listen to this album

> listen to this album
> kinda boring, mediocre, overrated

months later (today)
> professor breaks students up into pairs to critique what we've written
> girl I'm paired with raises her hand, and asks if we should all get paired with new people, so that we're not repeating
> goes one by one with every other student in the class, and sees that we're literally the only repeat
> clearly wants to get away from me, but says in a pitying way "oh no, you're a fine partner!" and prof observes jokingly that I seem offended
> class breaks for end of course party
> I leave immediately
> look for music that will make me want to kill myself less, or at least will work with these feels
> try pic related
> HOLY SHIT I GET IT
> still wanna kill myself tho

you wanna kill yourself over someone not wanting to partner with you?

It was just such clear, intense social rejection, in front of the entire class.

Sometimes I speak too much in class. I think it's mostly because of social isolation - in class, I feel a deep desire to express myself, maybe too much. The other students usually seem to think my comments are good, but some of them clearly find me kind of annoying.
Or at least that's what I tell myself. Maybe that's all it is, that I just need to speak less. Or maybe I'm coming off in some way I'm unaware of, that's turning me into a reject and pariah. I don't know.

Are you actually smart though?

This shit happens all the time. Sometimes people are so used to comfort they don't want to interact with different people; don't take it personally.

Btw, there's only like 10 left of this album on red vinyl on Flenser's website. That's the last of the stock I believe

That's pretty fucking depressing actually

I'm sorry man, that must've been really embarrassing. At least you have a new album to be sad to tho

No not really. Honestly I didn't even learn to speak until I was 14. That's why I really want to express myself. Can't use the bathroom on my own either

You just sound like one of those obnoxious type people who's that way because they aren't social enough to hang out with a lot of people. Nothing to be suicidal about, my man. But I guess it does help getting that kind of feel since it does make the isolated feel of the album easier to get because I can also see why that sparse atmosphere might make others think of it as boring.

30 year-old here

if you can, just keep doing what you're doing

eventually as you get older, your peers will give up on shaming you into being quiet, and society will reward you for being open and outgoing

or you could do like I did and just shut up for the rest of your life so that you end up the weird quiet guy whose name no ones in a data entry office

OP here, this guy isn't me: To answer your question, I think I'm smart enough. But maybe it would help if I was more careful with which thoughts I actually chose to express.

It was a cunt being weird and a teacher making a little joke. Unless you left out some details user you're overrating something fierce

huh... that might be good advice as well. Thanks

Iktf, because I'm socially retarded, but are you actually in college? because you shouldnt care this much about some roastie "rejecting" you that you dont even know

sowwy

I'm not leaving anything notable out. You're probably right, but I tend to obsess over bad experiences like this

Wtf? Have you ever actually worked in a professional environment? Why would you encourage people being obnoxious in team based environments?

>oh no, you're a fine partner!
You should said "Yes, I'm thats probably you keep with me."
And destroy your social curse

>And destroy your social curse
>"Yes, I'm thats probably you keep with me."
Not with that terrible English.

That's a really sad story, OP :(((((

That's really suck user. I had a somewhat similar experience with a group of people that I hung out with in my uni too. I expressed myself too much in ways that are mostly inappropriate. During the end of the term one of them won't even bother to small talk to me when there were only two of us. Another one of them left the town and returned for a few days to catch up the other guys and I wasn't even told nor invited to come.

If anything, this sort of experience should be a cue for you to modify your behaviour. Maybe try to speak less with appropriate timing and tone.