it's your birthday

> it's your birthday
> this 13 year old girl has been spending the whole day spoiling you
> finally it's the end of the day
> she says "for your last gift... come with me"
> she takes you to her bedroom. No one else is at home
> suddenly she jumps on the bed and looks at you like this
> "I know you've wanted to do this to me for for a while... so I'll let you. Happy birthday"

What do you do, Sup Forums?

No

Look around for chris haaaaannnnssssoooon

strip, tuck my dick and dance provocatively while "Goodbye Horses" by Q Lazzarus plays in the background

play monopoly

> it's your birthday
> this 13 year old girl has been spending the whole day spoiling you
What why? Where are the adults I live with?

...

Kek

Obviously with skin lotion in close proximity

I'd do a 360
And walk away

No ones home, she seems willing.

Time for anal.

>...so I'll let you

It's no fun when they're not squirming and screaming.

Probably wonder what sort of life decisions led me to thnk hanging out with a modern 13 year old was a good idea. Specially one who is such a massive slut.

Tell her she's 4 years too old

mind blown

so you'll go no where and just end up walking into her

Noped the fuck out of that situation long before it ever got to that point.

this

I knew it, all along they said I was crazy but this proves it,
Slash her throat, run out the door before the other agents can stop me, head south start a new life under a new name in sunny mexico
Kill people only occasionally for sport/stress relief, slaughter is bad for the soul

Newfag

I find it highly unlikely that a 13-year-old girl has the means to spoil me on my birthday. As for sex, I like older women.

what a weird situation to be in

you do not know the way

I’ll tell the dumb bitch to get your dirty fucking shoes off my bed.

same girl?

Question my bizarre life choices that led me to be spending my birthday with a 13 year old girl.

walk out, close the door on her and go sleep in my own room, finally some peace and quiet after spending my birthday putting up with the most annoying demographic in existence

...

go to jail

Poor weed into her snatch, water into her ass, grab the lighter and rip anal bongs.

Put her sitting in front of me and spend 30 minutes just slowly brushing her hair out.

Actually, my sister's 13 and she's pretty fucking funny. Although now I've said that she's probably pulling some ridiculous shit in my absence.

Call her parents and tell them that her behaviour is unappropriate. That she should wait fir marriage

>smile to her
>like the most delicate and warm smile I can bring
>show her the little box I ve been carrying with me since I know her
>I ve been waiting so long for this
>ohgoditsmychance.psd
>extract around 1meter long of wire from the mallet
>approach her
>her eyes widen
>take the needle in the little box
>proceed to repair her fucking degenerate jeans
Now gtfo trashy bitch

M O D S MODS MODS SDOM! PEDOCUCK UP IN HERE

tickle the shit out of her

with my penis

Fuck her brains out.

Then wake up from the dream.

>bitch slap

NOW GTFO

pedos confirmed

Fucking read my mind. Top. Kek.

She'll suddenly turn, 13 is the kickoff age for most but plenty are early/late, they all suddenly turn when the bitch demon arrives and they have to relearn how to act like humans again, and only let it out on the schedule as agreed in the great truce

Pedo is children under puberty. Can we steralise anyone that doesn't meet the intelligence quotient yet? Probably around 120, willing to put this figure under review if case evidence presented.

Replace last line with:

> "What are we gonna do on the bed?" *pomf*

We may or may not have had anal

BURN THE SODOMITE

>gulp gulp gulp gulp
>*cough* I chugged too much
>thanks user. That was some good orange juice

Id lick and suck every inch of her and have her drink my piss and have her piss and drink it, then have her poop and eat it all like a good little girl.

fuck her brains out what the hell others
When I was 13 I wanted to fuck everyone so she does too probably

punch her face and tell her shes worthless

What is it with people with shoes on the bed these days? I was always brought up to believe this was practically a hanging offence. Along with dropping litter. Now every fucker seems to jump on the bed with shoes on. Filthy, filthy swines.

kek

Young pussy is best pussy

Cut it off first with a box cutter, punch it, wear, do 911.

Girls aren't like that

Lol yes they are

Yeah I'm fully prepared for the imminent shitstorm. She's a mischievous little bugger so if she uses that trait for evil, I'm fucked.

nope

Dubs checked. Also I’d rather it be some kind of practicum. IQ tests are shit, too many dumbasses will get through. A bunch of hands on, situational evaluations would be much more accurate IMO

>be me
>use magic to turn her 18
>various sex positions
>full nelson, upside down drilling,doggy style, 69
>legs over my shoulders
>grab her hips and thrust them repeatedly
>both of us cum

People don't change, they get better at what they do, if it's a bad thing then they just get sneakier

Neat, Cubist frog. Saved.

right?

>No, you got it wrong. YOU've been wanting to do this to me. And I'll let you.

Hi, I'm Chris Canson, come cith ce

>not turning her 18 after the sexytime

Ya dun goofed.

Kek

...

whats her instagram?

Newfags get out

Too old

>cut off her arms at the shoulder
>rape the new stump holes
>beat her to death with her own severed arms
>?
>profit

Why not just kiss and make love to her forever

what are you some kind of faggot?