I love my fiancee, but she has absolutely no sex drive anymore. It's not her fault, she's on a few necessary medications that have killed her libido, so if I'm lucky I get sex once a month. The problem is that she gets pissed off if I masturbate, but she won't touch me, and she refuses to go see a doctor to see if there's anything they can do to help rebalance her out.
So I've decided it's time to find a steady side piece, just someone I can go drain my balls in from time to time. Had one not too long ago but right after we started hooking up she got a steady boyfriend and called it off.
Anyone have any tips or advice for getting away with it?
Are you prepared to spend the rest of your life in this position?
Ryan Cook
Tell your spouse your masterbation isn’t her concern.
Jason Sanders
...
Brody Rogers
This confuses me because if you are too stupid to hide masturbation the you are definatlely too stupid to hide a "side piece". This leaves me to draw one of two conclusions.
1. You really are that stupid, you'll get caught and she'll leave you 2. You want to end it but your too pussy, you'll get caught and she'll leave you.
Either way ends the same and it sounds like a shit relationship anyway.
William Lewis
No tips on getting away with it, but some advice.
I have the EXACT same issue with my wife. We read some books when we first got married. Hers was called "created to be a help meet" and mine was called "created to need a help meet."
It has biblical principles but it explains how sex is a necessary item for a guy and that if you don't satisfy your man, someone else will. A calm conversation about that and maybe a trip to the DR might help.
Women don't understand that men need sex. They just don't click that way. Also, think on if you've changed at all. Are you not doing the sweet stuff she wants? Are you speaking each others love language?
Parker Lewis
damn
Ayden Turner
so...your solution is not to simply stand up to your fiance and tell her you'll just fap every now and then to get by...but to go behind her back and cheat.
lol she's gonna own half your shit 6 months after you get married and you're gonna sit there and take it like a bitch, just like you do now b/c you dont have the balls to stand up to her
Juan Miller
Let's turn the tables here: how do you know it's not her that's getting railed on the side by another dude? And that's the reason she's only 'in the modd' once a month and the meds are nothing but an excuse?
Easton Thompson
what a bunch of fucking betas....first off, who gives a fuck if she gets pissed off....second, it really isnt that hard to cover up a fap session...
Owen Ortiz
Clearly you're not married. It's alright youngin. You'll get there eventually.
Joshua Stewart
Why would you waste your time with someone who won't let you fap?
Joshua Diaz
>too childish to talk to her about how being able to masturbate is essential for your mental health >willing to ruin everything with a side chick you don't belong with her man, you're too pussy to stick to your guns and calmly explain that you need to be able to have some release. she's too stupid to understand how important sex is to men and you're too stupid to explain it, disaster waiting to happen. don't have kids together ffs.
Julian Gomez
Speaking from experience, I found out an ex-fiancee of mine was cheating on me 8 months after I've proposed to her (we were together for 4 years before that). She claimed it was the pill taking her libido... But she wasn't actually on it, and she was pregnant shortly before I smelled something fishy and called it off.
Ethan Cook
lol
I don't bother hiding my fapping and I flat out tell her "if you won't touch me, you aren't gonna stop me from touching myself." The issue is that it causes fights and that's what I'm tired of. Obviously, I WOULD hide a side piece.
I do everything and more. She tells me constantly that I'm wonderful and so sweet and that I treat her so well and that she's sorry that she just can't get in the mood for sex anymore.
Nope, pre-nup's already in place. The only shit we'd split in a divorce is anything we acquire after the marriage. Otherwise we keep what we had before the marriage. I'm not an idiot, no matter how badly your baby dick ego desperately wants to try and prove otherwise.
Joshua Reed
this is super important. you need to examine how you're both treating each other, explain your hidden agendas and analyze how each other shows and wants to receive love.
Sebastian Sullivan
34 and married with 3 kids....don't hate on me b/c im not too much of a pussy to let me wife rule over me
Jayden Garcia
34 and married with 3 kids....don't hate on me b/c im not too much of a pussy to let me wife rule over me
Kevin Gray
this...so much this
Sebastian Gonzalez
Her medication is for a medical issue that causes frequent seizures, so she's with me literally 24 hours a day. Work, home, etc. Believe me, she doesn't have the opportunity to cheat. She can't drive.
Me on the other hand, I occasionally have to leave the office or house for a couple hours to handle various errands, and it would be simple to stage an errand to cover up visiting a mistress.
Carson Price
Luckily, she doesn't have to always be in the mood. All she has to do is lay there. Or bend over, your choice really.
My wife doesn't rule over me user, if that's what you're implying. However, I know how to get the most out of my wife. Could I be the alpha chad type with her? Sure. But the sex is so much better when she's into it rather than just laying there. It's manipulation, for sure. But it's for mutual benefit if I treat her a certain way to get what I want.
Levi Bell
I'm in her position too, but i'm male.
I had to sit my partner down and explain that it's not his fault, the meds are fucking me up. Thankfully he understands. He jerks off which I don't mind at all. Once we went to bed, I wasn't feeling horny at all, and he was so he started jerking it, i rolled over and cuddled him. Seemed to help.
Thankfully, my partner is kind and understanding. He says sex isn't all there is to a relationship, but I still feel guilty. I found out which med was the culprit (antidepressants my doctor snuck on me when I was vulnerable and refused antidepressants, he told me they would help me sleep) and threw them away. I'm withdrawing kinda badly, but I want my sex drive back. I'm sick of having balls the size of oranges and a dick smaller than I had when I was a cub scout.
My advice is for you to either hide the fact that you jerk off, or sit her down and tell her the truth. Explain blue balls to her. Tell her how physically painful it is. Reinforce that you are not breaking trust boundaries by watching porn or whatever, and that you're a man with needs, and you still love her. If she truly loves you, she will understand, brother. If she loses her shit and gets upset, i'm sorry to say it.. but she's not right for you.
In any case, I hope you come to a resolution, and get this sorted out.
>inb4 fag
Juan Bennett
good for you man glad you found out she was a lying bitch in time. don't trust women.
David Edwards
Fucking five star post nigga.
pic unrelated.
Carson Price
I guess I should clarify:
I don't need tips on getting away with it. And seriously, to the virgins saying I'm bad or that I don't deserve her: you're on Sup Forums, don't pretend you aren't a piece of shit too.
No, I need tips on finding the side piece in the first place.
Daniel Richardson
How the fuck is she able to say she's sorry she can't do something for you, and then not let you deal with it yourself? I'm so glad I'm not monogamous.
Carson Nguyen
Fucking /thread idubbz is that you
Jack Bell
If you're a male, look into a supplement called "Boom stick" by Redcon1. It will increase your testosterone and sex drive. 3 pills, 3 times a day. Thank me later.
Samuel Adams
Don't be silly. I'm only on Sup Forums to enjoy how much of a moral highground I have over people like you
Jacob Lopez
...
Colton Reyes
I appreciate this insight very much. I do wish she was more understanding of my situation. Her aversion to porn is because an old ex would jerk off to it instead of fucking her, and she can't really get over it despite the fact that I very much would rather fuck her than masturbate. I've spent the last year talking to her regularly, trying to get her to open up a bit, see my side, maybe find solutions, but have had no luck. Which leads us to my original post.
Ain't nothing wrong with being gay, man, no matter what all these little 12 year old say. Do what makes you happy.
Lincoln Young
Will do. I really need a boost right now.
I haven't cum for a few months, and my partner and i haven't had sex since last year. This is why I refused antidepressants to begin with. They can seriously fuck people up. I'm just hoping the damage isn't permanent.
Wyatt Perry
like other anons stated if you're too dumb to hide masturbation you sure are too dumb to fake an affair.
Nathan Rodriguez
fag
Brayden Johnson
I highly doubt it. The human body is capable of some pretty impressive stuff. 30 days of no additives and clean eating and chemically the body should reset. Obviously check with a medical professional though.
My sex drive was meh for a while until I started Boom Stick. Once I did, I want it every night and it's huge loads.
>take pills >boost test >rock it like a porn stare >get/receive epic facial to make up for the last year . . . ....Profit!!!
Elijah James
Get rid of her.
You wouldn't buy a broken fridge, why would you buy a broken woman.
Zachary Smith
lol. Again: I've never tried to hide my masturbation. The issue is that it makes her angry that I do it in the first place.
Aiden Lee
She sounds insecure and controlling, bud. She doesn't like porn because an ex watched it and wouldn't fuck her, but it's cool for her to not fuck you?... Female logic is astounding.
She has it too good user. You sound like a good guy. Go find yourself a nice side piece. That's all there is left to do now.
(You)
I'm coming up on a week without the meds, and I can sorta get an erection, but not keep it. I'm eating decently. I do have to take painkillers for my back, but that's great, I used to get hard and last for the longest time before cumming.
I'll look into boom stick, you have my sincere thanks.
Dylan Murphy
Have you ever jacked off right in front of her? And when she gets mad about it tell here there's 2 options, either she does something or you do something. Either way, it needs to happen.
David Brooks
Break up with your girlfriend now before it's too late.
This shit isn't going to change because she has no interest in changing it. And she can't expect to not fuck up, not allow you to masturbate, and not allow you to fuck someone else. One of those things has to change.
I'd be honest and straight up tell her if she won't fuck you and won't go to a doctor to see if her shit can get fixed, then you're going to find someone who will fuck you, and it's up to her if she wants to remain with you while you fuck someone else. Or just break up with her and fuck someone else.
The only reason I could see staying in your relationship is say, you had kids together and didn't want to split up the family, or you rely on her for financial support, if the meds situation was short term and you could wait it out.
Otherwise, you're an adult in an adult relationship and that means sex is a general expectation unless otherwise discussed and agreed upon. (That's not to say she owes you sex whenever you want it... enthusiastic consent is important... but to deny you sex forever is bullshit.)
Gabriel Nelson
good that way you’ll avoid AIDS
fag
Hunter Cruz
*Not fuck you, I mean. Autocorrect is a bitch.
Grayson Bell
That fishy smell was him busting off in it
Jace Cox
We probably have sex once every four to six weeks. So it isn't that we NEVER have sex, but that isn't nearly as much as I want.
I mean, if I got sex whenever I wanted, it would be 2-3 times a day. I've always had an overactive libido. But I understand that that's unreasonable. I'd be content with 2-3 times a week. But once every 4-6 weeks?
We've had sex three times in 2018, which is more than the entire last half of 2017.
Brayden Sanchez
Well either way... the only time a partner should get upset about masturbation is if you're using up all your sexual energy on masturbating instead of fucking them (If they want sex and you're not giving it. ) So that's something she'll have to work on regardless.
Sexual incompatibilities are like the silent killer in relationships. People think it shouldn't be that big of a deal but it has far reaching consequences leading to feelings of decreased self worth, cheating, resentment, etc.
Ideally I think if she agreed to an open relationship, then you could be honest about what you're doing, it would give you a sexual outlet, and give her some relief from you wanting sex from her all the time. But if she doesn't even want you jacking it, I can't imagine she'd agree to that.
Christian King
It's been brought up as a "potential solution" but yeah, she isn't interested. I said it could be someone I occasionally see while sparing her details, or we could invite another girl into our bed and only be with her when we could share, but unsurprisingly everything was a hard no.
When we first started seeing each other three years ago things were different. When we only saw each other on weekends, we fucked 2-3 times each day. After she moved in, we fucked every day. But after they increased the dosage of her seizure medication, that's when everything pretty much ground to a halt.
Sebastian Robinson
> marriage > buy a woman wat
Jacob Parker
Listen, bitch, if you get mad at me for jerking off, this engagement is over.
Nicholas Long
FYI, prenups aren't worth shit. Some judges just completely ignore them. The woman can say she was under duress to sign it. Don't count on that saving your ass.
Luke Brown
Very similar positions to you two literally just got married yesterday, she was jealous and didn't like me jacking off at first, but she got over it after I did it anyways. she came around after a while (and lots of complaining) so that we don't end up having sex once every three weeks, we're going at it 2-3 times a week. Sometimes if i'm lucky twice in a day.
Luis Jackson
I'm totally cool with my partner jacking off though. He has needs, and he's explained he would prefer me first but won't force me.
Asher Rodriguez
I havent had sex with my gf since last april due to her anxiety disorder. You can skip the "shes secretly cuckin u jokes" cuz i know her disorder is legit, im her life preserver and shes stuck in the middle of the atlantic. I love her and i will marry her. But i also wanna fuck other people or at least suck some dick on the side. I never want her to know, and i know its wrong, but im 22 and its never gonna get any easier to get laid than it is now, especially if i get married.
Tyler Allen
I think it would be different if she would meet me on the middle and compromise, or at least try sometimes. But she just pushes me away and says "sorry."
Maybe that's selfish, I dunno. Feminists would accuse me of desire rape or something I'm sure.
Elijah Sullivan
and I've gone that approach with her too, started jackin' it next to her, she'll start her self up too, it's actually helped us go from a month (maybe) to a more normalized thing If I may, try going at it yourself next to him, even if it doesn't go anywhere it'll be fun for both of you
also try doing this OP, might help
Jayden Sanders
That sounds kinda similar to me, yeah. My fiancee is wonderful and amazing in every way except the sex.
Logan Barnes
No dude, there are guys that get married and they let their lady call the shots and they play the dumb hubby like in a sitcom or you go the other route of being the man in the relationship and your happiness is equal to or greater than hers..especially if you are the prime earner.
This whole happy wife makes for happy life is bs, not marrying a cunt makes for a happy life. Most men end up with cunts.
Owen Thompson
I've tried. She gets pissed off that I'm being "pushy" because she's already said she isn't in the mood.
Jason Adams
this post is so fuckin funny.... im a female and i completely understand cause im exactly the same.... in fact i have a higher sex drive than most the men i know ahaha
Christian Morris
I dunno then OP, you could be a dick and pull the girl card "I have wants needs and desires too" usually works and you might get what your looking for but she'll be damn pissed for sure
Connor Smith
this /thread
Sebastian Perez
>anxiety disorder.
So you went to the dealership and said, "I am looking for a broken ride that needs a lot of work and most likely will never run right..what do you got?"
And he pushed your gf out and you said. "Perfect"
lol..jesus wtf kid.
Henry Hernandez
Most women I've met, a solid 8/10, run their mouths about having a high sex drive but when it comes to go time, they prove they're full of shit.
If you do have this, good for you. If you're full of shit and you know it, kys.
Also, if this post offended you, you're full of shit.
Luis Lopez
Leave her. It wont get better. You will just keep wasting years of your life and you will find yourself too old to start over.
Lucas Lewis
>Implying people with anxiety don't deserve love
Andrew Sanchez
Just leave her user, she's not worth it Also, a womans sex drive doesn't magically stop, she's just getting it somewhere else
Austin King
>she loves you but hasn't fucked you in almost a year what a bitch even if she's not in the mood it's not hard to fucking lay there and take a dick. she's a bitch and you should dump her
Lucas Flores
tits or gtfo
Michael Carter
Now i'm interested. What's your ideal fuck frequency?
Nolan Brooks
She's fucking another person, and the guilt keeps her from wanting to fuck who she's with Women are emotional beings first and foremost
Sebastian Lopez
>never heard of libido inducing factors
Cooper Brooks
Nigga. Fiance??? Are u actually still considering this bitch lol
Christopher Ortiz
like, apparantly she loves you but she doesn't love you enough to have sex with you more then once a year? give me a fucking break. she's grossed out by you, you are like a friend or a little brother to her. maybe she needs your money or your emotional tampon support. i don't know.
but if she can't fucking lay there and put out now and again even when she's not in the mood. then she doesn't love you enough to make that basic sacrifice.
William Ortiz
read Does no one read beyond the original post before posting anymore?
Nathaniel Martinez
>she gets pissed off if I masturbate Dump the bitch. Her problem is not the meds, that's just an excuse. She is a prude. And she's controlling about it. This issue will never be resolved, end it now before you have to give her half your shit.
Brody Gutierrez
tldr, OP is cucked edition
Dominic Watson
/someone else I haven't, what are those?
Luke Collins
>magically tfw so derp modern pharmaceuticals are magic to you
Daniel Scott
You sleep
Christian Hill
>i cant grasp any abstract social concepts unless i picture them like buying something at a store, dyuhhhh
Kys
Elijah Jenkins
You sleep brah , also anti-seizure medications are synthetic dopamine That increases sex drive, not takes away from it, I know this for a fact
Gavin Carter
wow Satan and son dub trips
David Torres
If you love her don’t cheat
Tyler Collins
how hard is it to just lay there and take a dick for 5 minutes? she can't even do that much for you >she's not in the mood oh well, too fucking bad then
no gf of mine would deny me sex that long i would just dump her for being selfish and uncaring about my needs. there's no excuse
meds, social circumstances, environment etc can have an effect on your sex drive (libido)
Chase Martinez
Haha, you a legit fucking idiot.
Look up the word analogy. And take your meds.
James Phillips
>666 >333
David Perez
You guys apparently don't think anxiety disorders exist
Have you ever seen the episode of invader zim where zim wears a pair of goggles that allows him to see germs and it puts him in a constant state of distress? That is the best way to describe what my gf feels like 24/7. Once i spent 2 weeks driving her around for 8 to 10 hours a day just to help her stay calm.
Carter Robinson
>implying marriage isn't just extreme dating in the current year
>rest of your life
Aiden Butler
>Invader zim
Yeah, you fucking lost me. Learn how to speak to people without using manufactured or cartoon bullshit. You fucking adolescent.
Kayden Sanchez
Just going to get worse from here on out 1x a month now 1x a year soon 1x a decade... Dump ice queen Find hot cougar
Josiah Young
This fucking thread is pointless. Everyone thinks you're too stupid to keep a side chick so no one will tell you how. We all want you to leave her because it's useless, you won't. So quit wasting everyone's fucking time about asking for side chick tips. Everyone, quit wasting YOUR fucking time trying convince him of dumping her ass. I'm here to see a resolution.
Or are YOU and US going to stalemate like you and your gf?
Evan Diaz
Exactly, she is broken. She will slowly drain the life and any chance at happiness you had as HER issues take precedent and center stage over anything to do with you or your needs.
It is one thing to get cucked in the bedroom, it is another to get cucked out of a happy life.
Carson Garcia
90% chance she is masturbating dude. She ain't sleeping with you because she doesn't have to.
My advice is to stop buying her things, and observe her reaction.
Brandon Wood
>wont fuck her bf for almost a year there's anxiety and then there's being a bitch lay down, open your legs, in a few minutes it will all be over, supposed to be the man you love and you cant even let him stick it in, come on. i'm not saying she doesn't have anxiety. but i am saying she's a bitch
Ethan Ward
I'm going off of this shit,also, you can't take anti-seizure medications and anti-anxiety medications at the same time One effects dopamine and the other effects serotonin, taking both together would cancel both out. It's why you can't take zany and molly together and get high
>
Blake Mitchell
If you cheat, you have no honor. Period. Hate to tell you something you do not like. Once that ship sails, you have no right to judge thieving niggers, scheming Jews, or anyone else in this fucked up world. Once you throw that away, you are not a man - you are just an animal that humps things. And your dick will, without a doubt, get you in more trouble than you can imagine. Psycho botches, child support payments, and STDs brother. But the final cost will be shame at not being the man you could have been, and no amount of macho keyboard bullshit will change what you feel when you look in the mirror.
But you can keep your honor. Find a marriage counselor. Confess that you’ve thought about cheating. Read the five languages of love - and ask her to read it with you at the same time, then talk about it. There could be a happy family at the end of this. There could be an ending of this relationship. Have the courage to face the unknown. Maintain your honor, keep your head held high. Good luck.
Lucas Richardson
You see what would make her an amazing g/f would be that she met YOUR needs inspite of her issues. That you mattered so much she puts herself aside for a little bit to devote to you. She doesn't. Thus she is a self centered woes me cunt who will drain you the rest of your life and act like she is doing you a favor the entire time she is doing it.
Oliver Myers
This is the real question OP.
David Fisher
op is probably her best friend not her bf. she says he's her bf to hold on to him for the constant attention and for the emotional (and possibly financial) support. the social anxiety is real but she blows it out of proportion to make everything about her and as an excuse to keep her unattractive beta bfs benis out of her bagina.
check her phone, almost certainly she's got some chad action on the side. depite her social anxiety she still has girls nights where she goes with her friends dancing at the club right? sometimes she doesn't come back till the next day right? she says she's just hanging out with her friends right? lol