Dear Mr Potter

>Dear Mr Potter,
>The Ministry has received intelligence that at six twenty-three, this evening, you performed the Patronus Charm in the presence of a Muggle.
>As a clear violation of the Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery, you are hereby expelled from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
>You will be tried and prosecuted under the full accorandance of the law and are herby sentenced to death
>Please say your final goodbyes and report for extermination in the hinkypunk gas chambers, tomorrow morning at ten o' clock.
>Hoping you are well, Mafalda Hopkirk
>*camera zooms on Harry's blank face*
>*cut to Uncle Vernon*
>looking directly into the camera he exclaims, "Justice"
You might not like it, but they nailed the tone.

>You will be tried and prosecuted
>are herby sentenced to death
?????????????????????

That's all fine and well, but it's like putting lipstick on a pig, icing on a pile of feces, or someone with Down's Syndrome in charge of NASA. I mean, it's amusing, but ultimately quite disappointing.

I suppose that's befitting of one of the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody, just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

I am sorry, dear, but toquestion mypractices is toquestiontheMinistry, and by extension, theMinister himself.

Worked in wizard murica.

would like her to peg me with a magic dildo desu

Alfonso Cuaron could've saved those movies if he'd done more than one. Instead, Yates ran it all into the ground.

@78668510
This kid who hates harry potter and religiously autisms it up rivals barneyfag. No life, no self awareness, no sense of irony, hates memes. I think we get you have a personal problem.

Yates is a kinoman

Is this image bait?

No if Newell had accepted to do order of the phoenix it would have been a disaster. Cuaron was offered goblet of fire but the pre production and post production was overlapping since they shot them back to back.

The entire thing is bait and has been posted a couple thousand times since april

I always got turned on by the skin writing scene. I want her to write dirty things on me.

That's fucking weird

The image is old /lit/ bait, the text is objective fact, most of it is from an article Harold 'Based Bloomy' Bloom wrote

(you)

t. Harry potter autismking

Where's Discworld and the Stormlight Archive

Also, shit opening

My bf feels the same about that scene. We write things on each other sometimes.

Writing things on eachother is fine. Wanting some bitch to torture you writing/carving on you is another

Sadism/masochism isn't even a rare fetish.

She's not attractive though

That's not the point. The point is the act itself not the person doing it.

It doesn't compute with that bitch

>be British wizard
>use your wand to cut your steak
>yfw sentenced to the hinkypunk gas chambers