New Tool Album

GET HYPE IT'S HAPPENING

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boring soft rock drone fest

Their only good records are Opiate and Undertow and a few songs of Aenema

That's just like, your opinion man.

no one gives a shit about this fedoracore

Album won't be in 2018 most likely, but I'm glad they are actually recording something.

>LETS GET EXCITED BECAUSE OTHER PEOPLE ARE GETTING EXCITED

who cares

they're alright

go back to your beach boys album, you fucking low IQ retards

This. Lateralus was tedious and unimaginative, especially by Parabola and Ticks and Leeches, their two worst tracks. Terrible band.

I can understand if you dislike their slow, "soft" songs, but it seems like Ticks and Leeches is a more standard, banging track. I like the drums on it especially. What's so bad about it in your opinion?

The opposite of truth

tool are so fucking gay

were you dropped on your head repeatedly as a child

nah he's just had sex once in his life that's why he doesnt fuck with tool

>has had sex only once
explains why his taste is shit

>boring
I disagree
>soft rock
literally incorrect

literally who

MODS STICKY

Am actually pumped but after waiting years for the new Brand New album and being severely disappointed, probably due to a taste in music/band changing after so long, and I see that happening with the new Tool release. Will probably produce something forgettable and doesn't hold a candle to 10000 Days or Lateralus. But I'm still excited.

You guys are really making a good roleplay of Tool fans here. Keep it up.

Imagine being Keenan and receiving the first material for the new album in 11 years, only to feel like it's shit.

>doesn't hold a candle to 10000 Days or Lateralus
I mean 10,000 Days and Lateralus already don't hold a candle to Aenima

Lateralus is better than Aenima and 10000 days is almost as good

Take it to reddit spergs.

It's naive tribalism at its finest. The drums feel as if rocks were falling on top of the snares, the guitars churn into meaningless distortion without any coherent melody, yet aren't heavy enough to elicit an aggressive response from me, and ultimately, it feels uninspired. One of the many failures Tool has employed in their career was their inability to balance virtuosity and progressivism with creativity.

>pic related is all Tool fans

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Don't you know /moo/ loves Tool now?

>Keenan wrote melodies in like a week
>Is busy with A Perfect Circle prep

I doubt it's going to be great DESU!

That's an interesting take on it. Thanks for taking the time to respond. I personally don't care much what the band's fanbase looks like.

>Tool fans are soyboys
You are actually retarded

>without any coherent melody
>too much of a brainlet to make out an incredibly simple 2 note melody
go back to your trap music
>pic related is everyone that doesn't like tool because "muh incohaseraesent melodeez"
you've either only given the album only one half arsed listen which makes you a total dumbass or you are just a total dumbass

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Holy shit is this what people are referring to when they complain about Tool's fanbase? What a fucking cringe-fest of a thread.

I don't like Tool.

The band plays a tremendously heavy, at times funky, at other times industrial, at most times boring set of up-down-up-down two- or three-chord combinations in most of their songs, but augments them with exceedingly tight rhythms, melodic vocals and lots of artsy quiet parts (so you have to keep turning your stereo volume up and down and up and down - almost as if you're performing one of the band's riffs!).

Their lyrics are generally as negative as my assessment of their music, whether they be threatening rape or making bold, revolutionary statements like 'Christianity is bad.' I wouldn’t argue that the band "sucks out loud" -- the music is far too taut, technical and well-performed for outright dismissal.


I just personally can't get into them because no matter how much concern and exertion the band and its producers put into the *sound* of each song, the riffs themselves seem to be based on a big block of air. In other words, if you sit down to play a Tool song on your acoustic guitar, you'll more than likely find yourself (a) playing a mid-80s Megadeth-style bass line or (b) alternating between two or three tedious barre chords that are right next to each other.

The band is too slow to kick ass and too melodically limited to excite my pleasure centers

and yet intuitively and obviously correct

I don't see how you would come to that opinion on the drums, the snare drum is fairly nuanced, he does the typical light offbeat tap on the snare to accentuate the main hit throughout the track, then does some light snare rolls later in the track. It's not like he's doing blast beats here

The more I listen to Tool - - the more they seem less like an 'intelligent' band and more like a band that seems 'intelligent' to people of average intelligence.

I'm not saying that to put anybody down -- I like plenty of dumb as shit music, an I'm not exactly a Rocket Surgeon. But the whole Tool package, with its unnecessary and ineffectual little musical changes every few seconds, the unceasingly 'serious' mood tied to simplistic riffs, the lyrics that tackle insightful issues in a hamfisted high school philosophy manner - man, I'm dumb as shit and even I'm not dumb enough to fall for this.

It just reeks of 'the uncreative preaching to the easily impressed.' And maybe they're smarter than Migos or Nickleback or something, but how much is that really saying?

why don't you kids like the tool?

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Boring, non-heavy, bad sounding band with cliched, ultra-fedora lyrical themes and zero emotional range.

this is the average level of discourse of Sup Forums what are you talking about?

Are you not doing the same thing you claim they are doing right now?

>It just reeks of 'the uncreative preaching to the easily impressed.' And maybe they're smarter than Migos or Nickleback or something, but how much is that really saying?
This

>unceasingly serious
Literally one of the few genuinely funny bands

prog is disgusting

>missing the point this hard
An immature 2-note sequence is not a coherent melody in the slightest, you absolute philistine. Even an arpeggiated sequence wouldn't be enough to save this one-dimensional mess of a song.
>insinuating that an abhorrence to simplistic garbage equates to a liking for even more sophomoric filth
End yourself immediately, plebeian. Tool is meaningless like you.

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Fedora is for atheism, not new age spiritualism

>tool
>prog
Idiots are disgusting

Go listen to Lil Pump soyboy

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Tool. Their sound is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of music theory most of the songs will go over a typical listener’s head.

The hive has spoken! Gucci gang wins!

I think the main thing to remember is that the 3 musicians in the band have little to do with the theme of the songs; they just like to compose their music the way they do.
As for Keenan, he doesn't take it as seriously as you seem to imply. Sure, he'll criticize religion, and, woohoo, isn't that new, but he does it in a playful, tongue-in-cheek way.

How the fuck is Tool not prog

tool are progressive metal. you cannot dispute this.

>if you don't like my tryhard fedoracore you must like le memerap!!!!!
neck yourself and livestream so i can jack off to it

Tool plays complex music on this CD.

Unfortunately, their idea of 'complex' is to make constant, almost imperceptibly minor changes in and around a basic two- or three-chord riff, such that if you don't listen really really closely to what they're doing, you'll swear they're just playing one bit over and over again for 11 minutes. But they're NOT! I promise you! I

I listened closely, and believe me - the double-guitar interplay, the percussion elements, the time signatures, the palm-muting vs. open chord roaring - it all changes constantly. Just... barely so. And not in a way that makes the songs any more melodically memorable. If anything, you'll come away from it thinking, "If you have THAT good a memory for counting and shifting parts that many times in an epic composition, why not use that memory to memorize some INTERESTING PIECES OF MUSIC?!!?!?"

The entire 78-minute release is ridiculously earnest and self-important. Every single track practically grabs you by the coatcuffs and screams, "This is IMPORTANT! This music is not for FUN! Don't try to ENJOY IT! Music is SERIOUS BUSINESS! STOP SMILING AT IT!" Of particular fault in this department is the drummer, who sticks in more hippy bongos, talking drums and other limp world music instruments than David Byrne at his most pretentious. And to what effect? Now instead of a strong backbeat, they've got what sounds like a guy throwing his shoe around the room. Good work there, drummer guy. Good planning.

Also, for a band that is so often put on a pedestal as 'intelligent heavy metal,' these are about the stupidest fuckin' lyrics I've read in the past ten years. Okay, here's a bit from "Vicarious," a song about watching violence on TV: "I need to watch things die/From a distance/Vicariously/I live while the whole world dies/You all need it too - don't lie./Why can't we just admit it?" Oooooh! ZINGER! I have to assume he wrote this song when he was in the 6th grade and just kept it around

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Undertow was so fucking good. Aenima had a few good songs but was mostly filler. Everything after that is complete ass.

Is it Justin Chancellor's fault???

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oof

Tool is a weird progressive metal band if you actually think that's what they are, and progressive metal is not prog. Progressive metal has elements of prog but it's a completely different style of music, not a sub genre of prog. Any actual prog fan will agree. Tool has zero to do with Yes, and liking one would not indicate any likelihood that you would like the other. They are unrelated. Tool is not prog.

Holy shit, you've got to tell me which reviewer this is from, I'm laughing my ass off.

tool are for tools

See: Prog is more than "OMG 5/4". Is Dave Brubeck prog? Tool sounds more like a late term aborted grunge band than a prog band.

Tool never claimed to know the answer to everything or be "enlightened" like you circle jerking faggots pretend just so you get a chance at sucking each others cocks.

>All this tool pasta
Why does uncriticizable music piss so many people off?

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it's the type of music that Sup Forums posters like
we don't want those people to feel welcome here

You mean your epic gay pepe club?

I like how no one understands that Tool likes to fuck with his own fans more than any other band ever
I bet everything I got that they will release the album by surprise one of those days (weeks, months, y'know, but unannounced)

markprindle.com/tool.htm

Literally the most kino reviewer ever, he's hillarious

Yeah we should welcome hip hop and waifu pop loving nu-males instead

>doesn't know what coherent means
>tries to make up for it by using the word philistine and pretending to know what an arpeggiated sequence is
back to grade school lad

>uncriticizable music

Just stop, dude.

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i haev no idea what this is trying to convey

i hate waifufags and most hip hop as well, two wrongs don't make a right. that's actually the exact reason why we need to put our foot done: we have to stop things from getting worse.

You *do* know that there is more to music than your favorite band and two genres you hate... right?

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literally never listened to this band because of their awful radiohead tier fans. where do i start?

the new tool album is already recorded and it's actually already uploaded onto youtube but it's a private video and there's no way we can find them

>average Tool fan believes the only music other than Tool is girl pop and hip hop
I now understand how people could actually believe Tool is deep and interesting.

>admit that Tool started out as King Crimson worship
>it sounds super apparent on Undertow

yeah okay

with their first release, like any other artist

Tell me what you listen to, I'm sure I too can find a way to shit on it to make me feel better about myself.

Well I don't listen to Tool so it must be girl pop and rippity rappin, right?

Nice evasion

Why would you need to start with their first release? It's not a movie sequel he's not missing anything if he listens to the 3rd or 4th tool album.

Explain how and why you consider Tool soft rock.

>Tool is such a great band!

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I hope you're black so it stings when I call you a retarded nigger. Coherence is having a logically sound and intelligent quality to it. There is nothing intelligent nor aesthetically resonating about a primitive, cavemen-esque musical composition, you absolute mongoloid. It's simplistic garbage only an imbecile would mistake for brilliance. Back to your mother's womb, insufferable cretin.

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It's your metric my dude. I listen to 70's prog, techno, IDM, ambient, mathrock, 60's folk, various singer songwriters from all eras, some classic rock, death metal, progressive metal, classical, and a lot of traditional folk music from various cultures, mostly.

Wow, you must be pretty intelligent then. You probably also think all Tool fans are the same and only listen to Tool.
What's your IQ and dick size man?

Aenima is the most approachable, Undertow is more raw and banging, Lateralus is slower, more introspective, and 10000 Days is more intense with less hardness to it.

not that guy but this is really such a pathetic post

>t. that guy

>mfw i see a tool thread

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Lateralus is a good starting point IMO

>phoneposter

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>claims that all music other than Tool is girl pop and hip hop
>you probably also think all Tool fans are the same and only listen to Tool
?

>What's your IQ and dick size man?
>FUCKIN I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY AND I'M NOT VERY SMART FUCKING REEEEEEEE
You are a sad poster my man.

>logical OR aesthetic
>literal definition on his dumb phoneposting hands
>thinks that 2 notes are too illogical and incoherent
>continues to flaunt around words he found in a thesaurus in his attempt to mask his autism
are you literally retarded?

I never claimed what you said I did because I'm not stupid.

...

>not understanding that this failed attempt of a song is neither logically NOR aesthetically integrated at all, therefore rendering it incoherent
Primitivism is not coherent in the slightest. It's undeveloped, immature and completely one dimensional, therefore making it as incoherent as a Homosapien attempting to draw a work of maximalism. Tool is a terrible band that deserves nothing but ridicule for their shallow, pathetic excuses for songs. Get fucked, you idiot. Only brainlets enjoy this gibberish.

A coherent melody uses multiple scales, harmonies and notes that perfectly mesh together. This is something Tool lacked severely with this song. It does not properly utilize the fundamentals of music properly, and as such, it's merely a child's song glorified into pseudo-intellectualism. Stop posting.

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Wow you are an epic haxorz
Except I didn't post that

Well that definitely makes Tool good and not shit. Oh wait

>A coherent melody uses multiple scales, harmonies and notes that perfectly mesh together
Even if that were true, that song does all that

>A coherent melody uses multiple scales, harmonies and notes that perfectly mesh together.
It does that. It's not the band's fault you're too autistic to make it out. Either study music theory or stop pretending you do and go back to Kanye and 6ix9ine

Tbh at this point I'm more hype for new perfect circle.

No, it doesn't. It's underwhelming, boring and simplistic, as aforementioned many times.
>Kanye and 6ix9ine
I don't even like those fucking degenerates, you idiot. Good job proving the stereotype that all Tool haters only listen to rap or pop, retard.

And by the way, I was the same person who made this thread. Eat a dick, nigger.

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