>be me born in 94 >was a shy kid growing up, but had a great childhood >stay home mom. business dad >growing up, I always found myself fascinated with science, talking to adults, questioning everything >in retrospect, I think I may have been gifted, but who knows >I was also considered good looking by others, but I had a very shy personality >anyways elementary school I was very popular >then I realized as we get older we distant ourselves from friends >best friend never invited me to his departing birthday party before middle school >middle school comes around, I also got to be really popular there >but when it came to girls I was a total prude and insecure about it >time where everyone gets braces >find out I have a genetic disorder for some missing teeth >confidence is down >fastfoward to high school >I'm missing teeth, plan to get implants in future >high school I was a lot more shy >no longer as popular, but still made friends >no self esteem due to teeth >get into a almost fatal car accident, go yolo mode >start smoking a lot of weed >get a dental bridge put in, find out I don't have enough space for implants, basically braces were a waste >apply to colleges, don't know what I want to be >accepted into a very prestigious engineering school >also landed a qt gf over summer >decided to make it a relationship as I heard engineering school is mostly guys >found out that I'm not so smart after all, and the senioriitis at school didn't pay off >had to play catch up on the weed out classes >school stress and copious drinking made me break out terribly with cystic acne >cont
>I used to remember being so active, climbing trees, traveling the woods >so many fond memories hanging out with friends >
>dealt with stress and acne by lifting hardcore >get gains >freshman year was still really fun despite me doing pretty bad in school >gf was always visiting me, loved me a lot. I t was puppy love >then freshman year ends, I go on vacation to cancun >find out my gf slept with another guy during vacation >I was really hurt but still loved her so I kept dating her >she breaks it off with me anyways to to visit the guy in a different city and sleep with him >find out he played her, he had a gf >she begged for me back >like a cuck I took her back but I was resentful >she was also transferring to a college closer to me so I thought we could see eacother mroe >sophomore year comes around > meet a Roomate who's a genius >inspired me to do better at my studies in engineering >focus hard on school, while gf is getting typical college life >she's partying it away, taking Molly, going to raves >find out she's talking to a dj at school >she sleeps with him and asks me to have an open relationship >I still wanted sex, and was so focused on school so I said ok >december comes and I bring my gf home >my dogs sick, but trying to play >I refuse, wanted to hang with gf >dog eventually keeps getting sicker >was told this was going on during college >he was going to my room where it was vacant >the stress probably got to him >take him to vet after he has horrible seizure >find out he has cancer >put him down, first time I bawled my eyes out >hang out with bros instead of gf >gf gets mad and cheats on me and bluebells me for about a month >rocky relationship from here >I go on accutane 80 mg, a hardcore acne drug >lots of side effects, but acne free >can cause a lot of bad shit, lower serotonin, cause depression, etc
Grayson Evans
What would Jesus do. And b4 Christfag
Henry Watson
seems like ur pretty good looking
show cock b4 die
Angel Lee
wow youre fucking gf dumped you and youre dog died life is over >op is a faggot
Wyatt Cooper
post her nudes before you kick the bucket OP
Jackson Young
I'm not good read that shit, but good luck, I hope you can follow through
Getting resuscitated is the biggest regret of my life and I wouldn't wish it on anyone
Tyler Bailey
>despite this I try very hard in school, get grades up >couldn't land first internship, get depressed and smoke a lot of pot >ended up getting one later anyways but a short one >kept my head up forcing myself to continuing engineering school despite hating it and having no passion >only liked design, and had a talent for it >end of sophomore year >things pretty good, patched up things with gf >then I find out she slept with my friend >last straw I break up >basically summer full of sex, but nothing else with her >she begs for me back >finally decide to forgive her >find out that same day she went on a date with a huge douche at a bar >he leaves me for him, they go to raves >im in the dust again, this time really bitter >decide to ignore her for real and man up >focus all energy on school, while seeing her at the gym, and her bf at bars >was hard but w/e focus on education get a good career right? >then my best friend dies from a drug over dose >this hit me pretty bad >still focus hard on school, internship rounds were coming >get placed in better internship >jr year comes >try my hardest >do well in school and get placed in my dream internship, and top tier >even get a part time offer >continue through senior year things are looking very great >basically strung along at the company, and thought I was going to get offered a job >naive me didn't apply to other jobs >budget cuts, I didn't make the cut >basically all the hardworking and stellar gpa I got for nothing >lost my dream career I worked so hard for >decide to do a lot of drugs and party >try coke, Xanax, nitrous, lsd, Roxy >fastfoward to now >been unemployed for 8 months >have a 3.8 gpa in engineering, stellar projects, fortune 500 internships >good communication skills >can't get a job because I always got fucked over >also for this niche field I wanted to get into is very hard to get in >losing hope, get depressed >go on SSRI >get into another bad car accident chronic pain >get hooked on Roxy
Lucas Hall
everbody walk the dinosaur im fucking calling it
Oliver Hernandez
Im still reading, but at this point I couldn't blame you for killing yourself.
Blake Richardson
>anyways my ex has been messaging me during senior year where things were looking VERY good for me >she was def a gold digger >this made me happy secretly , but I Never wanted her back >moved on by sleeping with a lot of other women because I gained actual confidence >the corporate experience and my "talent" that was stated by higher ups got to my head >I was working in my dream company and dream field >yet in the end it didn't matter >dreams came crashing down >drug abuse probably caused some shifts in my already fucked up brain chemistry >don't have the energy or willpower to apply to more jobs >just feel so hopeless >wish I just put that effort into something like medicine my REAL passion not engineering >but I'm afraid to take the leap, what if I don't make it just like how I failed now? >also worried how drug use may have affected my cognitive ability >filled with regret and remorse over my stupid decisions >can't see anything hopeful in the future, I end up losing everything at the end. >whether it be the friends I try so hard to keep, the lovers I try so hard to keep, the career I try so hard to keep >how in the world can I become a surgeon if I can't even get a job in engineering after all this? >I could settle for an engineering job in a low tier place, but I feel like I would be selling my self short for the work I did >also withdrawing so its not helping >then it hit me >im a junkie now and a good for nothing >im in a lot of debt >all my peers and friends and family that were so proud of me are always asking me what I'm doing >they ask me why I didn't get a job there etc >I can't even have the energy to go see my tinder dates or spit game >don't go out with friends >just watch anime >realize I'm getting more and more depersonalized >I decided its too late for me to come back >now my moms very sick >this is the last straw, I might lose my mom after all this bullshit >decide to take my life before experiencing more heartbreak
Oliver Stewart
I'll fight for you bro
Daniel Scott
>right now I took a lot of pills >sorry if I co uldnt even do a good green text >sorry to my friends >sorry to my dog, snickers. I wish I stayed with you instead of my cheating gf >sorry to my mom >sorry to my dad and sister >sorry to my best friend I wish drugs didn't kill you bro. ill meet you with the same fate
thanks Sup Forums. you were the only thing keeping me going when iw as down. when I lost my loved ones and was getting cheated on. when I was getting raped by school but trying to push through it
I guess the American dream doesn't exist. lives not like anime and hard work doesn't always pay off.
I'm sorry I'm weak. but at this point, I just don't know what to do. I feel so hopeless because I hate engineering now and even more after my horrible internship experience
I wish to do medicine but I'm scared of failing that too and probably won't make it cause my cognitive decline
I lost all my gains in lifting too...
I wish I dint work so hard for nothing.. goodbye Sup Forums... please remember me.
my names don. thanks you all
Elijah Mitchell
Shit happens your story is like the lowest tier of bad. Probably 75% of the world has a worse story than you. Suck it up and keep moving forward
Isaiah Smith
kys
Nathaniel Perez
man reading this shit really hurts. even anons don't have my back. I'm so much better off dead. I'm signing off. I swallowed the rest of my pills,
Carter Nelson
first time legitimately on this board and HOLY SHIT everyone here is fucking autistic. are y'all used to seeing people kill themselves on here?
>show cock b4 die faggot
>post her nudes before you kick the bucket OP are kidding me
at least there's and
Henry Fisher
Puke em up, faggot, it's not time yet
Owen Rivera
dont you mean LOGGING off
Leo Bailey
don't give up
Jackson Nguyen
I know it's all memes and jokes here but everyone has a story and even if it's cheesy it's yours. Probably won't change your mind but I hope whatever you find out there is better than what's here. Be at peace, user.
Jackson Ramirez
Dude, it sounds like you’re really doing it.
If so, know that you weren’t alone. You did what you did, life is just that. It’s shitty decisions, it’s laughing, crying, anger, love.
One moment it’s there and the other it’s gone.
If you still feel like staying with us. Do.
Nathan Martinez
Don't take those posts seriously, I don't think it's a very good idea to commit suicide, OP. I believe life is too precious to waste, and it's not like your life is a "living hell."
Luke Miller
...
Jayden Gray
Dont do it man trust me things get better
Isaiah Bennett
>Tue Don't do it!
William Cooper
I'll remember you OP. I'm sorry you don't want to stay with the rest of us anymore
ignore the autists telling you to kill yourself because muh anime internet hate machine edge. have a nap, talk to you when you wake up nigga
Angel Garcia
OP i feel exactly how you feel. drugs fucked me up, girls fucked me over, and now my moms cancer is back again. but look man, your gunna die someday anyways, why not just live life trying to improve the lives of others around you? Maybe you cant be happy, but you can be a provider and make another living soul happy. i mean, worst case, why not just do literally whatevee the fuck you want, and if you fail, so what you were gunna kill urself anyways so what did u lose? Look man just dont kill yourself. I feel like i see myself in you, and now isnt the time man you gotta keep going until the universe tells you its really time. its not time yet, trust me. i love you
Nathan Harris
>the stress probably got to him >him is a dog
Samuel Fisher
>I took a lot of pills >mfw this doesn't work 90% of the time buy a gun, moron
Dylan Evans
>sorry to my dog, snickers kill whoever named the dog too
Joseph Hill
please don't induce vomiting or call emergency services In the end its your choice what you want to do though bye then
Joshua James
>Sup Forums. you were the only thing keeping me going >Sup Forums
Leo Fisher
people actually read this shit?
Elijah Butler
>I guess the American dream doesn't exist trite, cliched
Brody Stewart
end it, fag
Jaxon Cooper
ignore the feminized newfags
Austin Lopez
I may be too late but if you're reading this, call 911 and get your stomach pumped. There's still hope for you, it's not worth it.
Grayson Young
have no sympathy for this kind of pathetic shit. its really a close-minded and a dumb choice to make. how tf do people think like that? i wont even bother going in detail. all ill say is that people change. just find something small in your power that you can change for the better (often, this comes intuitively and without thinking) and just keep going in that direction.
hope you come to your senses and puke
Matthew Richardson
this
Leo Ross
You cant understand it unless youve felt it. just like you get the inclination to think that noone could ever think like that. its not a choice you make. its literally the way your brain works, or doesnt work. you feel so depressed and life seems so worthless that death is the only way to cure it. severe depression, feels like lifting a viel of happiness, and it allows you to see that happiness was an illusion the whole time, and now in your deppression you see everything for how it REALLY is. which looks like absolute horror. imagine adopting a dog, and then falling in absolute complete total love with it, and then watching someone slowly slaughter it while its still alive right in front of you. now, imagine going through that feeling every single day of your life. horror, right? Thats depression for ya.
David Williams
let OP go, we don't need his faggotry in the gene pool
Michael Reed
>imagine adopting a dog, and then falling in absolute complete total love with it, and then watching someone slowly slaughter it while its still alive right in front of you lol wat
Lincoln Lee
>Been here since 2010 >Used to Lol at this shit
Then, two weeks ago my dad killed himself, shits fucking me up man, I can only imagine how the people around you will feel
Brody Bailey
Jsssksskkssksjshdjdhdhdbdhsjsks
Brayden Jackson
gud point
Mason Hernandez
Don’t want to be a moral fag but… I know where you are, I tried to kill my self in the same way. Life sucks and its going to get worse before it gets any better but there is always hope.
Jayden Miller
Will you livestream it for us? For science? its the least you could do
Adrian Ross
this men die in a hail of gunfire escaping from the cordon around their 5th bank robbery women swallow pills then attention whore on the internet tits or gtfo, OP
Adam Bell
i have this strange feeling that op will not deliver
Liam James
bullshit, post a pic
Brody Roberts
Travel well and goodbye my friend.
Asher Lopez
literally how your brain works? fuck yeah literally how your brain works. its all in our heads. the whole fucking world (the perception - the part that matters to us) is in our heads. you can change your way of thinking and you can change your stances on things. meaning you change your perception on reality and thus change yourself and how you feel about reality.
also i get the other aspect of How your brain works. meaning, our neurons and neurotransmitters and diagnosed depressions, anxieties, schizophrenias, depersonalizations and derealizations caused by inbalance of hormones, lots of other shit. you can change this (if not that - then slightly alter it) by going head to head with the problem. meaning, identifying the problem, looking for causes and cures. in this day and age, you can always make it better, even if its just a little by little.
Easton Reyes
...
Zachary Myers
the faggot live4chaned his suicide, he's going to hell
Noah Russell
Hope you're still out there OP.
I nearly did the same a few years ago, things can get better solong as you keep on living. Your current situtation isn't permanent.
On the whole brain thing, it might be messed up at the moment but brains are plastic, you're only young too, it can be changed
Robert Carter
Peace out, user
Aiden Moore
Dude.
Are you serious?
Either you are omitting a ton of shit or this is gay fake.
Levi Jenkins
fucking retards. I have no sympathy for you fags and hope you die. depression and mental illness isn't a meme. its a serous shit. especially with drug abuse.
I went to rehab for this shit. your brain chemistry gets all sorts of fucked up.
I had friends kill themselves over their mental illness. schizophrenia depression you name it. its not just a bad day, its feeling apathetic about everything. nothings fun. that video game you used to love? feels dead. etc
>don't go out with friends >just watch anime >realize I'm getting more and more depersonalized >I decided its too late for me to come back
Moral of the story: don't do anime. That shit will fuck you up.
Brayden Jenkins
call 911 now, you can get through this. just do it
Dominic Ward
i just dont get it how some can live on this planet for 2+ decades and yet not find a single thing/hobby that amuses them to a point where they would rather do that fun thing instead of being dead.
sure interests change, hobbies die off. but you just need to keep changing and finding new things; grow, evolve as a person. thats life
Jaxson Phillips
I've seen a lot of faggots in my life and particulary on this board, but YOU OP, are the faggest faggot I'll ever seen in all my life, I already smell semen from your mouth even tho I'm behind my computer.
Brandon Evans
His story sounds almost exactly like mine, except I'm in Canada.
Did everything right, graduate without a job lined up, have a mental breakdown and now it's 2 years and I can't find work in my niche field.
I thought it was my country causing the problem but I guess it's just me.
I'm not going to kill myself though, I'm going to try to start a startup, fail at it, start another one, and keep doing this until I either make it, get hired, or die.
Carson Young
why is she not playing Skyrim?
Easton Campbell
im not saying its a meme. its not a meme. it is serious shit. but not seruous enough to make you give up on life
Kevin Richardson
Dude, become a hobo or a biker and leave that old life behind. Also, pills will only give you liver damage
James Sanders
>misspelling the word dependent while nitpicking someone else's grammar
Evan Turner
Man, poor OP. Hope the pills didn't work or whatever.
Grayson Parker
>His story sounds almost exactly like mine, except I'm in Canada >Canada ouch, kys too user
Aaron Walker
live stream it!!!!! i wanna watch
Kayden Thompson
>cunflating spelling with grammar
Luke Scott
for example: lets say you have diagnosed depression. how are you going to kill yourself if you didnt do everything there can possibly be done about it? maybe its a hormonal disbalance, go check that, maybe its your weed smoking, maybe you need to smoke weed, maybe you need to get out more, get out less, find love, if you already found it - find it again, a new one, maybe your hobbies dont spark you anymore so finding new hobbies becomes a task that takes a life of a time, maybe you need to move out & live alone or maybe you need to move in with your friends, maybe you need to make money in order to buy most random shit ever and fulfill most random needs or maybe you need to give away money because you feel that helping others makes you feel better
know yourself, change
Alexander Jackson
Godspeed user
Jayden Parker
Stay with us OP. mental illness isn't forever, there are solutions and things can change. Don't leave us. Don't leave your mother when she's sick, she needs you. Please call 911.
Thomas Baker
OP is gone, guys. Whether or not he actually went an hero, we'll likely never know.
Noah Russell
...
Brody Nelson
A man can always hope
Brody Turner
It's fucking fake and gay. Check comment of music vid shared by OP.
Noah Perez
if you really do do it can you max out your credit first and buy some crypto for us before you off yourself. t. /biz/
Benjamin Clark
Someone else could have chosen this song for their suicide, you fucking idiot.
Connor Collins
Wake up user
Cooper Clark
Hey op. I had a story similar to yours. Fucked teeth too. Was hooked on fentanyl. All that's behind me and life is good. I wad homeless with no friends and crawled out. It can be done if you want.
Juan Carter
Id wish i was as Brave as you, but i wish even more that ppl like you and me get to be happy sometime.
Luis Nelson
Reading stories like this makes me feel like its necessary for kids to get a shitty childhood. I had no mother around, father worked several jobs, lost all my friends several times, can't afford to go to college, have medical issues, and hate women so I cannot find myself getting close to them. Comparatively you have it much better than like 60% of Americans.
Isaiah Anderson
KEK!
Oliver Moore
lul wut did he expect? i'll finish it off with this fine quote >You have COMPLETELY misunderstood the idea of Sup Forums. Sup Forums is not "hey guys take a look at this funny link ha ha." Sup Forums is not Facebook's whiteknighting. Sup Forums is not Reddit, Tumblr or 9gag.com. Sup Forums is a place for people to be monsters. Disturbing, cold, heedless monsters that they really are. Tsunami kills people in Asia and we laugh. Psychotic emo fulfills her sick desires with her cat and we laugh. A man rapes his grandchildren, we laugh and demand more. Suicide, foul play, genocide- we laugh. Racism, sexism, discrimination, xenophobia, rape and unfounded wrath- we laugh.
>We are cruel; we do not forgive; we do not forget; we are the real face of the internet.
Thomas Martinez
t. OP
Matthew Howard
That was beautiful
Lincoln Fisher
kek, I knew this was b8, no one is this gay.
Connor Murphy
>now my moms very sick You selfish shit if your mom is sick the last thing she needs right now is dealing with your suicide. If you want to kill yourself at least wait until after she's dead.
Nolan Bell
You will actually write your suicide letter in greentext you madman make sure to include something about the honour of the samurai and gut yourself afterwards