*queefs loudly*

*queefs loudly*

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=d14ipSSz3Ss
twitter.com/AnonBabble

what's a queef?

BBBBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

snnnnniiiiiiffffffffffff...oh yes my dear....sssnnnnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiiffffffff....quite pungent indeed...is that....dare I say....sssssssnniff...eggs I smell?......sniff sniff....hmmm...yes...quite so my darling....sniff....quite pungent eggs yes very much so .....ssssssssssssssnnnnnnnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiffffff....ah yes...and also....a hint of....sniff....cheese.....quite wet my dear....sniff...but of yes...this will do nicely....sniff.....please my dear....another if you please....nice a big now....

BBBBBBRRRRRRRAAAAAAAPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPFFFFFF

Oh yes...very good!....very sloppy and wet my dear....hmmmmm...is that a drop of nugget I see on the rim?...hmmmm.....let me.....let me just have a little taste before the sniff my darling.......hmmmmm....hmm..yes....that is a delicate bit of chocolate my dear....ah yes....let me guess...curry for dinner?....oh quite right I am....aren't I?....ok....time for sniff.....sssssnnnnnnniiiiiiiiffffffff.....hmmm...hhhmmmmm I see...yes....yes indeed as well curry......hmmm....that fragrance is quite noticeable....yes.....onion and garlic chutney I take it my dear?.....hmmmmm....yes quite.....

BBBBBBRRRRRRRRPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTT

Oh I was not expecting that…that little gust my dear….you caught me off guard…yes…so gentle it was though…hmmmm…let me taste this little one…just one small sniff…..sniff…ah….ssssssnnnnnniiiiiffffffffffff…and yet…so strong…yes…the odor….sniff sniff…hmmm….is that….sniff….hmmm….I can almost taste it my dear…..yes….just…sniff….a little whiff more if you please…..ssssssnnnnnniiiiiffffffffff…ah yes I have it now….yes quite….hhhhmmmm…delectable my dear…..quite exquisite yes…..I dare say…sniff….the most pungent one yet my dear….ssssnnnnniiiifffffffffffffffffffffff….yes….

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You are mentally ill

Fuck you.

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i would like to rest my head down there, like a pillow

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I used to masturbate onto birds at a local park. Not a thing that I'm particularly proud of but I became quite good at it. I was taking zinc supplements so I was shooting massive loads and it became something of a sport to me. For anyone interested here is your best strategy. first, you need to find an isolated spot so you don't become a sex offender. I found a short kind of channel area where I saw the pigeons would congregate. Next, you arouse yourself. I was usually content with envisioning the occasional jogging lady coming over and queefing on my chest and that was enough to fuel the fire but if you're not as sexually charged as me just take some porn on the go. After you're good an horny, you get some bread. My pigeons preferred white bread but healthier birds might have a taste for honey wheat or maybe even multigrain. Fat, unhealthy birds are slower and easier to hit so remember that. Once you are seated on the bench and ready to do the deed, whip your roosevelt out and scatter bread out within a few feet of you. use your judgement based on how far you know you can cum. I was a lonely and depraved soul who could hit targets the size of a thimble at distances up to 4 feet. You wait for the pigeons to begin eating and to get comfortable with your presence. At this point, you want to coo gently and talk sensually to them to gain their trust. Now you're finally ready to cum on your bird. This is a tough part because the rapid motion of masturbation is very frightening to the birds, so you have to be subtle. Once you master a technique, you simply wind it up and let it go, aiming depending on your past cumming experiences. I always came high so I would aim for the neck of the bird and catch it right in the face. It's an extremely satisfying and erotic feeling, seeing those birds reel around covered in cum and maybe even transporting it to other places in the city.

Inhales deeply then faints from being intoxicated by her scent

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Ask me how I know a Canadian wrote this

How do you know a Canadian wrote this

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I wonder how the janies feel about having to clean this shit EVERY SINGLE DAY

Tell me before I'm done pooping.

but won't the janitors be compensated monetarily?

It's so supremely unfunny and try hard that it could've only came out of a canadian brain

this pasta is pure kino

this

This is the best new pasta on Sup Forums

Better than the harry potter one (but it's very close)

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She ate curry and chutney

>harry potter one
post it quick

okay, why are you such a faggot

Ask me how I know this is a canadian

an australian made it believe it or not

Still pooping, how?

Eat more fiber and drink more water, user.

So based to see actual genuine autism and not same boring le epik racism normie Sup Forums shit we've had the last year

jesus christ

i wish boys' lungs required women's fartgas to survive, not oxygen.

>tfw can't get off on anything other than jap scat porn
where did it all go wrong

ban fartposters

so every guy must always have his lips locked tightly with a woman's anus, so that he can breathe

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>Bump

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some women embrace this new world order gleefully, and readily allow a man to devote his entire existence to her farts

i hate you

go away james joyce

brapposting is taking this board by storm

farts are actually our natural pheromone, but because of our backwards society people are ashamed of the attraction they bring.

then far enough in the future, shrinking technology is developed to alleviate women's duty towards men. now, women can just take their assigned man and stuff his tiny head against her anus, so that she can live a normal life while he spends his existence between her butt cheeks and pressed against her anus

>all these shitposters who coincidentally happen to be pathetic worms who will fetishize any disgusting discharge from a woman's body and never shut up about it

a woman's fart is a sexual temple

>implying i'm not a high-powered sales agent who makes 300k a year alone in commissions and bonuses

fetish shitposting is how i blow off steam man don't be a bully

im actually a chef at Wendy's making 300k

>Derelict post
Best post

sup reddit

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shitposting threads on Sup Forums are the best

No its mostly methane gas. Pheromone glands are not located inside the anus either.

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And they say I'm autistic...

you are wrong, the "methane gas" stuff is a buzzword made to discredit the properties of farts

permaban canadian IP's when?

youtube.com/watch?v=d14ipSSz3Ss

PRAP PRAP PRAP PRAP PRAP PRAP PRAP PRAP PRAP PRAP PRAP PRAP PRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPP PROP PROP PROP PROP PROP PROP PROP PROP PROP PROP PROP PROP PROP PROP PROP PROP PROP

>thread about how attractive an actress is
>thread on Youtube personality
>thread discussing porn stars gone on to film or watching but not porn itself

Jany deletes

>threads with dicks, asses and fart/queefs nothing to do with FILM

Jany ignores for hours

saving this to post in every *BBRRAAAPPPP* thread ever

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film discussion on this board is stupid, it's all video game bullshit like star wars and comic books.

Man I bet her vagina is so warm.

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Who is this male reproductive cells connoisseur?

>be me
>high school
>10/10 sitting in front of me
>she lets one rip
>pull out jar and scoop up the delicate fluffy little cloud
>"This will be quite a nice addition to my collection"
>store jar in backpack with all the others

>No one mentioning the consecutive dubs

Fart posting is cancer.

really gets the old synapses firing

post butts thatd make pretty farts.

>all these tourists on Sup Forums

This pasta is stale as fuck holy shit I can't believe so many newshits are here I hate this place

NOTICE HOW ALL THE BEST POSTS ITT HAVE GOTTEN DUBS

BLESSED BY GOD INSHALLAH

>not getting a degree in math
>300k starting, any job I want

Check 'em

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name a better thread on Sup Forums

protip: you cunt

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this thread just keeps getting better

Jerking off to your own stinky shoe in public. That's pretty fucking bad.

lol Sup Forums

Classic pajeet

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