Hey fellow mental-illness tards
What do you do to be a functional person and strengthen yourself?
I'm 20 and I'm a fucking mess. My childhood was literal hell and I've come out the other side a broken person that has to work twice as hard to do what other people can do normally
I emotionally abuse other people.
Macri cat made it here, the meme only grows bigger with repetition
Cry the pain away.
I mean let the tears wash the pain away
>inb4 clean your room
I do this too, but feel bad about it.
I'm fucked though, self hating repressing transer with agoraphobia.
I exercise a lot and have cultivated a really healthy diet. Then I put almost all of my remaining time into an exhausting job helping others so that I’m too tired to feel bad for myself at day’s end.
It usually works.
I used to be a fucking slobbering drunk.
That worked too, but it’s not the path I recommend.
I choose the Reptilion.
honestly? get yourself into an unhealthily dependent relationship with somebody, just make it less bad than what you had before. find some kinks as an outlet for your self hate.
DD/lg and equivalent are good for that. some caring mixed with degrading acts.
How long do you think u can run from your past? When will it catch up? Mid life? Mid life crisis?
read enough to understand the failings in your upbringing, forgive where you can, let go where you can’t. have friends and understand boundaries and codependency because these things don’t come naturally to people with fucked childhoods
oh and clean your room
How do you forgive?
How do you "let go"?
i feel ya. life sucked hard when i was a kid. im very bipolar and went into a manic episode lasting for a few years. i got help and came out of it a different person. im no longer manic. im fucking paranoid now. im ashamed of so much shit ive done. i have almost no memory of years and years except for the shit i dont want to remember. idk its been around 6 years ive been stable and i still cant function normally.
people who fuck you are rarely put together themselves
its only where it looks like they’re getting away with shit that i get bitter and vindictive
Just seek professional help. Clowns on this cambodian breast milk board are just as fucked up as you if not more. Myself included
going to > 1000 12steps did it for me. i can’t control other people, i used to have that illusion. and even when i thought i didn’t i acted like i did
meds and therapy is how I do it.
I've been in those. I don't think it helps you to be any happier to make compromises for someone else just for the sake of being around them.
I am the most prudish gender bender you'd ever meet and refuse to let other people touch my bum, much less do anything crazy. I find most if not all kinks absolutely repulsive.
Right now I just pour my efforts into writing an album I've been ironing out since 2012, and smoke weed to switch off when necessary.
that and the fact you’re here in the first place
>still
i often wonder why i’m afraid of Sup Forums tier honesty with those i love, likely fear of rejection and shame
"be healthy"
Gee why didn't I think of that
Bitch please, mid life? I already fight shin splints and tendinitis every day, and had to stop weights for rotator cuff injury. I’ll be trading in hips by 50, but dopamine is a hell of an antidepressant. I give myself 2 years at current rate before I can’t maintain the stress and activity with the amount of sleep I get and having taken literally 2 days off in the past 8 months, both for a funeral trip.
Which is why I already have plans in place to transition into grad school in a year and a half, leave my 80 hour a week nonprofit job to some other poor bleeding heart, get more rest and start making more money. 2 years after that, my partner and I have plans to move into a better house and generally improve quality of life. 2 years after that we reevaluate the next decade gameplan. Maybe move states again.
Keep adjusting, keep adjusting, try to stay ahead of the creeping tide of exhaustion and depression.
& maybe things would be different if I dated a man, but that would require no sex for at least a year or two, which is unreasonable.
This... I'm trying to be good.. My ex left me after we lived together five years. It isn't easy. Being more intelligent than others has made the money easier, but I'll probably never find love.
Eventually I'll probably off myself, but I'm going to make a few mil first.
bragging or complaining?
Wtf are you rambling about?
>iamverysmart
That attitude is why you feel the way you do. You clearly aren't that smart, because you haven't worked this out.
This is why I didn't claim to be anything good.
I’m going to go with bragging. I’m pretty good with how I’m coping. 7 years ago I was so depressed I didn’t talk to people for days at a time and wouldn’t eat. 3 years ago I was going through a litre of vodka a day.
Now I’m healthy and have a meaningful job, and if it’s exhausting and overwhelming, it still makes me proud to be alive. That’s pretty good, right? Depression: 1 Me: 1
I didn't say I'm very smart, dipshit. I said my intelligence makes money easier. How many millions do you have? None? Eat my shit, pussy.
I dunno, man it’s late and I’m enthusiastic to answer OPs question
U dont know anything cuz u dont know anything about yourself. Keep running. Keep running from that pain
Sounds like money bought u happiness......
>I am above average intelligence
>Have problems I can't solve
>Reject solution
>"I have some money"
>Still posts on Sup Forums unironically seeking validation
kek
Nope. I'm fucking miserable. My favorite thing is fighting for sport and giving people gifts so I feel like I'm not so bad. I hate myself.
>Miserable
>Claims to be smart
>Still can't work out that arrogance doesn't make you likeable, even to yourself
Ya like I want validation from you jizz rags. My point was I'm not pleasable. Don't be jealous because you are poor. You were designed to lose in every aspect. I was designed to win and feel like I'm losing.
both are terrible.
>feel like I'm losing
No mate, you don't just feel like it lol
You have money and no social skills, no ability to introspect, no ability to learn from yourself. To top that off, your best solution so far is to seek validation (and lie about your motivations to boot) from a bunch of internet trolls.
You're even taking it seriously, to drive the point home.
Step 1. Drop the negativity.
Especially towards yourself.
Just cuz your parents hated you(hated themselves) does not mean you hafta hate u.
I didn't use the word smart, cunt. You are so unintelligent you don't know the difference.
yes arrogance is one of my worst characteristics, but I'm intelligent enough to not share that side when I'm around others. Everyone thinks I'm a sweetheart when in reality I traded in my heart for money.
Hard to like yourself if you're a cunt
Nobody at all is fooled. That's why you're unhappy Not even you yourself are fooled.
>Being more intelligent than others
Faggot
You're a self admitted disingenuous socially inept loser who is desperately seeking any kind of solution that doesn't involve actually improving yourself in any way, hence your pathetic attitude toward genuine criticism.
Thanks man I'm trying. I float and I project positivity as much as I can irl. However in my subconscious everything is very dark and my dreams are horrific. I don't call them nightmares because often I'm the perpetrator of horrific acts. It sickens me that I have such thoughts. My friends don't get why I'm not happy with what I have, but they do blow and live shitty lives. My best friend and my brother keep me motivated to live,but fuck I want to be loved by a woman again. I had a gf the majority of my adult life and now that I'm single I am just a testosterone loaded bull who is unlovable because I don't know how to romance anymore. I spent so much time in the presence of darkness when women warm up to me I push them away both consciously and subconsciously.
Re-read this thread.
go take a class or join a club of something you think is fun or might like to try. you can learn new skills and make new friends. "when all you have is a hammer every problem looks like a nail" learning new skills will give you a different outlook on the world.
Some things will always suck though.
don't worry too much about it you're only 20, most modern societies don't REALLY consider you an adult untill you"re near 30. you have plenty of time to get straight.
Loser is relative. I can have anything I want except being content. Even when I was in love I was never happy. Where was genuine criticism? All I saw was poor fags hating. I am supposed to be a guy that helps people, but it doesn't seem worth it when everyone else is so selfish. I only help my friends and family at this point.
Everyone else is just a commodity to me now.
These threads amaze me. This is why you people stay mentally ill forever. Instead of putting effort into your life and improving it you're arguing on the fucking chan.
I reread it and it said work on my attitude. I'll do that, but it's gradual. It gets better on average over time, but nights like this I feel pretty down.
Goodnight all. Thank you to the single guy that actually had something positive to bring to the table. Perhaps it will make me be the nice guy who I set out to be before all the pain took over my senses.
>Thank you to the single guy that actually had something positive to bring to the table
Something good to learn along with being positive in life is that you have to deal with negative shit. You can't just change and only expect positive things out of life, because when something negative finally happens you won't know how to deal with it.