Monday evening 'Straya thread

How're you doing tonight shitposters?

Foreign friends welcome to banter with us (except for Canadians)

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=JCCRI1Kf6Bk
cecaust.com.au/
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

I fingered her in a nightclub once

>piercing
and dropped

Banter

according to Sup Forums, half of the Australian posters here have fingered her in a nightclub

Why is it that every New Zealander I've met has seemed more intelligent, yet much more insecure, than every Aussie I've met?

Rare and dubs chekt

because they live in discount Australia. They are like our your Canadians

Why is she called Hex?

Coldness makes you smart but also gay

Able to get off 6 guys at a time

This sounds legit, but on the other hand Canadians shitpost more than we do, and kiwis shitpost less than you do. How do you explain that difference?

Skinny, a bit psychotic looking. Just my type.

How many times has she been blacked.

>Trying to get my liberal as fuck parents to not vote for the greens
>Find out some stuff that the greens oppose the Jews's occupation of the west bank and all that shit
>Tell them I really feel sorry for how the Greens are attacking honest hardworking Israelis just trying to live
>They actually fucking buy it and say they'll vote for another party
mfw

>watched some spoopy x videos from the Cern thread

>rational part of my brain knows it's bullshit

>lizard brain has me clutching my .45 at 3 am because Lucifer is going to steal my soul

/x/ needs to stay in x.

We all have user.

Canadians also shitpost gayer than we do. Must just get hot in the summer.

Does it? I personally find the best /x/ threads happen on latenight Sup Forums.

>she

not waiting for the qanda thread to auspost

Whats with the hex fingering references?

I like the way you think.

why would you buy the titanfall bundle?
last time i checked he MP is dead

now that's disturbing

>parents unironically vote for the Christian Democrats

Noice.

Why don't you teach your abos some rugby like the Kiwis did with their Maoris? Fuck, you'd think they'd be useful for something. Maybe as the tip of the spear for human wave tactics against flightless birds or something?

nice cuck shed

Same, I got 3 fingers into her, lel

Why does everyone say they fingered Hex? Is it just a meme or are you referring to something?

Did you happen to find a ring up there? The missus is worried

What's really disturbing is that as fucked up as that kid sounds, I knew an even weirder guy when I was in middle school. But even Sup Forums wouldn't believe what happened, so that's a greentext story for a more delusional board.

kek

please, i want to know

You must use the Jews as your weapon lad

Nobody cares about Union pommy cunt.

we teach them aussie rules football they either git good at that or become savages huffing petrol

Sometimes I feel envious of you guys that have families and still live at home. I am making a family, but I lost a lot at 13 and everything at 18. I am 33 now and have a good family. Enjoy your youth and loved ones. Stop and think what your future self would want you to do on occasion. I wish you all the best.

just woke up

have some tunes
youtube.com/watch?v=JCCRI1Kf6Bk

is kangaroo meat any good? the grocery store near me has some in their fancy meat section

m8 basically everyone has fingered her in a night club

Noice

Same

Heard one guy got five in her vag and one in her ass, and that's why they call her Hex

12,035 players atm

>comparing Aussie shitposts to Canadian "shitposts"

That's like comparing a bottle of fine wine to cheap beer, it just doesn't work

...

You aren't welcome here cancuck faggot

Both get you drunk but take different quantities?

I hate how the only aussie get together is when we go watch Q&A to rage.

We need a uniting issue like the poms and yanks, but pretty much all our major parties are quite horrendous.

No, I fingered her in a nightclub once!

Yeah, I've heard that one, I wouldn't doubt it desu. I've also heard that they call her Hex because your fingers stink for six days after fingering, her no matter how thoroughly you wash your hands - her pussy stench puts a 'hex' on your phalanges.

Kangaroo meat when cooked right is even better than beef.

PC or xbox ?
holy shit

I thought we were friendly neighbours...

Essentially,
>found out about all this at the tail end of seventh grade, but he had been doing this for over a year
>the kid was a little overweight, socially awkward, glasses, carried pokemon cards (which were just becoming a big craze) around all day during school and would put them on his desk during class
>I generally avoided contact with him, like 99% of the rest of the school
>he was so weird that even the two or three bully-ish kids would leave him alone most of the time
>one of his few friends was this incredibly short and wimpy little kid, who did get picked on frequently by bullies
>I didn't know either very well, but I had math class with them and was assigned to sit fairly close to them
>the scrawny little kid liked me because I had stopped a couple bullies from shoving him into a locker the locker room after gym class in sixth grade, and he is the one who told me what happened
>at the very end of seventh grade, the super awkward slightly fat kid stopped coming to school
>the scrawny kid told me that he had been fucking both his mentally retarded sister who was two years younger than him, AND his not mentally retarded sister who was five years younger than him
>the mother found out only after she walked in on it
>the not mentally retarded sister had gone to tell her dad, but the dad had already been abusing the mentally retarded sister, so he just started abusing the not retarded sister as well
This isn't the entirety of what I heard about that family, but it is the most disturbing. Apparently the awkward kid had also sodomized either a dog or a cat, and then killed and skinned it, but that rumor had too many variants for me to be sure it was true.

it aint fancy

but I fucking love the gamey, stringy shit. serve it rare/medium rare

those bouncing bastards are juicy as all fuck but too tough if cooked right through

try soaking the back straps of the jumping cuntrat in soy, BBQ sauce, a little cap of vinegar, and a fair fuckin wallop of golden syrup

too queer? do the cunt in garlic, herbs, chilli flakes and fucking Wooshter soak the gut cuts of that recently murdered rampaging rodent ALL FUCKING WEEK

or roast the entire torso of the high jumping crop fucker stuffed full of beer cans with little pinpricks in the lids the fucken amber liquid will infuse the cunt keep a wet sack over the bastard or some other method to keep the blood in that marsupial masterpiece

We were until Weedman drove you all insane and after our title.

Now you are the old-friend who went weird on us and we've distanced from eachother.

If I'm trying to defend myself from spooks at night I can't defend myself with a .45

feelsbadman

am i ur friend?

You thought wrong, Canadians are by far the most obnoxious unfunny posters on this site, you are an embarrassment to the white race

Are you guys full?

what other things can aus/pol/ unite on cunt?

do u poo in loo?

I couldn't wait for the qanda thread. I need a pre-qanda thread to shitpost with ausbros. lets hope bingoanon is alive and makes the thread tonight

Are you the faggot who spams his comics here?

Assimilate when you come over or die.

come rhajat, we will be suprpower by 2030

The Project bingo?

yes. We are also currently telling people to 'fuck off' because of this

I did once and the toilet broke. Never again am I listening to/pol/'s advice

No I'm the Ivanka + Trump fgt

You are welcome here Poojeet

It's great, but it needs to be rare. It's like fucking leather if it's well done.

get rid of islam and i'll consider it m8

what is this meme?

Colby

Nothing at all, I just wish we had a Trump or Brexit equivalent goal or win condition to strive for m8.

All we got are leftist rags making a national embarrassment of themselves every week.

On the bright side, got a good story.
At the state library the other day studying for my law degree when I overhear the conversation of the Asian kids the table over.

Heavy banter, strayan accent and the word cunt repeated three times. Almost wanted to break into Waltzing Matilda, for the first time in a while I thought we might just be able to pull this off. Australia just might be here a hundred or even a thousand years from now. Strong, cocky nation of smart asses and injokes.

is it on at the same time for all states?

Non mussie curry munchers are excellent. Learn basic hygiene, stop shitting in the street and you're welcome.

We all fingered hex in a nightclub once

katter is pretty based m8 if you are in queensland

I fingered hex in a nightclub once

it's not hard to understand

No.

Oh god please no, I can handle Q&A but the Project makes me want to chuck a wobbly.

...

Why are Strayas so fucking based?
They dont give two shit about how other people see them.

My best friend's a straya and he was cracking jokes about the IRA bombings to some English people who got fucking mad, he just laughed it off and made a joke about the potato famine.

Strayas always talk like theyre super excited about everything as well and keeping every conversation light.
By far my favourite anglos.

Well I think we got an election happening in a few weeks, no clue when but the libs'll win it.

We could unite and get a psychotic minor party in the senate, who wants to go for CEC?

Katter is pretty fucking based, I just wished he had the vision for the whole country rather than just our ailing agricultural industry.

LMAO! Fingered that chick in a nightclub this one time.

fuck no please I will participate for anyone but the fucking Citizens Electoral Council

There are more Canadians than Kiwis, duh.

once someone claimed to have fingered her in a nightclub and it caught on. so everyone started fingering hex in nightclubs.

BEHOLD cecaust.com.au/

Do you not want a maglev train around australia?

>tfw you are a manlet 175cm but fucked this 8/10 tall dutch girl on a tour in the netherlands because of your aussie accent

thanks m8, god bless the dutch

We are a nation that turned sledging into a fine art, our culture is a large and complicated mass of injokes that we take with us abroad, where we then make up a dozen rules on the spot in conversation just to fuck with whoever is trying to find out if we ride kangaroos to school.

>CEC?
literally who is this a right wing meme party?

oh shit sorry in the Senate? yeah OK I will do it, waiting for my postal vote papers this week. should I take photo of Senate ballot, and make post perhaps, to unite auspol to follow my lead?

how about that rugby eh lads

It's streamed live on TenPlay, isnt it? Should be live for all States.

Anytime brah, I wanna bang a Straya cunt one day too, where do I go?

thanks user, we need to stop and smell the roses and appreciate what we have