What is sex like with Michael Gira? It’s a question I’ve pondered many times, about a great many men, but the thought of sexual intercourse with Michael Gira is something I constantly return to, more so than others. Sex with Friedrich Nietzsche must have surely been terrifyingly masochistic and dangerous (not without protection, Freddy). Ingmar Bergman’s many affairs meant he was probably a great lover in bed, but he also probably cried relentlessly afterwards every time out of guilt and the lack of God’s answers for shagging. Someone like Cary Grant would have been a fantastically smooth talker, but given that he was probably gay, he would also have probably been a slight disappointment. Klaus Kinski would probably not allow you to make a single sound, in case you distract him from his task. A Marlene Dietrich would probably eat you alive and forget about you immediately. It goes on. But Michael Gira? Lord knows what that’s like. I don’t think Jarboe could bring herself to talk about it if you asked her, it was probably too terrifying, or maybe even non-existent. After many hours pondering (because what better things do I have to do than ponder how Michael Gira tackles penetration?), I have come to the conclusion that Mr. Gira is either entirely asexual and has always been that way, or he’s a complete fucking jackhammer. I can imagine him hating sex like he hates absolutely everything. On the other hand perhaps he only hates everything because he does not get enough sex. If it’s the latter than he’s probably incredibly frustrated in bed anyway, and it leads to 300mph machine-gun fucking. Does he even have a mattress? Is it just a metal or concrete slab? I doubt Michael Gira has a memory foam mattress. There’s probably a bunch of metal chains hanging around for sado-masochistic stuff, and also love poems to Jarboe and some hot waitress in a place he frequents, although I suppose Michael Gira probably only eats goat intestines.
What is sex like with Michael Gira? It’s a question I’ve pondered many times, about a great many men...
rape
Im glad you took the time to write this
what
Wtf why Is he naked and has a small dick
>tfw mine is even smaller
I unironically like your writing, op. It reminds me of Kafka. Keep up the good work.
>I doubt Michael Gira has a memory foam mattress
You got me here kek
>thinking flaccid has anything to do with erect
dont they teach this stuff in american high school, or do they skip that like most of the curriculum?
But that's like..... super small. There's no way a dick is that small flaccid and then gets to any more than like 5 inches erect.
You're not alone user ;_;
Yep, that's a small peepee even if it is flaccid
>tfw i have almost the exact same body
>small weewee and all
I guess if I it should help me feel slightly less insecure but I'm sure if I was the leader of a group like SWANS I would be able to not give a fuck about muh dick size and out of shape frame as well.
a-at least it gets to a normal size when erect, but holy shit, i look like a greek statue when soft, and not in the good way...
>tfw never can shower with the bros at gym cos of that
Again, don't they teach this stuff in american high schools? Do you not have a penis of your own? Flaccid has virtually no correlation with erect. You could have a 1 inch flaccid dick and be 7 erect, or 4 flaccid and only 5 erect.
>tfw never can shower with the bros at gym cos of that
I refused to join the military because of my tiny dick insecurity. I mean, I probably wouldn't have anyway but I never even considered it simply because I refuse to shower naked with other guys who might potentially insult me.
you are fucking retarded, no one gives a fuck about your dick at those places, especially in the fucking military
didnt he get raped at 15?
I think my dick is that small in flaccid ( though it's hard to say) and it goes beyond 6 inches when erect, so I guess that's your proof.
almost, apparently. some hippie at the jail saved him or something
Is this copypasta
This is the greatest post I've ever read