Looking for a way to kill myself that involves something that will not be perceived as suicide...

Looking for a way to kill myself that involves something that will not be perceived as suicide, so like cancer or something similar, anyone have any suggestions / interesting ideas?

Other urls found in this thread:

store.steampowered.com/app/346010/Besiege
articles.chicagotribune.com/2004-07-04/features/0407040312_1_commuter-locomotive-train-car
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

nuke your dick in a mod microwave my nigga

Eat yourself to death. Obesity-caused illnesses are the leading cause of death in the United States, nobody will suspect a thing

Here's something easy that will be unquestionable.

>Get a plane ticket to vegas
>fly to vegas
>buy a gun
>take gun to hotel room, go to casino and withdraw 30k from the ATM
>transfer to chips
>bet it all on a single table
>loose it all, slam fists on table, and run away crying
>go back to hotel room and shoot yourself
>dont leave a note, just do it.


If you manage to win money on that 30k, count your good luck and go home.

Unrealistic to my situation

Just over eat until you die.

Noose of piano wire, super glue hands to head and jump when leaving chair. Should look like you ripped your own head off if there's enough force to sever your spine.

Looking for serious answers

Get a couple of bottles of Round Up and spray a fine mist over your bed and clothing. You will develop a life ending cell mutation extremely quickly.

Contract Aids

Buy a car radio or something
Choose a cold day to install it
So cold you choose to do it in the garage
So cold you start the car and turn on the heater
Engine purrs you to sleep

Oh shit got a good one. If you time your living space to catch fire while u incapacitate yourself with a helium exit bag would wipe the evidence of your peaceful departure

join a street gang, work your way up by selling drugs and jumping rival gang members to build up 'beef'

after a few years of hanging out on street corners and stoops and 'stacking beef' you will get served that 'beef' in a drive-by that makes Arby's look like some lunchables ish

+ your mom gets to run out into the street crying bout 'mah baby'

no one will suspect a thing

Get drunk and drive into a river.

Kill yourself with a firearm and elaborately set it up so it looks like someone you hate murdered you in cold blood

Attend an American education centre.

...

Yeah, but how? Tie a parachute to the gun and hope it flyes away?

Eat some Tide pods. People will just think you're retarded instead of thinking that you're a pathetic faggot.

higher quality version

hmm, well if you use a dozen or so helium balloons that might work, make sure to somehow not leave fingerprints on the gun.

you can buy samples of radioactive metals on ebay or science stores. Just eat the shit and you'll get cancer.

Eat a tiny bit of cyanide every day and leave behind diaries that say you think your neighbour is trying to kill you.

Put lead on your drinks. Smoke, or don't smoke by hang out with smokers. Once a month dress up with an unitard and put a black bag on your head, then run without looking out of your house into the street.

kek.

Get your hair stuck in a hotub pump. Just let it suck in. Or if you're balding insert something else. Another option is autoerotic asphyxiation while on Xanax. Think about it. No one is going to claim you purposely killed yourself with a plug up your ass and your cock out.

a fuckton of helium ballons tied to the gun. that is brilliant.

you'll end up gaining an immunity to cyanide

If you don't care about the condition of your corpse 90 MPH into an oak tree will do it. Bonus thinking ahead points if you replace the fuse for your SRS (supplemental restrain system, that is to say airbag) with a blown fuse so it won't deploy and increase your chances of survival. Do NOT just remove the fuse, that makes it appear to be suicide.

If you really wanted to kill yourself and it not be percieved as suici... why the fuck do you care? You'd be dead.

Not that you should do it, whatever shitty reason you have, it's not worth it.

but plenty of people try to cover up the fact that their kid was strangling themselves while jerking and accidentally killed themselves by saying it was just suicide.

k gonna do this

see you on the other side

>withdraw 30k from the ATM
$300 limit

Serious question, what is the game in gif related? I've been wondering about it for years

I mean don't in all seriousness, I don't know you but all human life is worth it. Though if you legitimately can't keep fighting "accidentally" make chlorine gas as an amateur cleaning solution. Bleach + Ammonia, but hey. Like please don't though man, it's not worth it. Just keep fighting my Sup Forumsro

this

besiege

>why the fuck do you care?

Probably has an insurance policy for the family.

...

Its called Besige. Its a pretty cool Game. Heres the steam link: store.steampowered.com/app/346010/Besiege

Even so, suicide, for whatever reason, isn't the answer. Imagine, let's say, if OP had a family with kids and they killed themselves.... how fucked up would their kids be?

Besieged

>I don't know you but all human life is worth it.

No it's not. STFU. Are you going to tell me the world is better off with the the gangbang rapist/murderer in cell F083 than without him? In most cases I'll agree that human life is worth it, but certainly not all.

*the the

Smoke a fuck ton of ciggarettes, fuck some shitty gheto hookers without protection, drink a lot and go for a drive in the highway at night.

Jump out of an airplane while riding on the back of a lion that is on fire.


Bring a hat.

and sunglasses

Suicide by cop.

Smoke till u get cancer

If you have a car, get fucking wasted on whatever heavy duty shit you have then drive as fast as you can, on a deserted stretch of road at 3 a.m., directly into the most solid object you can find.

HA! I went back and added it because I thought I forgot it, but somehow didn't see it was already there.

"Trip" in front of a train at a station.

But don't. even your life is probably worth saving.

that's a dickbag move, the guy driving the train probably wouldn't like that.

Still wanna kys Op? I've got the perfect way

Read and become depressed. The article is old, but the problem is still very much around: articles.chicagotribune.com/2004-07-04/features/0407040312_1_commuter-locomotive-train-car

start smoking filterless cigarettes

Get super duper drunk and accidentally fall into a river

I like the sound of the setting someone up for murder.. while using helium balloons.. imagine the defence in court.. no one in their right mind would believe it

Boom

fucking send it

Watch "Life of David Gale"

Complicated shit, but in sum, anti death penalty guy whose life is in ruins and dying friend make friend's suicide look like guy killed her. Guy is executed and later proven innocent.

They use helium bags.

go to a factory
find a big machine
jump in

I figured that attaching concrete block/cinder-block to ones legs and jumping into a river off of some bridge with it and drowning would probably be intuitively looked at as a murder.

Put on a peta shirt under a deer costume. Go hiking in it during hunting season. Being stupid doesnt count as suicide