Why is Quidditch so stupid?

Why is Quidditch so stupid?

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It was designed to make Harry be a winner

Because it's soccer

It was a sport designed by a woman

Cuz you can catch the fucking Snitch and fucking lose.
Such a stupid gimmick game.

The snitch should not be worth so many points. it makes the rest of the game pointless

the skill ceiling is absurdly low, play a real game

It's basically a dumbfuck hybrid of two games: the real game of catching the snitch and a flying soccer game to keep the crowd from getting bored. The soccer game has just enough potential to make the players try and make the audience care but not enough for it to usually make a difference.

It's supposed to be silly

the whole series is stupid. the only good thing about them is they encouraged people to read, but now the new ones aren't even books so

WOuld it better if there wasn't the snitch rule?

I think the snitch makes a team not "parking the bus", because they need the fucking points

*just enough potential chance of influencing the outcome

Because Harry Potter is so stupid.

Rowling needed something for her dumb faggot kid to actually be good at, seeing how he's useless at everything else, so she had to invent a gimmick sport that relies completely on one person.

Bravo, simply bravo.

You're seriously asking about the integrity of a game being played inside one of the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises? Each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody, just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

Never gets old

>comparing HP to Dostoevsky

wew lad

Also what did Twain and Carroll ever do to you? Alice is god tier. Fuck off back to your containment board, autist.

>rest of game doesnt matter as long as your team gets the snitch

seriously how fucking dumb

>Tolkien in shit tier
>Tolkien in same tier as SUNSET FOUND HER SQUATTING

now i'm really cross m8

It's the sort of game a rich Englishman would come up with when cricket made too much sense

Is David Warner related to Shane Warner?

That's why you wait catching it untill you have a big enoug lead to be ensured to win when it's caught, you fucking retard
l2RTS

>fun fact
>the Norwegian term for the Snitch(Snoppen) in the books means "penis" in Swedish

it's a "sport" which was invented by somebody who has no sports background. that's like letting somebody who was born blind paint a painting or direct a movie

Because it has stupid rules and never serves the narrative. It's filler that somehow ends up being worse than pod-racing and probending.

Supposedly that's not entirely the case. Getting the Snitch is such a rare occurrence that most games finish without it happening, it's really just supposed to be a fun gimmick to keep the spectators excited.

Still retarded how Harry catches it every fucking time and how it's worth so many points.

Only the snitch is weird. If it were worth 50 points then it would be fine.

I love it, I also loved the EA game and I hadn't even seen the movies yet when I played it.

>the Snitch is such a rare occurrence that most games finish without it happening

Either I'm grossly misremembering things, you vastly mistyped this, or you're a fully retarded individual

Games in the HP universe in general, not the ones at Hogwarts that Harry plays in, retard.

>no Atlas Shrugged in God-Tier

I'm almost 100% certain one of the base rules of quidditch is that the game doesn't end until a snitch is caught

Oh shit you're right.

I don't even like Harry Potter, I wrote what my friend told me.

>never serves the narrative
But that's wrong, almost every Quidditch match does something to move the plot forward.

Just buy a clock.

Why are all possible scores multiples of ten? Why not have a goal be worth one point and the snitch be worth 15 points? Why multiply everything by ten?

It was designed around making Harry Potter important in his first year. Of course wizards are silly and backwards, "no logic at all". Maybe it was invented more normal and balanced but then someone with no skill but a lot of power/money wanted a new position with the most importance? Without the snitch or seeker, it's a team game where you protect each other from bludgers, pass the ball and get it through hoops and should end after a set time (that way some games wouldn't take five minutes and others a week)

I wonder what came first, House Points or Quidditch Points. If Slytherin wins 60 points in a quidditch match, and Hufflepuff wins 150, they get added to the house points

Sports with fixed time limits are stupid though, that's why Baseball is GOAT.

Well how would you end Quidditch otherwise?
First to 100? 8 innings?

Why isn't every player constantly searching for the INSTANT GAME WINNING ball?

Did Rowling just add the snitch so Harry could be the hero that won every game single-handedly regardless of anything else that happened?

Fuck off with your meme "sport" that can be a day.
American Football is where it's at.

>Watching Goblet of Fire during my comfy marathon
>They skip the entire Quidditch World Cup
>DID YA PUT UR NAME IN THE GOBLET ARRY? DID YA??

What went so wrong?

this is literally the most retarded fucking conversation i've seen on this board and i've been here for almost 10 years

This

>muh fat people slamming into each other once every five minutes sport
youtube.com/watch?v=jTnOmruhRLc

You figure they'd at least have 2 players per team play seeker. You're not telling me every single Quidditch team plays with exactly the same amount of players in their respective positions. Like, nobody has thought to shake it up and drop a chaser for an extra seeker.

Because then the other team will keep scoring goals on you until you lose anyway.

>they skip the scene where Harry gets literally mindbreak and tries to suicide after seeing a Veela slut

It seems like you'd want multiple people seeking the snitch. Sure, if you are down a billion points, it won't matter if you catch it, but you can overcome such huge deficits and win that really the snitch is all that matters.

I always assumed they're only allowed to have one seeker and it doesn't count if someone besides the seeker catches it.

The thing that most people miss because Harry Potter grew more and more serious as time went by, is that Quidditch is also somewhat of a joke.

In the first book it is presented as something absolutely ridiculous, with complicated rules, weird scores, violent in an absurd and kind of funny way. It was the game for Harry to be confused about at the start, it's a game designed to look weird to muggles.

because it was invented by a shitty novelist

Vi kallar den kvicken

So if the rules were the same but you were allowed to have any number of players on a position what do you think would be the most optimal strategy?

I still think you need two beaters seeing how there's two bludgers.

Didn't they lack standardized brooms?

So it was pay-to-go-faster?

Literal toddlers and capuchins can see the flaw in this

>europeans
>sports

>capuchins
you wot?

1,2,1.5,2.5. A keeper, a dedicated chaser, a dedicated bludger, a chaser/bludger hybrid, whose main task would be to play bludger, but would still occasionally make bursts towards the rings to assist the chaster, a seeker/chaser hybrid,whose main job would be chasing, but would also assist in catching the snitch if it came near him and two seekers.

>falling for the pasta
W E W

Woman cannot understand sport.

>american """"""""football"""""""""

Jk Rowling could give a dollar to every single person in Africa and still get rolling

American football is for niggers, convicts, and retards.

Quidditch really isn't that complicated. I can't believe you mooks have such a hard time comprehending it.

People aren't saying it's complicated, they're saying it's retarded. And they're right.

maybe just maybe the wizarding world is supposed to be crazy

Because it was written by a hack author(authoress?) for a garbage book series for children and not some balding manlet that watches day time tv sports shows in his early to late 30s

>I'm sorry, we designed it wrong on porpouse, as a joke.

youtube.com/watch?v=meiU6TxysCg

Replace the tokens with brooms and the nut with the snitch and even they could see the game is shit

The snitch/seeker is literally only there to make Harry a Mary Sue.

>things numale manlets really believe

I have no fucking clue what you mean lad.

If anything the seeker is made exactly for manlets.

Why you gotta samefag?
anyway, a seeker needs to be small and speedy. that's why it goes to girls

I didn't samefag I made the first post. The best seekers in the world are men.

Sup Forums had a good thread on this... Wish I could find it.

The spot is the most convoluted, shit fest created.

Such as?

As it should be, still would rather watch than the NBA

>lets put a half blind kid for the "you need top gun vision" position.

That you're insecure. About wizard fantasty.

Best quidditch

3>2>6>1>>Best broom scenes

3>2>flying keys>seven potters>thames>room of requirement>6>1=first task>4

>people play this sport in college with pvc pipe

>Sup Forums
neck yourself cyber syrian

Harry potter can get you laid

Don't be ridiculous.

3>1>2>everything else. At least the first three movies had some magical charm to them. The rest is just absolute garbage.

Holy fuck you're right.

That's just fucking retarded. What the hell is wrong with Rowling?

why are people saying it's soccer when the useless scoring, violence and retarded endgame that actually decides everything is basically American sports 101?

where you been marcus

>muh magic
>muh why is it darker after voldemort returns
Go back to letterboxd

sorry user this was for

Nailed it

Wew lad, british humour

4 is the worst 3 is the best. Nobody irl overrates 1 2 as much as the friendless nostalgia fags on Sup Forums

Other than the Snitch being fucking bullshit, it's a fucking cool-looking sport don't deny.

>it's a fucking cool-looking sport
pffffthahaha. do you play throw the frisbI mean disc ""golf"" too

Considering there are people in the opposing team who's entire role is to try and knock you off your broom, why the FUCK would you even want to play this game and risk dying like that?

It's a sport for dumb jocks, a la American Football.

they would have some anti-gravity charm or whatever near the bottom

women can't understand sports

...

>people like this exist

youtube.com/watch?v=rkMJzJVLRFw

i love the changing opening sentences