Hey Sup Forums

Hey Sup Forums
I'm slightly overweight,
How do I get "fit"?
Looking for serious advice here, cunts

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start with 30 minutes of cardio a day. that shit slims ya right up

kill yourself and save your soul

calories in < calories expended.
Couch to five k.

Eat better, eat less, move your body

If only we had a fitness board

If only Sup Forums wasnt for everything. Its not just for memes and porn.

Mountain-bike for 45 minutes, rest, then mountain -bike 45 minutes back.

>take my word for it, or not. It's easier than it sounds, asshole.

Lissen up faggot, you´re looking for a special method because you are a lazy piece of shit. There are no shortcuts, just eat healthy and count your fucking calories + very little carbon hydrates and fats. No fucking sugar, no juice, just goddamn water. If you wan´t to have a nice slim body, you have to move your fat ass around as well. That´s it, no matter what else you hear, it´s all bullshit. Either you are lazy or fucking stupid to understand why you are fat. So stup being lazy and/or stupid.

Count your calories using an app. Be as precise as possible.

Calculate what amount of calories you're using in a day as precise as possible.

Consume about 500 kcal less than you use a day.

If you want to optimize your results for losing less muscle and more fat, do a strength program like Starting Strength.

avoid carbs. they contain a lot of calories but don't make you feel full. also, fill up on fiber as much as you can.

other than that, be active. if you find it difficult to just work out for the sake of working out, find something you enjoy that is also good exercise. for instance, hike in the woods instead of walking on the treadmill. mountain biking instead of spending time on a stationary bike.

try jogging while listening to audiobooks.

>Carbon Hydrates?

Cut out all sugar. Cut out as many carbs as you can stand. Don't eat anything that you wouldn't have eaten 10,000 years ago. Meat, eggs, vegetables. Move around. You don't have to turn into a fucking jogger, just do something physical.

Do bodyweight exercises like situps, pullups, pushups if you want to build muscles for free.

OP here
Lets say i'll do workout for 30 mins a day. What would be the best routine?
Also controlling what i eat is kind of out of question, it'd be too long and personal to explain. Lets just say my grandmother makes me dinners.

gradually begin cutting carbs, sweets, sugary drinks (including juice), aspartane, and any fatty foods from your diet. Replace those foods with foods high in protein content. Drink ice-cold water (cold water makes your body have to heat up in order to process it and warm your body up burning a tiny bit extra calories). Start doing exercises at least 30 minutes a day, 3x a week.

Change your lifestyle. Dont eat food that you cant recognize in its original form. I can tell a Brussels sprout is a Brussel sprout. But put a box of cereal in front of me... I dont know where that fucking came from.

Eat clean and you are 90% of the way there.

ketosis, look it up

>Also controlling what i eat is kind of out of question, it'd be too long and personal to explain. Lets just say my grandmother makes me dinners.
Then you are pretty much going to be fat forever unless you are doing 2-3 hour work outs.

Thread shift. You sound like you need a job and a good dose of personal responsibility.... which is also a symptom of being fat. The lack of personal responsibility and self control

Are you talking a gym or just at home?

Tell Nana that you're trying to lose weight and let her make you vegetables. Drink water and unsweetened tea.

There is literally a board called /fit/.
Are you really that fucking stupid?

mmm free range tendies

Do cardio and stuff

Take adderall if you need that appetite suppressant

Workout and diet u stupid fat piece of shit.

Is srsly no one gonna talk about the fkn goat eating live chicken? Probably the most brutal thing i've seen today

newfag

What should the calory intake of someone who doesn't exercise at all look like?

To reiterate, don't "count your calories" like these number-autists suggest.

Cardio like a beast, and eat healthy. Don't overanalyze it.

Serious, these calorie counters piss me off. Don't be a bitch.

cut out carbs. then after about a month or a month and a half. start exercising and eating whatever you want but keep your calories low or intermittent fast. and always eat every few hours, but not much.

depends on your height and age look up online for a basal metabolic rate calculator

Probably like 1800. I base this on absolutely nothing. Also assumes any job you have doesn't require movement.

>you wouldn't have eaten 10,000 years ago
I can't remember that long ago. Instructions unclear I am a cave creature now. pic related.

free weights, not too heavy though. and running or cycling if running is too hard on joints.

then just remember 3500 calories cut is about a pound lost.

>y, those are $0?

Honestly,

The best way to lose weight is to find a physical activity that you actually enjoy and want to do.

E.g. I love playing disc golf. I have lost 75 lbs in a year from playing it. Tried diet and gym exercise before that but it never worked.

Its gotta be a fun physical activity that you will want to do over and over. Otherwise you will lose motivation and stop. Fad diets won't help you. You need a lifestyle change and the only way to do that is make a physical activity part of your lifestyle.

I still eat whatever I want and continue to lose weight, but I exercise damn near everyday now so it doesn't matter.

>I have lost 75 lbs in a year from playing it.

Typo, should read lost 75 lbs in 2 years.

>*throws frisbee*
"Whew, burnt nearly 1/3 of a calorie there, better have a sit down."

Healthy food is too low in calories. Give me meal plan you Faggots, not this eat less bullshit

troll

Its actually the 10km of hiking around in rough terrain that results in exercise. Honestly, just not sitting on your ass in front of the computer is quite effective. Play a few rounds and before you know it, you have hiked a fuck ton.

>kiking
fixed for you

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

sure

>>/fit/

The frisbee golfers I've seen are uniformly fat and/or 12 years old.

kekking is also effective

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

Dunno, seems like user hit the nail on the head.

>the goat is eating the chick

What the fuck.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

samefagging this hard

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

The Sup Forumsots have developed a glitch.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

There is plenty of things dude.

However fitness is not a one size fit all.
I have friends that can go hardcore diet brocolli and chiken for a few weeks during cutting season then they bulk exe. Other friends eat a bit more unhealthy but compensate by working out a lot. Me personally I am just trying to learn to cook more healthy food while working out a lot.

A great game i Found is "Healthyfy that"
Aka take unhealthy food.
Make it healthy by replacing ingredients.
Maintain as much of the good taste as possible.

For an example take hamburger meat with healthy things instead of bread and fries.

Good luck OP.
We all been there/are there.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

...

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

Just report this spamming autistic kid and move on with your life.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

Eat meat, green veggies and drink diet soda and water.

Occasional have some strawberries, sugar free jello and cool whip to reduce cravings for sugar.

A lot of fat, little to no carbs.

>Wants serious advice
>Calls us cunts

Get your fatass on a treadmill and start lifting.

Back to basics.

Cook meals and remeber that unhealthy foods are meerly temporary sensations that hold long term detriments to our health.

Start slow by jogging and push ups then work your way up to the cooler shit.

Eat a lot of rabbit. the meat is very lean and has nearly no fat in it so i recommend that and start going to the gym, oh don't forget to eat stuff that makes your motabilism faster

Btw op. I recommend to go to /fit/. Anytime you go to B some autistic fag reks it.

I am guessing you are fat and hate yourself for it, so you project that hate outwards on Sup Forums. It is pretty obvious.

dubs don't lie

Obligatory video btw;
youtu.be/x2MoEM1Vrbk

Samefag? Or Usain bolt, Keyboard warrior edition?

get a dog.
walk it for an hour at least once a day.
you can slack off every now and again as long as you make up for it the next day.

Go on amazon. For 50$ buy a 100lbs barbell set. When that becomes too light for you buy another 100 pounds. Eat a shit ton of Rice, Vegetables and lean protein. Youll go from fat too muscle mass

underrated post of keks

>>/fit/

a cat is fine too

get a gf.
fuck it for an hour at least once a day.
you can slack off every now and again as long as you don't have any niggers living nearby.

good advice i recommend a fat girl because you need to work harder to cum.

Solid advice here, OP.

Join a Jewish work camp. Works every time.

Work will set you free

I just flew in from /fit/
I count my calories and weigh my food, I use myfitnesspal but there's plenty of apps out there.

You probably need to stay around or below 2000 depending on your height.

I just ate 3 bowls of Cooke crisps cereal, 2 plates of moms spaghetti and an egg, cheese and ham sandwich.

>what is wrong with me?