Be me

>be me
>decide to start my night early yesterday
>get off work, end up drinking around 300mg of DXM
>get dressed, planned to go to a local death metal show to get my trash out
>start tripping once the show starts
>notice a girl who looks familar
>write it off as me being high
>after the next set, go outside for a smoke
>start to drink beer, ended up drinking 6 that night
>see her again, realize she is actually my old friend from high school
>after the show, go to waffle house with her friends
>i'm checking out one of her friends, we'll call her jessica
>once we're getting ready to leave I pay for jessica's shit
>we leave, she drops off my friend and the other chick off
>they had left their vehicle back at the venue
>once they hop out I ask her if she wanted to chill
>she says yes
>we get back to her place, she loads a bowl >we're cuddled up watching live performances on youtube
>cuddling got really intimate, now i'm certain that it could have gotten further
>but at the moment I was so messed up I just couldn't figure it out
>she brings me home when the sun comes up, we stayed up that late
>so she was waiting on me to make a move
>but once she was sure that's all that was happening she gave up
>I could have made a good night a fucking amazing night and I fucked up
>this happens every time I get my chance

so how's your weekend going, fags?

I don't know, but i fucking love DXM

u didnt even fuck her?

just kill urself

jus kidding tho

way to go

Dissociation lost its appeal to me, and 300mg was probably too much on top of 6 beers. Gotta keep a shred of sobriety to know when it’s tine to slow down/stop.

Some time last week i blacked out and drank 3 of those new 5 hour energy shaped dxm syrups with 450 mg in them and drank half a handle of vodka throughout the day
Fun times, was fucking wierd coming out of it and i was in the dissociative hell for a few hours

I’m glad my body has such an aversion to the texture, smell, and taste of the syrup. It’s such a shitty high besides those first few times you really get to third plateau.

I prefer ketamine honestly

I can imagine. Never came across it though. Seems like it would be a lot cleaner.

yeah I was really fucked up once we got to her place, weed didn't help. If I had even imagined this happening to me I would have cut the dxm. I saw her again tonight coincidentally and she totally blew me off. It just hurts man, that's all.

Live and learn my friend. I’ve found alcohol let’s me slip up and make really dumb decisions, that’s probably what fucked you up the most, especially if you’re cool going out on 300mg.

It's pretty easy to extract. It's just an acid-base extraction. Though these days they add tons of glycol and glycerin to the syrup to make it harder, but it's still possible to do.

>300mg of DXM
>start tripping once the show starts
ultimately depends on your weight and overall tolerance but that's not that high of a dose. If you started tripping on 300mg, you do realize your sex drive is kaput? DXM kills labido, even at low doses.
It usually takes up to 12-24 hours to recover fully.

so even if you managed to 'make a move' you would be butt naked with a flaccid peepee while trying to hide it with foreplay, figuring out what the fuck to do next.

so in essence you probably dodged a bullet user.

why is fucking girls a status symbol? I prefer to cuddle them :D dont even have to pay for condoms

This is true. Although I remember having great jack off sessions that’d last an hour or two because it took that long to actually cum.

I’ll stick to weed and lsd for now.

just stick to drinks you fucking moron

I really hope you're right because she's probably with some other dude tonight. i'm just trying to convince myself that it wouldn't have been that great of an experience but it's hard. I asked if she wanted to chill at my place after the show and she deadass told me she was going right home after this and going to sleep but then some dude asked her to go smoke with them and she just said sure and left. no goodbyes or anything, fucking ignoring me with her phone when we were having great conversations the night before, all because I didn't have sex with her right away? that fucking infuriates me because I was so ready to learn all of these things about her and I thought she was really cool but obviously not. This is why I have fucking social anxiety and general envy/hate towards the general populus of people in actual relationships. reading situations like these just come so easy to them for some reason.

You have anxiety because you’re getting too fucked yo for your own good and can’t fucking finish when it comes to real life with other people. This is on you, not her.

Let me rephrase when I said I was tripping. I felt the effects during the beginning of the show but the alcohol tends to strengthen my disassociation so later on I was definitely tripping.

even when I was in high school not getting fucked up I was like this. I'm fucking 22 now and nothing has changed. This can't be on me if it's just my inherent trait.

move on. she's 100% not interested in you. you being clingy does not help at all either. there's a magical switch in every females brain that tells them to avoid bad matches at all costs.
It doesn't even sound like she was interested you personally. she just wanted some attention and maybe an easy fuck. she likely got what she wanted later that night and it wasn't from you.
you're going to experience this multiple times through life. confidence is key.

“This cant be on me because it’s just me”
What a retarded thing to say, anxiety is something you can work through and overcome. Being dissociated by definition cuts you off from others and the world around you. Think that would help your situation and anxiety? Fucking retard.

I mean no, i don't think it helps my situation. I haven't tried to actually pick up girls in 2 years. I lost hope a while ago, I just figured my personality isn't compatible in that way. This just literally fell into my lap and I blew it and that's why I'm pissed at myself. not angry at anyone, just really hating myself more than usual tonight.

Personality is really just a culmination of all the tiny decisions you make everyday. It’s something you can change if you want. I’ve always been terribly socially anxious but now I’m making an effort to be more outgoing and myself and now its really not that bad. You can change.

What band

I've been trying, I go out a lot more and i'm in touch with the underground live music scene where I live. I have a really long way to go obviously. I used to live at my computer desk and lock my self away playing counter strike every day.

headliners were bodysnatcher, second death, widomaker. Don't remember the two that opened because they weren't very good.

Sounds like you just fucked up. I hope you learned you should use dxm how it should be used. High dose, by yourself in bed, with trippy music. Stick to weed and alcohol if you’re going out.

I'm alone and it went better than that, WFT dude?