeah, you'll blow the $7,500 fast, but what about the $750,000? You could spend $18,750/year for 40 years before it would run out.

You could live on it and never work.

I'm assuming I'm not going to orgasm > 120,000 times so
>$12Mil

do robots orgasm?

got ya

#1. Imagine orgasms becoming a job if you got $100 a piece. You'd wank yourself to death trying to get rich.

> what do you earn your money with?
> well, I work a lot with my hands

of course you can, even if you need $300 for food and stuff a month, you have enough for necessities. But why live off the interest only if you can just use the money itself.

Yeah. There's a button wired to your flesh brain that gives you an orgasm at the push of a button.

At an orgasm a day, it would take 329 years to break even, so $12 million.

What if you stop orgasming

Fuck off you butthurt soyboi faggit
You sound stupid af brah

Why get rich if you can just get what you need, Imagine being in the checkout line and you need $200 dollars. 'Need any help there, user?'

12 million. Why the fuck would I want a life-long orgasm? I wouldn't be able to live my life. I'm glad having orgasms when I masturbate or when I'm fucking with 12 million in the bank.

Why didn't you have it a or b?

Anyways, I choose 1. I get 12 million, and you never said I couldn't orgasm, so I can still jack off a ton on my albino tiger skin rug and have my maids lick it clean.

>living on $19k a year comfortably
again, it depends where you choose to live. i rather have to work and be able to supplement my income than live in a trailer park and not need a job. you can't live anywhere reasonable for $19k a year unless you rent an apartment or some shit

>$300 a month on food and stuff
yeah sure, if you only wanna eat chicken and rice and never go out to eat

>the year is 12,018
>be a robot
>have orgasm button, All the other robots orgasm when they feel like it, but you... every time you orgasm a piece of paper appears. Your programming dictates that you must clean your environment.
>the garbage says "One Hundred Dollar Note"
>the dollar as a currency ended in the great cyborg war of 2079.

RIP

>Nowadays people barely even want to retire with less than $7M

Top kek. the median net worth for a family of nigs is like 4,900

stateofworkingamerica.org/fact-sheets/african-americans/

Not the person you were replying to, but here's an FYI:
Assuming a 2.4% discount rate, you would need to fap 32 times per day in order to have a larger estimated NPV from $100/wank instead of the initial $12M captial.

Assuming that you invest that $12M returning 4 basis points above inflation YoY, and assuming that you draw a $200k inflation-adjusted salary from it, you would need to wank almost 560 times per day in order to have a higher NPV over the 75 years of compounding that I assumed over a lifespan.

tl;dr - you might start in /s/, but you're going to end up in /d/ if you try this at home.

number 2 sounds dumb as fuck but is much more future proof in case of horrible events ruining the economy
seen as i can cum like 5 times a day without effort and i don't know that money will be safe for the forseeable future i take 2

Where I live $300 is enough groceries for a family of 3 for a month, you know the kind you need to some cooking for.

I am almost 34. If I was 13 again I would recommend the $100 per orgasm and not the $12m. A young kid would fuck up and lose all of their money so its better to have a steady stream of income starting a very young age vs at an older age.

If I took the $100 per orgasm option at age 13 I would have say.. $2m in jerk off earnings.

Now if I jerk off 3 times a day, for the next 25 years, I can expect less than 3 million in earnings.
I am older and wiser now and will go with the $12m. If I picked this at 18 I would have probably spent it all on bullshit and would be broke by now and not make any money jerking off. Plus if you get married, your wife will spend it all and then divorce you and take what is left over. That bitch. I actually know guys who made millions of dollars in post tax dollars in Silicon Valley in their late 20s only to be wiped out and force to go back to work in their mid 30s. A lump sum of money carries a shit ton of risks with it. You become a target to people. YOu have to manage it properly. As where $300-$500 per day will let you effectively retire and live wherever you want.


$100 per orgasm is not enough when you think about it. IF you jerk off 5 times a day, every day, $500 per day. You will have to jerk off for 24000 days to get $12m. That is 65 years of jerking off.

I would say raise. $15m right now. Or $1000 per orgasm.

This. I join these threads to post this exact post.

To be in the top 1% of wealth holders in America you just need more than $5m in assets. $12m likely puts you in the top 0.1%. Very few people have that kind of money. You can retire with less than $1m if you choose to leave the country and live in a place with a drastically cheaper cost of living. Go to Argentina or something where your cost of living will be $1000 per month and $1m will get you by just fine.

Option 1, at $100 a piece even if I jacked off 5 times a day I'd probably be dead before I got to $12 million

>fapping 3 times a day for 100 years just to match the 12 mil
I'll take the 12 million please

I'd beat my dick like it owed me money, which it would.

Also. You don't necessarily want to be a millionaire. You simply want to live like one. Money does have diminishing returns after a certain point.

The reality is that at $300 per day not working you can live just about wherever you want and have a lifestyle that enables you to do whatever you want. You won't be on people's radar like having $12m will.

Its much easier to not fuck up with a small stream of money (that still makes your income more than most working people). Than it is to simply go out and have a shit ton of money and lose it.

Masturbating once a day for a year gives you instant annual income comparable to minimum wage in the US and increases exponentially if done more than once daily. More or less very comfortable living if you already have a job or welfare. With the 12 million you can easily get severely fucked, if a tax audit ever comes your way you'll lose half of it.

>Option 2 please
I can get away from Uncle Sam's dogs easier and honestly don't even need to work any more but I will because it gives me an out for why I even have income at all. Most faggots in here are gonna choose the 12 million and poorly invest the cash or blow much of it on retarded shit anyway. Meanwhile I can always milk myself for more cash and never run out of money. If I get too old to fap, I'll just pop a viagra and do prostate stimulation lmao.

Eventually you will get some sort of electrode thing going on that goes up the ass and gives you 10 orgasms within the span of an hour.

Dudes will find ways to hack this.

>increases exponentially
unless you're investing it, no it doesn't. fucking retard

That's also a good point.

Even if it's placed into an account it's still gonna gain interest. This guy's post is stupid and assumes anons are gonna stuff their mattresses or some shit. There will be a steady increase. I'll take the safe route thanks, these fags can enjoy explaining a spontaneous 12 million to the government or whatever assets they purchase with it.

The whole upside with $12m is that you can do whatever you want for the rest of your life IF you are careful with it.

$300-$400 per day and you can do the same thing and not worry about losing it to bad decisions.

Since it would take you 109 years to make 12 mil cumming 3 times a day...

this is stupid.

if you're going for #2 how are you going to explain living off no income to the IRS?

>cocain overdose
you say that like its a bad thing

>Pick option 2
>Get erectile dysfunction
>Forever a poor

>Pick option 1
>Get erectile dysfunction
>Can afford a newer better penis

Cumming 3 times a day would still afford you just about any lifestyle you want. $110k per year not working. You can move wherever you want and do whatever you want. If your goal is to have a car collection or own a few mansions if won't work for that but just about anything else and you are cool.

Move to Tahiti, go surfing, jerk off, do whatever.

>these fags can enjoy explaining a spontaneous 12 million to the government or whatever assets they purchase with it.
who's giving you the money to begin with? how is someone gonna know when you jerk off so they can deposit $100 into your bank? you're picking and choosing where reality starts and ends

you can blow through $6m and still have more than the jerkoff guys will make in 40 years of forcing themselves to jerk off 3 times/day ($6m with interest over 40 years is $9m, $100*3*365*40 is $4.4m)

No brainier, 12mil.
If I want an orgasm just give me 15mins and a picture of ops mother.

That and could you imagine how you would look with permanent orgasm face.

At 10 orgasms per day thats 33 years to reach 12 million

Challenge accepted.

Since they don't seem mutually exclusive I'd go with the 12 million and afterwards enjoy my wanking as usual, albeit without the monetary bonus.

Option 1 - Feds immediately investigate you. You have to hire an attorney. They seize your shit.

or
>i won it gambling, pay the taxes, still have ~$5m leftover

Uncle Sam would tax you on your daily wank tips too.

Also. How do you get paid. Do you get cash? Is it credited to an account? $12m in cash would be a far bigger hassle than its worth. Take it to a bank and you get on a bunch of lists. Keep it around as cash and risk something happening to it.

As where cumming and then on your belly is a fresh $100 is much safer. It can't be seized. If you have to flee for whatever reason you take your money maker with you as where fleeing with $12m in cash is going to be a problem.

How could you all fall for such a retarded bait thread...

So you leave the United States. Go to some place where they won't bring it up that you have cash.

5 orgasms per day for 27 years for 5 mil.

Even easier.

while you jerk off 5 times a day, ill be living off my interest

>another person applying reality when it suits them

The casino would have to account that they showed you winning the money. All large wins and losses have to be accounted for.

Which casino paid you $12m?

Lol do you even gave a passport?
The foreign country would want verifiable income to allow you to move there.
>Yes customs lady I cum 100 dollar bills, I won't be a burden to your society.

Already explained this.

Not picking and choosing, this is after the fact. Money in hand. Explain how it got there, then try and explain why they shouldn't take taxes from it.

You get a tourist visa and pay the fee. They don't give a fuck what you do at that point. You don't immigrate like some retard.

That's not reliably traceable, there's no reason for anyone to assume it didn't come from working a little overtime at work.

you can gamble outside of casinos, and you can offer to pay the taxes

No you can't. Its highly illegal in the US. You would have to think of some other way to clean the money.